Danger of Wanting Everyone to Love You

This message is one of the Times Square Pulpit series. It was recorded in the sanctuary of Times Square Church in Manhattan, New York City. Other tapes are available by writing to World Challenge P.O. Box 260, Lindale, Texas 75771 or calling 214-963-8626.

None of these messages are copyrighted and you are welcome to make copies for free distribution to your friends. 2 Samuel chapter 4 2 Samuel chapter 4 As I talked to you this morning about the danger of wanting everybody to love you I've had several people say I've been working all of my life to try to get people to love me and now you tell me there's a danger in it. Well, turn to 2 Samuel chapter 4 and we're going to stay in 2 Samuel most of the time and I'm going to get to that in just a moment.

So just leave your Bibles open there and I'll share with you what we want to talk about from this 4th chapter. But first of all, by way of introduction and by way of personal testimony I want to say that, and some of you know this I've shared, Pastor David has shared from time to time regarding our own background and upbringing the fact that we grew up in a wonderful Christian home a minister's home, father was a pastor and I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that I was loved. And I was the youngest of five and I think I explained one time that my mother and dad only wanted to have four children but mother got sick, she would have fainting spells and went to the doctor and tried to find out what it is and finally the doctor said, well you know if you have another child it might take care of this and as I understand back some years ago that getting pregnant was supposed to be a solution to a lot of physical problems I don't know anything about that but anyway the doctor said, you know, have another child and so mother did and I came along and solved my mother's physical problems and I can't tell you how delighted I was to find that out years later and every time, if my mother would give me a hard time on anything I'd say, mom if it wasn't for me, you know, you'd be sick now so treat me good and because I was the last child I was, as I said, greatly loved, felt loved not only at home but at church and when mom and dad would go away I was loved and spoiled either by Sister Greenaway where I was taken out on a farm and loved it and spent time there or I went out in another area, country with Sister Smith and between mom and dad and Sister Greenaway and Sister Smith and all the church people I just felt greatly loved and I thought everybody loved me and I thought I was terrific until the second grade because in the second grade I started to wear glasses ugly, horned, rimmed glasses that was before they became stylish or became the in thing I guess for hippies or yuppies or whatever but I remember the next day after being issued the glasses I went to school and I sat across the aisle from the prettiest girl in the second grade and I sat down and she looked over at me and she looked at me for a long time and finally she said to me boy, do you look ugly I sank down into my desk chair in fact I wish the floor could have opened up and I could have disappeared the cute little preacher's boy was now the ugly duckling so he fought now my parents didn't change towards me I was loved as much as I ever was but other people seemed to change towards me at least some of them and I didn't feel so cute I didn't feel so lovely or loved by everybody anymore but I managed to overcome that minor handicap and I grew up in a stable, secure, loving environment when I entered the ministry I had a very acceptable entrance preaching, beginning to preach like David at the age of 16 my dad's philosophy was let no man despise your youth and so I believed that and I went for it and began to preach and people seemed to like my preaching or at least tolerated it perhaps because I was so young and I enjoyed preaching not only because of what it did for people but what it did for me I felt accepted, I felt fulfilled, I felt needed, I felt loved I went on to Bible college, graduated and then I went to take my first church and I had a great, another fine reception I went and preached and it was a situation where you preach and then the people vote on whether they want you as a pastor or not well I got 100% of the votes all seven people wanted me all seven members wanted me to be their pastor well I stayed there one year and the church maybe grew to 30 or 40 people and I found out that in that community, in that church that I wasn't loved all of the time and I experienced rejection and I've learned since then that not everybody loves you all of the time and as a result of this discovery and it took me years to discover that sometimes I did certain things or have to do certain things or I would purposely do certain things in order that people would love me or accept me in other words, that from time to time I found myself trying to be a people pleaser now don't get me wrong there would be something tragically wrong with you if you did not want to be loved now there are some people for whatever reasons don't feel good about themselves and they don't think that anybody else likes them and they even do things to purposely alienate others this is a person who does not have a good self-centered image or excuse me, a God-centered image of themselves and they feel hatred for others as well as for themselves you see, Satan loves to destroy God's creation and to get people to see themselves as useless individuals and sometimes this comes because of various circumstances in people's lives but I'm not talking about people who don't want to be loved but I am talking about something else there is a danger of wanting so much to be loved and so much to be accepted that it becomes the driving force of your life and I want to look at one Bible character who started out in life deprived of love at a certain age and I want you to see what it did in him and what it did for him and then how and where he found a pure love that became the center of his life and I'm referring to the grandson of King Saul the son of Jonathan and the foster child of a man by the name of Meshach I am talking about a man by the name of Mephibosheth and you'll pardon me if occasionally because that's a long name Mephibosheth, I may refer him to little Mo every once in a while but I want you to follow the story with me as we look at the danger of wanting everybody to love you first of all there was a triple tragedy that took place during Mephibosheth's childhood he had the unfortunate lot to have been born at a time when his grandfather King Saul was losing his kingdom God was taking his kingdom away from him because he was a bloodthirsty man and God rose up in his place David but Saul of course and his men created or caused, there was a civil war that was going on between the remains of Saul and his kingdom and David's new emerging kingdom God's anointed choice now word came one day to Saul's house or his palace or his headquarters that King David's army was prevailing in battle and that Saul and Jonathan had been killed and the residents of Saul's household immediately had to flee for their lives it is then that this triple tragedy took place in the life of the character of my message Mephibosheth you can see it turn with me or look with me to 2 Samuel chapter 4 and verse 4 2 Samuel chapter 4 and verse 4 it says and Jonathan Saul's son had a son that was lame of his feet he was five years old when the tidings came of Saul and Jonathan out of Jezreel that was the battlefield and the tidings came of course that they had been killed and the nurse took him up and fled and it came to pass as she made haste to flee that he fell and became lame and his name was Mephibosheth now that's all we read about little Moe at that time but that one verse and one incident speaks volumes now consider the triple blow in his life in one day or in one short period a king's kid, he was a king's kid a five year old boy, the grandson of a king probably very very special to his father and to his grandfather who had servants who waited upon him had soldiers to protect him had the privilege of romping through the king's headquarters or palace whatever it was but in one day or in one week's time Mephibosheth loses his father his grandfather the king and the use of his two feet or two legs now the scripture simply says he fell and became lame but that describes only the physical effects of his injury think what it must have been like for him emotionally and spiritually and psychologically to have so suddenly have things turn in his life suddenly he goes from being the special little boy and suddenly loses that which is precious to him let alone his two feet and that no doubt left deep scars inside him there is also no mention of where his mother or grandmother was here now the reason that I am so moved by this story and why Mephibosheth seems to leap out of the pages of the bible and grab me is because I have met so many Mephibosheth who have grown up in life and have had the similar experience happen to them I am referring to those who carry the outward and inward scars of a wounded past or a childhood or some traumatic experience in their life I told you briefly about little Donnie myself at the age of seven thinking that I was handicapped because I had to wear ugly horn rimmed glasses but I want to tell you that was nothing I may have been inhibited by that but I was not scarred for life I was not crippled emotionally thank God or spiritually but many a person sits in the Times Square church whether this morning or at other times sits here having had an experience that may not exactly parallel Mephibosheth but the outcome was the same you may have been dropped physically or excuse me you may have not been dropped physically but you may have been dropped emotionally and spiritually in your life it's happened in a multitude of cases that a parent just like Mephibosheth's nurse in a hurry to flee many a parent in an effort to flee from their own past have not been able to care for their own children and in a sense have dropped that child or has let that child go or has not been able to care for that child and you may have been that child I think of a young man who told me the story of his own life how suddenly he was left fatherless after a divorce and it was interesting how he described it to me he said when I was a kid we used to have a place in our yard where the yard would come down and then there would be a wall about 3 feet high and my father used to play this little game with me I would walk across the yard and run and my father would say come and I would jump off of that fence or off of that wall and I would jump into his arms and he said I just used to love to do that and in fact he said the older I got it finally came to a place where I couldn't do it anymore if I had jumped I'd have crushed my father because I got too big for that but he said when the divorce happened the separation in our family happened he said I felt as if I was still that little child and I had run to that fence and that my father had been there and in the middle of my jump suddenly he was gone suddenly he was gone in other words he was saying like Mephibosheth he fell and became lame in the case of Mephibosheth for the next dozen years or so he lived under foster care in a place called Lodibar turn with me to 2 Samuel the 9th chapter and verse 4 as we go quickly and take little nuggets or little glimpses of the story of his life though there's not much given to us there is enough to be able to paint a picture here in the 9th chapter in the 4th verse it says and the king said unto him where is he? speaking of Mephibosheth and Ziba said unto the king behold he is in the house of Mashar the son of Amiel in Lodibar now we do not know exactly what kind of life Mephibosheth had in Lodibar the pages of the Old Testament are silent about those years but we know that he went there when he was 5 years of age and when he appears again back in the pages of the Bible he is probably a young man in his early 20's and we don't know what happened in those years but there are some indications of what life may have been like in the house of Mashar do you know what the name Mashar means? it's interesting it means salesman salesman it's taken from a word that means salesman and that evidently was Mashar's occupation now it's not hard to deduct from his foster father's name that Mashar was not at home much a salesman has to travel a lot and we can draw from this that the cycle of neglect continued in the household of Mashar even though Mashar as a salesman was well off and Mephibosheth may have had a roof over his head but still there was no father figure there no male role model to identify with the village or town that Mephibosheth lived in adds further light into his situation do you know what Lodibar means? it means nothing I don't mean it doesn't mean anything it means quote unquote nothing in other words Lodibar must have been a wide spot in the road you know if they had cars you'd drive through and blink you wouldn't see it in other words a desolate lonely out of the way place a very stark contrast to life in a king's palace or residence again can you imagine being an orphan living with a family whose father is a traveling salesman in a village called nothing and being a fatherless child perhaps a motherless we don't know but also having crippled feet and Lodibar must have been exactly how Mephibosheth felt maybe he said I am a nobody I'm living in nothing and with nothing for a future and nobody to love me and had he known the Psalms perhaps Psalms 25-16 he might have quoted this listen it says turn to me and be gracious to me for I am lonely and afflicted or Psalms 143 and 4 says therefore my spirit is overwhelmed within me my heart is appalled within me my heart is appalled within me that describes a person who feels that he's been dealt an unjust undeserving blow in life somebody appalled by what has happened to him and I'm sure that must have been again it's not I don't think I'm taking any license here I'm not spreading the truth too far to get a picture of what Mephibosheth must have felt like oh but there's something else I want you to see here is that God remembered Mephibosheth he always remembers the lame and the fatherless and the lonely Job 29 14-16 listen to it it says my justice was like a robe and a turban I was eyes to the blind and feet to the lame I was a father to the needy and I investigated the cause which I did not know now Job could very well have been referring to David King David look at chapter 9 and verse 1 after David was reestablished in the throne and after a number of years went by suddenly God put it in David's heart to ask this question in verse 9 and David said is there yet any that is left of the house of Saul that I may show him kindness for Jonathan's sake and I want you to see this morning how remarkably that is a picture of Christ David here is a type of Christ a type of one who starts an investigation into a case in order to show kindness David said is there any left of the house of Saul remember I said Saul's house was a bloody house and because of that bloodthirstiness God had to empty that house judgment came upon it and fell upon Saul's household it was almost entirely wiped out except for one lonely crippled little boy little Moe young man by the name of Mephibosheth and God through David sought him out and found him hallelujah and I want to tell you this morning you may have been born into a bloodthirsty home you may have been born into an alcoholthirsty home you may have been born into a violentthirsty home you may have been born into a lustthirsty home or some other kind of infamous household but no matter how wicked your family heritage no matter what kind of household you came out of Christ is always asking the question is there anybody left? is there anybody there that I can show my kindness to? is there anybody there that has a hope and heart for me? I will come in and I will lift the Mephibosheth out of the household of Saul and I will bring him to my table hallelujah I've seen King Jesus do what King David did over and over again and that's to send out a call to investigate into a family or household to see if there is a lame Mephibosheth to whom he may show his kindness and go and find that crippled soul or that crippled life living in a place called nothing and to lift that Mephibosheth into a place of salvation and into wholeness didn't the Lord find some of you in Lodibar? you were into nothing? you were living nothing? there was nothing? there was nothing but emptiness? you felt like a forgotten crippled but God found you in Lodibar hallelujah and rescued you listen to what it says in Micah the fourth chapter verse six you don't need to turn to a beautiful prophetic picture it says in that day declares the Lord speaking of the day of Christ's first coming as well as his next coming he said in that day I will assemble the lame and gather the outcast even those whom I have afflicted and I will make the lame a remnant now I don't know about you but to me that describes times square church I will make the lame a remnant and the outcast a strong nation hallelujah and that's what God did that's what God did but you know there's another thing you must be saying well what are you preaching about the danger of everybody wanting to love you get to the point okay there's something else important that you need to know about Mephibosheth David found him they sent out a search they investigated the case and they found him living there in Lodibar brought him back to Jerusalem brought him back and said everything is restored everything is restored to you he now was able to sit at the king's table now David did that he brought him into his house but he still carried the wounds of the past and he helped Mephibosheth change his residence but he had not had a change of heart look with me at 2 Samuel the 9th chapter again well in fact let's begin to read from verse 1 and David said is there any yet that is left of the house of Saul that I may show him kindness for Jonathan's sake and there was of the house of Saul a servant whose name was Ziba and when they called him unto David the king said unto him art thou Ziba and he said thy servant is he and the king said is there not yet any of the house of Saul that I may show the kindness of God unto him and Ziba said unto the king Jonathan hath yet a son which is lame on his feet and the king said unto him where is he and Ziba said to the king behold he is in the house of Mishar the son of Amil in Lodibar then the king sent and fetched him I like that he fetched him where were you when God fetched you and got you he fetched him and out of the house of Mishar verse 6 now when Mephibosheth the son of Jonathan the son of Saul was coming to David he fell on his face and did reverence and David said Mephibosheth and he answered behold thy servant and David said unto him fear not for I will surely show thee kindness for Jonathan thy father's sake and will restore thee all the land of Saul thy father and thou shall eat bread at my table continually and he bowed himself Mephibosheth bowed himself and he said now listen to this what is thy servant that thou shouldest look upon such a dead dog a dead dog as I am now you tell me this is that not the voice of self pity and self hatred and even bitterness you see Mephibosheth is not able to see himself as anything other than a poor neglected forgotten nothing what bitterness I sense in those words what is your servant that you should regard a dead dog like me why are you doing this I'm no good I'm just like a dead dog listen God can bring you from Lodibar the Lord can bring you out of Lodibar and out from nothing but will you also allow him to deliver you from the traumas or the self pity or the bitterness of your past and the attitude that you're always being treated like a dead dog you know the sight of a dead dog if you're a dog lover the sight of a dead dog beside the road all it does is conjure up feelings of pity and that's how Mephibosheth felt about himself and that's what he sought from David as no doubt he had been doing for years down in Lodibar seething in sorrow seething in self pity seething in bitterness and let me tell you something if you have a dead dog mentality you need to bury it or you'll never be able to eat at David's table you'll never be able to see what God has in store for you if you still have a dead dog mentality now how it was that we know Mephibosheth was living with David but still spiritually and emotionally he was crippled is that when a time of testing came he acted like the cripple what happened is that David's son Absalom led a revolt to take the kingdom from his father and David had to flee into exile Mephibosheth does not go with David and he used his lameness as a lame excuse for not going turn to chapter 16 chapter 16 verses 1 to 4 is talking about David when Absalom has led this revolt and has got behind him some of the leaders in the kingdom and the word comes to David that there are more that are against him that are for him and so he has to flee verse 16 and when David was a little past the top of the hill behold Ziba the servant of Mephibosheth met him with a couple of asses saddled and upon them two hundred loaves of bread and a hundred bunches of raisins and a hundred of summer fruits and a bottle of wine and the king said to Ziba what mean is this and he said well it's to take care of you and verse 3 and the king said but where is thy master's son meaning Mephibosheth and Ziba said unto the king behold he abideth in Jerusalem for he said today shall the kingdom of Israel restore me the kingdom shall the house of Israel restore to me the kingdom of my father you see the reason that Mephibosheth stayed behind remember now he's probably a late teenager or in his early twenties the reason that he stayed behind is that he was going the way the wind was blowing and the way the wind was blowing it looked like Absalom was going to take over in fact 2nd Kings 15 12 says and the conspiracy was strong in other words the conspiracy against David was strong and the people increased continually with Absalom and so Mephibosheth seeing that Absalom may be the next king decides not to go with David into the wilderness he said I've had enough of being out in Lodibar I've had enough being into nothing I'm going to stay behind because maybe maybe the people will turn against Absalom and then I'm the heir to the throne I'm the grandson of Saul maybe they'll choose me but more importantly I believe that he fell under the spell of Absalom you see there is a characteristic of the Mephibosheth of this world is that they go wherever they can be loved and they can be accepted Mephibosheth wanted a place of acceptance at any cost he could have gone with David into the wilderness and into exile and into hiding and into hardship but instead he says no no and he stays behind because I believe he wanted to be loved more than he wanted to do what was right and pleasing in God's sight and he chose self interest over God's interest now listen to me very carefully because I'm getting to the heart of my message the danger of always wanting to be loved is that you will go down any road that seems to promise a little love a little attention a little affection Absalom stole the hearts of the people right out from underneath David and Mephibosheth fell under the same spirit of Absalom it's a spirit that feeds on applause and the Mephibosheth in the church run to wherever and whoever will feed their ego or feed their pocketbook or help them climb the ladder of success or always pat them on the back and always tell them what they want to hear whether it's from the Lord or not in 2 Samuel don't turn there 15 verse 5 and 6 it tells us how Absalom seduced the people listen and it happened that when a man came near to prostrate himself before him he would put out his hand and take hold of him and kiss it and in this manner Absalom dealt with all Israel who came to the king for judgment so Absalom stole away the hearts of the men of Israel and I believe that Mephibosheth very well may have come under that Absalom spell his hand was kissed and he allowed his heart to be stolen because he saw in Absalom some love and acceptance that maybe he wouldn't see if he stayed with David and you see there is something in the hearts of many of God's people that causes them to put out a hand to Absalom and let him take their hand and kiss it and their hearts are stolen in the process because they always want to be hand kissed for example some people have been wounded because a pastor or leader turned out to be an Absalom they followed him because everybody else was following him they followed him because he seemed to be going the crowd seemed to be going with him everything seemed to be happening with him and for him and like Mephibosheth they followed after Absalom but eventually they witnessed his downfall but listen to me no Absalom can rise to power unless people let him take their hand and kiss it let me say that again no Absalom can rise to power unless people let him take their hand and kiss it because there may be something in you that always wants to be loved and accepted and you may have fallen under the spell of an Absalom because there is something in your heart that is drawn to hand kisses you may like to cozy up to flesh or people of charm or rising stars or because you're trying to satisfy a fleshly need in your life now don't get me wrong we as pastors I can honestly say and I don't want to say it too much lest you think we're trying to convince you of something that's not true but I can honestly say that we have that God has put a love in our hearts for this congregation as far as I'm concerned heaven is in New York and heaven is in Times Square Church but I want to tell you if you're looking for hand kisses you know you've come to the wrong place you've come to the wrong place I've seen young girls, young women who've experienced the wounds of rejection such as Mephibosheth and I've seen them go from one male relationship to another either immorally or otherwise wanting desperately to be loved by anybody or everybody or there may be somebody in this church family or somebody in your own immediate family whom you feel does not like you or love you and try as you may you just cannot seem to do right or be accepted by that person listen, beware you can become a man pleaser rather than a God pleaser because you want to be so much loved and accepted that you compromise your testimony I have seen it from the pulpit to the pew I know a minister right now wants so much to be more than he is that he lies tells lies and he's had a whole staff that confronted him with and he fired them all but he's still in this church but he fabricates, tells lies because he wants so much to be a big man, a big pastor accepted by everybody he lies and from the pulpit to the pew you can do things that compromise your testimony because you want everybody to love you turn with me to Ephesians chapter 6 there are some instructions here unusual instructions that apply to a church even though Paul is giving them to servants or to slaves in the 6th chapter of Ephesians in one translation it may use the word slaves another servants and I believe it applies the principle applies to all of us since we're called to be servants of the Lord and servants of others and what Paul said to these slaves or servants applies to us he says in this is Ephesians 6 verse 5 says be obedient to those who are your ministers according to the flesh with fear and trembling in the sincerity of your heart as to Christ not by way of eye service as man pleasers but as servants of Christ doing the will of God from the heart with good will render service as to the Lord and not to men and the reason Paul wrote this is that some servants would do whatever external service necessary to please men as long as a servant was looking they'd run around and look like they're doing a good job you know it's like every once in a while I walk around here there's a few people that tease me and they say oh here comes Pastor Don we better quit talking about what we're talking right now they're only kidding but the servants would try to please and you know something you can get caught up in a cycle of people pleasing of man pleasing of relative pleasing of boss pleasing of big people pleasing in other words you know big people come along you want to please the big people and in the process displease the Lord and you know inevitably you'll get caught inevitably you'll get yourself in a situation where you're caught between having to please two significant people or two important people in your life at the same time and if you please one you'll alienate the other and that kind of people pleasing can drive you crazy you know I've discovered something in my own life if I quit trying to please everyone and want everyone to love me and instead concentrate on doing the will of God from the heart with good will render service as to the Lord and not to men that that is all that God requires of me you see the danger of wanting everybody to love you is the danger of trying in the flesh and in yourself to be loved and accepted by people when our first obligation is to be loved and accepted by the Lord and the Bible says when a man's ways please the Lord he will eventually even make his enemies be at peace with him hallelujah I have seen people even Christians wear themselves out going to every length to do this or to do that for other people but the motive was wrong listen there is a selfless kind of sacrifice there is a proper kind of giving and laying down of your life but there also is another kind that's meant to enhance yourself or for you to get something in return and that is a motive that's wrong look what Ephesians says again it says doing the will of God from the heart with good will render service as to the Lord and not to men knowing that whatever good things each one does that he will receive back from the Lord and there's the key if you do things unto the Lord you will receive back from the Lord that's the reward if you do things as men pleasing or to be loved or accepted by others then you're wanting to receive back from them and the reason that some people disappoint you the reason that some pastors disappoint you is that you put people up on a pedestal and you place expectations upon them that they possibly never can fulfill in all of your life get your eyes on Jesus my friend unto the Lord unto the Lord Psalms 87 7 is one of my favorite verses it says those then those who sing as well as those who play the flutes will say all my springs of joy are in you hallelujah all my springs of joy are in you nobody no human being no one can satisfy you except Jesus but you know there's one there's one more beautiful picture of Mephibosheth that I want to leave with you it's not the last scriptural account of his life but it is the most significant one go to the ninth chapter ninth chapter verse 11 after King David purposely sought out and found little Moe in Lodibar he brings him back to Jerusalem he says I'm going to restore to you that which belonged to Saul his kingdom his real estate and what David said to him and what he did to him and what he did for this crippled grandson of Saul and son of Jonathan I think is beautiful almost beyond description 2 Samuel 9 11 it says as for Mephibosheth said the king he shall eat at my table as one of the king's sons verse 13 so Mephibosheth dwelt in Jerusalem he did eat continually he did eat continually at the king's table and was lame on both his feet listen you and I have a place to eat continually at the king's table there is never a need to go anywhere else to eat or to find love in one day Mephibosheth went from Lodibar to Jerusalem he went from loneliness to loveliness he went from desolation right into the king's palace and he sat down at the table and David says you always always have a place at my table you never have to go anywhere else Jeremiah said it Jeremiah 31 and 3 says the Lord hath appeared unto me of old saying yea I have loved thee with an everlasting love therefore with loving kindness I have drawn thee and that's what David did for Mephibosheth and you see when you're sitting at the king's table and you're being loved by the king it does not mean that you sit alone you sit beside other brothers and sisters in the Lord and we do feel their love and we do need each other's love but whose love is it my friend that love flows from the head which is Christ and whatever we have to offer each other is only the love of Jesus Christ coming from his headship through our lives as we sit at his table and then we share that love one with another Isaiah 43 verse says since thou was precious in my sight thou hast been honorable and I have loved thee therefore will I give men for thee and people for thy life yes he will, he will give you people but it will be only when you're eating at the king's table there's one last thing as Mephibosheth sat at the king's table his feet were under the table he did eat continually at the king's table and then for some reason again the writer adds these words he did eat continually at the king's table and was lame in both feet you see when you eat at the Lord's table your wounds and your hurts and your lameness is covered nobody notices our lameness when we sit at the king's table our feet are under the table do you see that picture the Lord puts our feet under the table he covers our wounds and when you came to eat at the king's table you didn't know Mephibosheth had lame feet you see you don't need to allow your hurts or your wounds to be a reason to feel rejected or to rush up to people and say look at me, love me because as long as you're at the king's table your feet are under the table, hallelujah I want to open my heart to you in closing and just share with you just a little personal testimony a friend of mine asked me about ministering here we were talking about ministering here in Times Square Church and being a part of pastoral staff and in the process of our conversation one of my closest friends he asked me who are your favorite preachers I said Billy Graham and David Wilkerson and he said oh that's a nice compliment to your brother and he said who's your favorite teacher I said Bob Phillips he said you know I envy you I envy you being a pastor and being able to minister with two men of God that you respect and I said don't envy me, pray for me and I opened my heart a little bit to him as I'll just give you a little glimpse I said do you know what it's like to have to get up every Tuesday night after you follow Bob Phillips Sunday morning and David Wilkerson Sunday night and you know I have to say this very rarely do I say to David you preach the good message or Bob once in a while I do because I know when I do the devil comes right behind me and whispers to me and says yeah man they preached a terrific message how in the world can you ever get up and follow that and you know and so I'm talking to you about insecurities but you know what the Lord said the Lord showed me what I was doing you know what I was doing I was taking my feet out from underneath the table and I was looking at my feet and say I got lame feet how can I ever stand up to preach against other men of God I've got lame feet I've got a lame brain I've got a lame message and the Lord said to me put your feet back under the table because they'll never know hallelujah and you'd never known that if I hadn't shared that with you because most of the time I've learned to keep my feet under the table because as long as my feet are under the table I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me hallelujah and as long as you take your seat at the king's table he'll feed you he'll satisfy you he'll meet your needs he'll cover your lameness your insecurities your feeling of rejection and some of you have been like Mephibosheth in your life you've had some traumatic experience you have experienced rejection and like Mephibosheth there was a time in your life when you felt that you were dropped you were let go you were abandoned and every time you take your feet out from underneath the table the devil or yourself you remind yourself of that and you see that and you begin to feel self pity you begin to feel other feelings but I want to tell you just as king David provided for Mephibosheth he has provided for you and he said you can sit at my table continually hallelujah and put your feet under my table because I cover your wounds hallelujah 2 Kings and I close with this 2 Kings 25 29 and 30 so Jehoiachin put aside his prison clothes and for the rest of his life ate continually at the king's table day by day the king gave Jehoiachin a regular allowance a portion for each day all the days of his life hallelujah hallelujah I don't know about you but I eat at the king's table praise the lord my feet are under the table hallelujah all my sins are under the blood all my sins are under the table hallelujah and as long as I know that as long as I know that I don't have to feed on your love I want to be loved I want to be accepted I don't have to feed on that because I feed at the table that the lord has spread for me hallelujah I taste and see that the lord is good hallelujah let's stand together praise the lord there's a stirring in your heart there's a movement in your physical body it's the holy spirit saying respond open your heart you feel a moving of the holy spirit on your heart is there a tug or pull at your heart that's the holy spirit saying open your eyes look at the word now search your heart if you have that need as they sing it one more time up in the balcony in here respond