04 Implications for Marriage

Implications for Marriage of the Relationship Between Christ and the Church

Let’s begin this section with a question for all who are married: When was the first time you looked at your spouse and thought, "How in the world did I choose to marry this person?"

Most of us who have been married for more than a year have asked that question at some point. Oh, when we stand at the altar, although we know that most couples quarrel, and although we know that we have quarreled prior to marriage, many of us believe that ours will be the first marriage in the history of the world to be characterized exclusively by tenderness, respect, and love. It usually does not take us too many weeks to discover that this seemingly perfect spouse, amazingly, has not escaped the stain of sin. And we begin to wonder what we’re in for.

Before we begin to move from our discussion of Christ and the Church to talking about marriage, it is important to emphasize that we are describing an ideal. And every marriage represented in this class - including my own - falls short of that ideal. But the promise of God is that in Christ we are new creations, we are the temple of the Holy Spirit, we can be filled with the Spirit; Christ is in us, thereby providing us with the hope of glory. Whatever your failures, whatever your mistakes in marriage, you can begin today to live out the ideal Christian marriage by -- and only by -- depending on the power of the Holy Spirit within you. And when you fail, when you step out in your own power and make a mess, you need to seek forgiveness from God and your spouse, and begin again. Paul has already told us to walk in a manner worthy of our calling, to walk as children of light. Children don’t learn to walk over night. They learn by falling -- and picking themselves up and trying again. And we too must pick ourselves up after our failures, and thereby learn to walk in the area of marriage, learning to depend on the Holy Spirit in this most intimate, most difficult, and most rewarding area of our lives.

Recall God’s command to Joshua:

I hereby command you: Be strong and courageous; do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go. (Joshua 1:9) As we gain a deeper understanding of God’s ideal for marriage, many of us will see the stark contrast with our own marriages. Satan will try to use that contrast to make you think, "This is hopeless. I am a failure as a husband or wife. My marriage can never reflect this ideal." God commands us, "Do not be discouraged. Do not be afraid. I am with you. I will uphold you. Depend on me, and the years the locusts have devoured I will redeem, and use for my glory in your life." So let us focus on the ideal, and then by God’s power strive to attain it.

Recall that in our examination of the context of Ephesians, we have seen the relationship between Christ and the Church described in several ways. In the previous section, we highlighted four aspects of this relationship that become particularly clear in 5:22-33:

·The unity of Christ and the church ·The sacrificial love of Christ for the church ·The headship of Christ over the church, and the submission of the church to Him ·The perfecting of the church by Christ

Now we ask these questions: How does the image of the relationship between Christ and the church shed light on the relationship between husband and wife? If Christ and the church provide a pattern for the ideal Christian marriage, what are the lessons for marriage today?