In this sermon, the speaker discusses the process of spiritual growth and maturity. He emphasizes the importance of moving from being a child to becoming a young man and eventually a father in the faith. The speaker highlights that this progression requires a change in perspective and a willingness to be sent out and commissioned by God. He also mentions that settling into a higher level of spiritual maturity brings about a sense of fulfillment and purpose. The speaker draws examples from the Bible to illustrate these concepts and encourages the audience to strive for personal competence in their spiritual journey.

Our speaker this evening is Mr. Norman Grubb, known to very many of you here. And he brought with him Mr. Dan Stone and Miss Audrey Laurie Hill. Where are our Laurie? So they'll each have a turn. Not tonight. Mr. Grubb will speak tonight, and I think Dan and Laurie will take it up tomorrow morning and they'll have another chair later on. Just before coming into the meeting, we were reminiscing a little bit with Mr. Grubb. And I remember an incident where many of you will remember here. The refs were playing for 10 as a memorial to C.C. Studd. My brother Ivo was number 10 here. And I've got to tell Mr. Grubb what a big advantage it was for Ivo to leave Wales because he's a village boy, been going to London, cities. He's quite a big adventure and he got to London, Highland Road, spent the night there. And the next morning of prayers, Mr. Grubb was speaking and he took Gideon, the 32,000, whittled down to 10,000, whittled down to 300. And he turned to them and he said, if any of you want to go home, you can go home now. That's the old standard, praise God, it's great. So he prayed for 10 and had the 10 and then he could tell them you can go home if you like. I sure regarded that. Mr. Grubb, please. I suppose we should say we're sorry to be late, but we have the bountiful journeys to be to get here and to really arrive as we are now until we're dressed as if we're in the Congo. Well, it's never possible for me to stand here and share in a time with you without saying what I continually say and what my travels over many of the states these days and this deeply renews. But God gave me what is a blessing through two men. I learned, I was free until then, realities which grabbed my life. One was seeking God and the other was these hours. I'm not speaking in any detail about saving lives. All I can say is that while I've been with P.G. Sotheby's I learned total abandonment. I learned not to choose to be a person who eats and lives and has nothing else in life except Jesus and souls. Whole life has just on that one objective. I'm not speaking on that, but that grabbed my life. It took me a few years more to get me there, but it left its mark. From my beloved friend, more than a friend to me, through maybe 30 years, through Charles, I learned a principle of spirit without which human speech would be the weapon today. You know what I mean by the weapon. Well, I've done my research to say, and I might add that this is just to say, I wouldn't say they wouldn't be in existence. They certainly wouldn't be developed as they are today. But I hadn't learned from him the principle of operating the faith, productive faith. It came down to this. Gradually the ways of the spirit, operated by faith, became new to me. So, as David knows, we started up, carrying on the calling of Jesus in that. From what I have learned through this service here, the principle of faith operating on the basis of intercession. I shan't speak of them in any detail tonight. I think I might have a little time to do more about it. I may be able to say a little bit. But I'm only saying that as I continually say to my fellow workers, and fellow CFCers, human speaking workers here, who would not be what they are today, would not be as they were today, if God hadn't taught us the principle of spirit here, the principle of faith, a kind of faith called productive faith. It's also, as I always say of many people, the way the Holy Spirit, I mention this to you too, is using the life of these hounds. They're all known in the faith today. Wherever I go, I tend to find people who hold the Spirit as an equivalent to me in that life. What we have to be is not imitated, but experienced, which is the important point here. So, there are a great many people today who are teaching the same lesson to us, some of us have learned and practiced. Now, for the time tonight, I want to go behind those principles. Therefore, what I'm saying is that the very well-known, the very elementary believers here, that's some of you, and you here, Paul said that he was in a relationship with God, by which he made this way. He said, the same God, I'm talking to the laity, to the mighty in Peter, to the prophet Peter, the prophet Peter, he said, mighty in me, towards the Gentiles, towards the Gentiles. He's not only mighty in him, because he's in him, but he's mighty in him, and the mightiness is being expressed by him to others. This is not real. This is being practiced. Now, that's what I'm really saying, the time that you receive me, is to ask a question which may be interesting, may be simple, may be not. Knowing that I am a good person, that I have a job, knowing that I am a good person, not ought to be too much, but I have, of course, as Paul said, all efficiency in all things, about letting you do the work. In other words, I can't have everything, the power of God operating totally out from me, unless he operates that form totally in me. Because really only whatever comes out of me has always been there. So let's see the reality, which I would personally talk to faith, first of all, in myself, before it can be through me. And just on that, you may say, Paul, you're at an elementary level, I have that established. See, I'm not talking about a partial life, I'm talking about a total life. Paul, in fact, he would have got all, I could do all things through Christ's faith in me. God would make all things abound unto you, and all sufficiency in all things, all. That means there is a total life. Nobody could miss life, a complete life. A life that is totally satisfied, a totally living, and totally in possibility. That's the life. As Paul said, he reigned in life by Christ, reigning on top, top of the region. So I'm talking about that job, where I'm always in possibility, in fact, nothing ever comes from me. That's the life. That's the life. A life that is totally satisfied. So I find that Jesus said, you should believe in me. You should think of me and never hunger again. You should think of me and never hunger again. That's the life. I never hunger and thirst again, do you? I can't hunger and thirst again, I've got a total worth inside you, a total greatness inside you. I'm talking about a total adequacy, and now you're operating, and now you're concerning, is adequacy expressed in coming mighty, in being neutral, and that sort of thing. But that total adequacy can't be completed by me unless you first use me. Is that total adequacy? I mean it, never hunger again, never thirst again, and excited always, no more. But how do people need this? If I find what I find in this book true, if a real person is a person, really a person at all, a person whose price is put by that person, then I first thought, as a young Christian, in essence, what we talk about, while we might be at home, without, take Jesus too. But it hadn't been that long before I came across this description, which is the greatest standard description we've ever seen. And it's a standard one that I think is many words in this book. And that's Galatians 4, 19, when Paul writes it, he says, in a way, do the Lord, it's Galatians, Satan, faith, accept my good children, whom I travel with like the Christ is formed in you. Now, when I read that, I said, I don't know what that means. The implication of traveling with the Christ is formed in you would be not in slavery, but in Christ. Christ said, Jesus said, if I've got a church of Christ in me, isn't my church of me? Isn't my church of me? It's really, I am a person, and in reality, it means not I, there's a church of Christ in me, I am really a Christian of Christ. Which, of course, is what Jesus said, we are the light of the Lord. We are the light. And how do I say I'm light? Because it's a kind of fusion taking place in man's life. If I come in this room, I don't say, I'm a lamp, I should be, because a lamp is special light, you go over a lamp, you're quite a light. So, it's a fusion of light. What is the feeling of light? Are you ever light? Now, that sucks. And it concerns me. I say, something's wrong here, I don't know, therefore I'm not talking to you, this is my fellow Africans. And, so I, even though I was giving a course to visit the villages and so on, I had this search in me. And very briefly, because I'm not taking too long, the Holy Spirit opened my eyes to two radical facts. There was hunger and thirst, of course, and I said, this is your hunger and thirst, I was a searcher. If you are off seeking, knock your foot on it. And when the Holy Spirit did, He called you to be that. What is your theme? Ask a seeker, and find it. I don't believe in being a seeker, I believe in being a finder. I don't believe in a life of need, I like a life of fulfillment. That's my focus. And the way the Holy Spirit opened my eyes to these two facts was very short and it came very quickly to me. But because I had this conscience in that time of this kind of need, a conscience of my Saviour, a conscience of my Lord, I came, I thought I was on par with all of Africa in the years of the Africans, but there was a whole area of need about me. Now, this is not a life of need, it's a life of efficacy. I hadn't got a total efficacy. When Paul said all, all, all, he meant all, all, he didn't mean some, some, some, he meant quite, he had all he needed. So, I hadn't got that total efficacy, I hadn't got a total satisfaction, a total endowment, a total sustenance, I'm talking about and so, of course, I had my needs. And very briefly, at that time, my very great need, of course, I was living out my life in Africa, I said, I needed a quality of love. There was, there was, there were two brothers to my daughter, so I needed some mechanism of love. I said, I needed power to what I was giving to take effect, I'd call it a bit. I said, I needed faith that it could take effect. But I didn't think there was need, there was such a need of love and faith and power and need of my own personal life, sicknesses and illnesses and so on, need, personal need, personal temptation and so on. So, I went to where there was a little bit different in person, I went to get them abroad. I was going to go and talk about stuff in those days and we always spent the first two hours alone abroad. So, it was right and natural to start at six o'clock in the morning and at four o'clock of course, to have that time with God. But that's what happened when I brought those things to Him. Now, the answer became the one that sent me back, put me into a new dimension. The first was, as I felt love, He suddenly said to me, God is love. Well, we all know that. Well, there was always this thing, He doesn't get afraid of something He said to Himself. A picture I've come to, He said to me, the word He said to me, that means that we walk with God all day long and we live. God is love. You know, I said to myself, what's that got to do with me? If God is love like a person, I knew He was. I know now, I know the person He is. I knew He was a good person, a special person. I didn't know I'm like that then. I knew He was all for me. So, I said, if God is love, that means that's a person. Now, they kept telling me this in my little part-time as I sat there and I said, if God said to me, love isn't a thing, love's not a part. I am that love. I said to Him, well, what about me? If you just say, I am, you are the love, is that for me? I said, well, same thing. I said, well, it's the same thing for me, it's the same thing for you. I said, it's the same thing for me. I said, well, it's the same thing for you. it's the same thing for me. I said, it's the same thing I said, well, it's the same thing for me. I said, well, it's the same thing I said, it's the same thing for all of you. it's the same thing for you. Christ is all and in all is Christ. Christ is all. We say Christ has come. That is Christ is all. The Bible says it really radically. Christ is all. There is nothing else except Christ. There is nothing but the form of Christ. Even with evil. There is evil in someone, too, isn't there? But at the moment I began to get the sense of all that is God. I saw He is the love. It isn't the power of God, it's the person. He is the power. It isn't the power of nothing, it's the person. So I began to see He is a one person. But how does He relate to me? And here it was unbelievable. He is the all. How does He relate to me? Then it was the second grace. Christ is all and in all. Do you know what it means to be the flesh and blood? Oh, I see. It isn't my normal God become something and become that thing and become part of it and become His blood. I contain someone with that. I began to see that it is hard work to become something. It never can be, as I have learned. It never can be. So my word transferred my attention from I becoming something to I containing someone. Now you understand, if a person contains Christ, it's not much less effective. You've got all you've got Christ. All is necessary if you know that. But this is the key. The real key of being a person is you are a knower. It's all said that the basis of our personhood. It is the Spirit. God is part of our Spirit. That's why I am. What man knows the things of man, so the Spirit knows it in him. What man knows the things of man, so the Spirit knows it in him. And I say it's my knower. I am. I know. The All-Knowing, the All-Knowing operates what you know. If you know it, you operate from it. If you know it, you operate from your know-how. If you know it, you operate from your know-how. If you know it, you know how to do it. All life operates from what you give your inside know-how. And therefore, when this becomes my fixed know-how, I am the know-how. I am the living being to be split by the humanity. I am the All-Knowing. I am the All-Knowing. And to put that in focus, it was given me at that time an illustration from the Bible, and then added other illustrations to it. The illustration was a vessel. This illustration, because we may say we are more than a vessel. A vessel is put in common terms with a cup, or a pot, or a container. And here the Bible says, you are just a container. I am more than a container. I am a person. I can be any other person at any time. I can be a person, or a cup, or a pot, or a lid, or a cup, or a person. But the point of being a pot, the point of being a container, is to be one of the containers. If you have a cup of tea, the tea is not the cup, and the cup is not the tea. The cup is necessary to the tea, so it is available, but the cup is not the tea. Now, God said, you will get that. You don't become anything. You are a container, or you never will be. Your whole, wonderful being, I pray you, is to be compared to another being, not you. You are just the container which I express myself. So again, I go back to this key point. I can live separate, when I know I have something. I can say, many of you have studied profession. You have studied profession to get inside you. When you were in Africa, with a language, what did you do? You don't try and work by just trying to get the language. You try, first of all. You learn, you have learned the English, the Bengali, and so on. What happens? Three years after two, what did you get used to? Well, I speak natively with my ears. I just talk to you now, I don't want to waste your time. Because it got me. I have never been anywhere. I started with a language, came to go here, and I haven't stopped it. It has become me. It's not as easy as it is now. It's all because of my know-how. You always live life in your own know-how. That's the issue, there's no competency, it isn't you can lead a life practicing by tools out there, it's, oh, I know how to do it from inside. You're happy not practicing, you know how to practice your competency from inside, or you're cooking, you know, a big meal. So, it was inside people what they could have known. So, here's the thing. When, if you don't become, you know, when it becomes the reality to you, you are not you. There's a living Jesus Christ that leads, because Paul says, God, because John says, God told me to lead God. And Paul says, Christ told me to lead. And he goes on to say, well, he says, well, I know that, but what do I do lead? All I've got to do is operate on the know-how. That's what, that's what God operates with you, because he knows how to do it. Therefore, when this is the fact, you operate as a person to the person who is Christ by you. That is my plan. Now, in order to get that figure, you know, to get that book, I learned some strange things. I thought I'd have a sickness if you were to have a nature, if you were to have a nature. If you were to have a nature. And that's still more foolish thinking, you know, about, if you were to have two natures, if you were to have no nature. A nature is that which motivates your personality. We are made to act, to come back, to touch, to practice it. But a nation, what motivates it? What is taken through your appetite to practice it? That's your nature. What's coming through you? What's coming through your human nature? Well, that's what the Bible says. Humans exist. But God is a person who comes through a nature. And every human being is operated by a deity. Which deity? Which deity? And it's coming on that they were a vessel. A vessel. That's what the Bible says. A vessel of mercy. A vessel of mercy means that you contain the God that alone loves you. A vessel of mercy means you contain the Lord Jesus Christ who loves you. That's what the Bible says. A vessel is a vine, isn't it? So that's human. But a vine isn't a nature, is it? The nature of the vine is vessel through the vine. If one were to be a vine, isn't the nature of the vine a nature? And Jesus said, I'm a true vine. That may be kind of a false vine. So which vine is expressing itself like that? It's expressing its nature through me. I find the Bible says there's a temple. There's a temple to the living God. As God has said, I'll dwell in him and walk in him. Oh, the Bible says, isn't it what it says? Isn't there a temple to the idol? No, a temple is not the character. It's the character of the God in a temple. It's a means by which he expresses his presence. The temple is within me. It's a means by which he expresses himself. It isn't that the temple isn't something. It's a means by which God expresses himself. Which God expresses himself by? Is it the satanic God? It's expressing himself through the self-centeredness. Is it the Lord Jesus Christ expressing himself through the self-denial? I find the Bible calls us slaves. That's what I saw back in Romans 6. He said, don't you know, every human being is a slave? A slave always has a boss. He said, every human being to whom you leave a servant, that's your slave, that's your slave with him. You are either a slave to sin or a slave to righteousness. Sin, of course, is the expression of the character of Satan expressed through me. Righteousness is the character of the Lord Jesus Christ expressed through me. In every case, a human is never independent. Now, I may not make a big mistake now. A human will have independence if a human is always motivated by the deity of Satan. So it's true. What came to us from the false was the deity, of course. In order to find real people, we have to find real people. We have to seek alternatives. We don't know life or death, this or that. We don't know life or death, negative or positive, sweet or bitter. We don't know life or death. Life is operating in relation to life or death. Now, that's the supremum. If I'm to be a conscious person, I have to take the supremum. I'm a human. I must love myself. I must be myself. I must be myself. That's what you're here for. Which way? Shall I be a self to self to hell with you? Or shall I be a self to you and I to hell for you? Which kind of self am I? A self which is self-seeking, self-presentation, self-seeking, and that's the end of life? Or is it a self which exists to seek the fulfillment of all the people, God and all the people? So, it's a very effective, very amazing. The world is made of these images, precious. There's not one thing wrong about it. We've been mischievous. Satan's been mischievous. We didn't make it. Satan's been mischievous. Jesus Christ has been wiped to use in the bank for the black marigold. We're beautifully made to be threatened to sin. And the end of our being is we're throwing ourselves into the universe. So, I have to advise what Christ tells of the universe. All things. And what you say to your own humanity. And our destiny is in any of the universe. Now, what's so important is that this invented perfect universe has another God behind it. The God behind the universe is fixed. He loves. That's why he said he can't lie. He's fixed in his inner self. He's fixed. He can't be a liar. Self-giving self. He can't be that. He's fixed. He's fixed in self-giving love. God can only exist by perfect love. He doesn't need others. He judges only from the love. And so, we move in. When you've got an eye for the eye, you see it now. You move in, coming, perfecting the universe. Because the being, this God here, he's here to bring his people into perfection. Now, you see, if it's his eternal purpose to operate by his Son, the cosmic universe can only operate by a particular form. Electricity can't operate except by a lamp to operate by, or light, or power, or something. And yet, the universe must have some form in which to operate. The atom's uselessness has to do with humanity itself. The living Lord himself. Eternal immortalism. It means that he can't measure himself, because he has a son, as a person expresses his purpose. His son and son. And so, essentially, it's two sons. And, I guess, it's as to be the two sons who are fixed in self-giving love as the Father is. Who consist of love. Self-giving love. Who give their lives to other people. That's that. But, for God, it's the other son who gives his life. So, if the Lord and I may, you and I, may become a tree, and two people are separate from the opposite. Not what I could be. A self, a self-getting self. Which is not what we saw in the world. Or I can be a self-sufficient being. And so, the Lord's calling on God's word. He has to find out. And with the two trees. And the two trees tell us a simple fact. They symbolize my two fruits. And the whole point of the fruit of Jesus Christ is this. If you take the fruit, it doesn't matter. And so, the Bible says, the point of having the need to take the fruit of the right tree, is to have eternal life. Oh, we know eternal life from the fruit of the Lord Jesus Christ, of course. So, once we know the fruit symbolizes the Lord Jesus Christ in me, it's taking the right fruit symbolizes the Lord Jesus Christ in me. Taking the wrong fruit symbolizes Satan's in me. Now, that's what Christ is doing. We didn't know Satan didn't. See, Satan is Mr. Self-Seeking, Self-Giving. He's a God that works. He's a God that's self-seeking, self-loving self. He creates this false form of self which exists for itself. He's called a God-servant because he's still God. He's still God's agent. He's still God's servant. We learn that. How to handle God's law. How to handle Satan's law. Lord Jesus Christ. But, he is like that. A God that will take a new kingdom. Self-getting self. And this is the Lord Jesus Christ. And if you're born again, you know it now. He's in eternal form. You were self-assertive, weren't you? Weren't you at all? See, we didn't know. We have another speaker of the team this morning. I was really wondering if there was anything left to say after last night. Let me see what Gloria Hill has to say. Well, I was telling the old, old story. I found only one story then, didn't I? Quite the beauty seems to be. I haven't seen half-time. Now, the shortage that I feel in not being here, it's just another way of the way he's expressed. But, I stand with Norman. And I know that as I stand with Norman. Therefore, I find no shortage here. Forty-six years ago, that became a fact in me. Fifteen years ago, it began being a fact in me. For thirty-one years, in me. There was no shortage. In me. Because Jesus Christ lived in me. It's strange. And yet it isn't. But all those thirty-one years were filled with Christian people. With Christian studies. With four years at it. But God signed for me when fifteen years ago. That there was no shortage in me. And he had a very wonderful way. To prepare me. To know that. And Christian work. And, um. That I live by. Is given. When you are thinking of the requirement being out of your flesh. It produces. Vastly results. It made trouble, of course, with my children. And with my husband. It made too much trouble. People outside my own family didn't know me. And I was able to fool all the people outside my family. I think I was anyway. Maybe I wasn't. And it seemed as if. It came from my flesh. That needed. And I needed to have that actuated. So I went on all those thirty-two years. And at a certain time. One of my main works failed. I'm telling you. You said that. Not to me. Logging up the days that I was away. And telling everybody that. By the time I got back. He would have legal grounds. We had worked very hard to raise our children. Our oldest daughter rebelled. At seventeen. Well, I couldn't take that. You know. From my first response. When I fortunately didn't do that. All my reactions at that time were. Totally negative. You see, I was thinking. That I. Was somehow. A trinity in myself. Now, I didn't think of it that way. I knew about the trinity. But the trinity at that time. Was outside me. I thought. The trinity that I really experienced. Was one right here. It was me. And evil. And good. And I thought of myself. As being. The one who had to try to control. The evil and the good. That was here. Going on in me. Good was here. I knew that. Because I knew a lot about. Good was there. And I knew it. But. I also believed. That he was evil. And that. It was my job. To control these two. Well, you see. When this. Daughter. Had the audacity. I could see. That my trinity. Hadn't worked at all. I had not been able. To maximize good. And minimize evil. In my first. So I was. Disappointed with God. And. I had very little. Hope left for the future. Because I had. Just about. And I knew. I seemed to be. More willing to work. And. So I had come. To the strange conclusion. That I was. The best. So now. You know. God. Treated me that way. It seemed like. A rank. Unfairness. And I was. Very disappointed. About that time. I began to hear. What he said. What he said. Three. Years. And I felt like. Six months later. It was really. The first thing. That had ever happened. Managed to. Escape. Everything. That looked like. It might. Have happened. But this was. During. Those six months. Or maybe. Four months. At that time. I had been listening. To Norman. I listened to him. Through his letters. To my heart. And listening. To that. Established. Two facts. In me. Not the whole truth. But two facts. So that when. The attempt. At suicide. Came. My reactions. Were quite. They were. Drawing total. Control. Therefore. What's happening. Is surprising to me. The. Whole experience. The wholeness. Of that time. It was acting. It wasn't acting. On our daughter. Hope. She was continuing. To say. For me. That. It. Cloud out. When. The second. Tribulation. I began. To see. Therefore. Being justified. By faith. Through our voices. By faith. Into the grace. Where it went. And we stand. And rejoicing. So. But regrowing. Tribulations. Also. Knowing that. Tribulation. Work of patience. And patience. Experience. And experience. Hope. And hope. Make us not ashamed. Because. The love of God. Is shed abroad. In our hearts. But I knew. I did have. The peace. But I didn't even. Have any ability. To stand. In truth. I wavered. To wobble. And I did not. And I began. To see God. Not only in. And as I saw God. He had. Patience. Experience. Find somebody. And you. Ring them up. On the phone. And we began. To relate to each other. And having the very thoughts. Of God. So my. Unlimited hope. For this moment. Which was really. The important thing. I never known. How to. Confident. Having you. This is. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was able to let that jealous, those jealous movements, and I kept them there for a while. I was non-identical for quite a few years, and I saw him do things. But my attitude toward jealousy was just, well, it's there, and I went to sleep, stayed in a motel. And there was a woman sitting across the table, a jealous woman, and me. And I awoke, and he said, well, what's my jealousy of? He was in situations as... Our service this evening, singing hymn number 362. Love divine, all love excelling, joy of heaven to earth, come down. Fix in us thy humble dwelling, all thy faithful mercies crown. Jesus, thou art all compassion, pure, unbounded love thou art. Visit us with thy salvation, enter every trembling heart. 362. Prayer and worship. In 1933, that's history for most of you, I came to this college, and among the speakers was Mr. Grubb. And it's an amazing thing to think that all these years we've remained friends. 1933 to 1979. Today I had the joy of driving him up and chatting to him about the whole day's wonderful... And tonight I've got the joy of opening the meeting for him. So I'm not going to take up any more time, but give him the maximum time. We'll sing, he wanted two hymns, so we'll sing another hymn. And I would like a better translation of this hymn, they've altered it. You know Bunyan didn't write these words, but he wrote words with a bite and a snap in them. However, these are the words we have of Bunyan's great hymn. Number 522. 5-2-2. As we have them here. He who would valiantly against all disaster, let him inconstantly follow the Master. There's no discouragement shall make him once relent his first avowed intent to be a pilgrim. Who so beset him round with dismal stories, who but themselves confound his strength amores. No foes shall stay his might, though he with giants fight. He will make good his right to be a pilgrim. 522. I like the words of that hymn. They're true. There is no discouragement shall make him once relent. No foes shall stay his might, though he with giants fight. He will make good his right to be a pilgrim. I like positive things, positive hymns, they're positive facts. This is a meme. If the so-called overcomer made his very best in me, and I'm in that union relationship with him by which I operate, as he, I'm on top too, I'm not on top. I'm expressing, I'm an agent expressing the on-top person. That's what I'm talking about. I don't believe in a either defeated or defeatist life. I believe in an on-top life. We, um, say that Goliath, for the wealthiest, suddenly returned to never. He's done that, hasn't he? I don't ask that again, do you? Once he's come, he's come. That's why I'd like to see him again and say, thank God, that's a fact. That's the basis of why we're here, isn't it? To go out equipped into whatever is the next stage of the Holy Spirit operating by me. But he has to operate in me before he can operate by me. And I take him to times of training, such as I had myself in earlier days, and with others who have dealt with us, the field of times of establishing ourselves in who we really are, as good as we really are, the almighty God operating by me. That's a strong thing, isn't it? That's really the elementary of the gospel. A great many of our songs are hymns of aspiration. They should be praises, shouts of aspiration, of realization. I don't believe in living in aspiration. I believe in the fun of living in realization. Because who makes me realize it? He didn't make me. He came to make me realize it, didn't he? Paul said, I know whom I have believed. He had to believe first. I know whom I believe. And persuade yourselves of themselves. The persuasion and the knowing of the prophets and the believers. The prophets and the believers, he didn't say, I believe, I believe. I know, I know, I know. One of the most striking things to me in the Scriptures is the kind of rooftop of the letters of the Scriptures of 1 John. It's the top, top level. We are, we walk as he walks. In the light as he is in the light. We know as he knows. In love as he knows. As he is, so are we. Isn't that something? That's 1 John 4, 17. As he is, so are we. Not ought to be, shall be, one day, and are not. Am I? I'm an ammer. Not that we'll hope we'll be. Because if he's an ammer in me, I'm an ammer also. If I'm in union with him, I'm an ammer. You know, very close. As he is, so are we. In this world, not this world. And I'd like to say the interesting thing is, the last phase he takes you through, 1 John, is we believe as he believes, but you find he turns it to no. And you find that our last two things, we know who we are, we know who he is, we know we're known. No, no, no, no. Knowing isn't believing. Knowing is when believing is dissolved and has become knowing. Affirmation becomes confirmation. And then life's fun, isn't it? It must be fun if I've got a totally victorious Jesus Christ in me. How could it be else? Because he always conquers everything, including the devil. So I don't worry about the fact of the devil. I don't even bother about the devil too much. I see him conquered all the time. And the only time I don't see him conquered is when I'm foolish enough to see him as he's not conquered, which is a lie. He has been conquered. He has been conquered. And I'm foolish. If I see him as he isn't conquered, then I'm down low level. I don't believe in low level. I believe in top level. If he sees me in heaven's place, then I'm there, aren't I? I didn't seek his help there. He put me there. It's his fault. He shouldn't have done it, no? So why shouldn't I? There's no way he'd put me. And therefore when the devil comes up, I say, devil, I'm not seeing you any longer. You were finished 2,000 years ago and I said to you, you're finished. I'm watching you get out now. That's how I confront unsaved souls. I say, that person, I say, Jesus Christ saved that person 2,000 years ago. And I say, devil, you've got the right type of person. I'm here by faith. I'm praying by faith. You've got him, Jesus Christ, and I watch him become yours. So I turn my praying into praising. Great fun, a good release too. I've lived for years on this statement that I first caught these things through Mr. Howells here. I first caught it through V.G. Southampton, where there were two Holy Ghost men I knew. It's good to know Holy Ghost men, so long as the Holy Ghost isn't getting you too, that's all. You don't live by imitation, by impartation, that's all. I've lived with two Holy Ghost men. Slightly uncomfortable for the time being, but it might be comfortable a little later on. When the same person operated them, operated me. I was going to say, the scripture I got, the word I got when I had to largely through the Holy Spirit had to come on me to take the place of C.G. Southampton. She had to come on, I call him Samuel, I do the old plight of saying Mr. Samuel. Had to take the place of Mr. Lee Southampton. I believe in personal, I believe in personal agency. If Paul only had one name, why should I have more? I'd like to see Norman. I'd like to go back to scriptures, you see. I don't believe in Mr. Reverend Sopperthorpe. I believe in brotherhood. When you're in brotherhood with a person, if he's respected, you respect him. You don't respect because of the title, you respect because of the appreciation that's pleasing people. I was very glad of the man you had down here from Wex just recently. He's a man God's seen lately. He's had to come through, that's Neil Rowe. He's taken on the leadership of Wex down here. Only 30 years ago he said, I've seen finally, didn't I? It's Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, God in me. He's seen it. And we talked about authority because they brought a word in. I never allowed the word director into Wex. I thought a little bit of, I'll do something, I'll push you a bit. So we stuck to the word secretary. And now in this last generation, they put the word back director so forth applications. And he makes it out to just be a title. It may be a title to you, it may be a title to everybody. He said, I said the word, he said, I have no power and all power. I like that, I have no power and all power. Because he doesn't pretend to have power, and all praise Jesus, but the God in Christ has all power. And I still haven't given you the scriptures that came to me at that time. It was that sentence statement made to those who entered the first list, coming to me, they will never be late, I will give you rest. Move you to the second list, take my yoke upon you. Be a co-winner, a co-savior, a co-worker with me. Share the power, share pulling the power with me. Take my yoke upon me, and learn of me, from meek and lowly and harsh, meek and lacking in yourself. He said the person was meek and lowly, a perfectly meek person, a notorious person. Jesus Christ said nothing in me. It's the Father in me. Humility has not been there at all. To be humble is just there to be proud, it's still self. Humility and pride, there's no self there, it's only Jesus Christ, there's no other self. That's why you couldn't see Jesus Christ, it's only for the Father's good. And when he said that, that's when he said, learn of me from meek and lowly and harsh, my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Well, of course, the word yoke is hard to pull, it's the equivalent of pulling a plough, hard work. Well, it's easy to pull a plough, and the burden is heavy, doesn't it? The so-called poet, he said, whenever you feel your plough hard to pull, you're off beat. Whenever you feel your burden heavy to pull, you're off beat. Because when you're on beat, I'm the plough puller, you're just the old ass along with the big bull, that's all. You're the only donkey going along with it, that's all. And burdens, who carries burdens? The government upon your shoulders? I'm sorry, the government upon your shoulders? The government upon his shoulders. He's got good, strong, and square shoulders, operating even through my political shoulders. So I've had that for 40 years, I've had that. If ever I feel that burden heavy to carry, or that plough hard to pull, it's nothing to me. I don't mind being open when you know where the beam is. It took me years to find the beam. When the beam is upon me, I know where to find the beam. I don't mind that diversion, I know where to come back. I don't mind going to the side if I know where the main road is. That highway, Holden's, there's a whole quiet city, Holden's, there's a whole quiet city, that's Holden's. There's a whole quiet city, that's Holden's. And you know where the whole road is, I don't mind the diversion because it's a good place to come back. And I'm going to tell you, isn't that what we're here for? You're here to know who you are, which can only be, of course, when the preacher told you who you are. And when the preacher told you who you are, he says, you're out and I'm in, that's what he tells you, the chiefs, the chiefs. There is a day to go to the preacher now, there is a day to go to the preacher, for other people, that's what we're after. There is a day, of course, for other people, that's what we're after. There's a day you don't go to the preacher, that's the one he did for you, you move into and it's changed. That's what these men of the Bible found out, didn't they? They went through a period where they died and God replaced them, that was chiefs, and from there they operated from that basis. They don't operate to that basis, they operate from that basis. As I say, I can see that in the two main events, much to me, I can see the Holy Ghost operating behind them, you'll get no better, I know there in history, in Hebrew history, any better description, Father Holy Ghost does settle himself finally, any better description you get in Mr. Lee's house, like when the Holy Ghost settled into him, it's tremendous. But he does it in his own way to all of us. If he discipleship means you're finished, doesn't it? We're not to be disciples, we're to be apostles. A disciple's a learner, an apostle's a person having learned to do the stuff, we're to be the stuff-doers, not the learners. So far through, I learned those phrases in Lee's house, from school of faith to love of faith. If you want school of faith, look for it in school of faith, where you've got to cut off everything. When you start cutting, take pictures, take your father and your mother and your wife, Oh, Jesus is tough. Boy, when you get there, get your father, your mother, your wife, your children, your house, get your land, your old life also, unless you forsake all you have, you can't be a disciple. Funny thing is, when you do forsake all you have, you get what you want back again, on another level. You see, until I forsake them, they're there for me. After I get it back, I'm there. So you get the whole world back, because it used to be the old life, the world for me. When that's gone, it's new to the world, it is gone. Supposedly, the whole world is yours. Supposedly, that's the whole world we are. Because when God's in you, when God's in you, you're only being your friend. You're the other lover. God's the other lover, not the self-lover. And you're that, and this is the drive of your life, that's the Holy Spirit's drive. And then you have another kind of course, that's the course of the glory. That course, unlike affliction, which is what the number of books told me, is far more key in your head than the course of other people. The course of second Corinthians, that's the course of second Corinthians, the course of other people. The course of Galatians, the cross for you. And you can crucify with it, and dead to the world, and so on. And you leave that behind, you pass from Galatians into Cross, and then you do a big jump in Ephesians, and you sit down. Thanks very much. And you've got there. Isn't that a wonderful life, isn't it? So, you see, I thought to say a little about that last night. Because this is the subject, the learning, to be settled in. Committed, you know who you are, now go and meet. Apostate is a saint one. A disciple is a person in preparation to be a saint. So you move from discipleship to apostasy. When you're a good person, and now, all this is, it's because it's all taken by you. So we talked a little bit last night about that learning process. I've quoted what I did last night. There's two verses. I'm crucified with Christ, in which I live, yet not I have a Christ that lives in me. Life I now live in the Christ, I live in the Christ, as long as God will love me, and save me from all this. That's kid stuff, I've been here behind. So the Bible puts us in three grades, doesn't it? The Bible preaches that little children and young men are fathers. Little children are kids, they're starting. Young men are part of the secret. Fathers are operating it. Little children and young men are for my self-development. Fathers follow me. Crucifixion, resurrection, it's set me in. As Satan is told, you'll go down from me, you'll buy me dollars. Christ is Moses, Christ is Joshua, it's always the issue inwardly related. Christ is Melchizedek, and you are called Melchizedek, because that's what the high priest calls us. That's indivisible. And what he's saying is, you can't really, freely be in the third level, until the first two levels are settled and left behind. Like in life, you can't take up your profession until you've graduated. Or whatever level you had to graduate, which means you're supposedly competent. At least you know how to handle your stuff. You may have been the architect, that's another matter. But you basically know how to be the teacher, or the lawyer, or the chef, or the carpenter, or the mechanic, or cook. You know your stuff. Now you operate it. You may have been the architect, that's another matter. That's what we call competence, isn't it? And our competence is to be people who are not in a way where the Holy Ghost operates in my house. Fixed, known. Unchanged. Call him the Holy Spirit. Call him God. Call him Jesus Christ. All deities are Jesus. None of this is. I don't even have to say it. John said, God knows it. Paul says, Christ knows it. And they don't say the Holy Spirit, but you know it, because the one who made God the Father, the Son, and the reality too. So I don't want to go, I don't want to go back. Oh, and I'm gay. It's just my first night. Oh, and as I say, I don't think you'll get through, or have got through to that, without certain prepared, certain prepared operations of the Spirit. That's called the negative operations in preparation for the positive. It's just the same. You can't have faith, and talk about, Lord Jesus Christ, and Jesus Christ, but repentance from God, can you? You have to have negative operations to find your lost sinner before you're ready to recognize he died 2,000 years ago for you. So there is the negative area, the preparatory area, which can lead you to the positive. And, of course, this last negative area I talked about is the self itself. You see, I talk about capacity. Your self is replaced by another self. And the real self isn't you. Poor you, you're done. I have a book called, Once Caught, No Escape, and I've tried 50 years to escape, and can't. So you think you can enjoy being a slave, don't you? It's a trade with Jesus. You're caught. You're driven. And driven is wonderful. But, um, so I said, and I go to the reason must be, you would be an adequate person, you see, God operates by us. You get that in the foreground, don't you? He is not in the foreground. You're in the foreground. The universe is never in the foreground. It can only be expressed by some form which is, some form in the foreground which expresses itself. So I said, yes, you cannot say that this has been here long ago. The only way for the agency, the expressed agency, which can come out of light, come out of power, you can see, when it operates, it only has to come through an agency. I say the atom has been here a long time, I say it is, since the beginning, mainly since the beginning of the universe, it comes out in the foreground. This is called the norm of power. We investigate, we call it atomic power. So the invisible, almost, I say, intangible reality of the, we generally call it the atomic reality, it can only operate when it comes, an operation of a certain form. And that's why the father had to have a sign in the deity. He couldn't be a maleficent father if he had himself as a son, by which he could be self-manifested and the spirit comes through a sign of reproduction. Father comes through. And what I'm saying to you, you level, I level up the sons. We come halfway, co-sons. Not ashamed of course, brethren, isn't that something? The uncreated son levels up with the created son, saves the created son to level up to the uncreated, on the level of the uncreated son. Isn't that something? Brothers, brothers. That's why Paul said, I pass the third stage, he said. He said, I pass through a stage when my old self-righteousness comes speaking to me, what is of gain to me when I've lost my price as my saviour. Then he said, I went, second discovery, I caught the way he put it in three. He said, Oh, yea, doubtless, I can't alter it but not to be excellent to the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord. Oh, he's not very much saying he's my Lord, he keeps me over. Excellent to the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord. To find that he had suffered lots of other things. So he said, there is an area of suffering where self is replaced with Christ in the centre. I'm not saying my dad self-disappeared, because there is a minor, the temple is very minor compared to liquid disease. The temple is very minor compared to God manifesting himself. The branch is very minor compared to the violent spirit. So you go to such a minor place you almost forget yourself. Because the great major fact is you're near to your being. Now to get that Lordship, Paul had to suffer. So there is a place to have that, whatever form of self-reliance you had, it cost at that time. It cost. So in the second area, you see, first I'm saved by grace. Second, he owns me. Seeking Christ Jesus my Lord, who has suffered lots of things, all things. But the glory is, when he was gone, the things that it cost him to lose, it would cost him to keep. I shall have this nailed to me. What it cost him to lose, it would now cost him to keep. He saw a verse and he said, I couldn't stand having to think of the world flesh and dead. They stink to me. He was very rude. He called me dumb. You know, Paul is not always a very polite person. Nor am I, I hope. You see what I mean? Well, he saw a verse. He said, I'm possessed by new wealth and I work for Jesus Christ. I work for Jesus Christ and he produces another life. Another life can become the redeemed son that I'm become. Part of the glory of his inheritance. This is the work of his inheritance in the faith. His inheritance, not mine. You see, Paul got such a reverse. What cost him to lose would cost him to keep. That's the third level. That's when he moved out of graduation into the expression of the God brothers. You know, meet and greet the expression of the God brothers. That's what kind of hit me so hard when I first got to see his start. Very simple man. Of course, he's gone the way God told him to go in his boat. A young man, a great preacher. Then when he in China give himself to the Lord, see the cathedral, of course, and sell all his money. All he had to buy. Everything he sold out. So he became God's best man. We're just now bringing up the second book of his salvation writings. It's named Fool and Fanatic. That's what you are. You know, if you follow it, you just completely don't take any respect for it. If you remain respectful, it's not there. You'll become a fool and fanatic. In the eyes of a believer, not only a believer, but a non-believer, half the believing church would crucify you as well as the non-believing. In fact, the non-believing church doesn't bother about the believing. The believing church would crucify you. Disgrace no man. Wreck no man. Reap no man. And then, and uh, uh, uh, uh, as you move in those directions, the whole area turns. And when I first got to study, it was difficult to live with. Very likely to sleep at night. He had no interest except Jesus Christ, loving Jesus Christ, eating, drinking, taking Jesus Christ as his brother at once. He lived for it. Can't say he wasn't serving him night and day. He never had any door in his bedroom. Any precious act would come in any time and he would come and pray for the Lord and go to 2am or 4am or whatever they like. He was out for people having the same spirit in them within him. Which had to come through the painters and the same thing the painters got and then the recognition there now, people really, uh, uh, expressed Jesus Christ, expressed that human spirit. And he said, should you believe me because he learned it both ends. He couldn't bear Jesus talking, taking Christmas, he said Christmas day, poor people's gospel. He couldn't eat turkey on Christmas day. He went out to take Jesus out to other people. He couldn't, he never took a vacation, didn't have a vacation. Or couldn't people live with him. His vacation was constantly going outside here. But he had fun serving Jesus. I tell you, it hit me as a young man because when icebergs meet the fire, either the fire goes out or the iceberg melts. And fortunately the iceberg did melt after a year or two. The fire still burns. And then, then the water comes boiling. That's the kind of man. So I tell you, of course there's others in here. I don't remember, I don't, I don't forget the action on here. Mr. Howard of Leicester, I don't know why he's guided to it. He certainly had great guidance at the time he was like me. You see, I never heard of him. He came to Cheswick in 19, 19, 1928. And he marched up to a room there and I mentioned before he was a big man. I said, oh, there's a big man coming here. And he had a big wife still living. She was living too. And he told me about what he was supposed to have done in the college. I didn't know about the college. I had heard of him having a revival. Vaguely, I had heard that he had a revival. I said, why didn't you? Well, I'm the sort of cautious, frightened Englishman. He said, would you come and visit me in college? I said, no, I'll get out if I can. I'll stay, I won't do it. Good, Christian on the street. So, I sent that in July and then September came round and I thought, well, I did say I'd go, I'd better go. So I went. I tell you, I used to hear people just walking in those days, he did. I don't know why it took me that long to come in and walk. As he walked, a spirit streamed out of him. I've heard the spirit. I've never heard the spirit like this before. He was a spirit-seeking man. Oh, I'm done for. I'm sold out then. It wasn't so difficult for me to go along with him because I'd already learned a few lessons about going down the stunt which is good preparation. So I, I have to tell you, I tell you, I tell you, you're a privileged priest, you know. I tell you, I don't know other Bible schools who believe in the Holy Ghost. I don't. I don't mean terms. It isn't, there are precious terms. Baptism, there's baptism of power and power of blessing. I love being around the Pentecostal because they're alive. People, people who've only had the Bible and haven't had Pentecost are usually half dead. So I talk much better to people who've got the Holy Ghost as well as the Bible because the Bible to you, the Bible to you is a useless way to tackle me and say you're not true. But the Holy, the people who have the Holy Spirit hear the echo. So I love to be with those who have the Holy Ghost in present gifts. But what I said to him, and I told him, don't talk half way. Don't talk half way. The gifts were, the Holy Spirit beautifully awakened within himself in the form of gifts. At that time, all you would take in a gift would be trouble, would be something which was He in a gift. But in order to get you into focus, at the time being, it appears that maybe the gift is more than the person. You've got to go back to the person. You live by the person himself who is the giver of all the gifts. He's the whole lot. When you've got Him, you've got a lot. A lady said to me, she said, Mr. Rob, can you baptize the Holy Spirit? I didn't know what she was after. And I said, yes, I have prayed to the Lord. I said, I don't baptize, I don't baptize Him. I'm a Holy Ghost alcoholic, I said. Too late. And, oh, she said, have you spoken to God? If yes, tell Him, I'll die. I live by the yes out there. My life is a sharing jack-of-all-trades. If you send Him from there to kill me, He'll keep me alive. That's the decision. She never, He never did come home except for further, because her glory was in this way, to share with Him, hoping to get God to deliver her. That's it. It's rare, it's not there, it only happens here and there. it's His eyes and He, He, and He is the God to save you. I'm giving you the highest privilege. That's why I always say, the highest scripture I know in the Bible, I have an apostle, a Bible student myself, is the one in Isaiah 53, I think the first sentence, it says this, it pleased the Lord to bruise Him. Not blessing. When you're a kid, you want blessing. When you're grown up, you want to be bruised for Jesus. It pleases the Lord, it's God's mercy. I'll take a few blocks for me. Please, isn't that lovely? Then you go down to the old place, you run. You're meant to run, you'll be fed. We'll finish this meeting with a prayer. What? I was supposed to say to the God. Anybody feel they'd like to pray? Thank you, Lord, that He was able to put pride and all He thought He knew on one side, and let the Holy Spirit take over. And Lord, we thank You that tonight we've seen the result of it. You're sending Him around the world to tell people that it pays to trust God. It pays to stand aside and let the Holy Ghost take over. It says, work for everyone, but we can't do it in the flesh. The flesh can't please God in any way. Only the Spirit. And so God, we pray that this term, many of us may really see what it is to be full of the Holy Ghost, that He may take complete control of our lives. Believe, Lord, that this is what You raised the college to do, to send out vessels full of the Holy Ghost to all parts of the world, so that when the Spirit is poured out, there'll be the centers where He can come through, when the great revival comes. And Lord, we want to be in on Thy great plan. And so bless us tonight, Lord. Thank You, Lord, for keeping Mr. Grubb alive all these years, and using him to open people's eyes to how sinful self is, how unpleasing to God the whole man and the self-nature is, and how wonderful it is when the Spirit lives in a person. So bless us tonight, and may there be a great outcome from this meeting. We ask You for Jesus' sake.