Joseph in his Personal house

Now again, I hope it doesn't come as a surprise, the book of Genesis, if you will. Genesis, and again we will be doing cross-sectional reading rather than one particular chapter. I'm going to ask you to turn to Genesis and chapter 43.

The brothers have come down now, this is the second time. Look at verse number 16. And when Joseph saw Benjamin with them, he said to the ruler of his house, Bring these men home, and slay and make ready, for these men shall dine with me at noon.

And the man did as Joseph bade, and the man brought the men into Joseph's house. And the men were afraid, because they were brought into Joseph's house. And so on.

Now you know the story well of what follows. Let's, for the sake of time, look down at verse number 24. And the man brought the men into Joseph's house, and gave them water, and washed their feet, and gave them their asses provender, and made ready the present against Joseph came at noon.

For they heard that they should eat bread there. And when Joseph came home, they brought him the present, which was in their hand, into the house, and bowed themselves to him on the earth. And they asked him of their welfare, and said, Is your father well, the old man of whom you speak? Is he yet alive? And they answered, Thy servant our father is in good health, he is yet alive.

And they bowed down their heads and made obeisance. And he lifted up his eyes and saw his brother Benjamin, his mother's son, and said, Is this your younger brother of whom you speak unto me? And he said, God be gracious unto thee, my son. And Joseph made haste, for his bowels did yearn upon his brother.

And he sought where to weep, and entered into his chamber, and wept there. And he washed his face, went out, refrained himself, and said, Set on bread. And they set for him by himself, and for them by themselves, and for the Egyptians, which they ate with him by themselves, because the Egyptians might not eat bread with the Hebrews, for that is an abomination unto the Egyptians.

And they sat before him the first, according to his birthright, and the youngest, according to his youth. And the men marveled one another. And he took and sent messes unto them from before him.

But Benjamin's mess was five times so much as any of theirs. And they drank and were married with him. Chapter 44, hard to know where to break into some of these things.

The cup has been found in Benjamin's sack. And they returned, verse 14, and Judah and his brother came to Joseph's house. Again, we're in Joseph's house.

For he was yet there, and they fell before him on the ground. And Joseph said unto them, What deed is this that ye have done? Wot ye not that such a man as I can certainly divine? And Judah said, What shall we say unto my Lord? What shall we speak, or how shall we clear ourselves? God hath found out the iniquity of thy servants. Behold, we are my Lord's servants, both we and he also with whom the cup is found.

And he said, God forbid that I should do so. But the man in whose hand the cup is found, he shall be my servant. As for you, get ye up in peace unto your father.

And then we have Judah's eloquent, moving, impassioned plea. Just for the sake of time, down the chapter, it's well worth reading the whole thing. Verse 30, Now therefore, when I come to thy servant my father, and the lad be not with us, seeing that his life is bound up in the lad's life, it shall come to pass, when ye see that the lad is not with us, that he will die.

And thy servant shall bring down the gray hairs of thy servant, our father, with sorrow to the grave. Now that is remarkable, because those are almost the same words that Jacob spake when they came back with Joseph's coat, and they could care less that their father was going to be brought to the grave in sorrow. Almost the exact same words that Jacob himself speaks.

Verse 32, For thy servant became surety for the lad unto my father, saying, If I bring him not unto thee, then I shall bear the blame to my father forever. Now therefore, I pray thee, let thy servant abide instead of the lad abundant to my lord. Let the lad go up with his brethren, for how shall I go up to my father, and the lad be not with me? Thus peradventure I see evil that should come on my father.

And Joseph could not refrain himself before all them that stood by him. And he cried, Cause every man to go out from me. And there stood no man with him, while Joseph made himself known unto his brethren.

And he wept aloud, and the Egyptians and the house of Pharaoh heard. And Joseph said unto them, I am Joseph, doth my father yet live? And his brethren could not answer him, for they were troubled at his presence. And Joseph said unto his brethren, Come near, I pray you.

And they came near, and he said, I am Joseph your brother, whom ye sold into Egypt. Now therefore, be not grieved nor angry with yourselves that ye sold me hither, for God hath sent me before you to preserve life. Verse 9, Hast you go up to my father, saying unto him, Thus saith thy son Joseph, God hath made me lord of all Egypt.

Come down unto me and tarry not. Thou shalt dwell in the land of Goshen. Thou shalt be near unto me, thou and my children, and my children's children, my flocks, herds, and all that thou hast.

And there will I nourish thee. For there are yet five years of famine, lest thou and the household and all that thou hast come to poverty. Verse 14, He fell upon his brother Benjamin's neck and wept.

And Benjamin wept upon his neck. Moreover, he kissed all his brethren and wept upon them. And after that his brethren talked with him.

Then the fame, of course, comes to Pharaoh's house. Verse 17, Pharaoh said unto Joseph, Say unto thy brethren, This do lazy beasts then go and get you into the land of Canaan, and take your father and households, and come unto me, and I will give you the good of the land of Egypt, and ye shall eat the fat of the land. Now thou art commanded, This do ye.

Take ye wagons out of the land of Egypt for your little ones and your wives, and bring your father and come. And regard not your stuff, for the good of all the land of Egypt is yours. And the children of Israel did so.

And verse 22, To all he gave each man changes of raiment, but to Benjamin he gave three hundred pieces of silver and five changes of raiment. And to his father he sent after this manner ten asses laden with the good things of Egypt, and ten she-asses laden with corn and bread, and meat for his father by the way. So he sent his brethren away, and they departed.

And he said unto them, See that ye fall not out by the way. Now I trust God will add his blessing. I have limited the reading for the sake of time, because really there is so much that could be read.

But what we have read are events that took place in Joseph's house. So we have considered together through the weekend the events that took place, first of all, in his parents' house as a teenager. We have seen the events that took place in Potiphar's house when he was under temptation from that wicked woman.

We have seen the events that took place in the prison house when he knew trial and affliction. We have seen the events that took place in Pharaoh's house when he is exalted to a place of honor and to a place of importance. And now we are considering something of what took place in his own house when he is seen triumphant.

And finally, all the promises of God relative to his exaltation and his brother's submission have come true. So let me talk, first of all, about Joseph's home. I want to talk about heaven's character that was present there.

Heaven's character that was present in that home. There are four things, and I think you can see them very clearly and very directly as you consider what we have read about Joseph's home. First of all, headship was acknowledged in this home.

There was no question who was head of this home. Headship was owned. Then also hospitality was extended.

Hospitality was displayed. Holiness was evident there as well, as we shall see. And finally, and it is most significant, harmony was found at Joseph's table.

Now we'll look at why that was so important and why that actually was just not a nice feature, but really was a test. A test of those brothers at his table. Was God working in their lives to bring about restoration? So let me just then mention these.

First of all, we'll look at heaven's character. We'll look as well at the honor of his father, which was paramount in Joseph's house. What he was working towards was not so much these boys apologizing to him, but did they have a care for their father? Did they realize they had grieved their father? Because that's really what all their restoration hinged upon.

So the honor of his father, that was important. And then finally, a third feature of Joseph's house. It's a place where healing, it was a house of healing, where breaches and sins were forgiven and difficulties were dealt with.

It was a place of healing. So it's a place where heaven's character was stamped, it's a place where the honor of the father was maintained, and it was a place where healing was shown towards others with need. Now, that will more than occupy our time, and we will have to just be brief on a number of these things, but hopefully just by mentioning them will give you some material to consider for yourself in your own meditation.

Heaven's character present. Joseph was evident head of that home. There was no question.

And so we read together in chapter 43, Joseph says, bring these men home. Joseph is the one who is giving the direction. Joseph is the one who is in control.

It's a home that is marked by headship. Now, every Christian home should be a home where headship is in evidence and headship is practiced. It's not a matter that headship is I am the boss or I am in charge and you must do as I say, but it is the idea of what God intends headship to be, that of serving the needs of others and yet of being responsible for all that occurs and the control of all in that home.

The absence of headship leads to rivalry, leads to insecurity, leads to confusion. So every home needs to be marked by godly headship. It's what God has instituted.

But there was another thing here about this home, and it was marked by hospitality. Hospitality. And so David says, bring these men home.

It wasn't something out of the ordinary. It wasn't something unusual. It was something the steward was obviously very accustomed to, that David's home was a place marked by hospitality.

Now, I see a number of younger believers here, so let me just encourage you if I can, because I think in a day where we are so used to lovely homes and tremendous spreads on the table and everything else, we tend to link hospitality with how big a home you have. But hospitality has nothing to do with the size of a home. It has everything to do with the size of your heart.

That's really what hospitality depends upon. And so in the simplest of little apartments, in the simplest of little living quarters, opening your home, don't worry about whether you've dusted everything. My wife drives me crazy.

A little bit of dust on the piano and someone's coming and it's like, forget it. Forget it. I know there are a few people who look for dust in cobwebs, but I'm not one of them.

So don't worry. Never invite me. I don't go around looking for dust in cobwebs.

Just open your home to the Christians. Open your home to others. I cannot tell you the blessing, spiritually, of what it is to have others in your home, other Christians in your home.

Only those who have experienced it, only those who have made it an exercise in their life can be able to attest as to the tremendous blessing and benefit upon your children, upon yourselves, your own spiritual life. Now I know it's an inconvenience. It's an inconvenience.

It's hard for two women to be in the same house for very long together. You know, you get that awkwardness in the kitchen. Who's in charge and what can I do and should I ask and shouldn't I ask? All this awkwardness that comes from that type of thing.

But still, as much as possible, practice hospitality. That's exactly what Joseph did here and all that was needed to make these men comfortable and make them feel at home was provided. It doesn't mean you've got to be lavish.

It doesn't mean you've got to necessarily mortgage your first child so you can put on a lavish spread. It's not the idea. The idea is to share what you have.

More than what you eat and more than what you consume is your conversation and your fellowship together. I'm sure some of you have had the same experience we have had. There have been many times I have gone to conferences and I cannot tell you what was spoken on at the conference, but I can tell you the profit from conversation around a table with other Christians after a conference.

Tremendous profit. Spiritually sharpening. As an iron sharpeneth iron, so we sharpen each other's countenances.

And so there is tremendous value in hospitality and opening your home and in making your home available. Amidst that hospitality, there was obviously a genuine interest that was shown in these men. It wasn't just a perfunctory thing.

Well, you know, we've got to entertain, so we've got to take two people. So come, there's your room. We'll see you in the morning.

Breakfast is at seven. But you notice how Joseph dealt with him in chapter 43. Peace be to you.

Fear not. Joseph came. He asked him about their welfare.

Is your father well? And so on. He's got a care for them and a concern for them. And likewise, that should mark us in our attempts to show hospitality one to another.

But let me talk to you about as well in this home, holiness was manifested. Holiness was maintained. You will notice that when it came to the seating at the end of chapter 43, we read together those words in verse 32.

They set for him by himself, for them by themselves, for the Egyptians, which they eat by themselves. There was separation in this home. Now, you understand that.

I know the idea here was the Hebrews and the Egyptians. There was that abomination for the Egyptians to be with the Hebrew and so on. But there was this.

There were boundaries that were maintained. There were boundaries that were maintained in this home. Now, we should always be very clear that headship involves responsibility to maintain boundaries in our homes.

It's a place where separation should be maintained. Now, I know we cannot control what our children and our families are doing out there. But home is where separation should be maintained.

It's where divine standards should be upheld. Again, what friends, what neighbors, what others do where they are, that's their business. But when we invite them into our home, when we invite them in and try to get to know them, then divine standards are maintained as far as holiness.

We don't compromise our principles because, well, we have to get friendly with the neighbors, and so you have to kind of do things their way. No. Standards are maintained.

It's a place where the scriptures are honored, where the word of God has its place in the Christian home, where the word of God is open. Now, every home is different. Every family is different.

Your own particular schedule. Some find it easier to have a time in the morning. Some have it easier to have a time at night.

Some have other times. But it should be a place where the scriptures are given their place in every Christian home. We cannot, we dare not, depend upon a Christian school to teach our children the word of God.

And it is not even primarily the responsibility of Sunday school teachers to teach our children the word of God. It is parental responsibility. It is part of the headship given to every man in his home that he is responsible that the word of God be taught and the word of God be honored in that home.

But then, finally, the fourth thing is it's a place where saints are respected. The people of God are respected. Where conversation is guarded in the presence of unsaved, especially unsaved children, and where there is that respect for the people of God when the family is together.

So, headship, hospitality, holiness. Let me just mention one other thing about Joseph's home, and it was a place where harmony was seen. First of all, it was a place where everyone was in their place, wasn't it? There was order.

They were there from the oldest to the youngest, and the men marveled at the order that was displayed at this table. But then, look at chapter 43, first of all. Notice what it says at the end of verse 34.

And he took and sent messes unto them from before him, but Benjamin's mess was five times. Benjamin's mess was five times as much as any of theirs. What was the result? What happened? They were married.

What's significant about that? What was Joseph doing? What was Joseph doing when he intentionally sent five times as much down to Benjamin's end of the table? Now, I would think if they sat in order from the oldest to the youngest, just literally, that five-fold increase had to pass all those other brothers by to make it to the other end of the table where Benjamin was. So they would have all seen it. It would have all been very obvious.

What was he doing? What was he looking for? What was it that caused the problem to begin with, back in chapter 37? It's that a father had given something to one son that he didn't give to the others, and they envied him. So now Joseph is going to say, I wonder if God has been working in their lives. And that terrible sin of envy, they recognize how evil it is.

Let me put them to the test. Let me give Benjamin more. Let me see how they respond to it.

Do you see how wise Joseph is? This is not just Joseph inviting his brothers in and waiting for the right moment. Joseph is testing, testing everything. He's going to test, first of all, the sin of envy that was the root of the evil that had occurred.

And so he sends five portions greater to Benjamin. And instead of being envious, it says they were married. Now I think on the one hand, because you cannot help but read this.

We didn't read it. We should have read the verses earlier. The first time they come down and Joseph is dealing with them, among themselves they say, God has found out our iniquity.

Did I not tell you we shouldn't have sold our brother? You see, even though years had passed, even though decades had passed since they had said goodbye to Joseph, in their minds had been working the reality of conscience and bothering them. And suddenly when they're confronted with disaster in Egypt, their mind springs back like a loaded spring to what occurred years before. And they said, God is punishing us because of that.

And then, of course, we read together when they are confronted, when the cup is in Benjamin's sack and they come back, what do they say? God has found out the iniquity of my servants. God is bringing it home to roost, finally, after all these years. You see, their conscience was at work.

But there was something else involved as well here, I think. Another reason that they were not filled with envy and bitter and angry and delighted, they didn't care what Benjamin got. You know what it was? I think it was because they realized we deserve nothing.

We deserve nothing. And we're sitting at the table of the second highest power in Egypt? Imagine that. I mean, it would be as though you and I today were called to Washington and allowed to have dinner with the Bushes and maybe you got two pork chops and I got one.

And we would be so in awe of being there to think, I've got no right to be here at all. How can I possibly feel as though he's got more? I deserve nothing. So what if he's got a little bit more than I do? I deserve nothing to begin with.

Do you ever feel that way sitting with Christians on a Sunday morning? Imagine me here. Imagine me here. Imagine that God actually has put me here among his people.

So envy? Jealousy? To think that I deserve nothing. To think that grace has brought me in to sit with these other believers. To banish any idea of envy amongst us.

To realize that we deserve nothing. So what if God gives someone something more? So what if God blesses some with something else? So what if I have less than you? If my gift is less than yours? If my abilities are less than yours? If my importance is less than yours? So what? We deserve nothing. How can we sit back with envy because we think we deserve something that you have? No, no.

They were so thrilled. Overwhelmed with the wonder of being in the presence of Joseph. Being set at a large table with every need met that they could care less that Benjamin got more.

Because they were now appreciating mercy and grace. Recognizing they deserve nothing. So you will understand then, this tremendous test that Joseph has put them to, and they are merry.

Let me just say something, and it may not be exactly related to what we're looking at here, but I think it is. There is a concept that I would long to be able to communicate to you, especially younger believers, beginning families, beginning homes, and that is a Christian home. A Christian home should be a safe haven.

Now, let me just explain what I mean. It shouldn't be a place marked by contention, by bitterness, by difficulties between spouses, difficulties between spouses and children, parents and children. It should be a safe haven.

It should be a place where, if there's no other place in the world you can go to find absolute security and unconditional love, it should be when you close the door of your home and you're with your family. I'm not minimizing the assembly. I'm not minimizing the value of the assembly in any way.

The assembly should be a safe haven as well. But of course, we are not responsible for others in the assembly, so at times it can be a bit difficult. Well, the assembly should be a safe haven, and leadership should strive to make it that in every way possible.

But certainly our homes, our families should be safe havens, places of harmony, places where there's unconditional love, places where there's interest and care shown one for another, just as Joseph's home was found to be here in Egypt. So we have then heaven's character, which was present in this home. I want to talk about the honor of the father that was the paramount interest in this.

These ten brothers, not eleven, Benjamin was too young at the time, these ten brothers had deeply grieved their father's heart. You recall that scene that we read, I think, in our first meeting, when they returned to their father Jacob with Joseph's coat, smeared with the blood of the animal that they had slaughtered. And with guile and with malicious innocence, they bring the coat to Jacob and say, whether this be Joseph's coat, we don't know, but here's what we found in the field.

And of course, the old man's heart is broken. The old man's heart is crushed. And he begins to weep.

And he says, I will go down to the grave in sorrow. Joseph is without doubt rent in pieces. I will go down to the grave in sorrow.

And it says they rose up to comfort him, but he wouldn't be comforted. Hypocrites make poor comforters, very poor comforters in times of trial and sorrow. Hypocrites don't do well.

And in all their hypocrisy, those ten boys had the one thing that would have dried Jacob's tears, healed Jacob's heart, lifted Jacob's spirits, and yet they withheld it from him and watched him grieve. Watched him grieve for days, careless of the grief they had caused their father, careless of the tears they were causing to come from his heart. And they watched him grieve.

Now, Joseph is working to this end, not for these boys to apologize to him, but do they have a care for their father? Do they have a care for their father? That's really what is going to determine whether it is time to convey the forgiveness he longed to convey to them. And so he puts them to the test. And you know the scenario, you know what happens.

The cup is put in Benjamin's sack, the boys take off for home. You can imagine, can't you? You can just imagine how great these boys felt. Wow! Got to eat with the second man in charge in the government of Egypt, our sacks filled with corn, going home.

Wow! And imagine our father worrying about Benjamin and about Simeon. Didn't he know we would be able to take care of this? And with a sense of tremendous triumph and a sense of accomplishment, they begin their trek back to Canaan and suddenly Joseph's men overtake them. And you know what happens.

The cup is found in the sack of the only innocent one. That's a picture, isn't it, of Calvary? The cup in the sack of the only innocent one. And so they all come back.

And Joseph puts on his stern appearance and makes it very clear, Don't you know such a man as I can divine that I knew one of you had taken it? And makes clear, Benjamin is going to be my slave, the rest of you... Now notice what he says. Notice the almost irony of Joseph's words. The rest of you, get you up to your father in peace.

Okay. Could they do it? Get you up to your father... To go back to the father would mean anything but peace. So Joseph is just kind of being ironic.

Get you up to your father in peace. And Judah steps forward. And I think it was intimated somewhere in the outline that it's interesting that when the kingdom was divided, Benjamin and Judah always moved together.

And it may well be that it was from this moment on that that link was forged between these two tribes. That Judah stood forward and said, Take me and let him go. Let me stay as your slave.

Let Benjamin go. He said, I cannot go up to my father and the lad be not with me. Peradventure, I see the sorrow of my father.

It will bring my father down to the grave in sorrow and I can't do that. I would rather be a slave than see my father suffer. Now let me just for a moment give that a practical twist.

Because really, genuine repentance for any one of us, from any sin, from all of our wanderings, from all of our failure, from all of our things that we need to confess daily to the Lord. Genuine repentance is just that. I have grieved his heart.

I have brought him sorrow. And I would rather do anything other than bring sorrow to his heart. That's what Joseph was testing.

Did they care? Not what they had done to Joseph. Please notice that. It is not what they had done to Joseph that mattered to Joseph.

It's what they had done to their father that mattered to Joseph. Now we're going to look at that in just a moment because that is vital to see in all of our dealings with each other. More so than even just the practical import I'm giving it right now.

But you will then notice here that in Joseph's house, what was paramount was this. My father's honor. My father's honor is what matters to me more than anything else.

Now every Christian home should be occupied with that same great goal. That this home, the purpose of this home is to bring honor to God. To bring honor to the Lord Jesus.

That this home will function. This home will be controlled. This home will be guided.

This home will be characterized by whatever is going to bring honor to the Lord Jesus. Whatever is going to bring honor to the Father in Heaven. That is what we want our home to be.

And so if headship is needed, harmony is needed, holiness is needed, and there needs to be hospitality, and we will see to all of these things so that our home will be a haven and will be a place where God is honored and where the Lord Jesus Christ is glorified as a result of our home. Remember this. Our assemblies will only be as good as our homes.

Now I'm not saying that you have to have a home as a married person, even for single people. The same is true. If you're single, have your own place, your own apartment, your own whatever it is.

Our assemblies will only be as strong as individual homes. Because we cannot be one thing at home and something else in the assembly. We cannot live a divided life.

There needs to be that consistency of character. And so then here is a place where the honor of the Father was paramount. But I want to come especially though to the healing that was present.

It was a place where Joseph could convey forgiveness. Forgiveness. We read of it in the beginning of chapter 46.

Cause every man to go out from me. Rather, the beginning of chapter 45. Cause every man to go out from me.

And Joseph said unto his brother, I am Joseph. Doth my father yet live? Now many times Christians ask, well how can you forgive someone if they haven't repented? How can you forgive someone if they haven't come to you and said and so forth and so on? But what I want to suggest to you is this. My primary responsibility My primary responsibility as a believer is to have a forgiving spirit.

To be ready to forgive. Joseph was ready from day one to forgive his brothers. But he realized there needed to be the display that they were ready for it.

Ready to receive it. Now that doesn't mean we hold back and we you've got to say you're sorry ten times. Don't make people jump through hoops.

The word of God is clear. If your brother's offended, you go to him and if he says, if he asks for forgiveness, you extend it. But even when he does not ask for forgiveness, even when she does not ask for forgiveness, my responsibility is to have a spirit of forgiveness towards others.

Not a spirit of retaliation. Not a spirit of revenge. Not a spirit of hardness.

Not a spirit of bitterness. But Joseph is mad. You've got to hold Joseph back really.

Joseph had to be restrained from forgiving. He had to give vent to it by his tears time and again. You can read it in Joseph's life.

Seven different times he wept. And Joseph always wept because of the sin of others. In contrast to David.

David's life of tears. You can trace David's weepings. Some of David's weepings were for others, but some of David's weepings were for his own sins.

But Joseph weeps seven times because of others. He's a man with a soft, tender heart. Not a hard heart.

Not a callous heart. He's got a deep, deep desire to see his brothers restored and so almost his first words to them are, be not grieved. Be not grieved.

I'm Joseph, your brother. Now I want to mention one other thing. We mentioned yesterday, I think once or twice actually, that Joseph saw his brothers restored and he never once mentioned their sin to the Egyptians.

That's a remarkable thing. Egypt never heard of what Joseph's brothers did. But I want to tell you something even more remarkable.

And that's that Joseph saw his brothers restored without ever once mentioning their sin to them. He doesn't mention it until he gives them forgiveness. I am Joseph, whom ye sold into Egypt.

Be not grieved. He didn't bring up the sin before this. He doesn't mention it before this.

He is allowing God to work in their consciences and in their hearts. He is not so concerned about what they did to him. He is concerned that they were consumed with envy and he's testing that.

He is concerned that they were indifferent to their father. He is testing that. He is concerned that they brought grief and dishonor to their father.

He is testing that. And when they pass all of those tests, without them ever saying, Joseph, we're sorry for what we did to you. He says, you're forgiven.

I'm Joseph, whom you sold. Now I don't know if that carries any weight in your thinking about dealings with other believers. But Joseph wasn't concerned about himself.

Joseph was not looking out for Joseph. It's hard for us to appreciate this, because it's so different from how we think. But what Joseph was concerned about was the spiritual welfare of those brothers and the heart of his father.

Joseph came last. It wasn't that they had to come and tell Joseph, Joseph, we are so sorry for what we did to you. We are so filled with remorse and regret.

How could we have ever done that to you? We do apologize. That's not here. It's absent.

Because that wasn't Joseph's great concern. It wasn't what they had done so much to him as their own spiritual condition and their father's grief and sorrow. And so once he sees that they have reached that point, he says, I'm Joseph.

Be not grieved. Come near. But not only does he convey forgiveness, he kissed every one of them and he talked with every one of them.

You see, you've been in circumstances, haven't you? Not in the assembly, but just go to your own home and your own neighborhood and your own relationships individually with others. You've been in situations where there was a difficulty, something minor, and you went to someone or they came to you and expressed sorrow, regret for what they had done, and asked for forgiveness. And, yeah, okay, forget it.

Won't bring it up again. It's done. In a very cold, indifferent manner that made you realize, wow, if that's forgiveness, I think I need something else.

It's not how Joseph was. Joseph kissed his brothers. Listen, there's nothing between us.

There is no distance between us anymore. Everything is absolutely, in the past, is gone. The door is shut, never to be opened again.

And so Joseph kissed them, and we read as well how we're told that he kissed and wept upon them, and after that his brethren talked with him. So, not just what he did, but how he did it. How he conveyed that forgiveness.

With sincerity and with genuine care to communicate that, there was no question. His forgiveness was not half-hearted. His forgiveness was not just official and cold and dry.

His forgiveness was genuine, warm, and real. And he conveyed it that way to them. You will notice, won't you, as you look in the Word of God, different instances where there is forgiveness extended.

You recall if you go back in the Old Testament, not back, everything's forward from Genesis. If you go into the Old Testament, the book of Hosea, there is a man that has to welcome back and forgive a prodigal spouse. You recall Philemon had to forgive and welcome back a prodigal servant.

You recall, don't you, as well, that when you come to Luke 15, there was a father who had to welcome back a prodigal son. Forgiveness is maybe best seen in that Luke 15 passage. You know what the father does? This my son was dead and is alive.

He was lost and he's found. You know what he's doing in those few terse words? What he's doing is closing the door on the past. That's a done deal.

That's a done chapter. We're opening a new chapter now. We don't revisit that again.

And so forgiveness was not just free and not just full, but it was final. Final. That's how God has forgiven you and me, hasn't it? God hasn't made no conditions.

He doesn't revisit our sins. He doesn't revisit our past. When He saved us, when He forgave us, He said, their sins and iniquities will I remember no more.

He chooses not to think of them ever again. That's how God has saved you. That's what God has done for you and done for me.

Sin, He's closed the door on it. And now He says, new chapter beginning. So here then was a place where forgiveness was conveyed.

But here was a place as well where a focus was communicated. What I mean by that is, Joseph just doesn't forgive their sins, as wonderful as that is. But Joseph does something else.

He begins to help them to see things as God sees things. He tells them in that chapter, chapter 46, as you go down that chapter, he says, God sent me before you to preserve life by a great deliverance. So now it wasn't you that sent me hither, but God.

He's made me a father over all the land of Egypt. He's communicating to these individuals a new way of looking at life. In other words, listen, life is just not between you and me, but recognize there is a sovereign power, a sovereign hand that is controlling all of life's events.

And He is actually communicating to them a new way of looking at life. Wonderful thing to be able to communicate that to others. That there is a sovereign God who is in control, and that there is a specific purpose that God has in every event of life.

Now I'm not speaking about our failures and our self-will and our disobedience. God can't even overrule in those things. What I'm saying is the events that come into life, even something as tragic as brothers selling Joseph for 20 pieces of silver and years spent in a prison, even all of that, Joseph says, listen, I can trace.

I can trace the hand of God. I can see what God has been doing. And it wasn't you that sent me down here.

It really was God who was in control and controlling my life. Now I don't know if you can see what that's doing. It's beginning to lift, isn't it, some of the burden of guilt from these ten brothers.

How kind Joseph is, getting them to look above their failure and sin. Yes, there's no question. They knew what they had done.

They knew their guilt. But now he's getting them to see that above all of that there was a greater control, a greater hand that was controlling all things. He was conveying to them a focus of life, a way to appreciate life and a way to appreciate what had happened so that they would recognize that God can bring good out of all of this.

Do you believe that when there's difficulty in an assembly, when there's difficulty in a family, when there's difficulty between brethren, when that issue is handled in a scriptural way, there actually can be good that comes from it. Actually can be good that comes from it. Now I'm not saying that we should go around causing problems so that we solve them and there's good.

But what I'm saying is in the inevitable difficulties of life, in the inevitable problems that occur, when they are handled in a scriptural, biblical way, good can come from it. So that the... I've used this relative to marriages. I think it's wider in its application and can be applied to assemblies.

The measure of the... I'll use the word success forgive a buzz word of business but just allow me to use that word just to convey this thought. The measure of the success of a marriage is not the absence of problems. It's how the problems are dealt with.

Because there are no two human beings that are compatible. In case you haven't learned yet and I hope it doesn't come as a surprise to people here who are engaged, there are going to be difficulties in any marriage. Differences.

And how do you resolve them? The way you resolve them has the potential to make your marriage better. The way we resolve difficulties in an assembly has the potential to make things better. The way we resolve difficulties between Christians, personally, can make a relationship better.

Doing it in a scriptural, godly way. That's what Joseph is doing here. He's communicating a whole different focus to how to view life and how to view difficulties and to realize that God can bring good out of what is happening in our lives right now.

God meant it for good. So let me hurry by reminding you also here it was a place where here was this home and in Joseph's home not just was forgiveness conveyed and not just was a focus communicated but as well, fellowship was cultivated. Fellowship was cultivated.

It was a place of communication. He talked with them. It tells us in chapter 45.

He talked with each of them. Not just that he forgave them, not just that he kissed them but the end of verse 15 says and after that his brethren talked with him. A place of communication.

Joseph is actually treating them as equals, isn't he? He's not the superior and they're the inferior. He's not the grand, magnanimous forgiver and now you are the penitent sinners that have to do a little more groveling. Forgiveness is conveyed.

Now we're all on an equal footing. Equal level. And he just talks with them in happy fellowship, in happy harmony together sensitive to their consciences and needs and he tells them so wisely because he realizes fellowship is a very fragile thing.

A very fragile thing. He says now return to your father but see that she fall not out by the way. What does that mean? We quote that sometimes as a suggested way of perhaps saying to brethren that they don't fall out.

But why would they fall out on the way? What would cause them to fall out on the way back to their father laden with all the wealth of Egypt and everything? Well, use your imagination. They're going to have some explaining to do, aren't they? They're going to have to tell their father about Joseph and Egypt and the coat and maybe a little bit of owning up to the father. And so on the way back Simeon will say to Judah Judah, I didn't want to do what you did.

I wanted to get him out and get him back to the father and you're the one that decided to sell him. And the other boys would chime in and Judah would say look, you guys were with me and you agreed with him and you can see what would happen as they would begin to feel uncomfortable having to talk to their father and Joseph says, wait a minute make sure on the way back make sure on the way back that you maintain the fellowship that I have established here together with you. See that you don't fall out arguing about how much responsibility each of you have for what happened.

Go up to my father show him what you have and just don't fall out by the way. He was concerned with their consciences concerned with their sense of guilt concerned that they maintain that unity and harmony that he had developed amongst them when they sat at his table in his home. And it's a whole other line of ministry that could be given here but let me just mention it and you'll have to develop it yourself.

What Joseph constantly keeps coming back to with the brothers is the father. The father. Because it was the one thing they had in common.

They all loved the father. So what was going to create this cohesive unity was this. Not that they were going to make compromises because they had different personalities and somehow will bury our differences but what was going to be the glue that held them all together was this.

They all, Joseph and his brothers all loved the father. So what's the first thing Joseph says when he conveys his forgiveness to them in chapter 45? He makes himself known. I am Joseph.

Doth my father yet live? First thing he says. And the last thing he says is go up to my father. And time and again he brings them back to his father, to his father because that's what they shared in common now.

He had brought them to an appreciation of love for the father. And now he's able to let them go back to their father. Time is gone.

Let me mention two other things. He conferred fresh beginnings as well upon them. Where there had been failure there would be security and support to begin afresh.

He is going to invest them with responsibility. He's going to bring them into the land and he is going to give them the best of the land. He's going to put into their hands responsibility and he is going to enable them to be useful in service in the land in which they are coming.

And not only is he going to confer fresh beginnings upon them but he's going to contribute to their fruitfulness because he gives them all of this wealth. His sufferings had amassed this wealth and he gives it to them freely. So he is going to confer fresh beginnings with them.

He's going to contribute to their fruitfulness. And so likewise in our dealings one with another there should be that fresh beginning. But let me just apply it in a practical way if I can because I think there needs to be this for us in assembly fellowship.

Not just that when a person is restored it's a fresh beginning but I think there should be that exercise on the part of older brethren to encourage younger men to bring younger men along to give responsibility just as Joseph did to his brothers to invest them, put into their hands responsibility and service for Pharaoh here. But there should be in the assembly the putting into the hands of younger men younger brethren the ability to serve and responsibility. Well I'm in that I guess I'm getting in that older age range and I know sometimes younger men wonder about older men and older men wonder about younger men and so on and so forth.

How do you, you know, the question always comes well suppose they're not ready. Well let me just tell you my own experience and I think hopefully you'll see the wisdom of what I'm going to say. I was in an assembly the assembly I'm now in in fellowship in the assembly and in a matter of a year and a half we lost the entire oversight.

There were older men they hadn't brought anyone along had given no one responsibility and in a year and a half we lost an entire generation we lost all of our overseers and suddenly we were there as young men no one ever told us what to do and if I tell you honestly that for a long while it felt like we were playing church. You know what I mean? Just playing church like little kids do sometimes when they're growing up you know, one will be the preacher and they'll sometimes have little emblems they pass around among themselves just playing church together playing meetings and for a long time it felt like you were playing meetings. No one had ever invested us with responsibility no one had ever put anything into our hands.

I would far rather right now begin to have some influence on younger men while I'm still alive. To be able to mold them and give them advice and give them help. That yeah, okay maybe they're not just perfect yet but there's the responsibility.

Be open to my advice to you as I watch you do it. Just be open to advice be open to encouragement and help. Rather have that influence now than just feel like I've got to hang on to the very bitter end and when I go well then but whoever wants to take over far better to invest.

That's what Joseph is doing he's giving them responsibility. Yeah they were not the best of boys were they? They weren't the cream of the crop necessarily they weren't the sharpest knives in the drawer to work with maybe but he gave it to them because he wanted to see them useful for God and he realized there needs to be fruitfulness from these boys and so he confers fresh beginnings he does all he can to contribute to their being fruitful in the new land in which they are gives them what his own suffering and what his own years of imprisonment and enslavement had cost freely confers it upon them that they might be fruitful in the new land in the new life they have been brought to. That's Joseph's house.

A place it was a place where the honor of his father was paramount. It was a place where heaven's character was seen. It was a place where healing for brothers who had strayed was conveyed in all of its many ways.

May the Lord help us whether we're thinking of our personal homes or whether we're thinking of our assemblies to have this kind of an attitude towards others this kind of a help one to another in our spiritual lives. Shall we speak to God in prayer?