This sermon emphasizes the importance of maintaining love, tenderness, and respect in marriage, highlighting the need for forgiveness, grace, and a renewal of love through God's intervention. It challenges individuals to seek God's help in restoring and strengthening their marriages, urging them to prioritize their relationship with God and their spouse above all else.

Great pleasure that we have Keith here this evening. Like I said, it was only what God could work out. I don't know how many phone calls were made to South Africa to try to arrange this, but their phone systems are not like in America here. A lot to be desired. And I heard, since we finally did get a hold of him, that for six weeks his phone, his fax, his email, everything was out of whack. And he had a stack of letters of people that finally thought, well, they'll try snail mail as a last resort. And they did get a hold of him that way. So we're really grateful to have him here. And like I said, he travels most of his life. When did you start preaching? When he was 22 years old. And then you got married at when, about 30? At 32. And has a lovely wife, at least from the sound on the phone. I've never met her. And she really sacrifices a lot to have him gone so much. And just grateful to have you here, Keith, and the rest of the evening's yours. Thank you. Thank you for the privilege of being here. I'm very grateful to God. And I have come to love America, to love American people. I don't think I would love America if I hadn't had the privilege of coming to the godliest of the godliest of the godliest across your land. I've been very privileged to meet many, many godly people. And I'm very grateful for the godly people I've met here. And I thank John and Lynette and their lovely family. And Phil and his dear family. I'm very, very grateful for that, too. If our lights feature isn't working, you're not going to see anything but lips on it. Where is the brother that's making the mistakes so we can make him feel bad? I don't know. Well, something's going wrong. Yes, it is. It's wrong. We may have to resort to that. Oh, it's fine now. Perhaps you put it too loud there, brother, and it just conked out a bit on the echo. So not too loud. I do know how to make people feel bad, brother, so don't worry, okay? And I don't mean to do it. That's why everyone forgives me. I am very grateful to Bea and also not only to John and Lynette and her lovely family, but also to Phil and his dear wife and family and to everyone else of you that I have had the privilege of having fellowship with. I do thank you that I could be brought back here. And I sat in the bachelor's corner tonight with four men whose wives haven't forsaken them, but they're not here with them. They've come from Indiana, and I had a lovely time fellowshipping with them. And I thank them very much for the richness of the conversation and the way I could sense their love of Christ with all their hearts. I was saying I do love America, and I honestly think I would never have wanted to come back to America if I hadn't come and met all the godly. I have just loved this land for the godly of your land. The devil might get the headlines in the newspaper of all he's doing and all his people, but God is doing great things also. And God has his people in this land. And on your knees, you can bring America back to God. God waits for his people, though. Don't doubt that. But I sense there's coming a groan in the hearts of the godly. And when you hear a groan, that's when God starts moving. And I'm beginning to hear it. For those I've been privileged to pray with across your land, a groan of despair for this land to come back to God. And I long to see your country coming back to God, and for my country. Thank you to every one of you for coming here tonight, and thank you sincerely for giving me the privilege of preaching here tonight. I wonder if we could bow in a moment of prayer, if we could just bow before our God and quieten our hearts and just trust him to visit us here tonight, each one. Our wonderful Father, we thank thee that we could have had this lovely time of fellowship and joy of sharing with each other our love for Christ and all the things Christ has done for us. We thank thee for Jesus. Oh, Father, there is nothing we can thank thee for more than thy Son. We bless thee for thy love to mankind in giving thine only begotten Son. And we thank thee for his blood that was shed for us. We thank thee that by the blood of Jesus we were saved, not only from hell and damnation and condemnation, but saved from a life of self. We could live for Christ and a purpose that's eternal, for only what's done for Christ will last. And so we bless thee for Jesus that there's something to live for, there's something to fight for, there's something to die for, because Christ has saved our souls. Oh, God, come now in thy mercy upon us and keep us under the blood of Jesus, safe from all the powers of darkness. Rebuke thou the devil thyself, Lord. Rebuke thou him away. Take his hands off this building, off this people, any influence he has on any life. Rip his hands off God. Put him to flight. All the powers and principalities of darkness put to flight by the risen, resurrected power of Christ. Come and put our enemy away, Lord, from this place. Keep us sheltered under the blood of Jesus. Surround us and this whole area with the angels of God standing with swords drawn to do battle against the powers of darkness. And come thou into heavens and come by thy Spirit, Lord. Move upon us. Visit us. Take me, Lord, in mercy. Wash me in the blood, the holy blood of Jesus Christ. I have nothing but the blood to show thee, God. There is nothing I can commend myself. There is nothing, no reason I can bring to thee as to why thou shouldest come and bless through this weak man. Other than the blood of Christ, I have nothing, God. Come, wash me in that blood now, God, through and through and through that I may have the right to preach the holy word of God. Come, fill me with the Spirit of God anew. Anoint my lips and my mind, my heart, my very being. Come, stand beside me in the pulpit of God. Come, take every heart. Take away prejudice. Take away unbelief. Take away anger. Take away hardness. Take away blindness. By the blood of Jesus and the Holy Spirit, take away everything that would hinder everyone sitting here tonight from hearing God's voice, from seeking God with the whole heart. Come, honor and bless this service for thy glory, Lord. We all ask these things in the name of Jesus the Christ, God, Savior, and Friend. In the name of Jesus the Christ. Please answer this prayer. And for his sake, Amen. There are many passages in the Bible that I have staggered over. I could take you to places that I stopped and I wasn't able to read past there for a long, long time until I just digested what God said. My conscience wouldn't allow me to read another word. So I went over and over and over and over until I felt God said, Now you have the right to read on. One of the passages, which I think you all know and love, has so much to do with why a marriage is honored by God. And Peter, the godly Peter, wrote these words in his letter, 1 Peter 3, he says, I love the word likewise in the King James. When you see the word likewise, you say, Like what? So you have to look at the chapter before to see what he starts with. And of course, he's speaking of Jesus. Likewise. So looking at the passage before, the verses before in chapter 2, verse 19, Peter says, What has this got to do with marriage, you say? Well, that's why he starts with the wives, because they're the only ones that will accept this. Oh, God has to start so often in the home with a wife. They're so precious, so able to be molded in God's hands and able to bow and be nothing, so that the home can come to God in fullness. Likewise. I do love that word. Brother, if this gives troubles, just put it over to the other one. So we're looking at what? Likewise, like who? For this is, thank we, the man for conscience toward God, endure grief, suffering wrongfully. For what glory is it when you be buffeted for your faults? He shall take it patiently. But if when you do well and suffer for it and take it patiently, this is acceptable with God. For even here unto where ye call, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example that ye should follow his steps. Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth. And when he was reviled, reviled not again. When he suffered, he threatened not, but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously. I love these words, leaving us an example that ye should follow his steps. Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth. No reason for him to be treated wrongly. No reason. But when he suffered, he threatened not. He was reviled, he reviled not again. Isn't that precious? And this aspect of Christ's likeness, God turns now. And he says in chapter three, likewise, he was, like Jesus, suffering. Not reacting, not defending himself. Or if you go back to Isaiah 53, he was just, he didn't say a word. Like a lamb at the slaughter, sheep before his shears is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth. There's no reaction, there's no defense. Can God look to a woman and say, I want this of you, my daughter. Likewise, weighs a lot when you know like who and what of him God wants in your life. Likewise, he was, be in subjection. I don't know if that word's in the dictionary anymore. You've got to go to antique book rooms, perhaps, to find that it's out of our vocabulary. Even in the church today, people don't like to hear the word subjection. He's living in the year 2001. Where's he coming from? Be in subjection to your own husbands. God says to this generation, you defy God if you don't. Likewise, he was, be in subjection to your own husbands. That if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wise, by the wise life. That's a staggering statement. While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear, whose adorning, let it not be that outward adorning of plating the hair and of wearing of gold or of putting on of apparel, but let it be the hidden man of the heart and that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God a great price. For after this manner in the old time, the holy woman also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection to their own husbands. Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose daughters ye are as long as ye do well and not afraid with any amazement, likewise ye husbands, dwell with them, remain faithful to them. Likewise ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, using your common sense that God's given you all, quickened by the Holy Spirit in its context, dwell with them according to knowledge, remain with them, faithful to them. Likewise ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife. Oh, if you don't, husbands, you defy Christ. It's not only obeying God by thou shalt not commit adultery. Do you obey God for a marriage to be God-glorifying, giving honor unto the wife? Do you? Do your children know that you honor their mother in the way you speak, giving honor unto the wife? As unto the week of Esau, as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers be not hindered. I like that little phrase, attached to marriage, that your prayers be not hindered. I think basically it's saying that if you live right, if you obey God, His commandments, in marriage, God will answer your prayers. If you are what God wants you to be toward your wife, what God wants you to be toward your husband, your prayers will be answered if you obey God. Generally that's through the whole Bible. 1 John 3 verse 20, Beloved, if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things. Beloved, if our heart condemn us not, then have we confidence toward God, and whatsoever we ask, we receive of Him, because we keep His commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in His sight. Prayer is answered when our hearts don't condemn us in the light of God's commandments. Then we come to God with such a confidence, and whatsoever we ask, we receive of Him, because we keep His commandments, even the commandments concerning marriage. But in its context, there's far more to this verse, than just that prayers will be answered, if you're right with God. In its context, there's so much more. You see, it's speaking of the prayers of a father and a mother, a husband, a wife, over their lifespan, when they pray together, it's more praying for their children than anything else. Your prayers are more for your child, if you're a saved man and woman, than anything else you pray for to God, as the children, the greatest responsibility God places in your hands, once you're married, as the children. And you will find that most of your prayers earn as true prayers from the heart, from then onwards, as husband and wife, before those children, over your life, that your prayers be not hindered. I want to read something to you, and I want you to all listen very carefully. Oh, how our prayers will be hindered, when we pray for our children, if we were not holy in our marriage. When we pray for our children, how much of it, when we're forced to pray for our children, how much of it is for God to undo the damage we've done through the influences of our lives upon our children, when we failed in front of them, when we failed in our marriage, things they witnessed. Oh, how much is to undo the damage our lives did in our children's lives. I'm not talking about the normal prayer, but when you're forced to pray, Father, how much of it is the result of your failures. How can you expect God to answer your prayers for your children to be holy? Do you pray that, Mother? When they leave and get married, do you pray that, Father? Oh, that they'll be holy and Christ-like. How can you expect God to answer your prayers for your children to be holy and utterly Christ-like, if you didn't show them that it's possible through the example of your life, even in marriage, especially in marriage, that your prayers be not hindered if you don't obey God concerning what He wants you to be, wife, what He tells you to be. It weighs a lot. I was in a town a while back. A lady asked to see me, and I was unable to see her, so they squeezed in this little time because she persisted. She came to the home where I was staying. They put me in the lounge, sat with her, and after a while, as she sat there weeping, she spoke and said, I have a daughter who married a young man, and he told us he was saved. He convinced us he's born of God. He's a Christian. And so he married my daughter, and there's been nothing but sorrow. And now he doesn't want her anymore. He wants to divorce. What can I do, she said. What am I going to do? After a while I said, Lady, could I shock you? Could I ask you, is it not possible that there's two sides to the story? Is it possible that it's not altogether his fault? You say he's not saved and you thought he was saved, but he couldn't be saved if he wants to divorce your child. Is it possible that your daughter had something to do with that he doesn't want her? Is it possible that it's not just that he's unsaved because there's problems in the marriage? Is it possible that your daughter has a lot to do with this, that he doesn't want her? It's not just him. And she sat back in shock at first, and then tears came down her face. And she said these words, yes, it is so. I didn't want to admit this, but it's her fault. But the worst part, sir, is I'm to blame. You see, I was not the example I should have been in the home to my daughter how a wife should be, how a Christian wife should be. I gave the wrong example to her. She treats her husband as I treated mine. And I only know now how unhappy my husband must have been. He had grace not to throw me out. It's my fault, sir. I gave her the wrong example of what a mother should be, what a wife should be. She's just as I was. She's just being what her mother was in marriage. Now that shocked me, what that woman said. Let your prayers be not hindered. When it comes to your children's marriages collapsing, tell me, is she like you? Is she like you, lady? What you showed her, the example. Let your prayers be not hindered. If you couldn't prove it to them in your life, oh, how hindered your prayers are going to be. For them to live the life that you couldn't prove to them is possible in marriage. I was in a town where there was this godly woman. And oh, what a woman of God she was. She stood out as a sore thumb amongst all God's people. Years went by, years and years and years. And I returned to that town. Her little children had grown up. They had children of their own. And this godly woman was old now. I stayed in the home of her daughter while I was preaching in the same town now, some 28 years later. And they brought the old godly woman down for one meal. And after the meal, when she left, I said to the daughter, you know, your mother staggered me when I was in this town many years ago. Oh, her life, her Christ-likeness, her gentleness. It's like she has no ability to be unkind. There's nothing but kindness just flowing out of her, no matter who has been spoken of, no matter who does wrong. There's just this inability to say an unkind word about anyone. And I said, oh, her life is in impact even more now. And her daughter said to me, you don't know the half, sir. My father was not a good man. My father was like an animal. My father was like a monster. We wept. The way he treated my mother, when we were girls, there came a day I grabbed my mother and screamed, let's get out of the house. God doesn't want this of you, mommy. Let's get away from him. God doesn't expect you to live like this. And our mother looked at me and my sister and said, no. When I said to God to death us two parts, for better or worse, I meant it. And my girls, I'm not leaving your father. I'm going to win into God. Your father's not a psychopath. I would be the first to flee with you. He's just unsaved. He just needs God to save his soul. And that's what I'm praying for daily through my life. But listen, girls, and listen carefully. Your father will stand before God one day. I will never stand before God to give account of anything your father did or said in this home. He will give account to God, though. He will have to give account to God. But I will never have to give account to God for anything your father's done. But I will have to give account to God for how I reacted to your father's wrong. I will have to give account to God for what I said and how I reacted to anything he did. I will have to give account. And I don't want to have to give account to God for any word I uttered, no matter what your father said or did. And this lady said to me, you know, Keith, my father did come to God through my mother's life. He had to, in the end. But we never saw her fail God once in 53 years of marriage before he died. We as girls never saw our mother once fail God, or was not utterly Christlike. And then she said these words, now we have husbands, they're saved, but they're human and they fail. But before we react when our husbands fail, we remember our mother's life. And we remember her life before we speak when our husbands fail. You see, our mother lived a life proving to us that God gives all the grace you need and no matter what your husband does, you can still be Christlike. You don't need to fail because your husband fails. We're very careful how we react to our husband's failures because of what we saw in our mother's life proving to us through the example of her life. Through the example of what we saw in her life. When I courted my wife, I had a few socks, you know. One day I wanted to write a book and all that, but one of the first socks was my future father-in-law. He's a preacher, he's a farmer, but he's known throughout our country as a preacher. He's one of the most loved preachers of the land. He sits on the tractor working out the sermons. For the next sermon he's just a preacher. And oh, thousands and thousands across our land just walk with God through his ministry and the impact of his life in preaching. A very loved man. Well, when he saw me looking at Jenny, I think he got the fright of his life. He started preaching at me, you know. And he never stopped to this day. When I see my father-in-law, I just sit down and say, Preach! He's making sure nothing goes wrong in this marriage, so he just has sermons and doesn't let me have it. All I see from my father-in-law is sermons just flowing at me, you know, that he's worked out to keep me true. Anyway, when I finally had the courage to sit down and ask him, Can I court Jenny? He sat back and he took the smile off his face and he looked at me and thought for a while. I began to tremble because I didn't think it was going to be quietness. And then he said, Keith, I want you to do me a favor. I want you to have a good look at Jenny's mommy. I want you to have a long look at my wife, my boy. How she speaks, at her values, her reactions. I want you to look at my wife, Jenny's mommy. That is what you will have in twenty years' time. Is that what you want, my boy? Will you be happy with that? Don't doubt it, Keith. And I don't want you to answer fast, I want you to think about it. And I sat back and I was shocked at that. And then I said, I think it's wonderful. I think your wife is wonderful, sir. And you look happy. So he laughed. He really laughed. And he gave me permission to court Jenny. Tell me something, can I ask all you ladies here? Are you happy? Jenny, are you happy with that if that is true? Your daughter will be like you in her marriage. The way you speak to your husband, the way you treat him. The way you conduct yourself in marriage and in that home. Are you happy with that? What she sees in you now, she's going to be that. I wonder if I could ask all you ladies, if you could just answer God on that right now. Are you happy with that? Will you please answer God? I really mean that. My daughter is going to be like me in her marriage. Oh, by the way, 20 years have passed. Jenny's daddy was right. She's just like her mother. In so many ways it's uncanny. He was right. Proverbs 30 verse 21. A shocking statement from the Bible. Listen, four things the world cannot bear. What did you say that is, sir? Four things, God says, the world cannot bear. God says. Well, I won't tell you three of them, but I'll tell you this one. And this is a shocking statement. Verse 23. An odious woman when she is married. Difficult to explain what the word odious means, but it has a lot of meaning. I would say the closest you can come to strong-willed, difficult, self-willed, difficult. The world cannot bear such a woman when she is married, God says. God says. John Wesley, one of the greatest soul winners in the history of the world. Many say the greatest soul winners in the history of our church. Wesley never could be discouraged. That was one of the most remarkable things about him. They stoned him. Wonderful things had happened, you know. Fifty men punching, and they all laid down cold. He was so short, they missed him, they knocked each other up. Tragic incidents that happened, but they ran him out of the town. They threw him over a cliff. He just flew through the air, you know. They left him for dead. They threw stones on this man. Even the king of England had to step in to stop and say, this has to stop, this treatment of Wesley and his followers. This cannot go on, all the stoning. Well, the king stepped in, and it started to slow down. But nothing discouraged Wesley. They say he got up and he laughed, and he walked back into the south. Nothing could discourage him. Nothing could just make him despondent. I wish I could be like that. One thing, only one thing, brought Wesley to despair in his godliness. Do you know what that was? His wife. No one judged him. It wasn't his choice of marriage. The only thing that drove that man, one of the godliest men that ever lived, that no one would ever put a question mark on his testimony, was walk with God. Was his wife was not godly. Was not Christlike. Tell me, are you a Sarah? Ladies, are you like Sarah? The only example God gives in this whole passage about marriage is the woman, the one woman he mentions, Sarah. Are you like Sarah? In God's eyes and man's eyes, in your marriage? Or are you like the woman that God says the earth cannot bear once she's married? Cannot bear. What happens when she's married? God says. What are you like? Quite a question to ask you. You're all Christians here tonight. David's wife despised him. He was a man after God's own heart, you know. It's possible that a man after God's own heart can have a wife that hates him, God says. You know that's possible. She despised him as he danced after the great victory. It wasn't the dance that made her, it was despising in her heart. Of course it was the influence of her father. Not everybody has the cross to bear of having a father-in-law like Saul or David. Saul just lived to destroy David. I wonder if I can just speak for a moment yet to fathers and mothers-in-law. Broaden this out a bit. Tell me, do you live to destroy your son? Do you know how many Christian marriages are destroyed by their in-laws? Interfering. You may not throw a spear at him, but there are other spears to throw, you know. Words, unkind words, undermining him. I can take you in America to Christian homes where the in-laws were the reason the marriage ended in divorce. They so hated their son-in-law, mainly because he was going through with God all the way. Tragic. Just for a moment, I just hope there's no Saul's here tonight. How do you treat your David? It's possible for you to find a woman so hating her husband, for many reasons, for many reasons. I was once in a convention preaching and this man and lady came over to sit with me while we were having a meal and they were talking about God, all the things of the things of God, the church, the state of the church, the things of the convention, just on a spiritual level. I hadn't seen them for many years and this little girl ran up, pretty little girly, and she looked at me standing with her mommy and daddy and they said, this is our daughter. And I said, oh my, the last time I saw you, you were a little baby in your mommy's arms. So the mommy said, this is the man who's preached, standing preaching and telling us how to live right with God. This little girl looked at me, she looked at her mommy and daddy for a while and just stood there looking at her. And she said, preacher, my mommy and daddy always fight. Well, I looked through the corner of my eye at mommy and daddy and their mouths fell open. They always fight, she says. My mommy every night cries and weeps and weeps and cries and daddy screams and mommy screams. You must speak to them. Help them. Well, I looked at this little girl, you know, I could have been cruel and turned and rebuked that mother and father, but I was also in a test. You have no right to ever be cruel. Look at who fails. So I prayed. And I said, little girlie, you are so beautiful. I'm sure your mommy and daddy love you so much. And I know God loves your mommy and daddy. I know that they love him. And I know they want him to have his way in their life. And I know God is going to help them to be happy. You know, I got up and walked away. I didn't talk to them. I just looked at that rather than to confront them. Who's to blame in a Christian marriage where there's just fighting all the time? You may say it doesn't happen. It does happen. It does happen. It happens so much it's unbelievable. Because you're a Christian doesn't mean to say you're going to have a happy marriage. Oh, no, no. I want to ask every one of you here tonight, how is your marriage in the light of God's word? Where does love turn to hate in a Christian marriage? Why does love leave a Christian marriage? Who's to blame when the sweetness turns to sour? When I was a little boy, I was unsaved, so was my parents. And my parents had friends, beautiful lady, and they would always have time of socializing together with this other married couple. But what was so different about this married couple was the way they spoke to each other. They were very much in love. They called each other by these wonderful names, you know, sweetness and dewdrop, and sunshine and honey pie and all sorts of amazing extreme statements of their love to each other. But it was always these lovely names flowing, you know. And, of course, Mommy and Daddy couldn't resist the temptation to joke a little bit about at home, sweetness and honey pie, rainbow, that's the other one, rainbow. Wow, they were in love. Anyway, the years went by, and one day Daddy came home and said, you know, something's going wrong with that home. I'm worried. So Mommy says, why? So Daddy says, it's the same words but it's a different tone. He says, she says, sweetness, you know, and dewdrop, and wow. That is a bit flabbergasting, isn't it, that words like that can, just through the change of tone, change meaning. I'd like to ask everyone here tonight, and I want to ask you very, very carefully, has the tone changed in the way you speak to your wife, sir? Has the tenderness gone in the way you speak to your husband and lady? You're Christians. You say you serve God. Do you still love your wife, sir? Do you still speak with such tenderness? Thank you. I want you to be utterly honest there now. I was in a German's home. Germans are very different. I suppose coming from Mennonite background, you might have a lot of German background here. But this German man really was something different. We sat at the table eating a meal with him and his wife. Tante Martha was her name. Tante means auntie in our country, in our language. And he would speak, you know. He was saved. She was saved. But he was older, and he would speak about all the different preachers that he knew from the movement that I came from and the years that had gone by and the things that have happened. And after a long time of him speaking, suddenly Tante Martha decided just to say something. And this German man sat back, you know, and his eyes went. Just a little statement she dared to make, he said, Martha! So I looked at him and I looked at her. That was, you know, he sort of like just undermined what she says, that she got the wrong side of it. So he carried on speaking, and after a while she dared to say something, and he said, Oh, Martha! So I got a bit uncomfortable, you know. After a while, anything she said. I think the third time was the worst. Martha! And I sat there and thought, Can't she say anything? Can't she say anything? There must have been a time there was tenderness in that man toward that woman. There must have been a time when she was able to be a human. Her opinion meant a lot to him. There must have been a moment where her conversation was not buried when she opened her mouth as nothing. How does it happen in a Christian home that even your wife's opinion becomes something that makes you get irritated? Where did the tenderness, when did the tone change, sir, in the way you spoke to her, in the way you spoke to him, lady? That's an extreme case. Tell me, does your wife, do you give her a chance to be a person anymore? Her opinion? Do you honor your wife, sir, anymore? Does she know she's honored Do the people who walk into your home know she's honored? You know, I can tell you how holy a man is by the way he speaks to his wife. Don't doubt that now. I guarantee you, I can tell you how holy a man is by the way he speaks to his wife, full stop. I don't need anything else. And God knows how many things and incidents happened to make me convinced that the statement I'm making now is the truth. How holy are you, sir, in your marriage? Well, just look at how you speak to your wife, that's how holy you are. Full stop. Don't doubt it. Don't doubt it. It doesn't work in the home. It doesn't work anywhere. If she's un-Christ-like, and you're un-Christ-like, that doesn't mean that you are right with God. When I thought of Uncle, oh, I nearly said his name, with Aunt Marta, Paul says, I suffer not a woman to speak in the church. I forbid for a woman to never keep silence in the church. But I think many men take it and interpret it. The woman should never speak at all. In the home, she must be in silence. Many Christian men honestly treat their wives that I suffer not a woman to speak. Full stop. That's a tragedy. When did love leave your heart, sir? And did the way you speak betray that your condition with God means you betrayed God and defied God's commandment to love your wives, to be not bitter against them, to love them as Christ loved the church? Oh, my, what a commandment. Do you? Do you? Well, doesn't it matter that God expects that of you? I met a preacher once, a very well-known preacher. When he heard I was getting married, he walked along the beach front with me on the sand, the shores of the sea, down there where we were preaching. And he was a very revered and wonderful preacher. But he said, Keith, can I give you some advice? You're getting married to Jenny. Can I give you some advice, boy? Don't ever allow yourself to say an unkind word. You don't have to. You can never take it back once it's said. Guard your lips from unkind words, Keith, no matter how much stress comes on you. Run out of the door before you answer rather than say an unkind word. Because once unkind words start in a marriage, it's almost impossible to get back the tenderness. It's only unkind words that you allow that take away the tenderness in a Christian marriage. And you don't have to say them. You don't have to say those words. I looked at him, and he began to weep for a while, and I wondered about his marriage. One of the great names in our country as a preacher, I had some people that had come to God through my ministry that left their work to go and work for him to serve God in this man's ministry. He's such an impact. And one day I said to them, as I visited them after a few years, it's a great privilege God's given you to be with this man. And there was silence. He said, it's not a privilege, Keith. Do you know why? The way he speaks to his wife. No one, no one that works for him can tolerate sitting under his messages. You can't listen to him preach when you hear how he speaks to his wife. You can be a preacher, and people who hear the way you speak to your wife will never be able to listen to you preach again. One conversation between you and your wife in the pulpit just once will destroy your right to ever preach again. Preacher, you're as real as you are in your home, sir. Lady, don't doubt that. Don't doubt it. I have an uncle, Roy. We named our second child after him, and I joked with my wife after about two years of marriage, I actually joked. My jokes were never good, by the way. I was told that very, very emphatically from, I won't tell you who. But I remember joking with my wife, and it was just a joke. My uncle Roy stood up and he began to weep. Within a few seconds, the tears, he walked over and he said, Don't you ever speak to Jenny like that again, boy. Don't you ever speak to your wife like that again, Keith. And I stood up and I started weeping within seconds because Uncle Roy just didn't weep. And I said, Uncle Roy, it was a joke. I was joking. Is it wrong to joke? He said, My boy, even in a joke, you don't speak disrespectfully to your wife, Keith. You and Jenny have something so unique and beautiful. I will not allow you to lose it. I will not allow you, my boy, to lose it. You will never speak to Jenny like that again, not even in a joke. You respect her, boy. I said to my Uncle Roy, Uncle Roy, I accept that from God. And I never, ever, ever even joked disrespectfully in words to my wife again. Guard your words, Keith. Once you've said unkind words, you can't undo the damage. And the tenderness is gone. It's almost impossible to get back that tenderness. Guard your words, boy. I love Abraham, you know. You know what I like about Abraham? Oh, you can say what your wonderful thing of Abraham is. My father-in-law's favorite topic in sermons is Abraham. I've heard about a hundred sermons on Abraham from my daddy, my father-in-law. But one of the things I like about Abraham is that he's sported with his wife. Do you like that? A lot of people don't like to hear such a word, Abraham. What I like about Abraham sporting with Sarah, you know, he was old when he was doing that. Don't you know that? The old king was looking out, this big old fellow looking out the window, and he said, That's not her, brother. No brother would sport like that. That was the end of him. But I loved Abraham for that. I thought, wow, you know, he wasn't young, by the way. You look it out. He was old, wasn't he, when he had babies and children that he was old. He was still sporting with his dear souls. He was nothing but very beautiful, I think. I look at some of you people here and wonder, How is it possible you don't have a wrinkle in your face when I first realized your age? There's something wonderful about walking with God, you know. And Sarah was the one example God gave of what a wife should be. No wonder she kept her beauty. Something so beautiful about her, but oh, he loved her. He was sporting with her in his old age. And I liked that. I don't think it's spiritual to say things like that shouldn't be spoken of or talked of, you know. I was staying in Ohio. Better be careful now. And I was preaching, and they put me in the home of this dear old soul. I mean, they're old. They were really old. They should have been in frail care home, but they had their own home, and they were happy, and they put me in this home with these dear folk, and I hope they're not here tonight, or then I'm in trouble. I don't know what I'll do here tonight if you're here. Don't tell me, please. Just spare me. But my word, I soon sensed these two loved each other. They had been married and so many children, all grown up in the grand church, but the tenderness and the gentleness and the genuine respect to every word he said to her and every word she said to him. There was no show. There was this love. It was just amazing. I just sat there bewildered at times that there was such genuine tenderness and love in every word and warmth and the gentleness, the thrill in his eyes when she walked in the room. He got excited. I dared to come down ten minutes early one night. They used to take me to the church where I was preaching there in Ohio, and so I was supposed to come down at a certain time. I was supposed to be preparing at the last minute, preparing how to preach. I came down the stairs ten minutes early. I should never have done that. And this dear old soul, he was standing there with his wife, but they were kissing. Now, forgive me for saying this. I've never seen young people kiss like that. You might be shocked. I was shocked. Now, how was I to get out of this? I was at the bottom of the steps, and I looked, and I thought, should I get up the steps, you know, and I thought they might creak, so I stood there, and I tried to shut my eyes, you know. I was sold, but I peeped every now and again. Scared to breathe. Well, eventually they knew I was there, and there was a lot of giggling and amazing. I won't tell you how old these people are. You won't believe how old they are. They're in love. But you know what? I prayed. I found myself praying, God, please, let me love my wife like this when we're old. When did love leave the door, Sarah? Does old age demand you stop loving? She feels beautiful. She gets you all thrilled when she walks in the door. Did God not want, from the way Sarah submitted herself to him, with such love, that this man loved her into his old age. It was nothing because of the way she obeyed God. She became the example of the believers that God said, be like Sarah. And the way Abraham must have honored her, and honored her, and honored every word he uttered to her, every reaction honoring her, that love was kept intact, kept alive into old age, and sporting with her. You can only do that if you really love one another, each other, with a real love. Do you still love your wife, sir? What's left of life, sir? Are you going to let it be what James told me, tenderness is gone, the gentleness, the warmth, the honor, the thrill of being with her, of loving her, cherishing her. And you lady, I do so hope that Jenny will have the privilege of being married to a man when he's old, like that woman was. I feel sorry for Jenny. I'm not going to, by God's grace, I think that makes marriage holy, sir, not stale respectability. It's more a soul, but empty in tenderness. I think holiness is soul, throbbing with love in marriage. That's holiness. What do you honestly think holiness is in marriage, if love went out the door? Well, to everyone here who has a need to ask God to heal the wounds that somehow have come in, to bring back the tenderness and the words, to give forgiveness to each other, to every single married person here tonight. You may think you've shocked the world by saying it's me. I'll tell you something, with no one, it would be more shock than the devil if you let God undo in one moment all the damage he's somehow done so subtly. To ask for forgiveness, for cleansing in the blood, and for God's grace by the Holy Spirit to give you back love and tenderness and peace and gentleness and warmth and honoring in your marriage. To ask God to take the little bit left and make it holiness, like Sarah and Abraham were, like that old couple in Ohio down here. To believe with all your heart that God's great enough to still do that, if you really ask Him, and you're willing to obey Him and be what He wants you to be. And to ask God to give grace to the one, to your spouse, to give you another chance and love you the same, no matter how much you fail. I'm going to suck you all now. Who makes an appeal like this that I'm going to dare? I want everyone, whether you're a preacher, whether you've been married 50 years and you're from a holiness church, whether the Mennonites think, oh, you're the godliest couple alive. I want every one of you to know you need to say, God, God, I need forgiveness and God, I need the blood because of my marriage. And God, I ask for grace, what's left of it to be what I should be. By a miracle of the Holy Spirit in my heart, make me what I should be. Please, every one of you that desperately need to say that to God, I want you to stand up right now and say, God, it's me. And those that stand, I'm going to pray for you. Oh, it's going to cost you to stand, isn't it? But imagine what it's going to cost you if you don't stand and you just carry on keeping the front. I won't ask you again. Just those that are standing and those that still want to stand, let's just pray now. Will you all pray with me, please, this prayer? Oh, God, forgive me for how I failed Thee in my marriage. Wash me in the blood of Christ for every grief I have given Thee and my loved one. When I was not utterly Christlike as I could have been if I just let Thee have my way. By Thy grace, give me a new start here tonight. That what is left of my life, I may be holy in my marriage. I may love my wife. I may love my husband with God's love. Help my spouse to forgive me and to give me another chance. As I try again, wash me through and through in the blood of Jesus. Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a right spirit within me. Fill me now with Thy Holy Spirit. Let the fruit of the Spirit be seen in my life. No matter how trying the circumstances, spontaneous, reacting, especially toward my wife and my husband. Make our marriage beautiful, God. In Jesus Christ's name, for His sake. Amen. Can we all stand, please, those that are seated? I asked God for a sermon flying over here in the airplane, and this is the one He gave me. Thank you for accepting it from God and not from man. Thank you. God will honor you with your marriage above that you are asking. Don't doubt that. He delights to do that, you know. He delights to answer above that you ask Him. If you ask Him from your heart, sir, tonight, I guarantee you this God will be obliged in His holiness and integrity to work this out now in your life. The one wonderful thing about when God meets with you is that to maintain it, you only have to do one thing, to never lose anything God does for you. Never miss God in the morning and the night. It's the only way you will maintain now what God has done in your heart. Never let anything in your day be more vital or precious to you in life, any day that you live till the day you die than meeting with God in the morning and the night. The amount of time you give Him, the way you spend your time with Him, and what you've asked God to do tonight, and I know He's done, never be lost. I guarantee, I can't guarantee you much, but I guarantee you when God visits the heart, the only reason you could lose ground from that moment and fall back into failure is if you neglect God in the morning and the night. It is impossible to backslide if you never, ever miss God in the morning and the night. But now this thing of marriage, the quiet time keeps you intact, sir and lady. You walk out of that time with God, and the Christ-likeness that comes is the result of the time you were with God. Don't neglect God. And do yourself a wonderful honor, sir. I don't know how long it's been that you put your arms around your wife and said, I love you. Do that tonight. You have no idea how much a lady needs that. I'm going to be preaching down in New York from Tuesday through to Sunday. Please pray for me. Some convention they've had for about 80 years, I believe. I'll be very grateful for your prayers. And by God's grace, I hope to come back to you in November, October, November. I don't know how many of you know dear brother Phil, and John, and Annette, and the others here. The one minister that I so love, what's his name again? Spade? What a dear man's name. Summers. Oh, the old adornments, old age, time forgetting things. That dear man, amen. What a testimony. Wow, you wanted to really be through it. We could start right now with this testimony. I wish everybody said, let's do it, you know. I'm living for the day. Anyway, 12 o'clock, preached. Paul preached till people fell down dead, you know. Nobody's done that under my ministry yet, but I love to preach a long time. And I am very grateful to God that I could have preached here tonight. But if it is God's will, and I don't doubt it, but if God spares me and God spares you, and if he doesn't come back to take us home, I hope so much God will let me come back to you. And our dear brother has expressed that perhaps there's the hope of bringing my family over here. I don't want to twist his arm or take advantage of that, that offer, but if it is so, then my family will be here with me, and you will see why I'm happy. You will see how rich I am. I don't know anyone living that is more Christlike than my wife. I don't know anyone. I hope you can say that about your wife, sir. I'm so grateful I can say it about my wife. From my heart, I thank God she's the mother of my children. I thank God they're so privileged to have that mother. Now I'm going to ask John to please come forward. Would you mind if I do this? I don't know whether to ask Phil or anyone, but I'm going to ask John because of just the involvement I've had with him and Lynette, and I'm going to ask him to commit us all to Christ. Could I ask one staggering thing in him? You've got to forgive me for asking. I'd say that if you're not born of God, you cannot point to the moment you became God's child. It couldn't happen when you were born a child of your mother and father. That's why you have to be born again. You have to be born again. You have to have a second birth, and you can't do it as a child. It's by grace. If you're not saying, Oh, please, please come to Jesus. Don't go to sleep tonight before you've taken someone who brought you. Say, don't leave me until you help me to find Jesus. I beg you to do it. I don't want to know further from you, but will you learn how to say thank you properly to the very person who has loved you so? I thank you sincerely from my heart, and I hope I'm saying it correctly. God honor you for that. My payment was the privilege of being able to preach to you. If God lays this in your heart, I'm so grateful. I honestly ask God to honor you. Can our brother commit us to Christ? I don't think I'm going to stand in the door, because we have grown enough, you know, to say goodbyes to someone, because that means it's just too good to say something. Let's bow. Heavenly Father, thank you for this evening, and thanks for speaking to my heart, Lord. Help me to go away as a different husband and father. Just thanks for this evening, and thank you, Lord, for working it out that each one could be here. Just help us to go home, purpose in our hearts to be more godly and more like the Lord Jesus Christ. Please keep your hedge of protection over each one as they travel home. Bless each one. Help us all to be faithful to you in one day. Hear you say, well done, good and faithful. Thank you, dear Lord, for this evening. Bless Keith and his family back home. Just give them an extra measure of grace tonight, Lord, as they go to bed many evenings without husband or father there. Just bless them right now, Lord. Just commit the rest of this evening into your hands. In Jesus' name, amen. Thank you all for coming. God bless you. Don't forget the announcements we made earlier. And if you have any questions, feel free to ask somebody on the committee. God bless you. You've got an announcement. Mark reminded me the staff here, they like to get this place cleaned up. We do not want to rush you. So we're going to open these doors up, and maybe if we can kind of move over into that section, that way they can do what they need to do. So we want to encourage you to fellowship, but let's appreciate Amish Door and their flexibility to stay a little later than normal, and we can help them in that way.