Abner Jones - 13-I did not at that time call my improvements �preaching�.

“I did not at that time call my improvements ‘preaching’.” The week following, I had some business in Danville, and after having attended to my business, I thought that I would call on Deacon Dow, who lived near the court house. I believe I had never seen the Deacon more than twice before that time, and that was in meeting; for I never was in his house before. When I first went to the house Deacon Dow was not at home, but I was courteously received by his wife and family, who never saw me before excepting one of his daughters, who introduced me to her mother. After I had been there perhaps an hour or such a matter, the old gentleman came home, who seemed very glad to see me, and as near as I can recollect, addressed me in the following manner, "Well brother Jones I am glad to see you, I want you should come to my house and preach." I answered, what do you mean? I never preached in my life. For I did not at that time call my improvements preaching. And I was very sure in my own mind that he had not heard of my attempting to speak in the way that I have described above. He answered, I know that, but the Lord has shewed me that you have got to preach. You have got to give up your practice of physic, and all your ideas of greatness, and be a preacher; and now my house is free, and you must come and preach here. This declaration and invitation together, almost thunder struck me, my vow that I made to the Lord was fresh before me, (viz.) That if the Lord would put it into the hearts of the people to open their doors, I would consider it as a token from God, that he had called me to preach, and that I would improve when such doors were open. I felt also what the Apostle Paul said, "WOE IS ME IF I PREACH NOT THE GOSPEL." Therefore I dare do no other way than to appoint the meeting, but I appointed it a number of weeks forward, so that it would not come until after my other appointment. I believe it was not more than two weeks after I made the above vow, before I was invited to preach in four different towns. At length the time arrived for my second appointment, it being on the first day of the week. I now found myself under as great a trial as at the first, my fears were that I now was about to run when no tidings were ready, and if that should provide to be the case, I should wound the cause, and be confounded before the people. I had not one doubt but what God helped me when I attempted to preach, and gave me a message from heaven; but now I feared I was going in my own name. But no discharge in this war for me, I have put my hand to the plough and dare not look back. So I mounted my horse in the morning to ride about five miles to preach, but the feelings of my soul I cannot describe. I however set out with the same servant designs as when I first went to the same place on the same errand, viz. Lord if thou has called me to go and preach to day, gave me a message right from heaven, if not chain up my mouth before the people in such a manner that I cannot speak. I thought if he was determined to give me a text to preach from, I should receive it in the same piece of woods, where I received my first message, as I have before described. But to my great surprise, I had no passage of scripture come to mind, one more than another, and so I began to feel extremely tried and cast down. In this situation I passed on to the place appointed. When I came thither I found myself under a new trial; for not so much as one person had assembled for meeting. I now began to conclude that the people did not succeed to their minds in opposing me in my first sermon and now they had made an agreement together not to come to meeting, so that I should not have any body to hear me, so impose upon me in that way. I began to think how the people would salute me on my return, and say who have you been visiting this way that is sick, &c. O, thought I, what can I say? how can I see any body? what a fine story by tomorrow will be ringing over town (viz.) Doct. Jones has tried to preach once, and appointed to preach again, and not one soul went to hear him. While these thoughts were passing my mind, the people began to collect for meeting, so this temptation proved short lived, for in a small pace of time almost every person in the neighborhood assembled.

I now began to be exercised very differently from what I was a few minutes before; my cry was, Lord what shall I say to these people? for I have no passage of scripture on my mind, one more than another. While I sat there I could not fix my mind on one passage of scripture in all the bible, I turned the bible from place to place, but could not find any lead of mind on any thing. I thought of some scriptures, that my mind had been greatly lead upon in times past, but my mind seemed entirely shut up, even to the ideas that had been on my mind before. I was then still more confirmed that the Lord helped me in trying to preach before, for if I might had a thousand worlds, I could not speak as I had done before. In this situation, I began to think, surely I have run this time before I was sent, and God has heard my prayers, and stopped my mouth completely. I was just thinking of telling the people that I could not speak, unless the Lord gave me something to say, and that he had not given me any thing, and so I had nothing for them. But suddenly this passage of scripture rolled through my mind, "is any afflicted let them pray." I had no ideas to speak from that scripture, only it taught me that it was my duty to pray, I immediately obeyed and found freedom in the same.

After I arose from prayer, one of Dr. Watts Psalms or Hymns, struck my mind to read and sing, and yet I had no text on my mind to speak from. I rose up to read the Psalm, or Hymn, with as much composure as ever I did in my life for ought I know, but after I had read it I felt for a moment a kind of fluttering in my mind, for no one present was capable of taking the lead of singing but myself, therefore this must fall on me also, yet I had no text to preach from. These thoughts passed my mind; O that some one was capable of taking the lead of singing, perhaps I might find something to preach from while they are singing. The thought then passed my mind, the Lord never requested more from his creatures than he will enable them to perform, and so my mind was calmed in a moment. I named a tune and went on and sung with as much deliberation as usual; as we were singing the last, or the last verse but one, this passage of scripture rolled through my soul and brought with it a pleasing chain of ideas. "Lord how is it that thou will manifest thyself unto us and not unto the world," John 14:22. This passage of scripture was quite new to me, for I do not think I ever had a moment’s contemplation on it in my life, neither did I know where to find it, only I knew it was Christ’s words.

After singing I sat down and opened the bible, wishing to find my text, and turning a leaf or two over I cast my eye on the passage. I rose up and named my text, and God assisted me to speak with great freedom. I dwelt principally on Christ’s manifesting himself to his children, and among the rest I told my hearers, how he manifested himself to me in giving me the text to preach from. A very great attention to hear the word, appeared in every person present, and there seemed a very great solemnity on the minds of the people. After meeting I was desired to appoint another meeting, which I accordingly did. My third meeting was in the same place where my two first were, my text was in the 2d. Psalms 12:1-8 th verse. "Kiss the son, lest he be angry, & ye perish from the way, when his wrath is kindled, but a little. Blessed are all they, who put their trust in him." I had great freedom in speaking, and the people seemed to hear with solemn attention. Since that time I have not preached in that neighborhood. My fourth appointment was at Danville, at Maj. Morril’s. My text was, "strait is the gate and narrow is the way that leadeth to life," &c. I found very little freedom in speaking, and my soul was exceedingly tried, for I had until that time found great freedom in speaking. But notwithstanding my embarrassment in the day time, Deacon Dow, insisted that I should appoint a meeting in the evening at his house, so I did, in the midst of smoking furnace. This evening was the first time that I had attempted to speak more than once in one day; but the Lord stood by me and gave me freedom that evening. I then felt my soul greatly refreshed, and fully determined to go on in my feeble manner preaching Christ. If I recollect right, I preached also on Mond. afternoon, & on Tuesday returned home, being absent from Sunday morning, until Tuesday.