In this sermon, the speaker discusses the issue of young men in today's society, referring to them as "mall waifs" who spend their time playing video games and hanging out at malls. The speaker emphasizes the importance of men working, striving, fighting, studying, and thinking. He also mentions the world's perspective on beauty and contrasts it with what the Bible says about beauty. The speaker then transitions to discussing the qualities of a godly husband, including laying down his life for his wife, having integrity and respect for her, and providing for her economically. The sermon concludes with a personal anecdote about an art exhibit the speaker visited in Lima, Peru, where he encountered a provocative image of a naked woman in a bathtub.

Okay, now we will talk a bit about the ungodly, demonic, worldly, sensual practice of dating. Just so the title is clear, just so you know where I'm coming from. It would be proper to give, to put another word, attach it on to dating. Recreational. Recreational dating. It sounds trite because it is, but that's what it is. Recreational dating. That's basically what goes on, not in the world, but in Christian spheres. Recreational dating. Dating for the fun of it. Getting into some kind of relationship just because you think you would like it. When young Christians or whatever in the church, say I hear someone's dating or something, I go, I walk up to the young guy, let's say he's 16, and I find out, you know, or the girl is 16 and there's this big class ring on her finger or something, and I walk over there and I go, hey, what's that? Well, I'm going steady. Well, congratulations, when are you going to get married? What? Yeah, when is the date? I'm not going to get married. Then what are you doing? Well, I'm with him. Why? Why? Because I want to be. And? Conversation usually ends by them storming off. Let's look at some things. Some of them will make you very mad. Let's look at some things. Statistically, we understand that most Christians, I have to put parenthesis around that because most who are called Christians are not, in a culture that considers itself Christian. Most Christians, those who identify themselves with a visible church, have had five serious relationships prior to being married. Five relationships, serious, with someone of the opposite sex. Now, let's say that physical sex is not even involved. The way we are made when we cleave to someone of the opposite sex, although I'm not going to sit here and say that you become one with every person you date, there is still the principle there of a cleaving and a uniting whenever someone, two people of the opposite sex come together in some relationship that has the hint of romantic to it, hint of companionship to it. There is a binding, a meshing, a melding in a way, a welding. And so what happens? You get to your marriage one day. And you're not whole. Because you've already given part of you to five different people. And on your marriage night, you're not alone. Those five people come with you, whether you realize it or not. And whether you realize it or not, it will affect the way you look at your wife, and the way you look at your husband. It will affect everything about your marriage more than you would dare to believe. And it was never God's intention. Nor has it ever been the practice of even secular culture. The first thing you need to realize is that dating is a modern phenomenon. I mean, you go back 150 years, forget it, you can't even find it. So we've got thousands of years of human history with absolutely no evidence of such a practice. We come to present day, we wonder why marriages have gone to seed. We wonder why there's immorality rampant everywhere, including what's called Christendom in America. And maybe we ought to just put two and two together. The last hundred years, things have gotten a lot worse. The last hundred years, dating has become prominent. Something to think about. Something to think about. Now, let's just look at the other extreme of dating, okay, for a moment. Let's look at the other extreme. A father goes out. He picks a husband for his daughter. Brings him home. And she's got to marry him. She doesn't have a choice. Now, is that biblical? Is that right? No. But let's just look at it for a moment. Let's look at the two extremes. The one extreme is got a 16-year-old daughter at home. Father goes out. Finds a husband for her. Brings him home. She's got to marry him. She's got no choice. Over on this side, we've got just the opposite. 16-year-old daughter goes out. Decides who she's going to marry or be with. Brings him home. And the father's got no choice. Now, let's look at something for a moment. The father. Let's say this is just a normal family. I mean, he's a good guy. Loves his daughter more than you could possibly imagine. When you have children one day, I know you're going to hate hearing this. I cannot even begin to describe how I love my sons. I can't even put it in my own words how much I love them and how I would die a thousand deaths for them and how it goes beyond what language can tell. Now, let's just imagine for a moment. We've got a father here who's a normal father and loves his daughter that much. Now, let's say this man is about 50. Alright? Listen, guys, girls. If you're anything like I was, you're as dumb as a rock. You really don't know what you think you know. I know you don't want to hear that, but you really don't know what you think you know. You really don't. And what you know has not come from good tutors. It's come from others just like you and the media and everything else. You don't know. One of the greatest verses in the Bible for homeschooling is this, that you should not be a companion of fools. You send your child to school, he's going to become a companion of fools. The greatest influence in his life are going to be other foolish children just like him. Where did you learn about all the things you know about romance and sex? From whom did you learn it? The Bible? Or television? And friends? And other things? All wrong. So we had a father here who's 15 years old. He's been around several times. He can see through a snake in a second. He loves his daughter more than life. He goes out, look what he's looking for. He's going to pass by a million little boys pretending to be men who know nothing about loving a woman. And he's going to at least try to find somebody out there with some sort of integrity and strength. A 16 year old girl goes out, carried away by youthful lust, by sensuality, by silliness, by foolishness, by ignorance, by her heart, which is deceitfully wicked, and brings home someone that dad has to accept. Now, if we had to choose one of these extremes, which one would you rather choose? And if you say to a 16 year old girl, you have far too much confidence in your flesh. And you are proud. And you are arrogant. And you know nothing. I told you you'd get mad at me. But now, neither one of these, in my opinion, is the way it should be. Or what I see in Scripture. Now, let's go on to something for a moment. A precursor to dating for a moment. I love to hunt. And I love to hunt with a bow and arrow. As a matter of fact, I've got my long bow in the car right now. I shot it right before I came here. People looked out the hotel windows, but none of them came out the door. Now, I have built a little bow for my 3 year old. And I've got him some cedar arrows. And what I've done is I've filed off the cedar at the tips. And I've blunted it. He can't cut himself. He can't hurt himself. Now, I'm going turkey hunting Friday. Okay, so you can all pray for me. And I'm going to use what's called a Zwicky Broadhead. They are so sharp that you use a wrench to put them on. If you even one glance at your leg, just like a blade of grass, it will slice your leg. It is sharper than a razor blade. You have to put them on with so much care, it's unbelievable. Now, I'm not going to give a Zwicky Broadhead to my little boy. He is going to have to pass many tests and go through many years before he's allowed to put something like that on the end of an arrow. It is dangerous. It's deadly. It will shoot right through a deer and keep going. You say, what's that have to do with dating? Absolutely everything. A little boy can't play with the same things, can't handle the same things a man handles. It's just wisdom. Now, along with that being able to handle it, there's a great sense of responsibility. I mean, I wouldn't put one of those Broadheads on the end of an arrow for my little boy because he might shoot me. He can't hold back his bow very long. His hand sets itself to trembling. And sometimes he's not very good at shooting. A 16-year-old boy starts dating. He has become nothing of a man. He is a little boy who wants to play the games of men and yet does not want to assume the responsibility of men. And our culture doesn't want him to either. Adolescence. It's demonic, it's unscientific, and it's based on a false evolutionary model. In all of culture, in all of time, it has been this. You are a boy, a little boy, until a certain passage of rite, a rite of passage, and you become a man. There is nothing in between. In the Aguaduna culture where I was at, it's around 12 or 13 years old. 12 or 13 years old, the boy can go out and hunt, he can build his own house, he can plow the field, he can do whatever he has to do to survive. He can take a wife if he wants. Why? Because he's assumed the responsibility of manhood. We don't have that anymore in our culture. We have little boys who at about 11 or 12 or 13 become adolescents. And they stay adolescents until they're 35. It's true. Don't be angry. It's true. It's true about my generation. It's true about your generation. When can you start thinking about a woman when you have assumed the responsibility of your own manhood? Put it this way, if dad's paying the insurance for your car, you can't. So let's look at something. When can we start off? Well, let's look at something first. The Bible says, do not awaken love before it's time. And I'm afraid that's happening every day. Because of media, because of television, because of parents who allow their children to watch things they shouldn't even watch themselves. Now, let's say that love, the notice of people of the opposite sex is awakened in the heart of a boy, the heart of a girl when she's 12, 13, when he's 12 or 13. And I know now it's far below that and that's pathetic. We rape our children's minds instead of protecting their innocence. But let's say it awakes. So it's awakened at 12. What does the modern psychologist or witch doctor, it's a good synonym, say? He says simply this. Well, it's awakened. It's time. Animal instinct. Let's go. What is it when that passion awakes in the heart of a boy or a girl? Is it God? Yes, it is. Built it in. God did. Is He signaling that it's time for them to enter into relationships? No. He's signaling to them that it's time for them to begin to prepare for manhood and womanhood so that they might someday join together with someone of the opposite sex of God's choosing. It is a signal. It is a time to prepare. My wife has a wonderful article on our website. It's called Becoming Esther. And it's about that. You see, when that awakens in the heart of a young man, the father should be there and say, Son, this is good. This was put in you by God. And it signals that now it is time for you to take serious the challenge of assuming the responsibility of manhood. And once you have done that, and I'll be by your side to train you and lead you and help you. When you've assumed the responsibility of manhood, then you can start to think about finding your manhood and pursue her with all your might, but not a moment sooner than you have achieved manhood. Now, this would be a great deterrent, wouldn't it, to all the problems? You see, here's the thing. If you no longer have to qualify before you can go through the door, man, everybody wants to go through the door. Everybody wants to participate in the party if you don't have to qualify. It's like this. Okay, I'm 16. I have not studied to be a man. I have not worked to be a man. I have not concerned myself with manly things. I have not assumed the responsibility of manhood. But I get to play. And girls, you allow it. Also, it's a great thing when you can have everything you want and you don't have to assume the responsibility for any of it. And that's what you allow. You allow Him to have you without assuming the responsibility for you. I mean, what better deal could anyone imagine? So when can a young man start thinking about entering into a relationship with someone of the opposite sex? When? When? In this way. In this way. First of all, can he assume, can he assume spiritual leadership of that girl? Can he lead her spiritually in Scripture? Spiritually with his life? That's the first thing. Secondly, there is an idea of strength and integrity and character of a man. Will he lay down his life for her? That's Ephesians chapter 5. Will he lay down his life for her? Has he gained such an integrity, such a respect, such a love for her? Does he have such a calling that this is God's calling? Such assurance that this is God's calling? That he will willingly stand in the door, face any enemy necessary in order to protect her? Can he assume, thirdly, economic care of her? Until then, young man, you have no right. You have no right. Now, if young men took this seriously, what would happen? When that light turned on, around 12 or whatever, when that light turned on, when that beat of the heart started, what would they say? It's time to get serious about manhood. About becoming a man. No more put away childish things. I no longer have time to watch Spongebob and play video games. PlayStation goes. I was once a child. I'll put away things of a child. I'll become a man and assume the responsibility that is mine. And then I will enter into this thing. Alright, well, we've got to go and I hope you come back tomorrow because it's going to get worse. And I say this to you because I wish someone had said this to me. Let's face it, most of you young men have not been raised to be men. That's the plight of our culture. The world would keep you as boys because men are dangerous. Satan knows a godly man of integrity is about the most dangerous thing on the face of the earth. Let's pray. Father, I come before You and I have struck with hard words, Lord. I pray, Lord, there is moldable clay in this room. There is the potential for men of God and women of virtue. I would pray, Lord, that You would raise up as shining lights in this twisted generation men and women of God. Husbands who love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. Fathers who love their children unspeakably. Women who consider it an honor to be a wife and an honor to be a mother. In Jesus' name, Amen. See at least some of you tomorrow. It sure is good to see you all back. I'm sorry I'm a little late. I was meeting with two guys to talk about the Losi tribe in Zambia, in the southwest part of Zambia. Some people wanting to do a work there. Just a quick review of what we talked about yesterday is that dating, as it is practiced today, recreational dating, is not at all biblical. It's very dangerous, and it results in many of the tragedies that we see today around us, the tragedies that we see in our own lives. And that there is another way. Another thing that we talked about was when a person can begin to think about someone of the opposite sex. And we discussed how when someone is around, I know it's earlier now, but let's say 12 or 13 years old, and they begin to have these emotions about some person or persons of the opposite sex, that it is not a sign from God to begin to enter into a relationship. It's a sign from God to begin to prepare to be the man of God you must be or the woman of God that you must be in order to enter into a relationship. And that stage of preparation is years in our culture. Then we went on to speak about the fact of the lie of adolescence. That it is a lie. It's based on a false evolutionary model actually. That when you look at the development of a fetus, that it seems to pass through various stages in which it looks like even different animals and such. And that we as animals go from what we would call childhood to this adolescent time when we are supposed to be rebellious and we're supposed to be struggling for our freedom and we're supposed to be doing all these things. Well, that's not seen in Scripture and it's also not seen in most cultures and most of our history. It's a recent idea. And it's done nothing but produce bad things. And the Bible said you will know things by their fruit. The fact of the matter is, because of adolescence, young men never grow up. Young women never grow up because of adolescence. You go from a boy, and no one wants to be called a boy. You go from a boy to adolescence. And that's a very safe place to be. You know you're not a man and no one's going to call you a man, but at least they're not going to call you a boy. They're going to call you an adolescent. And so it's a safe place to stay, to keep acting like a boy without receiving that title, but never really growing up. And what happens is, instead of starting to grow to maturity at the age of 12 and 13, to start really struggling and striving and learning to be a man, by the time we're 22, we're still playing PlayStation and watching SpongeBob. We never grow up. Another dangerous thing about this is no one told us that if you're not a man, you can't do man things. Because we want to do the man things, but we don't want to assume the responsibility for them. It's just like you want to have some sort of a relationship with a girl when you're 16 years old, but you're not willing nor are you able to assume the responsibility for that girl. Which makes a very dangerous thing in two ways. Gets you in a lot of trouble. Another way is, you never have to grow up. You get exactly what you want without ever having to assume the responsibility for it. And so we see in our culture, no one can deny this, young men in their 30s, 40s, on and on, that never grow up. That never grow up. We see the same thing with girls. I know yesterday I mainly harped on the guys, but we see the main thing with girls. They never really enter into a godly womanhood or a maturity. Never. Now, before we go into something a bit more positive, I want you to look at something for a moment. According to the Scriptures, it is the primary responsibility of the father to teach and mold his children. Not just his sons. His daughters. It's the primary responsibility of the father. I have ranked priorities in my life. The number one priority in my life is my wife. I'm not told in the Bible to lay down my life for the church. I'm not told in the Bible necessarily to lay down my life for my children. But I am told in Scripture to lay down my life for my wife as Christ laid down His life for the church. So my primary responsibility is my wife. Second, to my wife or my children. Third, if I have any time left over, I'll do ministry. Because what does it matter if a man gains the whole world and loses his family? Loses his wife? So my obligation is to raise two boys, to study and to heartily work because I have two boys, to work at that and raise them. That means after I come home after 10 hours in the office, getting there super early so I can come home around 5, that means as soon as I hit that door, it means no television for dad. It means no hobbies for dad. It means nothing for dad except to assume his responsibility now as a husband and as a father. And you say, well, I don't like that. Well, I'm sorry, that's manhood and that's maybe why you don't want to enter into it. No more games. No more time for me. No more anything. But dying a death to self and laying down life for my family and finding in that greater joy than I ever could being selfish. Jesus was really telling the truth when He talked about dying as the way to joy. He was telling the truth. The way to life. But here's what we have. I want us to look at our modern day academics. First of all, children by and large in Christian churches are not taught by their parents. They're not taught anything by their parents. Now, I'm not saying every case is the same, but I'm saying generally as a whole, statistically, there's almost no religious, moral teaching in the home. And the only time it might come up is when the kid has done something bad. That's when somebody will say something. But as far as systematically striving to invest your life in your children, it is simply not done. All their religious education, they're either sent to a Christian school or they are sent to Sunday school. That's why Sunday school in America is unbiblical because it's using plan B when God doesn't have a plan B. I'm not saying Sunday school is wrong. I'm saying it's wrong when the father doesn't assume his role as spiritual mentor of his children and then sends his kids off to Sunday school. God's not going to bless that. It's wrong. And you're going to take your most precious treasure and have someone else teach them? Someone you don't even know? The things about God, the most important things that will affect their eternity? And then what happens? Most kids go off to school, whether it's Christian school or public school, and they become, what Proverbs warns against, a companion of fools. You learn who has shaped your character. Now, I don't know you, so I can't judge you. But I can tell you again, statistically and generally, that youth are shaped by other youth. Who are shaped by what? Media. Media. And media just keeps going further and further and further downhill. And so, what do we have? By the time a child is 18, he's still an adolescent, or she's still an adolescent, she's had no serious training in womanhood, manhood, morals, ethics, truth of God, or anything. Because basically also, youth groups are a joke. Statistically. They're a joke. They're a place where you just get more of the same. And so then what happens? According to Scripture, in Genesis, the man does go out and pursue a wife. But it never says that about the woman. The girl is under the authority of her father until the day... Have you ever heard this statement? Her hand in marriage? That comes from something that's a Biblical practice that's practiced even in un-Biblical cultures, non-Biblical cultures. Her hand in marriage means that that girl is under the authority of her father until the day her father takes her hand and puts it in the hand of her husband. And she becomes under the headship of him. What do we have? We have a college. Any college in America or in the world. And we take a bunch of 17-year-old boys who have not been trained in manhood, the responsibility of manhood, character, integrity, seriousness of life, responsibility, anything, and we put them there all together. Unchaperoned. And then we take a group of girls and we take them out from under the headship of their father. And they've hardly ever been there because most fathers don't even take that seriously. And so they have not been trained in womanhood, the integrity of womanhood, the virtue of womanhood, the knowledge of womanhood. And they're thrown in to this cauldron of young men whose hormones are raging and who have no sense of the responsibility of biblical manhood. And you have what? A college in America which is synonymous for a meat market. Gross immorality. So on and so forth. You see, the Bible really is true. And truth really is the only thing you have. And it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to call yourself a Christian and yet live as a pagan. And there is as many pagan practices in our Christian families and in our Christian institutions as there are in the world. As one man was giving a lecture, or he actually wrote a book, part of it was on culture and it had to do with Christian music. He says, we sing just like the world, just not as good. And so we've got to realize... Someone, for example, what if you met one of your friends one day and he's just got this big, bruised, bloody spot on his forehead? You're going, what happened to you? And he goes, man, I don't know. I've had this for years. I just don't know what's going on. So you decide one day you're going to follow him around. And every time he comes to a telephone pole downtown, he beats his head ten times against it as hard as he can. And you walk up to him and go, hey, look, this is no mystery. Let me fill you in on why this is happening to you. You can say the same thing for Christianity today in America. Why is our family so messed up? Why is my life so messed up? Why don't I have peace? Why don't these relationships work? Why do I feel so empty? What? Okay, Isaiah chapter 1, there's not a sound part of you from your head to your foot. And the thing is, is Christianity is more than grabbing ahold of just some general creed. You know, jumping through a few evangelical hoops of saying, yes, I'm a sinner, yes, I believe in Jesus, and praying a prayer. It is being soundly and truly converted. Do you know that you have been? And then, it is not just staying in this babe-like form. If you are a Christian, you can't stay in a babe-like form because He who began a good work in you will finish it. And so we go into Scripture and we look at history, and we begin to see what's going on. Now, what does it mean to be a man? We spoke a little bit yesterday about the fact of you can begin to think of someone of the opposite sex when you are able to spiritually lead a person of the opposite sex. Until then, biblically, no. All girls are off limits. Don't even think about a relationship. Don't even think about drawing near to a girl because you have no right. You have not paid your dues. You have not grown up. Spiritually lead the woman. Again, as I said yesterday, also there is the idea of being her protector and the one who cares for her. Now, that doesn't mean you're muscle-bound, but that does mean you will lay down your life if you have to for her and never depart from her side. It means more than muscles, and it means more than brawn. It means integrity and character. That if she is horribly transformed or every part of her aspect changes, you're going nowhere. And then it's the idea also of being able to care for her economically. That you will leave your father and your mother. Put it this way, if dad's paying for your car insurance, you really don't have a right to be thinking about a girl. You see, once again, we want to play with man things, but we're not willing to assume the responsibility of being a man. Now, with regard to women, are they off the hook? No. And again, I want to encourage you to, if you want to, go to our website and download an article that's called Becoming Esther. When that light turns on in your heart that there are guys out there, you don't start giggling. You don't start writing notes, and you don't buy some teen magazine. You get into the Bible, and you spend years in Scripture under the discipleship possibly of a godly woman, and you grow into a woman of virtue. A godly woman who has fixed her eyes on God's purposes for her life. Now, back in the late 60s and early 70s, we decided that our culture would be taught about family, about children, and especially about boys, that we would learn everything we needed to know from feminists and homosexuals. And it has so warped our culture. It's unbelievable. It has devastated our culture. Men are no longer to act like men. A book I would recommend for some of you guys is a book called Future Men. Future Men. Although I don't agree with everything the author says, it would be a valuable book to look at. My wife says that this generation of young men, she calls them mall waifs. She says they're puny-chested, pale little boys who play video games and float around malls with flippy t-shirts on. Instead of men who work, who strive, who fight, who study, who think, they're boys who play games. And they keep playing games until they're 30. And then there's young women. What does the Bible say about beauty? You know what the world says about beauty because you're mostly influenced by what the world says about beauty, aren't you? The world tells you and shows you, and you've learned very well how to dress. Let me give you an example. One thing about art that's amazing. Art is an amazing, amazing thing. I was in Lima, Peru. This was probably six or seven years ago. And there's a famous place there in Lima called Parque Kennedy and Mia Flores where there's always art. Wonderful Peruvian artists. And there's also Municipalidad where they have exhibitions, art exhibits and things. But usually the art on the outside is better than the art that's exhibited. But I usually make my way through there and I went to see this exhibit. It was supposed to be a fantastic, phenomenal, social type thing. And I went in and all the walls were white and the entire thing was just white walls. And at the end, I spotted something that looked like a cheap Sanyo television. So I walked over there to it, and the screen was about this big. It was one of those little TVs that also have a video player in it. And I looked on the screen and it's the only thing in the entire hall. And it's a naked woman in a bathtub. She's just cut her veins and she's bleeding to death. Now, what's that have to do with all of this? Art, more than any other thing in a society, reveals to us the heart of a society. And wherever God has been rejected and the world has been embraced, you have the grotesque, you have the ugly, you have the grunge. You go to Romania. If you go out in the villages, you find these beautiful, absolutely beautiful little buildings with stone walls and just absolutely beautiful, beautiful buildings. You go into the city of Bucharest and the communists tore it all down and just put up these big, ugly, cinderblock places. The point I'm trying to make to you women is this. I want you to know what your culture has done to you. It has destroyed your femininity. It has destroyed your real beauty. It has destroyed any hope of elegance. And it has replaced it all with sensuality. Let me give you a little thing that I always teach on college campuses. Everybody gets a big kick out of it. It's this. If your clothing is a frame for your face, it's of God. If your clothing is a frame for your face, it's of God. If your clothing is a frame for your body, it is sensual and God hates it. You see, young ladies, there are women that I know that could be supermodels and if they walked in that door right now with my wife standing right beside me, I could look over there and say, Charo, look at that lady. Isn't she beautiful? Isn't she elegant? Without one problem. But there are other women who aren't half as physically beautiful as the lady I have in mind at this moment, and yet if they walked in there, I would have to turn my head immediately because it's not beauty, it's not elegance, it's not femininity coming forth from that girl. It's sensuality. And all of you know exactly what I'm talking about. Especially you guys. The difference between beauty, which is of God, elegance, which is of God, femininity, which is of God, and sensuality, which is hellish and demonic and causes a stumbling block. But that's the way your culture has taught you. But not only sensuality, ugly. Take the Victorian era with all its problems and everything else, which it didn't have quite so many problems as modern day historians would want you to know, because the modern day academic world is going to attack anything that was good. Take the beauty of the dress of the Victorian era and compare it to the grunge of modern day America. Go to Nigeria at this moment and see the dress of even the tribal women and then come back and look at the grunge of America. And you will see that when Satan begins to work and he begins to influence, he begins to destroy beauty, elegance, and all these things. And he begins to work in you so as to lower your standards so that you will accept anything that comes your way. And allow yourself to be treated in a way that is not dignified. There was a time that if a young man walked up to a girl on campus and went like this and put his arm on her or something, she would have slapped him. You don't touch me. But nowadays all the girls are just one of the boys. And it's the work of the devil. You see, what the feminist movement has done has destroyed the beauty God wants to give you. Let me give you a horrid example. If there are any youth, youth, young, it might be best for them to step out. I'm going to give you a horrid example. A few years ago, a college co-ed, a girl, was raped and sodomized by four guys. Alright? That weekend, before it happened, there was a great feminist rally on campus. And the feminists, this is what they handed out to all the girls that were there, handed out t-shirts to every one of them that said, I won't say the word, but I'll give you the definition, said, I am a female dog. That's what they handed out. I am a female dog. Well, the girl who was treated like a female dog, she had that shirt on. Now what I'm saying, those guys who did that to her, they should not only be thrown in jail, capital punishment should probably be given to them. But at the same point, do you see what's going on? Even you, if you're a part of this culture, you have dropped your standard so as to allow young men to say things to you, to treat you in such ways that are not right. And if you could go back to your grandmother's era, people would look down at you with disdain because of the way you act and the way you allow others to treat you. What I'm saying is that we have dropped the ball, we have lowered the standard. Now that can happen in the world because the world is pagan and without God, but we're supposed to be Christians, remember? Here is the great problem with our generation. I don't want to say yours, I just want to say ours. Here's the great problem. We think that in order to be relevant, we need to be like the world. Jesus said in order to be relevant, you have to be just the opposite of the world. Just the opposite. Now let me give you this illustration to show you how far we've fallen. I used it yesterday, but some of you weren't here. And it's this. What some of you wear to the beach out in public. If someone had wore the same thing 60 years ago, they would have either been thrown in a mental institution or a prison by the secular authorities. Now, whether you're mad at me or not really doesn't matter. The thing about it is you can't deny that what I'm saying is true. Go ask your grandmother. It is true. No one would have been caught dead outside. Not even the worst of the worst. But you see, we have embraced our culture in a wrong way. Now, let me give you a scenario that is all too common. A young man came to me a few years ago. He's a godly young man. I knew his fiancée. She was godly and sincere. They loved the Lord. And he's a man's man. His guy is tough as nails. And he comes into my office. He's crying. And I thought, my goodness, what's going on here? And I said, brother, what's wrong? And he says, I just can't take it anymore. I said, what do you mean? He goes, you know my fiancée. You know we desire to walk with Christ. You know we want to be pure and we want to be holy. No, we haven't had sex, but sometimes we just get alone and I don't know, in the car or somewhere and I'll hold her or I'll kiss her and then it'll go too far and we'll both feel miserable and horrid and we don't know what to do and we repent, but then again it happens again and we just don't know what to do and we're so confused. Sometimes we think it's going to destroy our relationship and we just think we ought to pull apart and we're just so messed up. Does that sound familiar to any of you? And I said, well, what do your counselors tell you to do? He said, well, you know, they told us, you know, of course we're young and this is a difficult time in our life and we need to pray and we need to read the Word and we need to struggle through this. And I said, you go back and tell your counselors. And I said, use my name. You go back and tell them they're a bunch of idiots and they need to stop counseling young people. And tell them to come talk to me. I don't know who they are, but tell them to come talk to me. And he said, but what are we supposed to do? And I looked at him and I kind of played a little game with him. I said, do you think you're more spiritual than me? And of course he was. I said, do you think you're more spiritual than me? Oh, no, brother Paul. Have you preached to thousands of people? Oh, no. Have you walked through the jungle being chased by terrorists for the cause of Christ? No, brother Paul, no. Then you're not more spiritual than me, are you? He said, no. I said, then why are you trying to do something that I would never do? He said, what do you mean? I said, look, brother, you're one of the most spiritual young men I know and you're probably far more spiritual than I am. But listen to me. And it's the illustration I gave in church the other night. I don't know what you would think, because I don't really know you, but any normal mature Christian, if there was a single woman in this church who was my age and they went over to visit her today and I was in her house making cookies with her, they would have some serious problems. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't be speaking here right now if they were biblical. I mean, they'd walk in and go, what are you doing here? And I'd go, well, isn't it obvious? I'm making cookies with this lady. Are you out of your mind? What do you mean? I've got an apron on. We're not doing anything. I'm just making cookies with her. This is not right, brother Paul. And it's extremely dangerous. And don't you know that you're tempting the Lord? Okay, now look at me. I'm 43 years old. I'm tired and my body hurts. I'm not 16. My hormones aren't raging. They're not even awake right now. And if I fell, I would destroy a wife. I would destroy two little boys. I would destroy a ministry. And there are a hundred missionaries that depend on me every day. And that would be destroyed. I've got a lot more to lose than you do. So if it's dangerous, almost unthinkable for me to be alone with a woman that's not my wife, then what makes you think it's not unthinkable, ludicrous, insane, dangerous for you to do the same thing? Let me just put it to you this way. Guys, unless the girl is your grandmother, your mother, your sister are a very, very ugly cousin. You are not to ever be alone with a girl. Let me see if you heard me right. Never to be alone with a girl. Never. Amen. You are never to be alone. And why is that? Okay, you go to Ephesians chapter 6. What does the Bible tell us? We wrestle not with flesh and blood, but powers and principalities and mites and dominions and so on and so forth. We are commanded as men to wrestle, lock arms, hand-to-hand combat with the devil. That's what the Bible says. The Bible says it doesn't run. The Bible never says for us to run. The Bible says we resist Him and He runs. We're to literally fight, lock arms with principalities and powers. God commands us to do that. But in 2 Timothy, when it comes to youthful lust, he says run. Look at that. That tells me that what's the youthful lust inside of every one of you here is more dangerous than the devil himself. You see, it's not the case of, what would you think if I'm over here praying and fasting and praying and fasting, and when I get up you say, Brother Paul, what are you praying and fasting so much about? And I say, man, I'm praying that God will give me power to go rob a bank tomorrow. You go, are you out of your mind? God doesn't give you power to do things that are outside of His will. Well, are you out of yours? Because you're praying and praying and praying that you might be holy in this relationship. You're praying that you might not fall. You're praying that you might be pure. You're praying all these things, and then you get alone with the girl. No. God's not going to give you power to disobey Him. Now, let's go back to the old timers. You know the old people over 60 who don't know anything? Why do you go to these old homes? Have you ever been to these old homes and you see these rooms that are set apart and they've got a big, usually oval opening? And they're called parlors? Do you know why those existed? For you. Really, I'm not kidding. For you. For young people who had set it upon themselves to find a mate and to be married. Yes, a parlor. Why? So that a young girl and a young guy who were courting could go in that room and they could be alone and they could talk. But there's a big opening and every once in a while, Dad passes by with a 12-gauge shotgun. So you have all the intimacy in the world to talk about all the things you want to talk. But if you touch her, he's going to blow your hand off. You say, well, I've never heard of such a thing. I know. That's why I'm telling you now. You say, this is ludicrous. Yeah, there's a lot of things about holiness that's ludicrous to a carnal mind. Most of you have already gone too far. And you know it. And this would have stopped you. And the fact of the matter is you're not going to get spiritual enough to withstand youthful lust. You've got to flee from it or fall before it. But you can't escape it unless you obey God. Unless you obey God. That's just what it comes down to. Look, I know most of you are not going to listen to me. I know most of you aren't going to hear a thing I'm saying. And I know that most of you are going to walk out of here thinking I'm the biggest dinosaur you've ever seen. And I also know that most of you are going to fall into more immorality than many of you have already. And that if you had listened, you would be much better off now than you are. Now, how do we go about this? I'm going to give you a really quick scenario. Now this is a perfect case scenario. Okay? Two young people who have godly parents, which is, you know, almost like unheard of. Here's a young man. He has been trained by his father. His father has invested his life in him. Since he was a boy, the father was working to teach him the Scriptures, to teach him wisdom, to teach him things to mold him and make him into a man. The father has sacrificed so many things. He did not climb up in the company. He was never able to buy the big bass boat. He never had any free time because he did what God told him to do. The father has made his priority, first of all, the mother of that boy and loved her with all his heart. And then second was the boy. And he gave his life for his wife and for his children. And so, here you are. You're 18. And with a father like that, you can work. You can work all day and it doesn't touch you. You don't even know what SpongeBob is. You could go and defend. You could die rightly. You can withstand things. You know things in your mind. You've studied history. You've become a man. And you begin to notice a girl. Again, perfect case scenario. She's been raised by her mother. She's been taught by her mother. Bible, Bible, Bible, Bible. The things of womanhood. The things of virtue. This girl, her mother has invested 18 years of her life. And not only that, she has a father that she's looked at and she's always said, I'm going to marry a man and he's not going to have a lower standard than my dad. I've seen the way my dad loves my mother. I'm not settling for any other thing. And so this young man, he begins to notice this girl. He begins to notice her. They take interest. You can see it. He hasn't approached her. He hasn't talked to her because that's not his right. Oh, possibly as friends or something in the community of other youth and things like that. But he's never approached her about anything about his feelings. Or will you go steady with me? Or wear my ring? He doesn't even know what that means. He goes to his father who's a godly man and he says, Dad, I see someone and I've been praying about her. And the father might stop him right there and say, Son, it's still not time. Son, there's still more for you to know. And what should the boy do? He should submit to his father. But it's possible the father's going to say, Son, I am proud of the way you have grown into a man. I know that you're able to spiritually lead. I know that you have the integrity to protect. I know that you have the ability to provide. I think this is a good thing. I know something of the girl. I know something of her family. I am in agreement. Then what happens? The father gives the boy permission to go ask the girl? No. That would be an offense against her father. He has permission to go talk to her father. Let me give you just kind of a little illustration here. Let's say that I get up. It's October 1st, first day of hunting season. And I get up. It's 3 in the morning. I go out, put on all my stuff. I'm excited. I've been scouting this big buck. And I go out to my truck, and it's gone. I'm calling the police. I mean, I'm mad as a hornet, everything else. My truck's just gone. And all of a sudden, at 10 o'clock in the morning, you come tooling up in my truck, and you go, Hey, Mr. Washer, thank you. Here's the keys. See you later. I've got a place where I bury people like you behind my barn. There's no way. That would be such an offense. Well, let me ask you something. Did you buy that truck? No. Did you do anything to keep that truck going? No. Do you have any right to touch that truck? No. Then what makes you think you have the right to touch another man's daughter? What makes you think you have the right to draw near to another man's daughter without talking to that man first? Because according to the Bible, she is under the authority of her father, and you are to honor her father. And you go to him. And you say, Sir, I'd like to have a private meeting with you. He says, Okay. You begin to talk to him. See, this is where one of the parts of manhood comes forth. Courage. Instead of sending some little boy that runs around with you to go talk to one of her little friends to find out if it's okay if you draw near, because you're not courageous enough even to approach a little girl. I told you I was going to talk mean. But you go to her father and you say, Sir, I've been praying about your daughter. I want to know if before you that is okay. I've been praying. I think she's a virtuous woman. I want to possibly proceed with a relationship. Now, the father doesn't look at the guy and say yes or no. This is the key. And fathers listen very carefully. First of all, let's say that this father knows the young man and knows him to be a young man of integrity, reputable young man, everything. The father says, Okay, young man, thank you. I'll consider it. And I'll contact you. He doesn't say, I'll ask my daughter. Why? Because the father's principal job is to protect his daughter so that his daughter never has to be confronted by another man other than himself. Sir, you do not send your wife to the door to take care of problems. You do not let another man confront your daughter. And so, you go back. And let's say that as the father, you agree. You think this guy is the best thing since sliced bread. And so you go back to your daughter and your daughter says, Dad, no. Dad should say, well, pray about it. She prays about it. She says, Dad, no. No. So Dad goes back, calls the young man, says, young man, I'd like to meet with you. He meets with him and he says, I've prayed and here's my answer. No. He doesn't say, my daughter says no. Why? Because he'll put his daughter in a conflictive relationship with another man. He says, I say no. And then when that young man says, what does your daughter say? The father answers back and says, you've just proven why I said no. Because if you were an honorable man, you would submit to my authority. He says, no. But let's say that she goes, oh, happy day, Daddy. Yes. Hallelujah. And goes in to just burst out in praise and sings the whole book of Psalms. Dad says, I want you to pray about this. Emotions are vain and dangerous. She prays about it. Father prays about it. Mom prays about it. Looks good. What happens? Dad calls a meeting with the boy and his parents. And they sit down together and begin to scope out a strategy, rules of engagement, by which these two can get to know each other without ever being left alone so as to fall under the curse of youthful lust. They're allowed to go out in groups together, in a group together, chaperoned by godly people. Most church people do not qualify. Because most church people would not honor your father and they would not honor your mother and they would say, your parents are kooks and too strict and let you go off by yourself. But a thing is set up where go over to Mom and Dad's house. There you are in the living room. You're allowed to be there three or four hours. You can talk all you want. Well, what about if we don't have any intimate contact, how are we going to know whether or not we're right for each other? You didn't learn that from God. You learned that from the devil. Well, if we don't test this out, if we don't experience it, how do we know? Look, listen to me. Sex out of wedlock is sin and it confuses the relationship. It does not make it clear. Also, the idea of live and learn, well, that's what the devil told Adam and Eve. God said, learn and live. And so the young couple begins to get to know each other, to share things with each other, so on and so forth. And what happens? Maybe they begin to realize this is not of God. This is not our desire. And it's brought apart. Or maybe they realize this really is of God. And they make it to an altar in a way that few make it to an altar. Pure. Now tomorrow we're going to deal with a not-so-perfect case scenario. What happens when you're off at college? What happens when your mom and dad really don't care about any of this? What do you do then? That's what we'll deal with tomorrow. Let's pray. Father, I come before You and I pray for these young people. And I pray blessing upon blessing, Lord, that their lives would go from light to greater light to greater light, from blessing to greater blessing, joy to greater joy, peace to greater peace, that You would prosper them. I pray for their mates, Lord, that they would be godly. I pray for every young person here that they would prepare also to be godly. I pray that their children would rise up in the gates and call them blessed and honor them. Oh God, do much more than what they can even expect. In Jesus' name, Amen. Amen. Okay, let me get through the part on... Let me finish up kind of just on some things on what we were talking about in courtship, and then we'll go on into some questions. Yesterday I gave you the perfect case scenario. If both the man and the woman, their parents, were extremely godly and aware of these things. In most cases, parents really just drop the ball on this and don't involve themselves at all in these types of things. Again, I would recommend a book, Her Hand in Marriage. I think it's by either Douglas or Nancy Wilson. Her Hand in Marriage is a wonderful book that describes some of these things that I've been talking to you about. But let's look at some less than perfect case scenarios. Let's say that the young man has gone off to college, and he's a gazillion miles away from his parents. And the young girl is also at college, a gazillion miles away from her parents and the authority of her father. And so what then? Well, it's a predicament, a great predicament. And someone could argue for and against many, many things that are involved with someone going away to college. But I think that in that case, what ought to be done is this. Once you move away from home as a Christian, you will become involved in a biblical fellowship somewhere. In that place where you are living. If you're not, you're in disobedience. And if you continue in that, it's evidence that probably you've never come to know Christ. A genuine work of salvation has never been done in your heart. If you're a genuine Christian and you leave home, you're going to find another fellowship. And in finding that fellowship, there's a thing throughout the New Testament and we don't have time to go into it, but it's pastoral authority, authority of elders. In the New Testament, there wasn't just a main pastor. In the New Testament, there were elders, a multiplicity of elders. Men who pastored the church together that shepherded the people of God. Shepherding means more than doing administration. As a matter of fact, administration is a very small part of shepherding and the pastoral work. But because our ideas of church have become so twisted, usually a church is built upon a pastor who preaches, spends a lot of time doing administration, worrying about the windows and whether or not the grass gets cut. You have a body of deacons who are acting more like elders even though they don't qualify as elders or they're not really involved in the church. And they're not doing the job of a deacon and they're not qualified to do the job of an elder and everything just kind of falls apart. But what you're supposed to have is a group of men who are called by God and gifted by God according to 1 Timothy 3 to shepherd God's people. And they're primarily to be involved in shepherding. The spiritual aspects of the church. Preaching, counseling, shepherding, not only on a congregational basis, but on an individual basis. To take care of all the other activities in the church, God has given deacons. And that's what they're to do to take all that weight off of the pastors so that the pastors can have time to do this. And what would be this? Let's say that you've moved away from home and you found somebody that you think maybe is God's wife for you. And you call your father. He's a long distance away. He can't really get as involved as he would like to. She calls her parents possibly. And the parents are too far away. Okay, so hopefully, you're in a local congregation with biblical elders who are going to get involved. And you go to your father. Yes, you call him on the phone. You even have him come down. Come down to the university or whatever. But you also have in his absence godly elders in the church to whom you're going to go and they can counsel you. And not only can they counsel you and fulfill the role of a father in a sense, but they can also set up the parameters for your courtship and set the rules down. Primarily, the main rule which is you shall never be alone with that girl until the day you marry her. And so you're allowed to get together. You're allowed to do things, but never to be concealed alone so that you might fall. That's in a less than perfect situation. Now, let me just go back with a short review because possibly there's some of you here who weren't here in the other days and you're wondering what on earth is this man talking about. The fact of the matter is the Bible teaches that we are to flee immorality. It is not a case and we are to flee youthful lust. It is not a case of whether or not you can be spiritual enough to date a girl a long time without falling. The Bible says simply you can't. The Bible says we are to flee youthful lust. And that recreational dating is totally unbiblical. It is totally wrong. The only reason you begin to think of someone of the opposite sex is because you have intentions of marrying them. And you don't even think about someone of the opposite sex until you fulfill the requirements of biblical manhood or biblical womanhood. In the case of the young man, it is this. Can you spiritually lead a woman? Can you protect a woman? Can a woman have the integrity and strength of character to do so? And can you economically take care of her? In other words, if Dad's paying your car insurance, forget about even looking at a girl. It's reaching manhood before you begin to do the things that only men are supposed to do. And then if all that has been fulfilled and you do see someone and you begin to pray about them and you think they might be the person, that it is not your right as a young man to go to that girl and ask her out on a date. No more and even less than it is for you to just come into my driveway and take my car. That girl is under the authority of her father. And if you're going to honor her father, you're going to speak to him first and get permission from him. And if he grants that permission, then parameters have to be set up in your courtship to keep you from falling, to keep you from entering into sexual and emotional activity that will cause you to be bound together in a way that you should not be bound. And this is all for your protection. Now, I heard a man say something a while back and it was very, very interesting. The way he said it was very, very funny. He was talking about setting parameters for his son and helping him through this period. And someone asked him, I said, well, don't you trust your son? And the father goes, well, no, I don't trust my son. My son knows I don't trust him. He said, well, what kind of relationship was that? He goes, I don't trust me and my son knows that. It's not a case of, don't you trust me to be alone with a girl? The answer is, God doesn't even trust you to be alone with a girl. And that's why Bill's parameters surround it and says don't do it. It's not that he doesn't love you. It's not that he doesn't care for you. And it's not that he won't entrust great things to you. He's simply saying in this certain area, no! Because you're not made in a way, well, let me put it this way. You're alone with a girl enough time that you're attracted to. You will fall. You will. Some of you already have proved that. You will. No matter how much you pray, no matter how much you fast, no matter how much you read the Word, no matter how many Christian concerts you go to, you won't remain pure. And that's why these parameters are set up and have been set up, not only by Christian people, but in several and various cultures throughout history. It is just known. You cannot do this. Now the only place where you can is a pagan culture that says it's okay to have sex at 12 with as many partners as you choose until the day you decide to get married. But you didn't learn that from Jesus. Now, first of all, we'll address for just a little while, for just a moment, questions dealing with this topic. Okay? Dealing with this topic. Okay, does anyone have a question? Yes. It's either Douglas or Nancy Wilson. You can get the book from Vision Form. I think it's Vision Form. Is it Vision Form or Veritas? Hmm? Veritas. You can get it from Veritas Press. V-E-R-I-T-A-S A lot of stuff they have on there about the family is very, very good. Theologically, I do not agree with them. They are kind of a... There's some theological things there that are kind of... especially with regard to the structure of the church, the relationship of civil government and things like that. I think they go overboard on that. But as far as the family and marriage, they've got some really good books. And on children. Yes? The people that you previously stated will be there at your wedding? Well, people who have had... Did everyone understand the question? Hear the question? The question was... Paul, you talked about the fact that if you've had a lot of relationships, then when you go to your marriage, all those people that you've had relationships with, they're kind of there with you at the wedding. They'll be involved in your marriage. And what about forgiveness and God's healing in this? Well, first of all, let's look at something. The emotional aspect of a man is just as real as the physical aspect of a man or a woman. Let's take a young boy in college who is immoral, has sex one night with the wrong person and gets AIDS. Goes to God, becomes a Christian, goes to God for forgiveness. He still has AIDS. What you need to realize is that there is healing in Jesus Christ, but here's something that your Christian culture has sold you and it's a pack of lies. That Jesus is the fix-it-all. That you can basically live any kind of life in the world, go to Jesus, and He'll fix all the scars, fix all the problems and everything. No, there are scars that you will carry with you all the days of your life. And they work as reminders. And although God can bring great healing and God can do many things, at the same time, we have to not presume upon God that, well, I can enter into these relationships and then later on God will just take care of them. No, not at all. We carry, I could say scars, I could say residue of disobedience. And it can affect our entire life. Men can fall. For example, I could fall. And if I fell, is there redemption for me? Yes. Is there hope for me? Yes. Could I still be used of God? Yes. Would it be the same? No. Would I carry it? I knew a man who was mightily used of God and saw God do things that very few men in this age have ever seen. And he fell. And years and years later, he said, it is still as bitter as gall. And so, we have to be very, very careful. Did that answer your question? Yes. That's a great question. He asked me that last night and I said, man, ask me again today so that we can talk about that. Here's the problem. Okay, if I'm not supposed to approach this girl, okay, at all, then how am I supposed to figure out whether she is even a girl that I'm supposed to be praying about? And if I do get a little close to her to see, how can I be sure that I don't get so close to her that I do create an attachment with her and it begins to cause problems? Well, first of all, one of the things that you need to see is you don't need to be into an intimate relationship with someone to know that person. Because what you're looking at, if you are a Christian, what you're looking at is virtue and character. For example, guys, let me tell you something. Girls, let me just fill you in on something, okay? If you're around a guy who smells bad, doesn't shave much, looks ratty all the time and everything else, after you marry him, do you think it's going to get better? It's going to get a thousand times worse. Okay? Because he's looking his best now. I mean, he's trying to catch you. When he's got you, it's over. That's a tendency in everyone. Alright, so what you need to realize is that if, young man, if there's a girl over there and you begin to just pray and watch her life and pray, you're going to get a better picture than if you were to draw near and say you're interested. Why? You're going to see her as she is. She's not going to portray anything before you. There's not going to be any falsehood, any fake. She doesn't know. She's just going to be who she is. It's like, you know, when a girl, you know, you see a guy that you really think is nice, but one day you get up late for a test and you run out, you know, outside of your dorm and you look like Godzilla in a dress and you've got flip flops on and your hair is going like Medusa and who do you run into? That guy. And you just want to crawl into a hole. Alright, well guys, it's good to see her like that. And if you don't draw near, you'll have a chance of studying and looking at her character. The way she deals with other people. The way she walks as far as her Christian life. Now, at the same time, guys, this is very important. Guys will get into a relationship with a girl. And after they get in that relationship with a girl, they realize this is not where I want to be. And you know what they'll do? Instead of being man about it and saying, I made a mistake, they'll blame it on God. They'll go, you know, I really like you, but I've just been praying and God's telling me this is not His will. What they do is they blame it on God. Don't do that. Don't do that. You made a mistake. Say you made a mistake. Ask for forgiveness. Now, another thing, guys, that you've got to be very careful about is this, a girl, she's not going to listen to what you say. She's going to listen. She's going to look at what you do. For example, I have known guys that they have this girl who's just their friend. I mean, their bud. And they're always just going around and everything and it's just their bud. And the guy tells her all the time, now, you know, we just study together. There's nothing romantic. I'm not interested. This is not going anywhere. We're just friends. And the girl says, of course not. But you've got to realize something. Even though you're telling her all the time that this is just friends, this is just this, and you're not interested in marriage, and you're not interested in all this stuff, but you keep coming back to her door. You keep calling her. She is not going to listen to what you're saying. She's going to respond to what you're doing and you're leading her astray even though you think you're telling her the truth. See, these are other things that get avoided when you do things the right way. The right way. Now, a guy asked me, he said, well, you know, how can I know that... And I said, well, look, if you walk by her and she throws up on your shoes, that's a pretty good clue this is not the girl. She's not that interested in you. But the idea is, you don't have to draw that close to her. You watch her. You pray about her. You know the testimony. Everyone has a testimony. You hear people talking. You can see her godliness because you have to be very, very careful. Girls, you have to be very, very careful. If you're a godly girl and somehow it gets out that you're interested in a guy and he thinks that you're really beautiful, he'll jump through hoops for a beautiful girl. He'll change the way, superficially he'll seem to change his character, he'll change his way of life and absolutely everything else until he has you. And I want to tell you something. Parents sometimes are just... I use this word when I teach parents. You're just so dumb. Just so naive. Look at what I hear. I hear this all the time, okay? This girl starts going out with a guy and he's not a Christian. And so her parents put a lot of pressure on her and maybe people in the church put pressure on her and finally she goes to him and goes, look, I can't be with you anymore because you're not a Christian and everything and it's just not right, you know, it shouldn't be unequally yoked. Man, inside of a week this guy gets converted. I've seen it happen a million times. He gets converted. And then everybody goes, okay, it's alright now. That evangelicals could have such lack of discernment is beyond me. It just tells me that a bunch of us are lost. It's not okay right now. Maybe it'll be okay after a couple of years of him walking with God and growing to be a man of God. Okay? Another question? Yes. Great question. One of the things I said is that a man needs to be able to economically care for his wife, his family. Okay, now, here's something. Because of the way our society is set up in which you go to high school, they cram in high school, they cram into four years, they cram about a year of learning. You go to college, it's basically the same thing. Fluff, it just keeps you going. So that you can't even think about functioning as a man even though you have the character of a man. You can't even hardly even think about it until you're 24. That's a problem with our culture. But here's one of the things that I think we need to look at. For example, I know a couple right now and they're both in college. They've got another year and a half. They're going to get married. Man, it's pretty slim. And they're courting right now. And I mean, his parents do help him some in his schooling and things like that. And yet, it's okay what they're doing. I think it's right in the center of God's will. Why? Because this young man and this young woman have shown, they have demonstrated in the context that they're in, their maturity. Now, the fact that their parents want to help them a little bit, and they need that help, and it allows the young man to study more so he can get out quicker and things like that, that's okay. Because they've already, in the totality of their life, they have shown maturity, and they have shown that they are headed in the right direction. Without a doubt, they're headed in the right direction. You see what I'm saying? And the guy is assumed with responsibility. He works hard and everything else. The fact of the matter is, it's just difficult. But I mean, when you look at him, you see, man, this is a man. You look at her, this is a virtuous woman. So that's what you're looking for. Any other questions?