A neighbor shot himself in the field behind my house on Tuesday. It is profoundly sad and tragic. I spent the the first few days of this week writing a poem about the many struggles that I had prior to becoming a Christian with this particular demon. This man was a good man. He was a Christian. I had spoken to him many times. The last time we spoke he gave me some tiny little crosses that he would hand out to people, he said that he knew I spoke to people and maybe I could give them one. I want you to know today that if you are struggling with this issue, please speak to someone, find someone. I also want to ask folks today to engage people more, even just ask how someone is doing. In a supposedly connected world we have become so disconnected. I pray the Lord's grace upon his wife and adult children. Here is the poem I was working on just the day before this poor soul took his life...............Darkened Troubled WatersI was born with a trembling soulIntuitively knowing that I'd have to pay the tollDarkened troubled waters and the wind was in my faceStaying alive was just one perpetual raceSwimming up the river, never ever downReally,would it be such a big deal just to drownJust to stop the thrashing and simply to let goAnd the darkened troubled waters would take me in its flowYou would see me laugh but you would never see me cryThe trouble with troubled waters is that they dare you to dieHopes and expectations were for ordinary peopleIn my darkened troubled waters, hope was truly lethalPretending to be normal was the greatest pain of allIt looked like I was walking but it really was a crawlThe darkened troubled waters they were seeping into meThis was the kind of darkness that no one must ever seeIt was the bottom of a bottle, sex and then a roachIn no particular order, this was my approachAnd all the while the waters rise trying to pull you downAny light was left receding as the darkness gathered roundDarkened troubled waters and a trembling soulThe man in dark was coming, he was coming for his tollI looked around and found myself at the bottom of the pitI looked up and saw no light and knew that this was itI looked down in horror, no heart no flesh no boneI looked around in horror, my God I'm all aloneAnd in that moment I cried "my God please come to me"And suddenly there was light "I have come to set you free."And so it was and so it is my Father took me by the handUpward ever upward out of the pit into the promised landHe set me on the Rock and I looked down, no longer a heart of steelWithin my chest a new heart beat and it could love and it could feelIf you swim in troubled waters and there's no where left to goThere's no more fight, you've given up and are carried by its flowThere is a hand that reaches down and He will make you wholeFor the hand belongs to the Son of God, He's already paid the toll.