A 02 - The Minister's Wife in the Biblical Record
THE MINISTER’S WIFE IN THE BIBLICAL RECORD
One seeking a picture of the minister’s wife in the Bible is likely to be disappointed. Only a few brief references are made to her. That she existed, however, is hardly contestable. Both Matthew and Luke refer to the mother-in-law of Peter, who was ill with a fever (Matt. 8:14; Luke 4:38). Again, Paul is rather careful to note that although he did not have a wife to escort him on his journeys, he had as much right to have one as did the other apostles, the brothers of Jesus, and Peter (I Cor, 9:5). Paul, in writ
17 18 ROLE OF MINISTER’S WIFE ing to Timothy, asserts the minister is to be “ the husband of one wife “ (I Tim. 3:2), BO qualifications of the minister’s wife are given, Paul does say that the wives of deacons are to “ be grave, not slanderers, sober, and in all” (1 Tim. 3:11).
Undoubtedly, one reason for die paucity of Biblical references to the minister’s wife is the fact that at this early period the ministry had not become “professionalized”; that is, the religious leadership of the New Testament church was essentially a lay leadership. The concept of a clearly defined ministry in which a dichotomy was made between the layman and clergyman evolved subsequent to New Testament times. Therefore, one seeking a picture of the minister’s wife must look to references in the Bible to wives in general. The same expectations would also apply to the pastor’s wife of their time. This was before the day of a double standard, with one for the minister’s wife and another for the layman’s wife. To be properly understood, the Biblical wife must be seen against the ancient agrarian Middle Eastern background, A beautiful, poetic description of this wife is given in Prov. 31:10-29. The Biblical wife was domestic. As Paul phrased it later, she ** guides the house” (I Tim. 5:14), Her primary sense of fulfillment was achieved within the home, nurturing her children, spinning, weaving, and caring for her husband. Her rewards were to see her husband honored and esteemed within the community, and observe her children grow into adulthood as godly citizens, marry, and have children. In all of this she knew she had played a vitally important role. With reference to her husband, she was a helpmate. The relationship between them was characterized by love, trust, and a mutual recognition that they both stood responsibly related to a loving God. A HISTORICAL LOOK AT THE MINISTER’S WIFE 19
Furthermore, it was a relationship in which the husband was ’the head of the house. Thus, Paul admonished young wives to “ be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands” (Titus 2:4-5). At this point Paul was giving voice to a custom, even then firmly rooted in ancient tradition. It was to persist centuries longer, down to the present day. Only within the past century or so has there been any real indication that this basic patriarchal pattern of husband-wife relationship is changing, though not without resistance. One indication of this change is the fact that few marriage ceremonies still include the word “ obey” The nature of the emerging pattern is not yet clear, though some feel it is essentially a companionate relationship. 1
Regardless of the problem presented to the modem wife by the Biblical injunction to “obey” the church historian, Kenneth Scott Latourette, after reviewing the impact of Christianity upon the family, concludes that within the first few centuries it had elevated the status of women and given new worth to childhood. 2 As noted earlier, it is evident that the early ministers married. It is also significant that voices began to be heard rather early, calling for a celibate clergy. Arguments were largely based upon Paul’s teachings relevant to the merits of celibate living. ’That he was strongly biased in favor of the celibate life can hardly be contested when one reviews I Cor, ch. 7. Verses 1 and 7 of that chapter have become much quoted: “It is well for a man not to touch a woman... I wish that all were as I myself am.” He urged the unmarried and widows to remain single. However, he admitted that he had no command of the Lord, to this effect. This was only advice. He offered two reasons 20 THE OF THE MINISTER^ WIFE for such advice. The first of was based on what he was the of Christ, which would be by a of woe and distress (1 Cor. 7:29).
In, such a time of upheaval, all ordinary institutions and relationships would be doomed for dissolution; therefore, time or concern spent on them would be wasted. His second reason is related to the first, for he argues that the unmarried state affords freedom from earthly cares and anxieties. As he phrased it: The unmarried man is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to the Lord; but the married man is anxious about worldly affairs, how to please his wife, and Ms interests are divided... 1 say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord. (I Cor. 7:32-35.), His arguments for celibacy, then, were essentially these, die return of Christ is imminent, and too much, work is yet to be done for man or woman to be encumbered with a mate* Such reasoning had nothing to do with sin and sex, as is sometimes assumed.