Forgiveness and Freedom From Bitterness

Most Christians struggle with having difficulty in forgiving others who have sinned against them. They may even feel justified to be better against them sometimes when they seemingly have purposely been harmed by them. However the Bible insists that our prayer life will be void of power when our relationship with our fellow Christians is marred because of an unforgiving spirit within us.

In his book, Prevailing Prayer, D.L. Moody writes that most Christians lack power in prayer because they have allowed the root of bitterness to spring up in their hearts. “It may not be easy,” he writes, “to live in sweet fellowship with all those with whom we come in contact; but that is what the grace of God is given to us for.”

Moody continues on this subject by saying: “The disciples’ prayer is a test of sonship; if we can pray it all from the heart we have good reason to think that we have been born of God. No man can call God Father but by the Spirit. Though this prayer has been such a blessing to the world, I believe it has been a great snare; many stumble over it into perdition. They do not weigh its meaning, nor take its facts right into their hearts. I have no sympathy with the idea of universal sonship--that all men are the sons of God. The Bible teaches very plainly that we are adopted into the family of God. If all were sons God would not need to adopt any. We are all God’s by creation; but when people teach that any man can say, ‘Our Father which art in heaven,’ whether he is born of God or not, I think that is contrary to Scripture. ‘As many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.’ Sonship in the family is the privilege of the believer. ‘In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil,’ says the Apostle. If we are doing the will of God, that is a very good sign that we are born of God. If we have no desire to do that will, how can we call God ‘Our Father’?

“Another thing. We cannot really pray for God’s kingdom to come until we are in it. If we should pray for the coming of God’s kingdom while we are rebelling against Him, we are only seeking for our own condemnation. No unrenewed man really wants God’s will to be done on the earth. You might write over the door of every unsaved man’s house, and over his place of business, ‘God’s will is not done here.’ If the nations were really to put up this prayer, all their armies could be discharged. They tell us there are some twelve million men in the standing armies of Europe alone. But men do not want God’s will done on earth as it is in heaven; that is the trouble.

“Now let us come to the part I want to dwell upon: ‘Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us.’ This is the only part of the prayer that Christ explained. ‘For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; but if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.’

“Notice that when you go into the door of God’s kingdom, you go in through the door of forgiveness. I never knew of a man getting a blessing in his soul, if he was not willing to forgive others. If we are unwilling to forgive others, God cannot forgive us. I do not know how language could be more plain than it is in these words of our Lord. I firmly believe a great many prayers are not answered because we are not willing to forgive some one. Let your mind go back over the past, and through the circle of your acquaintance; are there any against whom you are cherishing hard feelings? Is there any root of bitterness springing up against someone who has perhaps injured you? It may be that for months or years you have been nursing this unforgiving spirit; how can you ask God to forgive you? If I am not willing to forgive those who may have committed some single offence against me, what a mean contemptible thing it would be for me to ask God to forgive the ten thousand sins of which I have been guilty!

“But Christ goes still further. He says: “If thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath aught against thee; leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. It may be that you are saying; ‘I do not know that I have anything against any one.’ Has any one anything against you? Is there some one who thinks you have done them wrong? Perhaps you have not; but it may be they think you have. I will tell you what I would do before I go to sleep tonight; I would go and see them, and have the question settled. You will find that you will be greatly blessed in the very act.

“Supposing you are in the right and they are in the wrong; you may win your brother or sister. May God root out of all our hearts this unforgiving spirit.

“A gentleman came to me some time ago, and wanted me to talk to his wife about her soul. That woman seemed as anxious as any person I ever met, and I thought it would not take long to lead her into the light; but it seemed that the longer I talked with her, the more her darkness increased. I went to see her again the next day, and found her in still greater darkness of soul. I thought there must be something in the way that I had not discovered, and I asked her to repeat with me this disciples’ prayer. I thought if she could say this prayer from the heart, the Lord will meet her in peace. I began to repeat it sentence after sentence, and she repeated it after me until I came to this petition: ‘Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us.’ There she stopped. I repeated it the second time, and waited for her to say it after me; she said she could not do it. ‘What is the trouble?’ She replied, ‘There is one woman I never will forgive.’ ‘Oh,’ I said, ‘I have got at your difficulty; it is no use my going on to pray, for your prayers will not go higher than my head. God says He will not forgive you unless you forgive others. If you do not forgive this woman, God will never forgive you. That is the decree of heaven.’ She said, ‘Do you mean to say that I cannot be forgiven until I have forgiven her?’ ‘No, I do not say it, the Lord says it, and that is far better authority.’ Said she, ‘Then I will never be forgiven.’ I left the house without having made any impression on her. A few years after, I heard that this woman was in an asylum for the insane. I believe this spirit of unforgiveness drove her made.

“If there is someone who has aught against you, go at once, and be reconciled. If you have aught against any one, write to them a letter, telling them that you forgive them, and so have this thing off your conscience. I remember being in the inquiry room some years ago; I was in one corner of the room, talking to a young lady. There seemed to be something in the way, but I could not find out what it was. At last I said, ‘Is there not someone you do not forgive?’ She looked up at me, and said ‘What made you ask that?

Has anyone told you about me?’ ‘No,’ I said, ‘but I thought perhaps that might be the case, as you have not received forgiveness yourself.’ ‘Well,’ she said, pointing to another corner of the room, where there was a young lady sitting, ‘I have had trouble with that young lady; we have not spoken to each other for a long time.’ ‘Oh,’ I said, ‘it is all plain to me now; you cannot be forgiven until you are willing to forgive her.’ It was a great struggle. But then you know, the greater the cross the greater the blessing. It is human to err, but it is Christ-like to forgive and be forgiven. At last this young lady said; ‘I will go and forgive her.’ Strange to say, the same conflict was going on in the mind of the lady in the other part of the room. They both came to their right mind about the same time. They met each other in the middle of the floor. The one tried to say that she forgave the other, but they could not finish; so they rushed into each other’s arms. Then the four of us--the two seekers and the two workers--got down on our knees together, and we had a grand meeting. These two went way rejoicing.”

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Mike Balog

Twas a good read Mike. Even though the story is about people we see. What of God? I know of persons who are bitter towards God. These are Christians who have been thru the mill so to speak and they are bitter towards God because of it. I am sure they don't hate God, they can't understand Him.

Of course the remedy is to come to God, out of frustration they come, not understanding anything, their world is darkened. They talk to Him, they give it all to Him, yet they come away still bound by it. They feel the rejection, the alienation. They ask themselves questions, "something is deeply wrong, am I bitter towards God?" They begin to think are all the trials that they have failed resulted in a rejection sticker. They trudge along day to day wondering if their creator has left them. They are sick of sin, they cling to the cross, yet they sense that something is still wrong with thier relationship with God. Their soul feels bitter, empty and parched. They have prayed that God would reveal the wickedness in thier heart. They love God but something is there that is not right between them and God. They have repented, spent hours in prayer and tears, sometimes into the night. They don't know of anyone that they have offended, but they've prayed that He let them know.

What would you say to these miserable Christians?

Yea, it's a good article. Thanks Mike.