In this sermon, the preacher addresses the issue of the generation gap in the church and how it manifests from one generation to the next. He emphasizes the importance of communication and relationship between fathers and children, and children and fathers. The preacher encourages parents to acknowledge their need for guidance and to actively build a strong relationship with their young people. He also emphasizes the value of time in building relationships and suggests having family meetings as a way to address and bridge the generation gap. The sermon references Malachi 4:6, which speaks about turning the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers.

Hello, this is Brother Denny. Welcome to Charity Ministries. Our desire is that your life would be blessed and changed by this message. This message is not copyrighted and is not to be bought or sold. You are welcome to make copies for your friends and neighbors. If you would like additional messages, please go to our website for a complete listing at www.charityministries.org. If you would like a catalog of other sermons, please call 1-800-227-7902 or write to Charity Ministries, 400 West Main Street, Suite 1, Efropie, 17522. These messages are offered to all without charge by the free will offerings of God's people. A special thank you to all who support this ministry. Well, we're a rich people. I was talking to Brother Klaus last evening. He's here from Holland this morning. He said, I wonder if the people know what they have here. I wonder that too, many times. I wonder if we know what we have here. It's been a blessed service already. God has just packed it full. I'm sure you would all agree, we're already full. We can go home. With all that God has given to us and shed upon us, we're already full. I'm looking for my wife. She said she was going to be sitting right there. She said, don't forget to smile at me this morning. But she's not there. Now I've embarrassed her very well. That's all right. She'll spank me later. Well, it is a joy to be here this morning. We had such a, many of us, we had such a beautiful wedding yesterday. Tanner and Rebecca were married. And we just kind of come right into the overflow of that here today. I'm just very grateful to be here. I felt a little bit odd by the program this morning. Daniel leading the singing. Samuel has the opening. Daryl has the children's lesson. And I have a message. But I want you to know, I didn't order that. But I must say, Daniel, it was your blessing to sing. Having you leading the worship. We missed that. We sent that away. But we knew what we were sending away. When we sent that away. We did. And I was thinking about Samuel's message. I'm not sure if you caught it, but I did. Imagine a whole army of people. And only two swords. And you apply that in a spiritual sense. I know we all have a Bible in our hand today. But that doesn't mean you have a sword in your hand today. Because you have a Bible sitting in your lap this morning. That doesn't mean you have a sword in your hand. If the word of God is abiding in our heart this morning. We have a sword in our hand. I wonder how many soldiers have a sword in their hand today. Like one of those soldiers in there. It says, after he battled all day long. That his hand claved to the sword. You know what that means? It means he held on to that thing so tightly that he couldn't get his fingers loose when he was done. And he had to take it loose like that. One finger at a time. His hand claved to the sword. And I thought about the children's lesson. Perfect for what I'm going to say this morning. Perfect introduction for the little children and the big children that are in this room. Praise God. Well, it's several weeks ago that I had a sermon here titled, The Generation Gap. Many of you remember that sermon. And some of you, I'm sure you don't have a clue. Your visitors here this morning. But we spoke, we addressed the issue of drift in the church. And specifically how that drift manifests itself from one generation to the next. Now you have Ma and you have Pa. They're here and you can see where Ma and Pa are going. But when you look at Sonny and you look at daughter and you see where they're going. There seems to be a gap between where the mother and father are going. And how it looks where they're going. And where the sons and the daughters are going. And how it looks where they're going. Do you remember that was a bit of a difficult sermon? Probably one of the hardest ones that I preached in a long, long time. But I was overwhelmed with the positive response that came after that sermon. And I must say, you young people blessed me more than anything else. As you stood one after another and said, That's what we want. God bless you. Every one of you young people. It seemed to me as I got some input back from the message that many brothers and sisters in the congregation were just waiting. For this subject to be addressed. Because it is a need among us. There was a dear Mennonite man here that morning. And he said these words to me. He said, I appreciated the message brother Denny. However, I was a little surprised to hear such a message from here. And I knew what he meant by that. But I quickly said, oh my dear brother. If you're not going to legislate the church by laws and rules. Then you must have messages like what you heard this morning. And I may say the same thing this morning. If we're not going to legislate this church by laws and rules. We must also hear the message that we're giving this morning. Which is to the fathers. And to the mothers. And to the young people. And to the children in the church. If you remember we brought this subject of discussion up in a brother's meeting. Oh, a couple, three weeks after the message. And a plea was made to have some teaching on how to do it. Okay, good message. But how do you do that? How do you stop the drift in a local assembly of believers? How do you close the gap that is there? How do you get from point A to point B on this subject? Well, that's the burden of my message this morning. How to close the generation gap. How to close the generation gap. If you remember I encouraged a family meeting in the last message that we had. It's just encouraging you to sit down with your families and open up this subject. I don't know how many of you did that. But we'll be encouraging you that again today. However, there is a danger. You can drop an authoritative bomb on your family after having heard a sermon like that. And be picking up the pieces for a long, long time. I do not advocate that. I don't think the answer to take care of the drift that is in the church is to drop an authoritative bomb in your home. But there are some things that you can do. And that's what we want to look at here this morning. We want to look at the practical principles which will help you on your way to close the gap between one generation and the next. That in fact you can see that the children are on the same page that mom and dad are on. That's what we're after. First of all, let us look at some foundational principles which will validate this whole subject. There should be no gap between one generation and the next. According to the Bible, what's right for dad is right for sonny. And what's right for mom is right for the daughter. Jesus said these words, Straight is the gate and narrow is the way that leadeth unto life and few there be that find it. Paul said it this way, if you want to turn there over to Philippians. We read these verses to the young people at Bible school on Sunday morning. But I want you to look at them again this morning in light of this subject. Some foundational principles that encourage us to understand that, Yea, it is not God's will that there be any gap between how the father and the mother live and how the children live. There shouldn't be any gap. In Philippians chapter 1 and verse 9, Paul expressing his heart toward the Philippian church. He says, this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in judgment. And that word judgment there is the word discernment. There's two words for judgment in the New Testament in the King James Bible. One is judging like God is going to judge you or thou shalt not judge. But the other one word used for judgment is the word discernment. And in that God wants every one of us to have judgment. He wants us to have discernment. He wants us to be able to look at the changing world we live in with a discerning eye, having looked into the Word of God and said, this is good and that is not. Paul is praying for that. That the Philippian church would have judgment, discernment. And look at verse 10, I love it. That ye may approve things that are excellent. That's what we're talking about here today. We're approving things that are excellent. We are approving from one generation to the next the things that we have found to be sweet and solid and dear and right in our own life. We're passing that on to the next generation and approving them to be excellent. And that was Paul's burden for the Philippian church. That ye may be, this is the result of having found those beautiful things, sincere and without offense till the day of Christ. Being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ unto the glory and praise of God. And that's why all of us are here. Unto the glory and praise of God. In Ephesians chapter 6, Paul tells us as parents to bring up our children in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord. Or, to pass on a vibrant practical faith to the next generation. Titus, if you'll turn there, Titus chapter 2. I want us to look here in these verses, and I know we've read them many times, but what can you say? They're full. I want you to see as we're reading, whether you can find any gap in the way the old men and the old women are to live, and the way that the young women and the young men are supposed to live. Let's read these verses and see if we can find a gap. Titus chapter 2 verse 1, But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine. Now, let's look at some of the sound doctrine. That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things. That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Young men likewise, exhort to be sober minded. In all things showing thyself a pattern of good works. In doctrine showing uncorruptness, gravity, and sincerity. Sound speech that cannot be condemned, that he that is of a contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you young men. Having no evil thing to say of you. Now, I don't see any gap in these verses. It seems to me that God wants the papa's that are 45 years old, and the young men that are 20 years old, to be living on the same level. All for God, all out for God, and all out for God's word, and the same for the moms and the daughters. God makes no difference in the next generation as I see in the word of God. Now, I want to apply this teaching in two ways this morning. We will be going back and forth a bit as we look at several principles. Number one, maybe this applies to you. There is a gap that is clear between your life and the lives of your youth. I am addressing this subject in light of you. As you sit here, you would say, I have a gap. How do I bring it back together? That's one application. And the other is, you are a sincere parent this morning with young children, and your heart cries out and says, how do I ensure that there will be no gap, when my children become young people? So we are going to apply it both ways as we go down through these practical principles. So how do you eliminate this gap? This gap we spoke about the last time. Grandpa, he won't listen to the radio. Papa, he listens to the Christian radio. Sonny, he listens to anything and everything. You ever see that gap? Those of us that live in this county, we see that gap everywhere we go. Just like that. Grandma wears a modest dress with a modest covering on her head. Mama shortens her dress and tightens the dress up a bit and wears a bit of a smaller covering. Daughter comes along, shortens the dress again, tightens it up nice and firm to display her youthful figure, wears an even smaller covering to display her hair. And that's called a generation gap. God doesn't want that. If we have that, it shows that something is wrong. We can place many issues in these two illustrations that I've given, but I just gave a couple of them to bring some of you along who missed the sermon six or seven weeks ago. I don't know. But maybe as you sit here this morning, you have woken up. You have come to grips with reality. You have said in your heart, there is a gap. We're not on the same page. We can't communicate. How do we close the gap? I think I have nine points here. But let's look at them briefly. If you'll turn with me over to Deuteronomy chapter one, where we want to look at the first one. I'm sorry, Deuteronomy chapter six and verse one. Let's look first of all, it is Father's responsibility. It is the Father's responsibility. Many a father has been glad to let the pastor take care of the generation gap. Many a father has been glad to let the Christian school teacher or the school board take care of the generation gap. But the Bible teaches that it is the Father's responsibility. Read with me in Deuteronomy six, starting in verse one. Now, we've looked at verse four through seven many times, but let's read along from verse one this morning. Now, these are the commandments, the statutes and the judgments which the Lord your God commanded to teach you that ye might do them in the land whither ye go to possess it. Now, this is Moses speaking. And he's giving these things to the next generation of Israelites. One generation died in the wilderness. It's forty years later and another generation is now on the scene and Moses is teaching the next generation what God wants them to know. Verse two. That thou mightest fear the Lord thy God to keep all his statutes and his commandments which I command thee, thou and thy son and thy son's son, all the days of thy life, and that thy days may be prolonged. Hear therefore, O Israel, and observe to do it, that it may be well with thee, and that ye may increase mightily, as the Lord God of thy fathers hath promised thee in the land that floweth with milk and honey. Now, we can see by the words that Moses is giving to the children of Israel, he's telling the generation that he's teaching right now, you need to be doing this, but I'm giving you these instructions so that you can be doing it, but not only so that you can be doing it, but so that your sons can also be doing it, and I'm not just after your sons doing it, I also am giving it to you so that your sons' sons can be doing it. And whether you realize it or not, it is in that middle generation where everything hangs right there. You miss it in that middle generation, you don't have another generation, brothers and sisters. It's gone! That thy sons will rise up and do it. And thy sons' sons. Hallelujah. It's beautiful. Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God is one Lord, and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine heart. There's that sword again in your hand. Shall be in thine heart, and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. Okay, the point here, this first principle is simply this. Brethren, it's our responsibility to take the generation that God has given to us, and instill in them the same things that God has put in us. That's our responsibility. In Ezekiel's day, God said this, I have sought for a man that should make up the heads and stand in the gap. And guess what he said following that? And I found none. I found none. Dear fathers, you are God's man for your family. You are the one who stands in the gap. You are the one who surveys the wall. You are the one that sees where the breaches are. And you are the one that goes to that breach and says, we're going to fix this breach in the wall. You, we, we're the ones. That's it. In Ezekiel, oh we should read this one. Ezekiel 13, turn there. Ezekiel 13 and verse 5. Speaking about the prophets, but I believe we can apply it to our own hearts this morning. God says through Ezekiel to the prophets who were not being faithful, ye have not gone up into the gaps, the breaches, neither made up the heads for the house of Israel to stand in the battle in the day of the Lord. Look at that Samuel. To stand in the battle in the day of the Lord. Is God speaking there about swords in their hands? We know He's not. We know that's not what He's talking about in that verse right there. He's talking about standing in a gap spiritually. He's talking about standing in the way. He's talking about going up and filling in the breaches in the battles of the Lord which we heard about already this morning. Father, You are God's man in Your family to stand in that gap. To administrate or manage Your household into a godly testimony. Us fathers are the ones. Now, this is not always a pleasant job which we will address a little bit later. It's not always a pleasant job. And I believe that's why many fathers just kind of lay back in this thing and say, well, you know, let somebody else do it or maybe it will take care of itself. And I hope somebody gives a good sermon on this subject, you know. But we don't address it ourselves. We don't have enough courage to take that thing and face it full out in our families. Which is where it needs to be done. And for some, and I may say some who are weak, would rather be in a place where the ministry just writes down all the rules and puts them to you every six months. Are you keeping this? Are you wearing the right kind of shoes? Are you listening to the radio? You can't have communion if you're doing this and you're doing that. Now, some fathers say, hey, that's the way I want it. But I believe that it's not the responsibility of a church just to make some rules and hold the young people to those rules, but it's the father's responsibility to stand in the gap and take their young people on in all that God has for them. I believe that's our responsibility. Now, it's a whole lot easier if you go to one of them other churches where all of it's done and all the rules are laid out. But the question is, do we want to be spiritual or do we want to be carnal? That's the challenge this morning. Which one will we be? Dad, it's our responsibility. And it's not right to put it on someone else. Point number two. I'll move along here. This responsibility begins in childhood. Many, many a mistake is made right here on this point. Parents, some in ignorance, think there's nothing to do until my young people are here. They don't realize that they have responsibilities from the time the children are young. And it doesn't come out right, I'm telling you. Parents have no vision to influence the next generation. Some parents just simply neglect their responsibilities, i.e. no family devotions, day after day after day after day. And all of a sudden, and you know how it is, brethren, phew, ten years went by just like that. And little Johnny boy, he's now a young man, and he's got his own mind, and it's time for him to go to the store and buy what he wants. And he starts looking at the clothes he's gonna wear, and the kind of car he's gonna buy. And all of a sudden, mom and dad realize, uh-oh, this thing ain't coming out right. Well, you do have a problem. But this morning, for many of us, this message is simply preventative maintenance. If you start when they are young, there hardly is even such a thing in your home. Can I say it that way? Can I be that simple? It's hardly even a battle. If you start when you're young, and you go all the way through, it's hardly even a battle. But let me say this. Fathers, it's not too late. It's not too late. It's true, it's gonna be more difficult to manage and administrate a change of direction in your home. But it's not too late to change direction in your home. You have the Word of God and the Spirit of God with you. It's not too late. Don't despair. As you sit here this morning, if you think, uh-oh, I'm one of those who just woke up and realized, I should have been very busy about this whole thing years ago. And now I see my error. Do not despair, brother, sister, mom, dad. It's not too late. It's just gonna be a little more difficult. But I want to encourage you, steer that boat. Do it faithfully, even if you're doing it late. It's better to grab the wheel late than not grab it at all. Amen? And steer that boat back. Point number three. How do you close the gap, the generation gap? Point three. Thou shalt diligently teach them. Thou shalt diligently teach them. We read the verses, we don't need to read them again. But I want to say this this morning. The answer is not, just make some laws and rules. But break down the Word and teach them. Now, let me say this. Every home needs laws and rules. Every home. If there are none, there's something wrong. But those laws and rules are only in place until you can bring that child to the place where that law or that rule is now a principle written on their heart and they don't need the law or the rule anymore. Laws and rules are good when you're raising children. If you don't have them, you have a problem. But those laws and rules must be replaced by convictions that are written on their hearts. And that takes place every day, every day. Teaching, opening up the Bible and teaching the principles of the Word of God to the children. That's how it takes place. Teaching inspirational instruction from the father and even the mother. And by that I mean teaching the principles behind the laws which are based on the Word of God. Every one of them. Teach them the Bible and make practical applications thereof. Oh, I love what Tozer says about teaching and preaching. He says, If you teach the Bible or preach the Bible and you have not made any practical applications, you have not taught yet. Oh, there's a whole generation of preachers in this land today that need to heed such a word as that. Because that's exactly what they're doing. They're teaching the Bible and not applying it. Because when you apply it, you step on people's toes. You don't win friends and influence people when you step on their toes. And you may lose your salary if you say the wrong thing. So they just kind of give the word out and, you know, quote, let the Holy Spirit do the applying. That is a big mistake. So, we want to teach the principles of the Word of God to our children and make applications. And the reason for the applications, brothers and sisters, is we live in a fast-changing world. And every generation has a new challenge on their hands. And if the fathers of every generation don't break that thing down and say to the children, That is bad and let me show you why. Open up your Bibles to this place and let's look at these verses. If the fathers and the mothers don't do that, well, then the children, they're just going to be looking at that and thinking, Well, I know dad said it's bad, but, you know, dad's dad. And, you know, he's kind of getting old. And, you know, well, we'll just kind of satisfy him here a bit. But someday when I leave home, it's going to be different. Dad, you didn't give them a reason out of the Word of God. You just told them it's wrong. Maybe you said the church doesn't want us to do that. That's a cop-out, brother. Don't you put that on the preachers. The preachers don't want us to do it, so we're not going to do it. Come on, let's get deeper than that. Thus saith the Lord. Forget about thus saith the preacher. Thus saith the Lord. That will go deep down inside of the heart. Thou shalt diligently teach them. The Word of God tells us. And may I just leave this challenge with us as we go on to the next point. You can't do this if you don't take the time and order your life to take the time. This doesn't happen. Put it in your family schedule. We will catechize the family, the children every day. This will close the gap, dear brothers and sisters. Point number four. Relationship is a key factor in closing this generation gap. Where there is a free flow of fellowship between parents and children, it is very easy to manage this gap. Where there's communication, where there's confidence, where there's trust, it's easy to guide this thing. So, I want to encourage you, young parents with young children, keep the communication lines open. It's so easy to steer. So easy. Malachi chapter four, we find these words. He shall turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers. Now, there are many, many applications that we can make to that verse. But I think the heart of the heart of that verse is a relationship between father and children and children and father. And when we look at this whole subject of a generation gap, usually, like I said in the last message, if there's a gap, there's a gap because there's a difference in thinking. And there's a difference in how I look at it and how my son looks at it, because there has not been communication. Relationship is very important. And when that is an ongoing reality, it's easy to direct the children. You may say here this morning, but brother, I blew it! I blew it! I don't have a relationship. I don't know how to talk to them. Maybe even you thought about having a family meeting, but because of that strain in relationship, you didn't have one of those family meetings. Maybe. What shall we do about it? Well, you can just lay down and say there's no hope for us. Or, you can repent. You can repent. I've learned the hard way that children forgive moms and dads when moms and dads repent. Just say, I'm sorry. I didn't do right. I'm sorry. There's a strain between us. I'm sorry that you don't feel free to talk to me. I'm sorry. I think it's a cop-out for you just to simply say, well, I blew it and that's just the way it is. So, I think that's a cop-out. It's still right to guide your family even if you just woke up. It's still right. And my encouragement to you is to acknowledge your need and guide your home and keep on building. Amen? Acknowledge your need so there can be a clearing. Keep on guiding your home because it's right to do that. And keep on building that relationship because you know it's right in the sight of God to be close to your young people. And may I say again, time is the key to relationships. It takes time to build relationships. You say, well, Brother Denny, I don't have any time. Well, what is your greatest treasure? Give time to your greatest treasure. It's the only one you can take with you. Point number five in nine points. Have a family meeting. And I'm not sure how many of you did that. But we did. In fact, if I remember right, we had a family meeting all day. We just talked and talked. All the way home we talked. We talked at the supper table. We took a little nap. We went for a walk. We talked while we were on a walk. And we sat down in the evening to have a family meeting on this subject. And we were all talked out because we talked about it all afternoon. Sit down and talk. You need to open up the subject with your family. And we are giving you a platform again, even this morning. That if you didn't feel free before, we are giving you a platform again. I want to encourage you to take that platform and sit down with your family. And talk about the gap between the one generation and the next. Talk about it. For some of you, having a family meeting is simply preventative maintenance. But you know, preventative maintenance is probably one of the wisest things that you can do. I mean, hear the little proverb. A stitch in time saves nine. You ever hear that one ladies? That's what we are talking about this morning. Change the oil and you won't have to change the engine. Manage a godly home. Managing a godly home should be done a little at a time. By the way, that's the same with the church too. It should be done a little at a time. If it's done a little at a time, there's hardly a ruffle. But if you put it off, and you put it off, and you stick your head in the sand, and you wait for it to go away, and you hope it will go away, and maybe the preacher will say something, and it'll all come around okay. If you're doing that, the gap is getting greater and greater, and it will not be as easy to turn the ship. But I want to encourage you, sit down with the family anyway, and turn the ship. It was interesting to me, just this is a few weeks back now, but sister Helen Limey stopped over to pick up something at our house, and she said, Brother Denny, I want to thank you for that message you gave on the generation gap. Rick listened to it, and he has the whole family listening to it, and the smaller children must listen to it twice. And we're busy doing that today, and when dad comes home, we're going to have a family meeting. And they did have a family meeting, and it lasted for hours that evening. Now why is brother Rick doing that? Do you see a lot of gap there? I don't see a lot of gap there. Why is he doing that? It's called preventative maintenance. He is a father who knows it's his responsibility to bring his family along in the same faith that Mo and Paul have. And he sees the opportunity. It's time to move this thing forward a bit, and to keep things moving in the right direction. And he sat them down and had a good long family talk. Wise man. Point number six, how do you close the gap, the generation gap? Number six, you need some church support. And I waited to put this one in down toward the end, because I do not believe it's the responsibility of the church to take care of this issue, and the fathers and the mothers just sit back and wait on the church. But I do believe it's right for the church to support the fathers and the mothers in this whole issue. It's right. Blessed is the father and mother who has a church that will support them in the way and the direction that they want to take their family. Blessed is the father and mother that is in a church that does teach the same thing that Paul said the preacher said. Blessed is that church, and the father and mother that are in that church, that provides examples, so that as you seek to close this gap, or maintain this thing together like it should be, you're not all by yourself trying to convince the next generation that you really are right. You know? But you can look around, they can look around, and you can look around, and you realize, yeah, yeah, this is right. Yeah, yeah, they just heard it again. These messages that we've given, the brothers meeting discussion that we had, and the suggestion to have a family meeting, are all efforts to support you brothers and sisters to go for this thing with all your hearts. We support you in it. We'll come alongside of you. We'll give the sermons every now and then. But, oh brother, let's get on board. And we want to be faithful to address the practical issues at times. We want to be faithful to do that. You see, we all work together to provide a clear testimony and clear examples, not just the ministers. Now think about this, fathers, mothers, how much you appreciate this when it happens. When a youth walks up to another youth and says, My dad is fussing about my music. And the youth says to the other youth, Oh, you have a good father. You need to listen to what he's saying if he's fussing about your music. Blessed is that youth who hears another youth say those words. Thank God for the children's lesson this morning. Because it isn't always that way, is it? Sometimes the youth will say, Why does your dad make you do that? How come you can't go? And all those kind of things. They happen. We need church support. Number seven. To close the gap, or keep no gap there, Father, you need the support of a faithful wife. You need the support of a faithful wife. The two trumpets must have the same sound. Amen? When both trumpets have the same sound, the children aren't going like this. Hallelujah! All they hear is one sound coming out of two trumpets. What else can they do but listen? But if the trumpets don't have the same sound, and you watch it, you know if that plague is in your house, you know it real fast, when you speak up and you see the child go, or the trumpets must have the same sound. And then that child may be shining this way or that, not sure. They're silenced. There's nowhere to look. If they look here, if they look over here, and if they look up here, God is also looking down saying, Hallelujah! Praise God! Appeal to your wives to be a helpmeet in this area. I need your help. I want to steer this ship, and I need your help. Wives, you are a powerful second voice in confirming the direction that your husband is trying to lead the home. You are a powerful confirming voice, or a powerful voice of destruction. Three dangers are here. Number one, simply the danger of neglect. It's all for my husband to do. It's not for me to do. Remember, it's no fun to steer the ship at times. And sometimes wives just say, it's no fun to steer the ship and stand behind, and I'm just going to stay out of it completely. God wants you to get on board. Number two danger, subtle disagreement. Allowing changes to take place a little bit at a time. Knowing that's not what Father wants. But little by little by little you allow that. And number three danger, open disagreement. Two ways that can take place. Number one, by a bold verbal disagreement. At the time that direction is trying to be given, and number two, many times when a father does wake up and say, whoa, wait a minute. My youth are going the wrong way. We've got to steer the ship. Many times the wives then will say, oh no, we're not going to steer the ship. We're fine. The ship's fine the way it's going. We're not going to steer the ship any different. And the wives say, no, I want to encourage you wives. Your husband wants to steer the ship. You get on board. Proverbs 14.1 says some very sobering words to the sisters this morning. Every wise woman buildeth her house. Is that talking about a physical house? But the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. Point number eight. Oh, we're going to get done here. Point number eight. Fathers and mothers must have calm, quiet authority if you're going to steer the ship in such a way that there's no gap between one generation and the next. Fathers and mothers must have calm, quiet authority. No arguments. No tit for tat. None. Remember I said earlier, it must start when the children are young. All of the points that I've made thus far, if done rightly from an early age, flow together to produce a next generation that has the same convictions as their parents. And for some, it may only be a few in this room this morning, but for some in this room, they can't hardly relate to this message because they've been steering the ship all their days. And there's no ruffle in the next generation, and there's no chiving against mom or dad, and there's no trying to change the way the clothes are going to look, and there's no going a different direction, and always trying to live on the edge because they've just been guiding the ship all through the years. And you know, the children, God gives them to us young. Praise God for that. He gives them to us. He gives them to us with hearts that desire to go the way we want to go and please us in everything. And if we take that opportunity and seize it with our whole heart and just guide the ship along down through the years as it goes by and all the teaching and all the many things that we've said many times from this pulpit, guess what? There's hardly a gap there at all. And no ruffle when papa tries to change a little this or that or say, you know, I don't feel good about this or that CD. I don't like that CD. It's no big deal. No big deal at all. Why? Because somebody's been guiding the ship for many, many years and so it's no problem. If you will do your homework while they are young, there'll hardly be a glitch as they get older. God has given you the place of authority in your home, father specifically and mother also under your husband. God has given you a place of authority. You have it. It's already yours. And all of heaven stands up for it. You need not fight for it. You don't need to holler about it. You don't need to fuss about it. You don't need to proclaim it in your home. You just simply need to exercise it in a calm, quiet authority. That's it. See? You don't have to say, no. You can simply say, I don't think we're going to do that. Okay? You trust me. I'll take you back. You know? But some fathers and mothers somehow insecure in the authority which God gave them, and maybe they had a few skirmishes with the children. It's like we've got to stomp our foot and smack the fish down and let them know that we're in charge. No. You don't need to let them know you're in charge. You are in charge. Just simply, calmly give direction. That's all. And brothers and sisters, this is easy to do when the children are young. And I would encourage you, parents, do it now. Don't delay. It's more difficult later. But if you find yourself in that place where you say, it is more difficult. I am just waking up. Brother, sister, you still have the same authority. Just guide the ship gradually with a calm, quiet authority. Don't argue. No fusses. No arguments. No debates over the issue. No. We're just going to talk calmly. We're going to give direction and guide the family. That's the way out, brother, sister. That's the way out. You must learn to direct your family. You must learn to say no. You must learn to encourage them. You must learn to say no. Parents, you must learn to say no. It's okay to say no. It's awful quiet in here. You must learn to say no. Kindly, graciously, but firmly. Say no. I don't want you to do that. No, we're not going to do that. Oh, I know that this means a lot to you, but I just don't feel clear for us to do that. Okay. You trust me. You must learn to say no. Well, a whole sermon is needed on this point, but we'll move ahead to the last point. Number nine. The youth must be willing. Dear young people, this morning, you play a key role in closing the generation gap. If there is one. And you play a key role in not having a generation gap between your father and mother and you. You are a key player in this whole thing. I want to remind you this morning that the Spirit of God, the same Spirit of God that is brooding over your parents and has captivated their heart and turned their hearts toward you in ways that were not there before. That same Spirit of God, according to Malachi chapter 4, is also brooding over you to turn your heart toward your parents in ways that you've not known before. May I encourage you this morning, don't resist the Holy Ghost. The Holy Ghost is brooding over your life. This is not a little thing, young person. This is not a little one. This is not something that you can ride out for two or three more years and just get by on and then you can start making your own decisions. It won't come out right. I can give you a list of sad stories this morning, but I won't. Allow the Spirit of God to turn you. You know, I mentioned the word hard job a couple of times already in the sermon. You know what really makes the job hard, young people? Have you figured it out? It's when your young people are going like this. You know, you ever try to get a calf to go through a new gate? They put their front hooves out like this. And I mean, it's hard to get them to move. The youth must be willing. If you are unwilling, it makes the task very difficult. It's like steering a ship, you know, and you're trying to steer the ship over this way, but there's a wind blowing on the front of the ship and you just keep steering, but the wind just keeps blowing and it's so hard to move that thing just a little bit. Don't be the wind blowing against the front of the ship, young people. God is watching. And I thought, maybe, maybe you're the reason why we didn't have a family meeting yet because mom and dad, they're just not sure how this will go over. So, they're just kind of waiting and praying and you know, they're not sure how to approach it and maybe take a little time to build some relationship and try to get close. Can't really address the issue. Oh, young person, do you know your father's heart on the practical issues in your life? Do you know your father's heart? Young person, don't you go against your father's heart if you know your father's heart. Don't you do that. I don't care who you are. I don't care what your reasons are. Maybe you say, well, my dad didn't do it right. Yeah, I heard the last message and you said relationships and he didn't do it right and we're not close. Well, since when are authorities supposed to be perfect and you only submit to the ones that are perfect? Where do you find that in the Bible? Do you know your father's heart, young person? I know how my dad feels about you fill in the blank. But, don't touch me in this. And you, maybe you wouldn't say that to dad, but your spirit says, don't you get near me on this subject. Oh Lord. Very simple verses, but I want to read them to you this morning. I think you can probably quote them, most of you. But I want us to listen to them again this morning. Before the Lord. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. For this is right. This is right. Young people. Honor thy father and mother which is the first commandment with promise that it may be well with thee. And that thou mayest live long on the earth. Do you know your father's heart concerning practical issues in your life? Yield to him, young people. Go to him and give him the freedom. Do you know of an area that that silent message is good? Go to dad and say, Dad, you're welcome. You're welcome. Tell him you want to have a talk about this subject. Say, but I'm not close to my dad. My dad didn't do very well. We don't have a close relationship. That may be so, young people, but your dad is still trying to guide the ship. You need to obey him. You need to obey him. Even if he doesn't have a close relationship, you still need to obey him. It is for your good, if you will. So, I just want to encourage you, young people, to get on dad's bandwagon and start playing the same song that dad is playing. I want to encourage you to do that. Okay. Well, I hope that these few points will be a help to us all as we endeavor to guide our families down a right path that generations from now it won't be all mixed up like some of the family pictures can be, you know. I trust that God will help us. Thank you for listening. Thank you, Brother Denny, sharing with us this morning I wonder how many of us parents this week faced these things this week. How many of us parents needed to say no? I did, you know. I needed to say no this week. It's not easy, is it? I do want to thank my sons and daughters for allowing us to say no. Thank you, girls. Thank you, boys. Two issues very clearly in our home this week. Can we go? Dad said no. What about that CD? It's reality. It's where we're living. So, I know our time is about up. If anyone has something on their heart to share you would mind the Lord. The Lord is speaking to you about something. We'll give you the opportunity to share this morning. It seems like as women we have such a key position. Almost a scary position. One time I heard a wise man say that the father makes the rules for the home. But it is the response of the wife that will determine how the children accept those decisions. If she kicks, if she barks, if she complains, says Papa's unreasonable, then you will face major battles with the children. I don't know why God always lets us share out of failure. But I have had many failures in these areas. Sometimes innocently. Sometimes I had a little teeny check and I went ahead and made a decision that proved to be wrong. You know, it's not a bargain if you buy it at a garage sale if it grieves Papa. What does it matter that you saved a couple dollars? We as wives are so many times in control of the testimony of what our husband's name is. We are the expression of his heart. And I'm just going to be real honest and real practical. A couple weeks ago I was at Walmart and I purchased two sweaters for my girls. That seemed okay. Not wicked. But Papa said, Mama, oh, well, what does Mama do? Mama gave them to the girls. What do the girls do? Thank the Lord that we've grown in this area and we did have the receipts and we were able to take them back and honor what Papa preferred just a little bit different style, a little bit different in the color. I have made a mistake of choosing clothing from a garage sale. Papa said, Mama, I don't want to go that way. Oh, but it's this or that or the other. And even sometimes friends say, why is your husband so strict? We need to encourage each other as women. If our husband has a preference, that's a personal family preference, not that he's saying other people are wicked, then Mama needs to respond and honor that. And what's it really going to matter in eternity if we follow a little bit more conservative road than somebody else does? The unity in the home is well worth the effort to maybe give up something that isn't bad, but it's not what Papa prefers. We almost sometimes as a wife can be Job's wife and say, and make what he wants not important. And we don't want to do that. I think that we need to be extra careful. We have to push the reset button. I think that's what we did in our house. We pushed the reset button again on some issues and said, well, where are we going? And where will this little change take us? I think as women, the best thing we can do is ask. When we get a different kind of material, Papa, what do you think about this material? Don't buy it, make the dress, and then force your husband in the corner and say, I already sold it, and I already paid the money. But rather ask him ahead of time. Then you don't have to face some of the disappointment. So I think we need to be willing to push the reset button. And we also need to not get by. I hear many women say, oh, my husband doesn't mind if I do this or that or the other. But what's his heart? What does he really want you to do? And I am determined. I want to follow my husband. I'm sorry for those times where I failed. He's been very forgiving. I appreciate the opportunity to take the time to write these things in our home. Thank you, Jackie. I was very blessed by the message this morning as well. And I just want to take this time as well to just bless my family. We've come through a lot of storms in some of these areas as well. But I also realize that maybe too often I've just concentrated on saying no and passed the opportunities up to bless my wife and family. Just speak blessings over them when we do have opportunities. And too often I realize looking in the past that I was relationally bankrupt in my relation with my family. And I regret that. And I just want to tell my wife and family I'm sorry in that area. God has granted us great strides and victory in these areas of our lives. And the Lord is taking us on. And praise the Lord for that. My biggest prayer is that God would show me how to speak blessings because I realize that it is much easier for my family to follow me when I'm not just saying no all the time, but when I always say yes unless I have a compelling reason to say no. God bless you for sharing the message. It was very good for me. There's a verse in 1 Thessalonians 3 where it says, For what thanks can we render to God again for you for all the joy wherewith we joy for your sakes before our God. I think I can express the feelings of many people here when we say that we are so thankful and joyful for clear teaching. We as a family in Holland are alone. And 10 years ago I stepped away from my church. We're all alone. Came into contact with tapes. And since then through the contacts with brothers and sisters have been blessed beyond measure. Sometimes we would like to give something back and we cannot. In the Dutch translation it doesn't say render but it says recompense to God. And there's an enormous thankfulness in our lives because the Lord has allowed us to salvage some of the wreckage that we had. Our perfect willingness to want to follow Him but not working it out properly in the family. We're not there yet. There's a lot to do. I've learned so much this morning. Can't wait to go home. I would also like to take the opportunity I don't know if there's any time later on to also express our thanks for the support the brothers and sisters for the meetings in September in Holland. They're such a blessing. Those that came. Those that were willing to let them go. Some of the families that let a husband or a wife go came all together. Not only that. I was myself so touched and also my wife and children by all the boxes. For example the boxes of cookies that were sent along. With texts on them. Encouragements. And I think this verse here that I just read can also be applied to you all. We have so felt the support of the brothers and sisters here. Not only as a family but all those that came with a little piece of heaven for a weekend. Same atmosphere as here. Such a joy. It was our hope for all these years that we would be able somehow to demonstrate what we meant. What we had found when we met you for the first time. So I think that we cannot recompense. We cannot give you anything back. We can only say what thanks can we render to God. May the Lord bless you in your lives. All of you. May the Lord lead us on. We don't know when the Lord will come back. What a joy it would be that we as families could stand together and look up in great joy at the coming of the Lord Jesus and go up together in unity. May the Lord bless you all. Thank you brother. May the Lord make you to be in Holland what He has made us to be here. Amen. I want to say this morning that I appreciate the follow-up message here. I have been doing a lot of pondering and thinking over a lot of different things since the last message. God has brought it again to my heart this morning as I look back in my own life. I would just like to make a plea to all the fathers and mothers here this morning that as you see and are grieved perhaps over some of the fruits that you see in your young people have you allowed God to check your own heart first? I know you can say all the right things. You can follow this list. You can have the family meetings. But if your actions, your heart speaks louder then your words, your young people cannot and will not hear you. So I just make that plea this morning that you would allow God to just search your own heart. Am I the reason for the things that are coming forth in my young people? Thank you, Lynn. I thank the Lord also this morning for the message. I think that I can bring my children to where they can hear many times the same things they heard at home. It takes care of a lot of... Then you are the only guy that thinks that way. Praise the Lord for that. But I confess that I need to grow in what Dennis said second to last point about addressing them calmly. I need to grow in that area. But I am growing, hallelujah. The Lord is doing the work. So I praise God for that. Thank you. I would like to I guess put a plea in for the young people. Let's make it easy for our parents. Let's be those that they can easily steer that ship. Open up our lives to them and allow them to steer. What does it matter in eternity of that CD or the clothes you want to wear? What will it matter? It matters in your heart. And we as young people will be the fathers of the next generation. We will be the father. Our parents will be the grandfather. What will our next generation look like or be like? We are responsible now to give ourselves under authority and be willing to be different from others. Because of our parents' convictions and what they live for what they stood for and do stand for. Let's make it easy for them. I am also blessed with this message and I just like to bless my family and bless my young people and especially thanks to my young people for many times in the past where you have not made me say no. You've taken my well, I don't feel good about it as a no. It really makes relationships flourish. I just thank you for that. I failed many times in the past. I know you, my older children, know that. You know I repented of that. I think you all know my heart. You know the way I want to go and I'm blessed to see in your hearts that you want to go the same way. God bless you. God bless you for preaching that today. I'd just like to say to my parents, to Dad, you know, I'm very thankful, Dad, for you guiding the ship and for praying for your family. I'd like to thank you, Mom, for keeping your trumpet in tune with Dad. It has really been a blessing in my life and I can say I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for you both being united as one. I'd just like to thank you and to encourage you youth to bless your parents. You know, I sat here today and I realized our parents have blessed us a lot. How many times have we blessed them back? Thank you. Amen. I'd like to say I never had the choices that these children have today. I do have a choice now though. I just want to say from my heart that it's very easy to take our parents for granted. It's very easy to take life for granted. Don't take this gift that Jesus has given us for granted. My heart trembles now because I can look back and see where I made mistakes being a single man. I still make mistakes. I don't have a parent but I do have people that love me. I know the people here love me. I know. There's no question in my heart that you love me. And we got to learn to love each other and forgive each other but try to help each other because it's all about Jesus and I hope this makes sense because what I hear day in and day out from my brothers and sisters, I just don't want it going in one ear and out the other. I want it to go to my heart. I keep praying to the Lord that I'm doing the right things to serve Him, not for myself. Not for anybody else. Not for the church but for Jesus. It's going to be Jesus that I face when I die. It's not going to be anybody here. But you people can help me. The Bible can help me. Coming to church with an open heart. Coming to a brother or sister with an open heart. All these things are from Jesus. So some of the things that were said this morning are so beautiful and they touch me. I'll probably never have children but the children here today will be the children that will take God's name forever long as the earth exists. So I thank you very much. Thank you each one who shared. It's not very exciting to be up here moderating a meeting, recognizing all the needs that I have but it's a painful reminder or not necessarily a painful reminder, it's a very clear reminder that we as parents can hide nothing. We can't hide anything basically from our church family. Our children express who we are so well. It's a real challenge for us to walk with God, to have our homes in order. Well, again, I thank God for that clear teaching this morning. I'm very jealous for this body that we would continue to have such clear teaching. I really appreciate it. May that continue and may God give us grace to walk it out.