48 - Years of Faith

“THESE ARE YEARS of faith,” is a notation in Mrs. R.’s wide-margin New Testamentⁿ, dated July 23, 1921. While it is true that the just must always live and walk by faith, it is equally true that there are times when because of special trials they must exercise special faith. Particularly is this true of one who is called of God to be a leader in His work. So it was, the years of 1919 through 1922 were “years of faith” for this servant of the Lord. Unusually severe trials, both in the work and in her personal life, beset Mrs. R. whereby she was called to exercise greater faith. It was a period when by God’s permission His vessel “went through a great valley of losses in everything.” Note: This New Testament originally belonged to Mr. Robinson and bears his signature and Montreal address. Some clue as to the nature of these calls for faith may be gathered from the various notes and entries which Mrs. R. made throughout the New Testament which she used at this time. Taken together they form something of a spiritual diary for this period. Especially enlightening are the sub­jects listed for prayer. These include her personal needs, spiritual and physical, incident to her call and ministry, her co-workers, the Homes, and other vineyard workers. The Waukegan work, it will be remembered, was launched in 1919. This was indeed a venture requiring faith—faith over the young people who were called to undertake this ministry, faith for the supply of the material needs of the work and the workers, faith for souls to come in and to have their needs supplied. In connection with this, much instruc­tion had to be given requiring much time and labor. And while the missions in Racine, in Kenosha, and in Milwaukee (which was opened in 1921) were not her special charge as was Waukegan, Mrs. R. felt a keen interest and responsibility for the young ministers laboring in these cities, for after all they were her own children in the Lord. Another call for faith was for the various needs of the Faith Homes. For one thing, during this period there was a severe and prolonged financial test. As a result, there developed an atmosphere of unbelief on the part of some of the workers which doubled the fight of faith, and this attitude of doubt had to be overcome, first of all, before God could supply the material needs. To accomplish this, Mrs. R. had to have faith that those lacking in faith would be given it, and this necessitated her teaching them in order that the obstacles might be removed and their faith built up. “Now then,” Mrs. R. wrote one of her associates in this connection, “the atmosphere at the present time is like this: ‘We can’t run this work by faith.’ “If you give way to that, as a set of vessels, we are done for. You can’t run this work by anything but faith. Unless run by faith it will go to the wall. For it is a miracle of faith that we do run this work. No supplies of an ordinary mission are here. Unless we look to the Almighty, it is simply nonsense to talk about running this work. “I mean we have to be more in faith when we are pressed and not get discouraged. The harder the battle, the better we must fight, the more clear we must be, I mean—the more simple. . “I don’t believe we are in any place of letting down our faith. In the matter of Faith Homes, I felt faith. We are in some kind of a ‘bump’ that we will get out of if there isn’t too much fuss, and talk, and heads, and no faith. Discussion always weakens faith, and that is one reason, until faith was pretty well established, the Lord didn’t try for financial conferences. He made the vessels prove we could live by the offerings, and not until then were there conferences con­cerning the finances of the work.” In this situation faith again was the victor, and God saw the Homes over the “bump” and showed them His glory. And as a result the faith of all waxed stronger. These were also “years of faith” in behalf of the needs of some of Mrs. R.’s loved co-workers who became involved in fierce, spiritual battles incident to their call and ministry. In behalf of some of these she was called to fight a great fight of faith that they might “stand perfect and complete in all the will of God.” Such labor was by far one of the largest, most important, parts of her ministry and necessitated hours of soul travail and hours of teaching, which in turn meant hours of waiting upon God for the needed preparation to enable her to teach each one “in all wisdom.” Often it was necessary to give the same teaching over and over again—”precept upon pre­cept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little.” Naturally speaking, this can be a tedious, sometimes thankless task. “A minister ought to be patience personified,” Mrs. R. said once. And she was just that as a teacher. Only those who have been engaged, even to a small degree, in a ministry like this can begin to know the sacrifices in­volved—the cost in time, in effort, in spiritual substance, yes, and in the physical strength. (For example, Mrs. R. some­times worked all night, as indicated by a pencil note at the end of a letter: “It is now 5 A.M. This was a teaching letter to a minister in dire need and consisted of more than seven pages of single-spaced typewriting.) And only those used of God in a teaching ministry such as this can appreciate to the full the joys realized over vic­tories gained in such battles, and, alas, the sorrows over de­feats sustained when individuals fail of the grace of God. Such failures are painful in the extreme, and Mrs. R. knew many heartbreaks of this kind. To Mrs. R. the result of many of these failures was far more than simply sorrowing over another’s loss. Ofttimes she, too, suffered personal loss in the losses of her companions “in tribulation, and in the kingdom and patience of Jesus Christ,” for it is a cardinal law of the kingdom that if one member of the body of Christ suffer, “all the members suffer with it” (I Cor. 12:26). Of course, had Mrs. R. chosen to do her own will, she could have refused to bear these burdens of others. That would have been a far easier path for her to walk. Then she might have been able to devote herself to more spec­tacular and seemingly more valuable and permanent forms of Christian service—conducting campaigns, writing, a min­istry of healing—which would have gained for her a greater name and more popularity. Instead, she chose the will of God and so “fulfilled the law of Christ.” A beautiful, powerful locomotive may be able to race at record speed on a clear track between Chicago and New York, for example, but this is really of no practical value. The usefulness of a locomotive lies in its ability to haul— passenger or freight cars. Its speed decreases in proportion to the load, and the possibilities of trouble developing in­creases proportionally to the cars added. Occasionally an engine is given a load that is nearly too great for it, and so it has to all but stop. Thus it is in the Kingdom of God. Spirituality does not exist for itself, and certainly not to reflect glory on its pos­sessor, but for the glory of God and to help others reach the Goal. In the process of bearing another’s load, one may seem to lose his own life, but the words of Jesus were never more true than in such circumstances: “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it” (Mark 8:35). In the course of these battles the archers of the adversary shot at and “sore wounded” this brave and valiant soldier of Jesus Christ. Consequently, these years also became years of faith” for physical healing and divine health. In the fall of 1920 the enemy attacked Mrs. R. with an illness designed to be fatal. One of less fortitude would have be­come an invalid. It was a most painful, tumerous condition. Never before had she had anything like it. As she looked to the Lord about her condition and for instructions as to how to fight this battle, she received no light or word at all. This silence on the part of the Lord only added to her perplexity and trial of faith. “Jesus did not run to the rescue,” commented Mrs. R. afterwards, adding that sometimes He helps people most “by making them walk” by naked faith for a time. Later the Lord explained to her that all this was permitted of Him to see if she would have any choice of her own, would “want to die” rather than to live, a temptation to which she could have easily yielded had she been less consecrated than she was. The fact was that there were many circumstances connected with her call and ministry which were most dis­couraging, so that “Heaven looked very inviting, and earth pretty dark.” And the Lord allowed her to abide in darkness for the time being, simply staying herself upon the Lord, desirous only that Christ should be magnified in her whether by life or by death. As the conflict continued and she received no word of encouragement, she began to wonder if perchance God saw the struggle was an unequal one and, under the circum­stances, wanted her to “go home.” If so, she was perfectly willing for that. While she pondered this possibility in her heart, the Lord asked her, “Don’t you feel it’s rather cowardly to want to get out of your trouble that way?” That gave her the clue as to God’s desire for her. Im­mediately she began to fight the good fight of faith for her perfect healing. For many years after her first miracle of healing in 1899, Mrs. R. had walked in divine health. At length, however, as a result of some terrific physical on­slaughts, her light of Christ as her Health had become a little dim so that when she became the victim of this subtle at­tack of the enemy, “she was floored” for the moment when she realized her loss in this respect. But now “she began to ask God to restore to her what she knew of divine healing or divine health and to put her in her office she had in being always well, always strong. She fought to win the memories of how she launched and walked in the strength of Christ.” “The renewals” of these lights were granted to her eventually, so that once again she was enabled to live “in the faith of the Son of God.” Meanwhile, however, the thing which helped her to persevere was “the years of fortitude, of believing for health, of being able to stand in the strength of Christ, and do a great deal on the basis of faith.” “The power to really ignore facts and to see life and health in Christ” provided “the holdover” till the healing was won. Throughout the winter of 1920-’21 Mrs. R. “simply lived by faith” even though she was “near death” much of the time. But when the pain would be very great, the Lord did not have her pray for healing. Instead, He called her “into tune” with Himself and she praised and said, “Jesus is my Life. Jesus is above pain.” In a few minutes, “a flow of glory and life” would go through her body so that she was com­pletely relieved of all pain. Thus she was “kept above pain in a wonderful manner.” Once or twice she lapsed in the faith of this experience of reckoning Christ within as her very physical Life, with the result that she “discovered an utter illness and gripes of pain no one could bear well.” She could not stand up straight. At such a time she kept “cool,” however, and believed God that it could not go on, praising God, and saying, “Jesus is above pain.” The result was that Christ, who is Life, mani­fested Himself so that she was delivered of her pain and was given “supernatural life.” Thus she had “days and days of just walking in Jesus, of just knowing that He must be her strength.” She confessed that during this period she had taken more sleep than she had since she had been in the Homes. Even so she was “rarely in bed before midnight,” beginning the next day’s work by six or before and then worked “steadfastly as hard as she [could] right through the next day and evening.” Without the manifestation of the supernatural life of God she would have been in bed. With it she was not only kept alive but working way beyond the ability of an ordinarily well person. Right in the midst of her own mortal combat in the spring of 1921, one of her older associates, then almost sixty-five, felt so nervous and weak that he feared he was going to have a nervous breakdown and needed help. In spite of her desperate condition, she immediately undertook his case, going to the Lord for the necessary knowledge and wisdom to see him through. As a result, he was taught to grasp “his great possibilities in God of the health of Christ” and so was spared for many years of useful service in the vineyard. Most illuminating and instructive in relation to these years of faith” are the notes and Bible studies which Mrs. R. made in her wide-margin Testament.ⁿ Many of these are dated, so that it is readily seen that they were made during some of her sharpest conflicts. By these notes the veil is lifted a bit, so that one gets a little glimpse into her soul struggles and sees how she was sustained in the midst of her trials by the Word of God. Note: During 1921 Mrs. Robinson made chain-reference studies of the following subjects in her New Testament: Faith, Prayer, Believe, Trust, Unbelief, Name, Hope, Wisdom, Grace, To Know Him, Meekness, Joy, Healing, Will of God, Glory, Mind (including thoughts), Worship, Thy God Reigneth, Devils or demons, Word of God, Giving thanks, Grace. She also studied and prayed over the Beatitudes, Love, First Peter, and Colossians. These studies furnish abundant proof that throughout her life and for all her spiritual gifts she made the Word of God her daily food and thereby nourished her inner man. For example, in February, 1921, she was “specially moved” to make a study of First Peter in connection with the sub­ject of “rejoicing in suffering.” On May 15 (1921), she began a chain reference study on the topics of Faith, Prayer, Believe, Trust, Unbelief (includ­ing Doubt and Fear). To this were added the topics of Name and, on May 25, of Hope. These seven she joined together with brackets, probably indicating their interrelation and that together they really formed one study. Certainly this was vitally connected with these “years of faith” and reminds one of the fact that “faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Rom. 10:17). Pursuing these topical studies throughout her Testament one finds marginal notes which were very pertinent to her circumstances: “Give me faith that Thou art Master of this storm. Thou art in the boat. Unbelief says, ‘Carest Thou not?’ Unbelief says, ‘It’s such a big storm—and it is so great!’ When the wind blows high and boat rocks, O let me have stillness and faith.” (Note beside Matt. 8:23-26.) “Make me throw aside tumult. Whenever there is tumult, cause me to stand still [and] look at Thee. Give me faith to keep my eyes on Thee—and off my troubles.” (Note beside Matt. 14:28-32.) “Remove unbelief, fear, doubt, distrust . . .“ (Note beside Matt. 17:20.) “Give me faith to see my path and know Thy will.” (Note beside Mark 10:52.) “Double, quadruple, multiply my faith,” she prays in con­nection with the last verse of First Corinthians Thirteen. Then she adds, “Faith is God’s call all the time if in trouble and frazzle—not at time of victory—as I am now—without any change.” At the end of Second Timothy Mrs. R. records the climax of her prayer for faith up to that time, July 15, ‘21: “Give me faith to be a good taker and believe for all prayed thro’.... Faith for manifestation and greater fullness of God— all I know about this, the greatest I know—... Christ in you!....Keeping that which is gained. Maintaining faith in the midst of trial and keeping up continuously an attitude of faith. . . Then Mrs. R. makes the statement with which this chapter opens: “These are years of faith. How many times have I prayed in faith? How much have I today? I shall ask Thee that this day may be a climax to these past prayers and calls and whatever I have prayed thro’ lately, that I may know that now, today, I have the faith that it is my portion.. On the next day, July 16, the Lord spoke to His child this word which she records on the fly-leaf of this Testament: “What you want to see again is the abandonment that leaves things to God. What I want you to see is the power and might of God to take things over. If you are an aban­doned vessel, God reigns.” Whatever the immediate cause or circumstances of any of her trials were at this period, the real issue involved, the test which the Lord was giving her, was whether in the hottest of any battle she would stick to her original conse­cration and want nothing but “Just Jesus.” By every con­ceivable means, within and without, the Lord tried her on this point—whether in any matter at all she would exercise the slightest desire of her own or hold onto anything or anyone—blessings or experiences or people whom even God had given her—except Jesus. So the Lord allowed the fiery trials to continue and to increase. In the midst of these the Lord gave this word of admonition, January 10, 1922, to one of her fellow soldiers in the fight: “Don’t look on the dark side of faith things, but on the faith side of dark things.” A most timely admonition this was, for exactly two months later, like Epaphroditus, “because of the work of Christ” Mrs. Robinson was dealt the most fiendish stroke yet in­flicted by the adversary and became “sick, nigh unto death.” “I would like to be one of those who didn’t grumble when the fight is hard,” stated Mrs. R. in a sermon two months before her illness. “Sometimes the fight is so hard,” she continued, “that you get your eyes off the Captain, and sometimes the fight is so hard that you see nobody but the Captain. You do not dare to look at the enemy. That is victory. Look at Him. Victory is for the man that thought God was true and would fear no evil.” And so she did just that. At the beginning of these “years of faith,” the Lord Jesus Christ spoke a word to Mrs. R. (December 4, 1919): “No matter what she is in faith, she is never to let Me go from her as her best Beloved and most Desired.” And she never did. Through all the vicissitudes and perplexities and trials of these “years of faith” she “held Him and would not let Him go.” Thus united to Him Who is the Beginner and Perfecter of our faith, her faith was made perfect and triumphed over the work of the enemy. “There were no ‘good days’ and ‘bad days’ in this life,” wrote one who had the opportunity to observe Mrs. Robin­son through these years. “They were all good even though bad. She sometimes sang her own little, lilting tune with the words: ‘Oh, Jesus is the way! The way is very straight; The way is very narrow. And she loved this way more than her comfort because it meant fellowship with Christ her Lord.”