Judas' Despair

I do want to share a little bit of what Brother Mike shared. That whole subject of foreknowledge and predestination is a subject that's been back and forth throughout church history. And I've come to the place, well, the Bible is, and you're going to see here this morning, the Bible is a book of prophecy.

Throughout the Bible we're given God telling us what the future is. Way back in the Psalms, David, and even as I read in Zechariah, a few hundred or even a thousand years before, Judas was ever born. And God said, Judas would do this, and he would betray the Son of God.

And that does not mean that God forced Judas to do that. It simply means that God looked into the future and saw these things coming to pass. And so foreknowledge, if we have foreknowledge, we can understand what's in the future.

That doesn't mean we determine what's in the future. For example, God, when I was born, the Lord could have told you that I would have been converted at age 19. That's foreknowledge.

However, He didn't force me to be converted at age 19. I had the free will to choose to accept Jesus. And so foreknowledge is simply God looking into the future, and much of the Bible is actually God looking into the future.

The New Testament talks about the Lord Jesus returning and all the signs and things that are coming in the future. We've never seen those things before, but God is telling us ahead of time they're coming because He has understanding of the future. And so I think we can accept the fact that the Lord can tell you what's coming tomorrow in your life.

Prophets have done that. Prophets came to Paul and said, Paul, they're going to bind you in Jerusalem. You're going to be thrown into prison.

I'm going to tell you ahead of time what's happening. That doesn't mean Paul does not have a free will. He did have a free will.

He chose to go on to Jerusalem anyway, and he got bound. And so to understand the difference between free will and predestination, those are very difficult subjects, and I didn't mean to at all confuse anyone this morning of children, but I do know this, that God wants you to become a part of His kingdom, a child of His. And the Bible says in Romans 8 that when you become His child, He begins to conform you into the image of His Son.

He doesn't do that to the lost. He does it to the children of God. And those who are lost, He begins to work in them for their destruction, because He knows that they're not going to receive Him.

The Bible says, Esau, have I hated Jacob if I loved, even before they were born. That doesn't mean that God purposely chose Esau for destruction and Jacob, but God saw the future. He saw Esau rejecting Him.

He saw Jacob embracing Him. He could tell you ahead of time, I love Esau or I hate Esau because he's going to reject me. I love Jacob because he's going to receive me.

That was even before they were born. He could do that. So that's what foreknowledge does for us.

I've given this illustration. I don't mean to take a lot of time here, but I've given this illustration. I'll give it to you one more time.

Let's say we as a congregation want to have a big banquet here in Martinsburg, and maybe there's a thousand people that live in Martinsburg. And so we rent the hall over here in the Martinsburg community building. And we go out and we invite everybody.

Jesus said, who's whoever will, let him come. Everybody's invited to this great feast in heaven. And you all go out and get an invitation to everybody.

Every person in Martinsburg get an invitation. And then while we're thinking about preparing this great feast for how many people, we don't know who's coming, a prophet comes to us. And there's prophets all throughout the Bible.

Prophet comes to us and says, listen, I'm going to tell you ahead of time. I'm going to prophesy, God has revealed to me the future, and there's only going to be five people come to your event. And here's their name.

So we say, okay, if there's only five people coming and God's telling us ahead of time, we'll set up one table at the Martinsburg community building. We'll set five plates and we'll feed five people. Well, the day comes, those five people walk in and they say, whoa, whoa, whoa, I thought you invited everybody.

We did. Everybody had a free will to come. Well, then why do you only got five seats here prepared? Did you only invite us? No, we invited everybody.

But we knew ahead of time the five that would come and we prepared the table for you five because we had foreknowledge. We didn't force you to do anything. You had a free will, but we knew ahead of time and we knew the other people wouldn't come.

God knows who's coming to the party. He knew a long time ago. He's already prepared the table.

Your name's already there. He didn't force you to accept his invitation. He just knew ahead of time.

And that's what prophecy is. And so I can say this this morning that God already knows whether or not you're going to be at the marriage supper of the Lamb. He already knows it.

And we all know that. But you have the free will to choose to come or not. And so there is foreknowledge and free will.

And you'll see this here in the book of Acts as we go down through this. Let's look to Acts chapter 1. We left off here with the 120 in the upper room. And Jesus has asked them to tarry.

To tarry in this upper room. And I don't know that they understand what they're tarrying for. I don't think they understand what's coming, but they are obedient to the Lord's desire for them to tarry.

We know because hindsight is 20-20, we know that they're tarrying for the day of Pentecost and the coming of the Holy Spirit. And I've shared this before in the past, but it's a good reminder. Fifty days after the Passover in Egypt, fifty days, they came out and they came to Mount Sinai.

And Moses went up to Mount Sinai fifty days after that Passover and received the law. They saw the thunderings and the lightnings. That was fifty days after the Passover in Egypt.

God gives them the law through Moses. And Moses comes down from the mountain. Now, fifty days after the true Passover, the law is not written on tables of stone, but the Spirit of God comes and Hebrews says He writes His law on the tables of our heart.

And the Lord came down again. And as He established the old covenant and the law He gave to Moses, He establishes the new covenant. And He writes the law in our hearts.

And I didn't know this until this morning, but I was looking through some of the similarities and you could spend all day on this, but in Exodus 24-18 it says, And Moses went into the midst of a cloud. The Bible says Jesus ascended up into the cloud. He went up in the midst of a cloud and got Him up into the mount and Moses was in the mount forty days and forty nights.

It's interesting here in Acts 1 that He taught them for forty days about the Kingdom of God. So in the very same way, Jesus was taken up into the cloud, just like Moses. The children of Israel were to tarry until Moses came down.

You remember they got impatient. Moses was not coming. It's been forty days.

And they made a calf and they got impatient. Now they're to tarry and wait for the promise of the Father. So while they're in this upper room tarrying, Peter stands up and we're going to start reading in verse 15.

It's where we left off last time. We're going to go down to the end of the chapter here, Lord willing. It says, And in those days Peter stood up in the midst of the disciples and said the number of names together were about a hundred and twenty, men and brethren, this Scripture must need to have been fulfilled, which the Holy Ghost by the mouth of David spake before concerning Judas, which was guide to them that took Jesus.

For he was numbered with us and hath obtained part of this ministry. Now this man purchased a field with reward of iniquity, and falling headlong, he burst asunder in the midst, and all his bowels gushed out. And it was known unto all the dwellers of Jerusalem, insomuch as that that field is called in their proper tongue, Akedama, that is to say, the field of blood, for it is written in the book of Psalms, Let his habitation be desolate, and let no man dwell therein, and his bishopric let another take.

And so Peter is standing up here with these 120, and he's bringing up this whole issue of we had 12, and now we're down to 11. Do we need to fill this spot that Judas has lost by his transgression? So I'm going to pray. Let's spend a little time here talking about this whole thing about Judas.

And Judas was a vessel fitted for destruction. He was a betrayer. And so let's look here at Judas for a little bit.

Heavenly Father, we do want to understand and know your purposes, Lord, so we pray you'll give us an open heart and wisdom, and may the Word of God minister grace to each one of our hearts. Lord, bless the congregation here. As we hear the Word of the Lord, may you open up our hearts and give us greater thoughts and a greater understanding and speak to us as we are here in whatever position we are in life.

May you conform us more into the image of your Son, and I pray there's anyone here that is a child of destruction, Lord, that you would convict them. They could turn from their iniquity and turn from their sin and their unbelief. They could become a child of God.

Lord, bless us in Jesus' name, Amen. Alright, so Peter is standing up here and he has a testimony of the life of Judas. He was an eyewitness of Judas' life, and Judas' life, as I've already shared, was prophesied.

It was foretold. I slept underneath a fan this week and got a hoarse throat. But anyway, Judas' life is foretold.

Look at verse number 16. Men and brethren, this scripture must need to be fulfilled, which the Holy Ghost, by the mouth of David, spake before concerning Judas, which was God, to them that took Jesus. Now, the psalmist David, probably 1500 years before Judas was ever born, prophesied, because God knew ahead of time.

God foretold us what was going to happen. And so David is a prophet here. He is prophesying.

If you go down here a little bit further, in verse 24, it is written in the book of Psalms, Let his habitation be desolate, and let no man dwell therein, and his bishopric let another take. So you have God's foreknowledge, His understanding of what is coming in the future. God foreknew Judas' choices, and I believe Judas had the free will.

He could do whatever he wanted to. And he did do what he wanted to. He was a betrayer.

He didn't believe on the Lord Jesus Christ. In John chapter 6, verse 64, Jesus said this, But there are some of you that believe not, for Jesus knew from the beginning who they were that believe not, and who should betray Him. I don't know what the beginning there means.

It could mean the beginning of the beginning. It could mean the beginning where Adam and Eve started this world, but it also could mean when He chose them at the very beginning. Jesus knew.

If you had asked Him that question, although nobody ever did, Judas, is Judas for real? And Judas would have said, He is not a real child of God. I knew it from the beginning. And that is, again, an understanding of foreknowledge, having an understanding ahead of time where people will choose, what decisions they'll make.

And so I believe this with all my heart. God knows my future. Praise God for that.

He knows my future. Someone says God knows my future. He's living in it.

He's already out there. Jesus said, I am. Then I am.

I'm in the past. I'm in the future. I transcend time.

And so Jesus knew about Judas from the very beginning. And I believe Judas had free will. He had free will to choose.

But God knew that Judas would not believe. And therefore He was going to use Judas as a tool to fulfill His will. In Romans chapter 8 it says, For whom He did foreknow, them He also did predestinate.

So think about this. God foreknew, therefore He predestinated. And He predestinated them to become conformed to the image of His Son.

Speaking of the children of God, God foreknew you would make a choice to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ. And because of that free will choice of yours and His foreknowledge, He began to conform you into the image of His Son. And so the Lord Jesus knew from the beginning.

Now here's something interesting. We've talked about this in the past. But why did Jesus allow Judas to be in the midst of twelve when He knew already that Judas was an unbeliever, that Judas was going to betray them? Judas was there for a purpose.

And I read there in Zechariah, I have two staves in my hand. One stave is the stave of beauty, and one is the stave of ban. And I'm going to use these staves for my purposes, to accomplish my desire.

And so Judas here is one of those. He's an instrument that God is going to use to fulfill His will. The beauty of holiness, that's the Lord Jesus and the bonds or the bands of iniquity.

That's who Judas was. And so God wanted someone there. He wanted Judas there to fulfill His purposes.

And he was truly a tear among the weeds. And I've talked about that in the past. I believe that Jesus gave us a parable that when we go out and we begin to preach the gospel and plant churches, that the devil is going to come behind and he's going to try to plant tears amongst the wheat.

And truly Judas is one of those tears amongst the wheat. And you remember in the parable, the servants came and said, uproot that tear, get that tear out of here. And the Lord said, no, leave it there.

Wait until the harvest. And you know, if you don't know this about a tear, a tear looks just like a wheat. Until you get to the end of this growing stage, then the tear exposes itself for who it is in the harvest time, in the end.

And that's exactly what Judas did. He exposed who he really was as the end approached. You know, those disciples, I've said this before, they didn't know that Judas was an unbeliever.

They didn't know that Judas was a betrayer. As a matter of fact, at the Lord's Supper, they were all there around the table, and Jesus said, one of you is going to betray me. And the disciples began to look one to another, you know, who is it, Lord? Who is it? It's like nobody said, I know who it is.

It's Judas. Judas did not give away the fact that he was an unbeliever. He seemed to fit right in.

And I wonder when they sent him out two by two, in Matthew chapter 10, into all these cities of Israel, I wonder who Judas was teamed up with. It would be interesting. And ask that person, did you experience anything about Judas that made you think he was a betrayer? He made you think he was an unbeliever.

But there was no one who questioned Judas' spiritual condition except the Lord knew. And interestingly enough, he allowed Judas to stay in the midst. And I know that's hard for some people's theology, but there he was.

Now, I believe this. If Judas would have been an open sinner, if Judas was involved in adultery, and the brotherhood would have understood it, if Judas was involved in murder or any open sin, I think they would have dealt with it. And they would have addressed it, just like church discipline.

Judas seemed to fit in. He seemed to be one of the brethren. But the Lord knows the heart.

His sin was hidden. No one knew it. But God knew it, amen? God knows the heart of every one of us here.

And I believe there are tares among the wheat, and I've said this before, I believe there's probably tares here that the enemy has planted. Most tares don't even know they're a tare. But as we approach the harvest, as we approach the end, those tares will begin to manifest themselves just like Judas manifests himself.

In Matthew 24, it says, And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another. This same event is going to happen on a larger scale that happened to Jesus. It's going to happen to the church.

We're going to find people that are rising up in our midst that will betray us. And Judas's will pop up in many different places. They've ridden along with us all the way, and then all of a sudden when things get difficult and the harvest is very near, they're going to begin to be offended and betray each other and hate one another.

And so Judas here is left in the mix to fulfill God's purposes. He was the betrayer, and this was prophesied. And again, much of the Bible is prophesied.

But just because God prophesies that Judas is a betrayer doesn't mean that God forced Judas to be a betrayer. God allowed Judas to choose. Judas chose to betray.

One of the reasons why I believe God leaves tares amongst the wheat is to try us and to test us. You know? Jesus' life is an example for us to follow. So you watch Jesus as He is betrayed by Judas.

And watch Christians being betrayed. See how they respond. And you're going to get betrayed probably by other Christians as time goes on here.

Those who profess to be Christians are going to rise up and turn you in and betray you. The question is, are you as a child of God going to respond to them just like Jesus responded to Judas? And I believe those times are certainly coming. It's not our place to threaten them.

It's not our place to take vengeance on them. It's our place simply to ask Jesus to love them unto the end. Let me ask you another question here this morning.

I wonder, why was Judas there in his own heart? Have you ever thought about that? Why was Judas there? What was the appeal for Judas? Now, I know a lot of people think of money and covetousness, which we talked about here this morning, but Judas, when he heard the call to follow Jesus, there was no offering there as far as I know to carry the bag. That was probably given to him later on. And so Judas has chosen of his own free will to say, I'll follow Jesus.

And it wasn't a short time. It was the entire period of time, three or three and a half years. The other disciples followed him.

What was his motive? What was in his heart? Now, I believe that any Judas that's here has an ulterior motive for being here. I believe those of you who are here because you've experienced the love of God through Jesus Christ, you've experienced truly for the forgiveness of sins, you have faith in the eternity and heaven to come, you have an appreciation for the blood of Jesus, and you're here because you love him. Amen.

You love him. And if things get hard, you're still going to be here because you love him. But there are people that maybe are here that don't have that motivation.

And Judas certainly was one who had a wrong motivation. Now, there could be motivations like this. I don't know if you ever think about this, but Judas could have had family relations.

One of those other disciples, maybe multiple, could have been cousins or even brothers or some relation. And so, oh, you're going to follow Jesus? I'll come with you. A lot of people follow Jesus because that's what the family's doing.

And so my relations are going this direction. I don't want to be left out. I'll follow him too.

But they never experienced salvation. They put on a garment and they act as though everything is right. I fit in.

It could have been a family relation. It could have been simply a social group. Maybe Judas was a social friend of Peter, James, John, Bartholomew, Matthew.

These are my buddies. My buddies are being called to follow Jesus, so hey, I'll come along. That's reality, right? All my friends are in church.

I'll be there too. That's what my social group is. It could have been personal gain.

Judas could have thought, maybe there's an opportunity here for me to make a little money. He ended up getting the treasurer's spot, and he did get personal gain. But sometimes it's a girlfriend or a boyfriend.

Sometimes there's motivations to be in the family of God. I mean, I faced that way back when I was 19, 20. There's a particular girl I'm interested in.

She goes to church. I need to go to church in order to fit in, to be acceptable. I'll go to church.

I'll put on the coat. I'll act like everything's fine. So I do that for a year or two.

We get married. I better stay with my coat on. It goes 10, 15, 20, 30 years.

I got to keep my coat on. I told you this story. I was down in Georgia about 15 years ago, and I was preaching a revival meeting there, and a man responded at the invitation.

Afterwards, I prayed with him. He said, listen, I'm an imposter. He just openly said, I'm an imposter.

I said, what do you mean? He said, I've been playing this game with my wife for these last 15, 20 years. I'm not a Christian. I'm just exposing myself.

I'm a hypocrite. And he came clean that night, praise the Lord. He's an elder of the church right now.

Personal gain. You know, why are you here? Why are you in this social group here? What's the motivation, the deep motivation? It's because I want to be here because these are people here who love Jesus, who've experienced the forgiveness of their sins, who want to follow him. That's why I'm here.

Some people are here for other reasons. Well, my family wants to be here, so I'm here. Some do it for monetary gain.

I remember experiencing, you know, the insurance salesman. Churches are a good place to get insurance clients. Real estate.

A lot of people are in churches just for the monetary gain. And there are many reasons. Well, let's keep reading here.

I don't want to spend all our time here on Judas, but in verse 18, now this man purchased a field with the reward of iniquity. Falling headlong, he burst asunder in the midst, and all his bowels gushed out, and it was known unto all the dwellers of Jerusalem. In so much as that field is called in the proper tongue, akadama, that is to say, the field of blood, for it is written in the book of Psalms, let his habitation be desolate, and let no man dwell therein, and his bishopric let another take.

This is important. I just want to spend a little time here. Judas committed suicide.

A lot of people today are committing suicide. Matthew 27 says he went out and hanged himself. There's a lot of good words here.

It says in Matthew 27, he repented himself. He brought back the 30 pieces of silver. He threw them down.

He didn't want them anymore. And then it says he went out and he hanged himself. It also says, it talks about it here, he burst asunder in the midst, all his bowels gushed out.

Evidently, he got up in a tree to hang himself, put a noose around his neck, jumped out, either the branch broke, the rope broke. He broke his neck, but he fell down on probably some stones, and it burst his stomach, and it all came out. It's an awful sight.

I'd like you to turn back to this account in Matthew chapter 27. It tells us a little bit about this situation here. In Matthew 27, these are not pleasant thoughts, but I want to give you some hope.

Some of you may struggle with this. I did. And some hope here.

In Matthew 27, verse 3, it says, Then Judas, which had betrayed him when he saw that he was condemned, he was condemned, he repented himself and brought again the 30 pieces of silver to the chief priests and the elders, saying, I have sinned. These are good words, it seems like. I have sinned and I have betrayed the innocent blood.

And they said, what is that to us? Well, see thou to it. And he cast down the pieces of silver in the temple and departed and went out and hanged himself. Now, first of all, it says that Judas was condemned.

Hey, praise God, he had a conscience. This wasn't a person who was just totally without conscience. This person had a conscience.

He had somewhat of a tender conscience. He felt condemned. And you know, I think what happened was this.

Every other time that Jesus got in a pickle, every other time Jesus was surrounded, he'd get away. Remember the time they were going to throw him off the cliff? A whole crowd of them took him to the cliff and they're going to throw him off. It says then Jesus just walked through them.

And they could do nothing. And Judas has seen over the last three years that they're trying to get him. They're trying to stone him.

But every time he escapes, hey, I'll get a little money out of this thing. He'll escape again. And I'll pocket the 30 pieces of silver.

I don't know that he had the intention of seeing Jesus delivered up and crucified. But what happens is he runs this game a little too long and he delivers him up and he watches them take him and catch him. Put him on a cross.

And he's condemned. His conscience. He says, I've done something that is wrong.

All he wanted to do was make a little money and he repented. Here's the only problem. I know you all understand this, that his repentance was not towards God.

The Bible says that the sorrow of the world worketh death, but godly sorrow works salvation and deliverance. And here's a man who had sorrow. And if you've ever been in jails and visited jails, you'll find a lot of people in jail who are sorry.

Sorry they raped that person. Sorry they stole. Sorry they murdered.

They're very sorry. But their sorrow is toward this world. Their sorrow is toward all the people that think bad of them.

Their sorrow is toward the fact that they've got to spend 20 years in a prison. They sorrow. And many of them put a noose around their neck and kill them.

It leads them to death. That's the kind of sorrow that Judas had. It was not a godly sorrow.

If Judas would have said, Oh God, Oh God, I've sinned against you. Please, Lord, forgive me. You don't hear anything of that.

There was no sorrow towards God. I like what David said. David sinned.

David sinned as grievous as Judas, it seemed like. He had a man murdered. He committed adultery.

But David said, Against thee and against thee only have I sinned and done this great evil in thy sight. And David was forgiven because he had a godly sorrow. Well, it says here in Matthew verse 3 that Judas repented.

But that repentance was not towards God. Verse 5 says that he cast down the pieces of silver in the temple and departed and went out and hanged himself. Now here's something I want to stress for each one of us.

I've experienced this. And some of you may be dealing with it now. I don't know, but the idea of hopelessness.

Hopelessness. Judas was in a hopeless state. Hopelessness.

He lost his fellowship with his brothers, the 12 apostles. He lost his fellowship with Jesus. He's now cast out.

He even goes back to the Jewish leaders and says, Hey, I went back in. Here's the silver back. They cast him out.

Everybody's casting him out. He looks at life and says, I don't have any friends anymore. I'm going to be known as a betrayer for the rest of my life.

I have no belief in the future eternity. There's no hope. There's nothing to hope for.

You know, hope by definition is simply an anticipation of something in the future that's a good thing, a blessing. All of us have a hope of eternal life. We have a hope of a resurrection and we need hope.

Some of you are going through difficult times and what carries you through difficult times is a hope in the future. Things are going to get better. You know, Judas came to the place where he was hopeless.

There wasn't anything out there that was any better. You know, most people commit suicide because they have nothing positive in the future to anticipate. Some of you young people, I know what this is like, you know, you maybe have a fun time with your friends and then your mind turns to the next fun time we're going to have.

Or maybe you young people are thinking about the future and you're anticipating maybe marriage and having your own family or you're anticipating some future ministry or you're anticipating something out there in the future. You're going to get a house or a car and that anticipation is hope. You know, people who commit suicide in general have no more hope.

Life looks like empty dirt. There's nothing out there that's positive. And that was the case of Judas.

You know, we all need hope, amen? I remember reading a story of a submarine that sunk many years ago 1,000 or 2,000 feet on the bottom of an ocean and they sent some divers down in scuba gear to try to see what they could do and they morse code on the outside of the sub tried to communicate with the people on the inside of the sub and there's one thing the people on the inside wanted to know. Do you know what that was? Is there any hope? That's all we want to know. Can you give us any hope of somehow getting out of this submarine? And people, all of us need hope in some respect.

And you know the devil likes to bring us to the place in our life where we become hopeless. Hope. I've been there.

It's an awful place to be. Hopeless. Everything in life looks bad.

There's no hope. Eternity looks bad. There's no hope.

In Ephesians chapter 6, the armor of God, how to war against the wiles of the devil, one of the things that we need to do is to put on the helmet of salvation. The helmet of salvation is to protect the mind. 1 Thessalonians 5.8 says, and for a helmet the what? Hope of salvation.

That's the helmet. The hope of salvation. Do you know what protects the mind? Now, I don't know if it's going to happen to some of us, but some of us may get cast into a prison.

We may be in a dark prison. We may be chained. All our family, all our friends like John Bunyan are taken away from us.

And life seems hopeless. And the only way to get through a situation like that is to have some hope outside of this life. So they sit in a jail cell.

Like Paul, they can sing because they have a hope in eternity. And that's one thing the devil can't take away from you. He can close your world down and take everything from you, but you still have that hope out in the future.

That's actually what happened. There's a good example of that. Job, everything was taken away from him.

His wife, his family, all forsook him. Some were killed. His belongings, it was all taken away from him.

And he's sitting there with all this mess of boils and ashes. And you know what he says? He says this. This is his hope.

For I know that my Redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand in the latter day upon the earth, and though after my skin worms destroyed his body, yet in my flesh I shall see God. That was his hope. It kept him going.

Though many of us could end up in difficult times, we need to remember that even though life seems hopeless, we always have a hope outside of life. Now I want to draw something on the board here for some of you young people specifically. This here is a hope.

And in your youth, you often have a lot of hope. Young people have a lot of hope. There's a lot of things out there that they're excited about, anticipating.

Life's just beginning. But what happens is as you go through life, sin begins to darken that hope and narrow it. And people as they get older and they live in sin and bondage, that window of hope becomes very thin.

And obviously the devil takes advantage of that, but sin blinds you to hope. Sin darkens the mind. And that helmet of salvation loses hope.

And that's why many people lose or commit suicide, because they've come down here and there's no hope anymore. They've lost all hope. And outside, I don't believe in Jesus Christ.

And outside of this life, there is no hope. So they end their life. And so hope is that which protects the mind from despair.

Have you ever been in despair? I have. I went through a period of time where my mind was despairing. It's a bad place to be.

I've counseled with young people who are in despair, young people who thought they've committed the unpardonable sin. You know, that's one of the lies the devil brings to many people, because that brings people to despair. Not only does it close you off in this life, it also closes off eternity.

It's like despairing. And I've sat down with so many people who've had a girl calling me from Colorado for a number of years struggling with despair, trying to get help and counsel. And so the helmet of salvation, which is the hope of salvation, protects the mind.

Judas didn't have any hope of salvation. And he had no hope at all. Everything in this world he lost.

And there was no hope for the future. If you would turn to 2 Corinthians with me, chapter 2. 2 Corinthians, chapter 2. Here's some encouraging words for the hopeless. In 2 Corinthians, chapter 2, verse 10, it says, To whom ye forgive anything, I forgive also.

For if I forgive anything, to whom I forgive it. For your sakes forgive I it in the person of Christ. In other words, if someone repents, forgive them.

It doesn't matter what it is. Forgive them. And verse 11 says this, Lest Satan should get an advantage of us, for we are not ignorant of his devices.

One of the devices of the devil is to bring us into this hopeless state, hopeless mind. And it's certainly a tool that the devil uses. So maybe some of you have been there.

Maybe some of you in the future will end up getting there. But you always need to remember that hope is what will bring you out. Hope.

Don't let the devil close you off to having a future anticipation of something that is good, eternal. The hope of a resurrection. The hope of eternal life.

These are all hopes in the New Testament. Well, Judas had no hope. His sorrow was not towards God, but towards men.

Back to Acts chapter 1, verse 18. It says, Now this man purchased a field with the reward of iniquity. You know, he literally did purchase that field.

There are two words for field that are translated field in the Greek. One is for a large field like a farm. Go out there.

You see those fields out there where the corn and beans are. There's another word that's a smaller area. We call it a plot.

We talk about a burial plot. Judas purchased to himself a plot for his burial. How did Judas purchase it? Well, he betrayed the Lord for 30 pieces of silver.

He took those 30 pieces of silver and gave it back to the priest. The priest said, We can't take this money. It's blood money.

Let's do something different with it. They took counsel together, and they bought a field. And it was the potter's field.

And that's where they buried strangers, it said, in the potter's field. And guess who was the first burial there that Judas was? He purchased his own plot by his iniquity. And truly, the wages of sin is death.

So they took that money that he had taken for betraying Jesus, and they purchased a cemetery for people who were strangers, people who didn't have family, and they would just bury them. Here's a place out here we have a burial for. Maybe someone dies.

We don't know where they're from or who they are. We'll just put them out here. A place for strangers.

Let me read to you here. You don't have to turn there. Here again in Matthew 27, it says, And the chief priests took the silver pieces and said, It is not lawful for us to put them into the treasury, because it is the price of blood.

And they took counsel and bought with them the potter's field to bury strangers in. Wherefore, that field was called the field of blood unto this day. Then was fulfilled that which was spoken by Jeremy the prophet.

Here's another prophesy. And they took the 30 pieces of silver. How did God know that? The price of him that was valued, whom they did of the children of Israel did value, and gave them for the potter's field, as the Lord appointed me.

You know, the potter's field is also symbolic. They bought a potter's field. The potter owned the place.

What does a potter do? He goes out, he buys a field. He goes out and digs the field up. He gets clay out of the field to make his pottery.

But when he has pottery that is marred or is not good, he takes his broken pottery and dumps it there. The potter's field. That's a picture of how God just took Judas.

And that's Judas' place. He's a broken vessel. He was buried there in the potter's field.

Verse 21. Now, this is a difficult passage for me. I was talking this week with Brother David.

We were trying to figure this one out. It's something that maybe you all can give some wisdom to. I'll give you what my thought is here.

Because in this meeting, they're trying to ordain someone to take Judas' place. Verse 21, Wherefore, of these men which have accompanied with us all the time that the Lord Jesus went in and out among us, beginning from the baptism of John unto the same day that he was taken up from us, must one be ordained to be a witness with us of his resurrection. We need to fill Judas' place.

And they appointed to Joseph called Bar-Sabbath, who was surnamed Justice, and Matthias. And they prayed and said, Thou, Lord, which knowest the hearts of all men, show whether of these two thou hast chosen, that he may take part of this ministry and apostleship from which Judas, by transgression, fell, that he might go to his own place. And they gave forth their lots, and the lot fell upon Matthias, and he was numbered with the eleven apostles.

Now, I've often wondered, is this ordination a valid ordination here? Because later on, Paul is going to claim to be an apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ. I understand that there are only twelve apostles of the Lord Jesus Christ, and there are qualifications. You needed to minister with the Lord.

You needed to see the Lord in His resurrected body. There's qualifications. In this great city that you and I are going to take part in, that's mentioned in Revelation, when you get there, you're going to look at the foundations of the city, and guess what's going to be written on those foundations? The names of the twelve apostles of the Lamb.

Now, let me ask you a question. What are those names? Is Matthias one of those names, or is Paul one of those names? And that's been a difficult situation. I never really could come to the place where I understood which name is going to be there, Matthias or Paul.

Now, Paul claims to be an apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ. He actually saw Jesus there on the road to Damascus. He meets some of those requirements.

I guess we'll find the answer when we get there. Or maybe some of you have some wisdom for us here this morning, but I'd like to read a couple of verses that Paul writes, and I believe that... I mean, if I had to choose right now, I would say that... Here's my understanding. You can correct me if I'm wrong, but Jesus called his disciples to himself.

It was him personally calling them. Every one of them got a personal call. Come, follow me.

Peter, James, John, you follow me. And Paul got a personal call. The Bible says that God called Paul a chosen.

He's a chosen vessel. Here, they used a lot to determine who was going to replace Judas. In 1 Corinthians chapter 9, Paul says this, Am I not an apostle? Am I not free? Have I not seen the Lord Jesus? Are not ye my work in the Lord? If I be not an apostle unto others, I am to you.

For the seal of my apostleship are you in the Lord. Now, I understand there may be more apostles other than the 12, but I'm talking about the 12. There's a specific apostles of the Lord Jesus whose names are written on the foundation of this new city, heavenly Jerusalem, who are part of those 24 elders, the 12 sons of Jacob and the 12 disciples that sit around the throne.

Another verse, Galatians chapter 1. Paul, an apostle. I like this. That's Paul, an apostle, not of men, neither by man, but by Jesus Christ.

What's he trying to say there? Well, when Jesus spoke to Ananias to go lay His hands on Paul after Paul had met Jesus on the road to Damascus, He said to Ananias that Paul, he's a chosen vessel unto Me. And I'm not going to read all the examples, but in the letters that Paul writes, he oftentimes starts out with this. Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God.

That's 2 Corinthians, Ephesians, Colossians 1 and 2, Timothy and Titus. Paul, an apostle, not just a general apostle who has a gift, but an apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ. Now, I don't believe there are 13 of them.

So this leaves a dilemma. And maybe one of you have an answer, but it's not going to affect the way we live day to day, I'm sure. But is this God's calling here in the book of Acts? And does God say, no, Lot's as Old Testament, I'm going to call him in person.

So I'm going to meet Paul, I'm going to bring the replacement for Judas. His name is Saul of Tarsus. I'm going to set him in my cell.

I don't have the answer. And we'll open it up here in the end. Maybe some of you have some thoughts.

But most importantly this morning, I mean, let's just make sure again, my burden is that we don't sit here at Judas. Amen? That we're here because we've experienced the salvation of our soul. We're here because we appreciate and love the Lord Jesus, what He's done for us.

We're here because we're going to be around people who want to serve Him and want to live for Him. We're not here for another reason. My wife wants to be here.

My husband wants to be here. My children need to be here. I have a friend that's here.

I like this friend. I want to come to that church. I want to get married to this person.

I have some advantage by being here. What's the motive? I'll close with this here. I've said this often.

I don't know why Judas' life ended in such tragedy and he's going to have a difficult time in hell. Some people would say, well, why is Judas going to be punished so severely in hell? Because he was out preaching. He was out evidently doing miracles.

He was out serving. He was a part of those people who served and 5,000 people were fed. And he took part in so many things and now he's dead.

He's gone to hell and his judgment is going to be severe. Why is that? I'll tell you why. For three years, he walked in the midst of the greatest light that ever was.

He stood. He saw incredible things that most men have never seen. He saw it all.

He lived right there. And he said no to it. And the Bible says to whom much is given, what? Much will be required.

So Judas' mistake was to just stay in the midst. Just stay in the midst. He would have been wiser to get out of the midst.

Just been who he really was. But he made a mistake. And so walking with Jesus and the disciples, there's a lot of light.

Probably no man outside of the other 12 ever experienced so much light than that man did. He saw so much. He heard so much.

And yet, he was an unbeliever. If the light that is in thee be darkness, how great is that darkness. Amen.

So you think, well, I'll just sit and I'll ride along here and everything will be fine. I mean, I'm not like those homosexuals out there in Columbus and all that mess out there. I'm at least in here.

And yes, but you're in here, but you're getting a lot of light. Getting a lot of light. Those homosexuals aren't getting any light.

They're out there struggling to see anything. They're hopeless. So if you're getting a lot of light, you're going to be held accountable for the light.

So may God help us all. Lord, let's pray. Heavenly Father, bless the message, Lord.