In this sermon, the preacher discusses the tragic events that unfolded in Israel when Absalom, the son of King David, sought revenge for the violation of his sister Tamar. Absalom plotted to have his brother Amnon killed during a feast by getting him drunk and vulnerable. The preacher emphasizes the importance of not giving in to lustful desires and advises waiting until marriage for sexual relationships. The sermon also highlights the emotional turmoil experienced by Tamar and the consequences of Amnon's actions.

2 Samuel, chapter 13. Let's just jump right into the chapter, verse 1. Now, after this, it was so that Absalom, the son of David, had a lovely sister, whose name was Tamar. And Amnon, the son of David, loved her. Amnon was distressed, or was so distressed, over his sister Tamar that he became sick, for she was a virgin, and it was improper for Amnon to do anything to her. Some people have the mistaken notion that dysfunctional families are kind of a product of the 20th century. You would be hard to find more messed up families than you find in the pages of the Bible. But the reason for dysfunctional families, both then and now, is the same. People don't do what God tells them to do in their family life. I'm not trying to say that you have to do it perfectly, but if you ignore what God tells you to do in your family life, it's going to be messed up, on one level or another. God said, in Genesis, that his plan for marriage, from the very beginning, was that a man should leave his father and mother and be joined unto his wife, and that the two would become one flesh. He didn't mean, and the two should become one flesh, and then the husband takes another wife, and then the husband takes another wife, and then the husband takes another wife. That's what David did. At this point in the life of David, he had, I don't know, five, six, seven wives. I can't recall the count exactly, but it was many. And one of the reasons why God commanded that this should not be so was not only for the sake of the marriage itself, but also for the sake that it is a very unhealthy atmosphere in which to raise children. Now, we see this in our own day and age. A good number of my counseling appointments are made with people who are still smart from the effects of a parent's divorce in their life, or still are trying to figure out how it all works when they're the old kid in the family, but now there's a new family, but then married to another family, and new kids come in, and it all becomes very complicated and very messy. Well, this is some of the same dynamics going on in the life of David's family. We're introduced to three people in verses one and two. You have Absalom, the son of David, you have his sister, who must have been a beautiful young woman, said the lovely sister, whose name was, I've been saying Tamar, and I probably will. It's undoubtedly incorrect pronunciation. You'd probably say her name Tamar. A's are always pronounced, never A in most other languages, but ah, and so undoubtedly Tamar, but forgive me, I'm just in the habit of saying Tamar, so I'm sure I'll say that mostly tonight. You have Absalom and Tamar, who are brother and sister. They were the children of David through David's wife, Machah. Machah was the daughter of the king of Gesher, a small nation, not very far away from Israel. And so David married this princess named Machah, and she bore him at least two children, Absalom and Tamar. Then we have a third person that we're introduced to in verses one and two, this man named Amnon. Now, Amnon is of some note among the sons of David, because though David had many sons, by the way, many of the ancient rabbis tell us, and I don't know if we can say this conclusively from the scriptures or not, but many of the ancient rabbis say that Tamar was David's only daughter. He had many sons. Again, I should have done a little bit of research and been able to give you an exact number. Seven, eight, nine sons, something like that. But at least the ancient rabbis tell us that this was the only daughter David had. Well, this young man, Amnon, of all David's sons, one of them had to be the oldest. One of them had to be the firstborn, and it was Amnon. Amnon was the son of David from his first wife, Ahinoam the Jezreelitist. Well, excuse me, that wasn't his first wife. His first wife was Michael, but he didn't have kids with her. But well, you understand what a mess it is from beginning to end. The first wife that he had children with. Now, if Amnon is the firstborn and David is the king, what does that make Amnon? The crown prince. He's in line for the throne. That's how it works in a hereditary monarchy. The eldest son becomes the inheritor of the throne of Israel or whatever the nation is. So we have our three people, right? Absalom, Tamar, brother and sister. Then you have Amnon, who is half-brother to both Absalom and Tamar, because they share a common father, David, but they have different mothers. And then we have the complicating verse in verse one, where it says, And Amnon, the son of David, loved her. Now, there's no doubt that Amnon longed for Tamar so much that he became lovesick. But it certainly isn't any kind of love that we would want to emulate today. You know, love is a pretty broad word, isn't it? You can use it to apply to a lot of things. And this is no genuine love that Amnon had for Tamar, as we will see later on in the text. Now, what made it more difficult? And you see how hard it was for Amnon in verse two. He was so distressed over his sister Tamar that he became sick. I mean, he's just lovesick over this woman. What made it even more difficult was that she was a virgin. Now, what that meant was she was available for marriage, right? Because she was not married to anybody else. So she was available to marriage for marriage, I should say, but not to Amnon. Why wasn't she available for marriage to Amnon? Because it's her brother. It's not that complicated, is it? By the way, the Bible expressly forbids in the law of Moses marriage between half-brothers and half-sisters. I will say this. The Bible does not, and I almost raise this, I am regretting it, even I'm thinking of it, but since I've started, I almost feel like I have to finish it. Just by way of biblical instruction, I must tell you that the Bible does not expressly prohibit marriage between cousins. Now, there may be other reasons for not marrying between cousins if there's some genetic danger or something like that, but one time a couple came to me and they were married and they were cousins and they asked, they said, are we in sin? And, you know, you just look through the pages of the Bible and it does not forbid marriage between cousins. And I had to say, listen, as a faithful pastor, I have to tell you, I'll speak where the Bible speaks and I'll be silent where the Bible's silent. There may be other reasons why it may or may not be wise for cousins to marry, but you can't say there's a biblical command against it. And so that instructed them. But clearly, half-brothers and half-sisters, the Bible does prohibit marriage between the two of them. Well, it says that he loved her, but marriage was forbidden unto Amnon and Tamar. By the way, before we go on to verse 3, it's ironic the meaning of their names. The name Tamar means palm tree. And the idea behind it is fruitfulness. I mean, you know how big and fruitful palm trees become. We've got a palm tree in our backyard that grows these huge clumps of, I don't know what it is, palm seeds or dates or whatever it is they grow. And the idea is fruitfulness when it says palm tree. The name Absalom means his father's peace. The name Amnon means faithful or stable or stability. The ancient commentator John Traft says, none of them answered their names. Verse 3. But Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah, David's brother. Now, Jonadab was a very crafty man. And he said to him, why are you the king's son becoming thinner day after day? Will you not tell me? So Jonadab said to him, excuse me, Amnon said to him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister. So Jonadab said to him, lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when your father comes to see you, say to him, please let my sister Tamar come and give me food and prepare the food in my sight that I may see it and eat from her hand. Now, this man that we're introduced to in verse 3, this fellow Jonadab, it describes him there in verse 3 as a very crafty man. He's a very wicked man, is what he is. His wicked advice to Amnon began a disastrous chain of events. Now, what's interesting to this as well is Jonadab was a cousin to Amnon and Absalom and Tamar. He was a cousin to them because he was the son of one of David's brothers. But this man was no friend to Amnon. He was a spiritual enemy to him. He was concerned about the condition of his body. Amnon, you're wasting away. What's wrong with you? Oh, I'm so lovesick over this girl. He says, well, I'll tell you how to trap her. Did you see what he said to his friend there in verse 4? Amnon said to him, I love Tamar. Isn't that interesting? You know, as this chapter will bear out, he did not love Tamar at all. Amnon lusted after Tamar and he called it love. He certainly isn't the last person to do this. And lust often presents itself or masquerades itself as love. I want you to see what else he says that's fascinating here at the end of verse 4. He says, I love Tamar, my brother, Absalom's sister. Can we do a little reality check here? If she is your brother's sister, then she is your sister. But he can't bring himself to say those words, can he? He can't bring himself to say Tamar, my sister. Because that would activate his conscience, at least just a little bit. We can't have that now, can we? It's fascinating and frightening, really. The way that the power of lust is strong enough to twist the way we see reality. That's what we see in Amnon. Amnon, who is that attractive young woman over there? Oh, that's Tamar. She's my brother's sister. Wait a minute, Amnon. Isn't that your sister? No, she's my brother's sister. You see, it's twisting reality in his mind. Lust has that power to do that. Did you see the advice that Jonadab gave to him? Lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. Well, men sometimes are good at doing that. You know, milking a little bit of... You could say he was ill, right? I mean, look, he's getting thinner, he's lovesick, blah, blah, blah. Jonadab tells him, milk it for all of you can. But he told Amnon to deceitfully arrange a private meeting with Tamar. And you know what I find fascinating about this in verse five? There's no mention in verse five. Well, OK, and then force yourself upon your sister. He doesn't say that, does he? He doesn't need to. These wicked minds are thinking alike. All he has to do, well, arrange a private meeting for yourself and Tamar. And Amnon goes, oh, OK, well, then I know exactly what I'll do. I'll force myself upon her and I'll disgrace her. And in this, Jonadab and Amnon, they're thinking the same wicked thoughts. Verse six. Then Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. And when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, please let Tamar, my sister, come and make a couple of cakes for me and my sight that I may eat from her hand. What a baby. You know, here he is. Oh, I can only get better if my sister comes and makes me a little breakfast in bed. And David sent home to Tamar saying, now go to your brother Amnon's house and prepare food for him. So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house and he was lying down. Let me take a little break right there just to observe one thing about the shrewdness of Amnon's plan here. You see. Amnon knew that his father was indulgent. So he makes a childish request of his father. What should David have said to Amnon? David, the warrior. David, who has endured a thousand times worse and a thousand times more painful difficulty in his life, those 20 years on the run from Saul. Don't you think David spent some of that time sick? And probably so sick with the flu or nausea or whatever that he could hardly walk, but he had to keep going to stay out of Saul's way. David was a hardened, battle tested warrior. He was an indulgent father. And instead of picking up Amnon by the scruff of his neck and saying, you can start acting like a man. You're the crown prince of Israel. What do we have a little baby for the next king? You're not going to get better until little sister comes and makes you food. Get up and act like a man. David never did that. We see him over and over again as an indulgent father. Why? And it may well have been, and we admit that we're speculating just a bit here, but it may well have been because he felt guilty. Guilty of having so many wives and so many children and so many responsibility of state that he couldn't be a true father to any of his children. And so he deals with the guilt by being soft and indulgent towards his children. You know, sometimes you see it today when you have a father who just has partial custody or visitation with his son or his daughter. And the small amount of time that he does get to spend with them. He's so overwhelmed with guilt because he's not with his kids more than he just indulges them. Everything. This is the kind of dynamic going on in the life of David, by the way. Again, before we move on it, I think it's also fascinating how Amnon took Jonah dabs, wicked advice quickly and completely. Isn't that amazing? Don't have spells at a wicked plan for Amnon to do. And Amnon just does it. Now, don't you wish people would respond to godly advice in the same way? Isn't that funny? Somebody's given godly advice and it is, well, you know, let me pray about that for about three weeks and, you know, maybe and this and that, the other thing. They're given wicked advice. And what is it? I'll do it right away. Bad example for us. So David sent home to Tamar, verse seven, saying, now go to your brother Amnon's house and prepare food for him. Now, again, this is what Amnon wanted. Why is he alone with Tamar? Because David commanded it. You see how manipulative Amnon is to bring this request through his father? He's covering himself. It's almost as if he's trying to implicate his father in it a little bit, too. And maybe that'll help with the cover up. Well, dad, you sent her. Clever, clever and wicked young man. Verse eight. So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house and he was lying down. Then she took flour and kneaded it, made cakes in his sight and baked the cakes. And she took the pan and placed them out before him. But he refused to eat. Then Amnon said, have everyone go out for me. And they all went out from him. Then Amnon said bring the food into my bed, into the bedroom that I may eat from your hand. You big baby. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made and brought them to Amnon, her brother, in the bedroom. Interesting. Everything he told David was a lie. It was all just a ruse to be alone with Tamar in a situation where she would be at a great disadvantage. Verse 11. Now, when she had brought them to him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, come lie with me, my sister. And she answered him, no, my brother, do not force me, for no such thing should be done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing. And I, where could I take my shame? And as for you, you would be like one of the fools in Israel. Now, therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you. However, he would not heed her voice. And being stronger than she, he forced her and lay with her. Can you imagine how horrific those words must have sounded in Tamar's ears? Come lie with me, my sister. She never expected it. Who could expect or excuse such a thing? And so he makes this wicked suggestion and his evil heart reveals itself and he admits his incestuous desire as he makes this wicked suggestion to Tamar. It seems like Amnon was a spoiled prince. He always took what he wanted. Can you just see him growing up? Mommy, I want that. And he gets it. Daddy, I want that. And he gets it and he gets it and he gets it. And so now when there's something that's denied to him by nature, by God, by every standard of propriety, he can't obey those things. And he turns against them all and he says, well, I always get what I want. And so I'm going to take this to no matter what the cost. Now, Tamar, for her part, look at her great nobility. Did you see what she said? She said to him in verse 12, do not do this disgraceful thing. I mean, it was evident that Tamar was evident to anybody what an evil and disgraceful thing this was. Why couldn't Amnon see it? Amnon couldn't see it because he was blinded by his lust. You know, it was his lust that made him say my brother's sister, not my sister, blinded by his lust. He could not see what would have been evident to a thousand out of a thousand other people that this was an evil and disgraceful thing. And then Tamar continued on, she says here in verse 13. And I, where could I take my shame? As for me, you'd be like one of the fools in Israel. Tamar wisely asked Amnon to consider the result of his desire, both the result for her and the result for him. What would be the result for him? Well, it would shame her. And no one should live under that cloud of shame. No one, no one at all. Not even Tamar. And for Amnon, it would reveal him as one of the fools. But blinded by his lust, Amnon won't see the inevitable result of his desire. Amnon, it can turn out no other way. Shame upon this life. Foolishness stamped upon this other life. Evident to anyone, blind is Amnon, blinded by lust. Maybe I should just again hit the pause button here and say this. Friends, do you see why Paul said in First Timothy, flee youthful lust? You don't mess around with them. You don't take one step down that road. You see, you think you can handle it. You think you can have a controlled amount of lust in your life. I'll allow this amount. You know, it's probably what everybody allows. So it's no big deal. That's what you tell yourself. And so I can control all this. Can you see what the scriptures say to you tonight? You can't control it. Not because it's impossible, but because blinded by lust, you will become unwilling to control it. Think of horrible and wretched pedophiles and such. Do you think they begin that way? Not at all. But they get blinded by their lust and caught in a vortex that they can't stop. Well, again, I can't say that it's impossible for them to stop. It certainly is possible. But their blindness makes them unwilling to stop it. And that's why the scriptures say, flee youthful lust. Not even one step in that direction. Now, it's interesting what Tamar said in verse 13. He said, she said, I should say, now, therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you. Well, isn't that interesting? She said, hey, listen, just ask the king and he'll arrange we'll get married. Now, I think that at that moment. Tamar knew that this wasn't going to happen. I think she said it just as a way of pulling out all the stops. You know, if she could just stop him here and delay it or something like that, then maybe she could be rescued in this situation. Maybe the ploy would work, but it didn't work. Because it says he forced her and lay with her. Friends, this was nothing but rape. Nothing but rape. Verse 15, then Amnon hated her exceedingly so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And Amnon said to her, arise, be gone. Doesn't that reveal Amnon's attraction for Tamar as for just what it was? It was lust and not love. Amnon was attracted to Tamar purely for what he could get from her, not about of any concern for her. Now, it is true that there are many lustful relationships where there is a combination of lust and love. But in Amnon's attraction, there was only lust. It warns us about the power of lust. It warns us about allowing our heart or mind to pursue any lustful direction other than it upon the spouse that God has given us. And in his single minded lust, the sad thing is is that Amnon only built upon the example of his father, David. David was never this dominated by lust, but he was pointed in the same direction. I mean, his multiple wives show that his sin with Bathsheba displayed the same direction. Listen, David never raped anybody like Amnon did, but but his his feet were pointed in the direction of uncontrolled lust. And what Amnon simply did was he took the direction that David was pointed in and he walked a few more steps down the road. This is often how, as the Bible says, the iniquity of the father is visited to the children of the third and fourth generations, not in some kind of, you know, unavoidable curse that's passed on, but because children often emulate their parents. Amnon did. A child will often model a parent's sinful behavior and go further in the sinful direction that the parent is pointed in. Is that sobering for you and I? Let's take it and look at it in the fullness of life here. You know, dad, that that that lust that you have, that you're not dealing with before the Lord, just imagine your son in your same direction, taking it a few more steps down the road. That's scary, isn't it? You know, you could say moms, you know, the the I don't know, whatever would be anger, bitterness or whatever it could be. Think of your daughters taking it and taking it a few steps down the road. Now, it's not inevitable. It's not like there's some curse upon them that forces them to do this. But it certainly is a commonly repeated dynamic. It's such a vivid phrasing here in verse 15, where it says that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her. And then had no real love for Tamar, only lust. And so immediately after the deed was consummated, he immediately felt guilty over his sin. Tamar was just there. And when he saw Tamar, he saw all of his guilt and all of his foolish sin. And so he wanted every reminder of his sin put away from us. Get out of here, woman. When I see you, I just see what a weak and horrible man I am. Get away from me. Mind if I read to you a paragraph from Chuck Smith's work on this chapter? I think it's appropriate. He says, let me give a friendly, fatherly tip unto all of you young girls who may be in the position of Tamar in that you have some fellow who's really pressing hard to have sex with you. He is the soul of kindness. He's very attentive. He calls all the time. He opens the door for you. He brings you flowers, but he's pushing hard for a sexual relationship. Don't give in. If you really love him, make him wait until you're married. If he really loves you, he will over and over time. And again, the fellow will press and press until he has taken you to bed. And that's the last you see or hear from him. You're no longer a challenge. He's conquered and he's off for new conquest. If you really love him and want him, make him wait. If you really love God, love yourself. Make him wait. It's good advice. So verse 16, and she said to him, no, indeed, this evil of sending me away is worse than the other that you did to me. But he would not listen to her friends. What a dramatic scene. Can you just see the tears streaming down from our space, the quiver in her voice? She's been disgracefully violated without any fault of her own. And now what she says is true. I mean, she's a brilliant young woman. She says this is even worse. You see, my friends, there were provisions in Israel. That when an unmarried man did this to an unmarried woman, the way he made it right was he married her. And to us is you can't do this. You can't just put me away. I mean, you said you loved me, right? Just get away from me. And tomorrow rightly says this is worse. This is worse than what you just did to me. You see, he could have somewhat redeemed the situation by either marrying her or, as Exodus puts it, paying the bride a price in accordance with the instructions from the scriptures. But he would do neither. It says there in verse 17. Then he called his servant who attended him and he said, here, put this woman out away from me and bolt the door behind her. Now she had on a robe of many colors for the king's virgin daughters wore such apparel and his servant put her out and bolted the door behind her. Can you imagine the sound of that door bolting in the ears of Tamar? It says she tore her robe of many colors. Remember hearing that phrase in the book of Genesis used of Joseph? The idea isn't so much of the color of the robe. The idea was that it had long sleeves and a long hemline. It was the kind of garment that you would wear if you were a person's status and privilege, like a princess. You wouldn't be doing much work in that kind of robe. And so the implication was other people do the work for you. So she tore the robe, she was put out, treated so disgracefully. My friends, Tamar deserved better treatment as an Israelite. Amnon had no business treating another Israelite this way. Tamar deserved better treatment as a relative. They're blood relatives. She deserves better treatment than this. Tamar deserved better treatment as a sister. You can even say that Tamar deserved better treatment as a princess. And isn't that some way for us to look at one another in the body of Christ? You know, that next woman that you mistreat in one way or another, she's a child of a great king. You are mistreating a princess. Despite all of that, Amnon spitefully treated her. Look at it there in verse 17. It isn't put this Israelite out. It isn't put this relative of mine. It isn't put this sister. It isn't put this princess. It's put this woman out. Verse 19. Then Tamar put ashes on her head and tore her robe of many colors that was on her. And she laid her hand on her head and went away crying bitterly. And Absalom, her brother, said to her, has Amnon, your brother, been with you? Just stop right there. First of all, Tamar correctly treated this as a calamity, and she did not hide the truth that this terrible crime had been committed against her. She did not give place to the voice of shame that would somehow tell her this was somehow your fault. Isn't that a terrible thing? That that voice of shame comes upon many women who have been disgracefully treated in some way like that, and that voice of shame comes to them and it tells them somehow that this was their fault in some way or another. God bless you, Tamar. You didn't give into that. She went out basically telling I've been mistreated. I've been abused. I've been treated disgracefully. It wasn't my fault. And I know it. God bless you, Tamar, for not giving in to that voice of shame. I think it's also fascinating what Absalom said in verse 20. Has Amnon, your brother, been with you? Now, think about that. Here he sees Tamar coming, her robe is torn, not that she's immodest in any way. She looks like she's just a wreck, disheveled and such, ashes upon her head. She's beside herself. And the first thing he thinks to say is, has Amnon, your brother, been with you? You see, Amnon probably thought that he had hidden his lustful desire for Tamar. You know, he's cool. He knows how to play it cool, right? Yeah, nobody can see this. He's pretty smart. He probably thought that he had concealed his crime. Nevertheless, it was so obvious to Absalom that he immediately knew that Amnon was responsible. It was no mystery to him. Oh, Tamar looks like that. Must have been Amnon. See, part of the blindness of lust leads a lustful man or a lustful woman to believe that their actions are not obviously apparent to other people. And Amnon was deceived by this. It says there again, verse 20. Absalom, her brother, said to her, has Amnon, your brother, been with you? But now hold your peace, my sister. He is your brother. Do not take this thing to heart. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house. What's her name mean? Palm tree, which signifies what? Fruitful. She never had kids. She lived in Absalom's house, just as like an old maid, if you will. Very sad. Now, the other question I think that needs to be asked here. Why didn't Tamar go to David? Isn't that interesting? Again, we're speculating at least in part here. But I don't think it's going out on a limb to say that Tamar knew that David tended to be indulgent with his sons and that he would excuse all kind of evil in them. So what's the use of going to David? Well, God will vindicate Tamar. Isn't that beautiful? First of all, she's vindicated by the scriptures. Right now, reading it tonight, is there any doubt who's right and who's wrong here? God has vindicated Tamar, and he will vindicate victims of this. He absolutely will. And might I say, God will punish Amnon. You better believe he will. And we believe that God will deal with those who sin in this way. Verse 21. But when King David heard of all these things, he was very angry. Yeah. What are you going to do, David? I mean, at least you're going to sit Amnon down and give him the tongue lashing of his life, right? No. Well, but he was angry. I don't like this one bit. No, this is no good. But he didn't do anything to protect Tamar or to correct Amnon. Maybe David was conscious of his own guilt in a similar matter, and he felt like he didn't have any moral authority to make a rebuke here. But if that was the case, it's a great miscalculation on David's part. You know, David had every justification to go to Amnon and say, listen, Amnon, I know the evil that results when we don't restrain our lusts and affections. This is something that you have to address and that you have to conquer in God's strength. David had every reason, every justification for doing this. But you can't help but think that when he saw Amnon, what did he see? He saw himself. You know, it's funny, isn't it? Isn't it funny how in your head you sound a certain way when you speak and then you hear yourself on a tape recording or on a video camera and you go, ooh, is that what I really sound like? And they say you never hear your own voice until it comes back to you from a recording. Well, certainly you could say that a man never sees the worst of himself until it reappears in his child. Now you hear Absalom here in verse 22. Absalom spoke to his brother Amnon, neither good nor bad, for Absalom hated Amnon because he had forced his sister to mar. Absalom will play it cool. This is tough. You know, there's nothing more unsafe to trust than the guy who hides hatred with a smile. That was Absalom. Hey, Amnon, how are you doing? Nice to see you. All the while thinking, I hate you and I'm going to kill you. Welcome to the family of David. Verse 23. And it came to pass after two full years that Absalom had sheep shears in Baal Harazor, which is near Ephraim. So Absalom invited all the king's sons. Then Absalom came to the king and said, kindly note, your servant has sheep shears. Please let the king and his servants go with your servant. But the king said to Absalom, no, my son, let us all not go now, lest we be a burden to you. Then he urged him, but he would not go and he blessed him. Then Absalom said, if not, please let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said, well, why should he go with you? But Absalom urged him. So he let Amnon and all the king's son go with him. Sheep shearing time was a time of great celebration. The money was coming in. It's harvest time if you're a sheep rancher. And so you throw big parties, you know, it's a great time. And so Absalom said, now I'm going to throw the barbecue to, you know, beat all barbecues. Goes to dad. Dad, come on out. No, no, son, I don't want to be a burden to you. Isn't that wonderful? You know, adult children, their parents, they don't want to be a burden to you. No, no, no. Well, please, dad. No, no, no. Well, then, dad, have Amnon come. You know, if the if the king can't be there, then let the crown prince come. David says, why do you want Amnon there? Oh, please, dad. OK, he'll go. In those two years, Absalom never stopped plotting his revenge. And he's cunning. Oh, he's cunning. I don't know who is more cunning in this chapter. Jonadab, Amnon or Absalom? Probably Absalom is the most cunning of all. Because how did he get Amnon to the party? He asked David. So why is Amnon at the party? Because David sent him just the same way that Amnon got Tamar or David, I should say, to allow Tamar to come and bring the food. Verse twenty eight. Now, Absalom had commanded his servant saying, watch now when Amnon's heart is married with wine. And when I say to you, strike Amnon and kill him, do not be afraid. Have I not commanded you be courageous and valiant? So the servants of Absalom did to Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's son arose and each one of them got on his mule and fled. They're thinking maybe Absalom is going to wipe out all the king's sons, so they get out of there. I have this picture in my mind of all these little mules, you know, skipping away from the feast. What a what a blood. Guys, this is more like the Godfather than the Bible. Can you believe this? People don't appreciate the Bible for what it is. Can you see Absalom? They're cool as a cucumber. All right, let's get him drunk. And when he's flying high, he's going to be unsuspecting. And you go and you strike him down. I don't want any mess ups and I don't want him squirming around on the floor. You strike him and you strike him dead. Don't let your hand be weak. All right, boss. And at that moment, when Absalom gave the signal, strike Amnon, they did it when he was dead. There's Amnon. Maybe he's a little bit nervous about being at this feast. A little bit nervous, but Absalom's smart. Fill him full of wine. Give him to relax. Pretty soon he's laughing and drinking. A man dominated by his lust like that. You know, he drank like a fish. You know, there is Mr. Party Time. Amnon always loves to have a great time. And there he is. He's flirting with the girls around him. A man, a leopard can't change his spots until the command came. Strike Amnon and they did. God promised David after his sin with Bathsheba and Uriah that the sword shall never depart from your house. And this was a partial fulfillment of the promise. Again, from John Trapp, who wrote his commentary in the 1600s, I believe it might have been the 1500s. He said, as David had committed adultery, made Uriah drunk and then murdered him. So Amnon committed incest, is made drunk and then murdered. Verse 30. It came to pass while they're on the way, the news came to David saying Absalom has killed all the king's son and not one of them is left. Can you imagine how David thought? You know what he thought? He said, that's what the prophet said. He said, the sword would never depart. This was it. They're all dead. So the king arose and tore his garments and lay on the ground and all of his servants stood by with their clothes torn. Then Jonah dabbed the son of Shimea. David's brother answered and said, I hate this guy. He answered and said, let not my lord suppose they've killed all the young men, the king's sons, for only Amnon is dead. For by the command of Absalom, this has been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar. Now, therefore, let not my lord, the king, take this thing to heart to think that all the king's sons are dead for only Amnon is dead. You know, if I'm filming this, Jonah dab is such a worm that he's saying this and yawning. Don't worry about it, David. They're not all dead. Just Amnon. You know that thing where he raped Tamar? Well, you know, it's out of retribution. Oh yeah. Well, why did he ever do that? Jonah dab, you gave him the wicked counsel to do it. Might I say God has a special judgment, a special condemnation upon those who give wicked counsel, who cause other people to stumble. You want to send your own soul to hell? Go ahead. But for you to give wicked counsel to others, to lead them into sin as well. Jesus said, for any of those who make one of these little ones to stumble, it would be better for them if a millstone was tied around their neck and they were cast into the depths of the sea. I'm not wondering, or I am wondering, if it's not true that Jonah dab is the blackest heart in this chapter. Then it says, then Absalom fled. What verse are we at here? Verse 34. Then Absalom fled, and all the young men, and the young man who was keeping watch, lifted his eyes and looked, and there many people were coming from the road on the hillside behind him. And Jonah dab said to the king, look, the king's son are coming, as your servant said. So it is. Don't dislocate your shoulder, patting yourself on the back there, Jonah dab. So it was, as soon as he had finished speaking, that the king's son indeed came. They lifted up their voice and wept, and the king and all his servants wept very bitterly. Friends, it's a great, great tragedy that befell Israel on that day. David was rightly grieved at learning of the death of his oldest son. This was the crown prince, the man who was going to inherit the throne of Israel. Friends, I say this without condemnation towards David, but I think it's a true insight that David was in part responsible for the death of Amnon. If he would have corrected him, he probably could have prevented this murder. If David would have properly corrected Amnon, then Absalom would not have the same ability to nourish his grievance. If David would have administered biblical correction according to Exodus 22 and Deuteronomy 22 and say, OK, Amnon, you either marry or pay the bride price. This is what the law says. Then Absalom would not have felt as free to administer his own brutal correction. But David didn't. But we have to say. In the big picture, Amnon got just what he deserved. We don't pity Amnon in this one bit. Oh, yes, there's sin on Absalom's part. He is a murderer, no doubt about it. But the only innocent one in this chapter is Tamar. She's the only innocent one. David, he's got his problems in this chapter. Amnon, it's evident. Absalom, you better believe it. Jonah, don't even get me started on him. But Tamar, she's the only only one who is innocent in this chapter. Verse 37. But Absalom fled and went to Talamai, the son of Amminahud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day. So Absalom fled and went to Geshur and was there three years. And King David longed to go to Absalom, for he had been comforted concerning Amnon because he was dead. Now, there was an institution in Israel known as the cities of refuge. Have you ever heard of that term before? The cities of refuge actually formed a very sophisticated system of legal protection for a man who killed another man accidentally. The whole scenario is that, you know, let's say you're chopping down a tree and the axe head flies off the axe handle and it hits a guy in the head. Well, in those days, you could count on it that the dead man's relatives were going to come gunning for you. And how could you keep them from looking at this and saying, well, look, he was murdered, everybody can tell it and them coming and killing you, you would flee to a city of refuge and that a city of refuge, which was a Levitical city, they would take you and protect you and the high priest would hear the case. And if you were guilty, he would throw you back outside the city. But if you're innocent, you live the rest of your days inside of that city of refuge protected by the walls of that city. So why didn't Absalom flee to a city of refuge? Because they were only for the innocent. He was guilty. He goes to a foreign country. Remember, his mother was a Gesherite. And so he goes to the land of his mother's family. And so he stays there three years. And David, well, David pines away for Absalom. After three years, the sting of Amnon's murder wasn't so sharp anymore, was it? And David just wanted to be reconciled to Absalom again. But he had no desire to correct his son for his evil. Let me see if I can lay out a little equation for you. David didn't correct Amnon when he did evil and Amnon ended up dead. David has not corrected Absalom when he has done evil and Absalom will end up. Well, that's for the next time we're together. Friends, I guess the overshadowing lesson from this chapter is that the power of lust has felled better men and better women than you and I. It's not something to mess around with. Get out now while you can still think clearly. Until you become so deceived like Amnon, that you would look at Tamar and say, well, she's my brother's sister. Instead of seeing reality for what it is. Lord God, help us to do that. Guide us on your path, Lord. Oh, keep us, Father, from the deceitful power of lust. Keep our hearts longing and desire after you and channeled into the great and appropriate ways that you've given for us. And bless your word to us, Lord, not only in what we understand, but in the spiritual ministry that you bring by your word as well. We lift this before you, Jesus, in Jesus name. Amen.