In this sermon, the speaker shares his personal testimony of experiencing a revival in his prayer life. He describes feeling broken and grieving, but after confessing a sin, he experiences a breakthrough. The speaker emphasizes the importance of being in vital union with God and shares his journey of finding a Bible-believing church. He also highlights the need for honesty and transparency in our relationship with God, acknowledging that many people have secrets and sins that would shock others if revealed.

Now, Heavenly Father, tonight we're so thankful we could meet here in your Son's name. And Father, in the power of that name, we implore and we plead that you would come among your people. God, that you would open our eyes that we might behold wondrous things out of your word. Father, I pray that great grace would be upon us. That great grace would be upon them all, like it says in the book of Acts. And Father, that there might be great help, great encouragement, great conviction, great cleansing, great victory, great empowerment as a consequence of this meeting tonight. Have your way, Lord. We give you permission to speak to our hearts and we thank you in advance for what you're going to say. In Jesus' name, amen. You may be seated. Are you enjoying God or enduring God? How many of you are enjoying your Bible study? How many of you are enduring your Bible study? Are you enjoying your prayer life or enduring your prayer life? You know, not every Christian has been happy all the day ever since he's seen the light. It makes a great chorus. Too bad it doesn't pan out and experience that way every time. Years ago, I got a mailing from the leaders in North America concerning the National Day of Prayer. I read it with great interest. I'd never heard of it at that point in time and come to find out that the leaders were calling all Christians in America to join in on a great National Day of Prayer. And on this great, monumentous National Day of Prayer, they were inviting all believers to spend at least five minutes in prayer on the National Day of Prayer. Now, when I read that, I didn't know whether I ought to laugh or weep. But I thought to myself, man alive, if five minutes constitutes the National Day of Prayer, then there's a lot of people that name the name of Jesus that are simply not enjoying fellowship with God. And my brother and sister, when we stop enjoying God, we become candidates for revival. Over 550 references in the Bible to joy and rejoicing. And revival deals with those things that keep us from enjoying God through the Holy Spirit. I believe that the God of the Bible is a supremely happy God, for in His presence there is fullness of joy. But brethren, what good is it to dwell in Jerusalem if we never see the face of the King? One man said that God is most glorified in us when we're most satisfied in Him. Duncan Campbell said that revival is an awareness of the presence of God. That revival is simply an awareness of the presence of God, a consciousness of the personal presence of God. P.T. Forsythe said we do not pray in order to live the Christian life. We do not pray in order to live the Christian life, but rather we live the Christian life in order to pray. I want to tell you there's nothing more defining and more important about you than your relationship with God in prayer. S.D. Gordon said there's more you can do after you pray, but until you do pray there's nothing more you can do but pray. I believe the church in North America is dying on its feet because it's not living on its knees. You know they've been trying to get prayer back in public school now for about three decades. I'd kind of like to see prayer come back into the Baptist church, wouldn't you? Don't you think it's a stretch to try to get people who don't even believe to observe a moment of silence or something like that, when the fact of the matter is we need a revival of prayer in the house of God. Leonard Ravenhill said you can tell how popular a church is by the Sunday morning attendance. Tell how popular the church is by the Sunday morning attendance. He said you can tell how popular the guest preacher is by the Sunday evening attendance. Then he said you can tell how popular God is by the prayer meeting attendance. You ever stop to think that maybe the most unpopular person in the church today is God himself? Andrew Murray said is it not a proof that the Holy Spirit is to a great extent a stranger in the church when prayer is regarded as a burden or a duty or a task. All my brethren, Wesley said God will do nothing but an answer to prayer, but everything by it. Jesus said my father's house shall be called a house of a house of prayer. Jesus central definition of the church, a house of prayer. Jesus central desire for the church, a house of prayer. You know you all have a very lovely auditorium here, but I just have to say this, as lovely as it is there's nothing sacred about this sanctuary per se. It's not like God's just hanging around here all the time. God does not live in buildings or ornate edifices. God lives in people. Man is the dwelling place of God. We've been made a habitation of God by his spirit and if God lives in me and if God lives in you then my father's house, my father's house, a house of prayer. No man is any greater than his prayer life. No man is any greater than his prayer life. No woman is any greater than a prayer life. And no church will ever be any greater than his corporate prayer life. Study the book of Acts. You'll find at least 53 references to prayer over just about two references per chapter in the book of Acts. The only way to explain what God did in the early church was prayer and the Holy Spirit of God. I heard about a lady one time that had a couple of children that were giving her fits. They were very mischievous all the time getting in trouble and she did everything to try to straighten them out. She threatened them, disciplined them, yelled at them, spanked them, talked to them, bribed them and the more she did the worse they got. And she was about at the end of her rope and she was talking to her neighbor confiding in her and began to tell her about her children and what a nightmare it was and the neighbor woman broke in and said oh well sister I had the same trouble with my children. She said I I tried everything to get them straightened out but nothing worked until I finally took them down and and let my pastor talk to them and she said why since pastors talk to them I've had hardly any trouble at all. Well this woman was desperate so she got the pastor's phone number and called and made an appointment. Maybe he could work a miracle on her two brats. So she goes in with her two children and here they are in fear and trembling and they're guilty of sin and they're meeting with an authority figure and on top of that he represented God which made it all the more intimidating and here they go in and the pastor introduces himself and says to the mother why don't you just wait out and outside in the in the waiting room I want to speak to you boys here in private. So she goes out and closes the door and pastor sits down and the boys are sitting there in fear and trembling across the desk from the pastor and the pastor said to the boys he said I want to ask you a question I want you to tell me where is God? And they just sit there in stone silence and the pastor spoke up the second time he said son I asked you a question now I want you to tell me right now where is God? The kids just sat there the little one was crying the old one felt like joining in and they didn't know what to say and the pastor got very abrupt no doubt a fundamental baptist pastor and he said the third time he said son I've asked you twice now I'm going to ask you one more time I want you to tell me right now where is God? And by that time the kid jumped up out of his seat ran out of the waiting room and he screamed out and he said mom mom they've lost God around here and now they're trying to blame that one on us too. Now there's no doubt about it these boys had done a lot of things they ought not to have done but if they had lost God down to church then they were on their own on that one but you know I believe that that is the predicament precisely the predicament of a lot of the people that name the name of that they have lost the personal presence of God you say Harold don't didn't you learn anything in Bible school don't you know that God is everywhere God is omnipresent friend let me just tell you something God is not everywhere like he was with the glory of God fill the temple and the tabernacle and the people could not even stand upright because of the overwhelming personal presence of God God is not everywhere like he was on the day of Pentecost when three thousand three thousand crowded into the kingdom of God and friend when we lose this sense of the nearness of God when we lose the sense of the smile of God when we lose this this this manifest presence of God I say we become candidates for revival I was sitting in Bible college I think that we had the most unusual speakers come to our chapel platform it should go in the Guinness Book of World Records most unusual chapel speakers and I'll never forget one one character one day he made a statement that absolutely grabbed my attention when he said it's the most natural thing in the world for a Christian to pray what do you think about that he said it's the most natural thing in the world for a Christian to pray I thought man if he's right about this if it's natural for a Christian to pray then I must not be a Christian because frankly prayer was just about anything but natural to me I've learned since then that if you're filled with the spirit of God it's natural to pray if you're walking in the flesh it's absolutely abnormal to pray and I want you to turn in your Bible to Revelation chapter 3 to what Alexander White described as the most important verse in the whole Bible on the subject of prayer Revelation chapter 3 and verse 20 we find Christ outside the door at the church of Laodicea and not even got a century out and here we find the Lord outside the door at the church at Laodicea Revelation chapter 3 in verse 20 the Lord Jesus Christ is speaking read out loud with me tonight if you would just verse 20 I'm reading from the King James Version Revelation chapter 3 verse 20 let's read aloud together please behold I stand at the door and knock if any man hear my voice and open the door I will come in to him and will sup with him and he with me now notice what he said he said I stand at the door it's interesting he always takes the initiative and he says I stand at the door and knock and then he said if any man hear my voice in John 10 he said all my sheep hear my voice all my sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow me do you ever hear his voice does he ever speak to you all my sheep hear my voice I know them and they follow me he said if any man hear my voice and open the door now Jesus doesn't come barging in uninvited and I want to tell you the Holy Spirit of God can be easily offended you know what really the essence of revival is the essence of revival is the time between sin and repentance grows to where it's just about one and the same to where we become very sensitive to this gentle dove of the Spirit of God and Jesus said if any man hear my voice and open the door he said I will come into him I want to tell you when you open the door you don't have to drag him in you don't have to beg him to come in he will come in and he said I will come into him notice I will come into him and I will sup with him that means I will have dinner with him I will have intimate fellowship with him and he with me rinker said prayer is dialogue between two people who love each other the prayer is not just monologue you know what I think I think Baptist we need to quit saying our prayers and get back to praying our prayers I like to get in a red hot Irish prayer meeting because those people brother when they pray it's like they're not going to take God take no for an answer and it's kind of like they're suing God for whatever they want now he says this the prayer is dialogue between two people who love each other you know you know what the meaning of the prayer life is to be on praying ground simply means you're on speaking terms with Jesus Christ now you married people you know what it is when you're not on speaking terms with your mate don't you don't look too pious no you know what it's like when you're not on speaking terms with your mate brothers sister I want to tell you to be on praying grounds just means that you're on speaking terms with the son of God you're in vital contact you're in vital union with him now tonight I I'm not going to preach to you as much as I am going to share my testimony with you tonight because I have a sneaking suspicion far too many can relate to this pitiful testimony concerning the prayer life I grew up in Southside Virginia the son of a tobacco farmer and when I came I never heard the gospel until I was about 14 or 15 years old I had to go to a gospel film at a public high school we grew up in a liberal church where we had preaching every other week whether we needed it or not the pastor had four congregations they called it a charge they should have called it a dud but I grew up in this context I finally heard the gospel and received the Lord and would you believe it took me three years to find a bible-believing church you said well good night man you're from Virginia you're from the bible belt let me clear up a clear up a misconception there is no bible belt in the United States there is no bible belt there's a church belt but there's no bible belt in the south most people don't go to church to meet God it's more of a social cultural family obligation type thing than it is an encounter with the living God it's a church belt okay and we have a church belt so it took me three years to find a bible-believing church a little bible study had started up and it finally turned into a local church well I got into this thing and I want to tell you I was coming out of Casper milquetoast uh liberal uh labyrinth and here I get into this red hot on fire independent pre-millennial evangelistic soul winning separated born again baptist church man I've never I've never seen anything like in my life and when I got in there they told us what not to do they said why don't you drink alcohol and they were strong about this and they said don't you smoke uh cigarettes and my dad was a tobacco farmer for crying out loud and then they said now don't you go to the dance hall you'll lose your testimony and then they said stay out of the pool hall man you shouldn't be in those dens of iniquity so they told us what not to do and then they also told us what to do they said why you ought to come to church every time the doors are open and the doors were open just about 24 hours a day and they said you need to come to church every time the doors are open you need to read your bible every day and then they told us to tithe and they told us to tithe and they told us to tithe and they told us to tithe and they told us to tithe we'd give a whole month every year on tithing for crying out loud it's almost like they thought the congregation was retarded or something they couldn't pick up on it well he told us to tithe and then they told us to pray now the implication was that if you do all the do's and dodge all the don'ts then you'll be right with god i got news for you friend you can do all the do's and dodge all the don'ts and not even be born again the cults do the do's and dodge the don'ts and they're not even saved the idea was don't walk in the flesh and you will be in the spirit but the bible doesn't say that the bible says walk in the spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh it was almost like doing and not doing made you spiritual which is not true at all brother when you're filled with god you'll abstain from some behaviors and you will engage in certain disciplines yes praise god but those things itself are not the ticket it's not a legal way you know but anyway i got in this church and i want to tell you it was it was a good experience and you know when i got in the church they told me to pray and i wanted to pray and i knew i ought to pray and i tried to pray but let's be honest about it when you first get saved you really gotta get used to talking to somebody you can't see i mean it is a new experience is it not and i remember back in those days how that uh man i know how to pray and i want to pray and i'm gonna try to pray but i didn't know how to pray and i had a real problem often when i would pray it seemed like it seemed like i wasn't making contact with god often when i prayed it seemed like there was a barrier between me and god it seems like the heavens were brassed over i mean it seemed like my prayers would ricochet off the ceiling and hit me in the face about as quick as they came out of my mouth anybody here when you pray sometimes feel like you're not making contact with god you know what i'm talking about shake your head if you know what i know what i'm talking about right there and uh brother that's the way i felt a lot but i supposed to pray the bible said pray i wanted to pray so i tried to pray so i'd crank out something just to go through the motions you know let's don't make too much fun of the rosary crowd because we've got our old little prayer beads to where we just say the same thing over and over that doesn't have any meaning either it's good preaching and i would pray like this right here lord thank you for today and lord just be with my family lord and lord help me not to have these evil thoughts and lord help me lord to be a better christian and you know you know let's be honest about it there's not a whole lot of god enjoyment when you have to struggle for every syllable there's not a whole lot of god enjoyment when you're pretty much just repeating the same thing you heard somebody else say or the same thing you've already said about a thousand times there's not a really a whole lot of sense of connection with god but i knew i supposed to pray i wanted to pray i tried to pray and i just drudged on and every now and then i would have a a blessed encounter of of intercourse with god in prayer but often i would get the sealing treatment well i remember i started preaching and you know whenever you start preaching or getting up in public you're pretty much forced into praying more than the average person and uh because if you don't they'll all be able to tell how flat you are so you're pretty much forced into praying more and i remember one summer we uh we did a tour of 80 churches in three months 80 churches in three months we did 40 states in three months and i remember driving from new mexico one saturday night to colorado and got in late and got up early and i had to preach and i want to tell you i woke up on sunday morning and i did not feel spiritual how many can relate to that point right there i did not feel spirit i didn't feel like going to church i didn't feel like preaching i sure didn't feel like praying i felt like going back to bed man i was exhausted but i said man i better get out here and pray because i'm as flat as can be i'm as dead as four o'clock so i got on my knees at the edge of the bed and i was praying there that day of course i had had this with me and i was praying like this i said i said dear god please be with my family lord and lord please help me not have these evil thoughts and lord please be in the service and would you believe i fell asleep passed out 30 minutes later i woke up i couldn't even remember what i was doing but i was on my knees so i figured i must have been praying because that's the only thing i did on my knees i'd apologize to god and i said sorry about that lord but i'm back again here now god and brother that's the kind of prayer life i had for a long time to where it just seemed like i wasn't breaking through into the presence of god well every now and then i would have one of these blessed blessed times of prayer well let me tell you that back at that home church where i grew up they decided to have a revival a revival meeting now how many of you know what revival means in the south in a red hot on fire pre-millennial scoffield uh evangelistic uh missionary minded born again separated on fire baptist church i'll tell you what it means brother you get the most high-powered evangelist you can find to come in and scorch the socks off the congregation that's what it's all about now they brought in a nuclear powered evangelist i mean that guy i've never seen anything like it that guy got up there like a like a ball of fire and man he began to preach against sin and there in that very first meeting and that that revival service i'll never forget how that he preached on sin he just happened to preach on the five sins that i personally was guilty of there that first night in revival meeting i'm telling you everything that guy said was true i'm telling you the guilt was overwhelming i mean as he sat there and he began to go through and expound i thought he must have talked to my mother i mean everything he said fit me to a tee and every time that finger was about a foot long everything that time that finger would point out brother it was always in my face and every time those beady eyes would come peering out from behind the sacred desk man it was almost like i had superman x-ray vision man they were pointing it on me every time i'm sitting there about to fall out about to pass out under conviction well i didn't wait for the invitation i made my way down to the altar you know back in those days in our church um i used i used to get in a conviction in every service i used to come forward every time and it was it gets almost to the point where they should have put a little reserved plaque for herald up here you know one of those gold plaques you know and nobody else seemed to be bothered and nobody else seemed to get on conviction but every service i'd come to i'd get on to i mean deep conviction of sin and i used to think man i must be the worst christian in the bunch nobody else seems to be bothered and i'll tell you something friend if you get under conviction a lot that's not a sign you're the worst christian in the bunch that's just a sign that you're still near enough to god to where you can hear him and andrew murray said when you thank your father from god than you've ever been you're probably nearer to god than you've ever been oh but i didn't feel near to god my conscience was smitten i made my way down the altar i had had the carpet worn out my path coming down you know and i was down there at the altar and praying and i said here's the way i prayed i said oh god please forgive me of all my sins you you ever pull that one a little blanket coverage going on here it's almost like now lord i don't have time to go into detail tonight and god rather than pray uh retail i'm praying wholesale and uh lord rather than praying brand name i'm just going to go generic here and uh lord it's kind of like uh lord rather than then go through the whole list i'm just going to kind of bundle the whole thing up and put them in a big bushel and lord please forgive me of all my sin and just drop the whole lot well that's the way the deacons prayed blanket coverage you know it works pretty good with the insurance people but it doesn't cut it when it comes to confessing sin to god well i thought that's what i was supposed to do so i went over and shook the preacher's hand and the preacher turned around i told him i said i've come to rededicate my life to the lord now that's what we used to do you know rededication is nowhere to be found in the bible that's another invention we ought to we ought to trash but uh if you go back on your dedication to god you don't need to rededicate you need to repent of where you went back but i didn't know that and i went over and very sincere and told the preacher i said preacher i shouldn't be smiling but i said preacher i was very serious i said i've come to rededicate my life to the lord man he turned around and that crowd was fired up you folks need to make a trip down south to find out what i'm talking about here but this crowd was wired tight i mean they were they were wide open and that pastor said brother harold has come tonight to rededicate his life how many are excited for brother harold they shouted man amen and uh and then he said brother how many gonna be praying for brother harold they all shouted a rafter rafter raising shouts amen and i thought man this is great here i am in a bible believing church i couldn't believe it when i came to that church i had hair halfway down my back i had a jesus saves bumper sticker on my 71 pinto i had a black king james zip up bible i had a pair of uh wore out dungarees with a one-way sign on them i didn't know much but buddy i was excited about jesus and those people loved me to death and i thought here i am in a bible believing church man a revival meeting i rededicated to christ and you know what i thought smooth sailing from here on right well not exactly now i've learned a little bit since those days i'll tell you what i've learned when it comes to confessing your sin you don't confess them all at one time you confess them like you commit them one at a time the bible says if we confess our sins plural yes then god is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness you see you see what we need tonight people we need more than forgiveness what we need is cleansing you get forgiveness by confession but you get cleansing by walking in the light and i have learned that since that those days that when it comes to being honest with god you don't confess all of your sin at once but rather you confess your sins like you've committed them lord i've been worried about this god i've had a bad attitude about that lord i wasn't really honest here lord i didn't respond properly uh to my family on this point you see that's the way to get the ear of god is by telling god the truth but for years for years man i just pulled out that blanket coverage forgive me of all my sins prayer and and and and missed out on getting the ear of god well i got into my second stage of prayer and here's the way it went something like this lord help me to be a better student of your word lord help me to be more obedient to my parents lord help me to be a better soul winner lord help me not to have these evil thoughts i prayed that every time i ever prayed by the way and lord uh lord help me to be a better christian now let's let's be honest about it friend what is a better christian have you ever met a better christian i mean you know what that was that was just a way for me to get out of telling god that i was a fairly sorry christian you see it was a it was a save face measure it was a moral dodge to get out of telling god the truth and you know it took me about 12 years to figure out that god's not interested in being my assistant and if i could say to you tonight god's not the least bit interested in being your associate either when jesus comes into your life he doesn't come to just help you out he comes to take you over and i want to tell you the proper prayer is not lord help me to do better next time when you should be praying dear god forgive me of the last time don't pray lord help me pray lord forgive me you know most of the time when we're praying asking for help it's too late for help we don't need help what we need is forgiveness don't pray lord lord help me pray lord forgive me don't pray lord help me pray lord have me i got nothing to offer but failure but god here i am the prayer of surrender is the prayer that gets the year of god but i didn't know that and i used to think that if i could just get god to help me out brother i could really pull off something for jesus you know i thought you know when i came to lord i thought man the lord's really got something now i found out later he had something he had a liability and uh brother uh but i used to think that if i could just get god to help me out boy i could really pull off something for jesus well here i was and and with all that help me stuff forgive me of all my sin stuff just just a moral dodge and it didn't get the barrier down well i got to my third stage now back home what we had was a watch night service anybody ever been to a watch night new year's eve service now what they used to do in the old days was to get a guilty voking evangelist to come in and remind you of every sorry thing you'd done the year before that you shouldn't have done and then to also remind you of all the good things you should have done that you didn't do and he would really pour it on and some of those some of those sinai preachers brother can really put it over on you you know what i'm saying i mean there's no hope man and uh and then around midnight the whole congregation would get around the altar and would pray in the new year and would make new year's eve resolutions now how many of you ever made a new year's eve resolution let's see the hands all right here they are how many of you ever kept one two hands okay they're probably probably lying but anyway i know i'm just i'm just kidding i'm just kidding i'm just kidding no no offense no offense don't be mad but but anyhow the point being we make all these resolutions that we don't have power to keep i remember when uh our second son was born about about uh two or three years uh after the first and you know children love children i mean you get two little kids two little babies together man they want to go and play with each other and hold each other and they love you know children love children and we also learned that uh children uh have cannibalistic tendencies that they do tend to bite and devour one another and and one day uh michael was about four years old and and brandon was around two and and they were in the uh floor in the nursery playing when my wife and i were in the office doing work when we heard a blood-curdling cry come out of the nursery so we go rushing in and what do we find teeth imprints in the baby's arm quarter inch deep i said michael get over here i said did you bite your baby brother yeah dad now there's a period in childhood development when they don't even know enough to lie and this is the quickest period of childhood development they quickly outgrow this stage but uh he said uh yeah i did it he didn't understand cause and effect i thought man we got a politician on our hands but anyhow i said now what you've got to do you have hurt your brother look at him he's weeping get over there and apologize and tell him you're sorry trying to teach him to clear his conscience so he goes over and hugs his baby brother sorry brandon i said get back over here gonna bite him again oh no dad do you promise i promise so i thought well we got that taken care of 20 minutes a blood-curdling scream comes out of the nursery we go rushing in teeth imprints this time in the baby's leg a quarter inch deep i said michael get over here did you bite your brother yeah dad what what you just told me you weren't gonna do it man go tell him you're sorry so he goes over there sorry brandon i said get back over here you're gonna bite him again oh no dad do you promise he didn't know what promise meant and he didn't quit biting his brother and other children until an evangelist came by and their little girl bit the daylights out of him and that took care of the biting problem he's not bitten anybody since now you know what i begin to learn i begin to learn when my children mess up i don't want them coming up making a bunch of promises i know they don't have the power to keep oh i'll never run in church again dad yeah right oh i'll never go across the street after the ball again dad i'll never say that dad yeah right no no when my children mess up you know what i want them to hear you know what i want to hear him say dad sorry you know how hard that is for a five-year-old 10-year-old 15-year-old it gets progressively more difficult if you don't develop this habit early on i think and when we mess up god doesn't want us coming up making a bunch of promises he knows that we don't have the power to keep you know what god wants to hear father i was wrong sorry but brother i want to tell you all this promise you know peter was the first promise keeper by the way in less than 24 hours he's cursing and denying the lord and that's just a model for the rest of us we don't have what it takes to keep the promises you see i was in bible college kept hearing these sermons on tithing and finally figured out i was already tithing my income so i decided well i'm gonna start tithing my time i thought this was original so i wrote god a letter in the front of my bible i was very sincere i dated it still have it and uh i said dear god i promise you for the rest of my life i'm gonna spend and i thought i'm gonna tithe my time so there's 24 hours in a day so that means 10 of 24 hours is how much two hours and 40 minutes yes you went to public school also but so that's what i put down there but that's not exactly the way it is and um but that's what i put i said lord i'm gonna spend two hours and 40 minutes a day in prayer and i was very sincere and you know what i thought i thought hey this is at least i can do for the son of god who loved me and gave himself for me i ought to be able to spend at least 10 percent of my uh time in communion with god i thought this was very reasonable you know so i i i signed it dated it wrote god a letter now anybody want to guess how long i made it two days no no not not even one day i couldn't come up with 25 minutes worth of original material to talk to god about much less two hours and 40 minutes and i'll give you a little tip if you're not spending 15 minutes a day alone with god in the place of prayer don't go promising god you're going to spend three hours with him because you're not going to be able to make it friend god's not interested in us making a bunch of promises we can't keep you know what he's interested in he's interested in people who are honest and real and genuine and transparent so i struggle on in my prayer life with all of these shenanigans and i remember how that my wife and i we've been out on the road in evangelism and you know when you first get saved god gives you a spiritual boost your spiritual gas tank is on full you got a golden glow around you it's almost like you look like a rembrandt painting i mean there's a radiance coming off of you or when you uh start out in a ministry god baptizes you with a energy and a power and but you know after a while the glow wears off and the spiritual gas tank moves from full down toward e and i want to tell you uh it's a sign when the creek dries up it's time for you to move on well i want to tell you the creek had dried up brother and here i was in a bad state and didn't know what was wrong i was traveling all over the country trying to tell people how to be revived i was just wishing somebody would come along and tell me how to get revived i'll never forget preaching with a distinct impression i'm speaking to empty people but the only problem was i was emptier than they were these people were hurting i think i was worse off than them and i didn't know what to do well i got myself into a state where i'd been taken advantage of a few times and lied to a few times and a few other things and i kind of just kind of had it up to here and i don't know if you've ever been to that point but you'll get there sometime and maybe you'll know how to handle it i were in yakima washington i was very tense very hard to live with a tense man i was expecting all the women to say amen on that point right there but but very difficult to live with a tense man and i and i got up one morning in the motel and i know you're gonna have a hard time believing this but i yelled at my wife i see those shocked looks of unbelief i i i yell at my wife and i stormed out of the motel room and i i'm telling you i just couldn't go on the way i was i kind of just headed up to here and i remember just storming out slamming the door and walking over a couple of drunk indians laying on the sidewalk up there and i thought oh god there's got to be more to it than what i'm experiencing i didn't premeditate this i didn't plan this i didn't go to a seminar that told me to do this it just kind of happened spontaneous and i prayed a new way for the first time and here's the way i prayed i said dear god i said god this is all there is to the christian life lord if this is all there is to the christian life then god you can just have it my friend i had never talked to god in that tone and i never talked to god in those terms i never thought i could and never thought i should but i was at a point where i just couldn't go on i said well i'm just going to tell god the truth so here's the way i pray i said lord i've not been getting anything out of my bible study lord absolutely nothing i said god i i've been having these evil thoughts and lord i don't be able to see able to control it lord and heavenly father i want to tell you that um i've lost my burden for souls to be honest lord i couldn't care less whether people went to heaven or hell i said god uh i've not been loving my wife like like christ loved the church and as a matter of fact lord i yelled at her this morning and then i thought to myself now you've gone and done it now now you've done it you've spilled the beans and now god knows what you're like i'm not kidding i'm not trying to be funny i thought to myself it's curtains for you now son now god knows what you're really like as if he didn't already know two thousand years ago what i was already like but uh i thought to myself well i've let the cat out of the bag i might as well tell him the rest of it so i for the first time in my life i took the witness stand against my own heart and agreed with god and got honest in the presence of god i wasn't asking for god's assistance i wasn't making god promises i wasn't asking for blanket coverage i was just telling them the truth lord i want to tell you i've been full of worry and anxiety and god i've had hard feelings about towards some of these people for some things that have happened and lord i've done this and i've done that and i've thought this and i've struggled with that and for the first time in my life i begin to pour out and i begin to cast all my care and i begin to confess my sins and agree with god about the whole ball of wax and i want to tell you i was devastated i'm telling i'm telling you i thought god was through with me and that thing must have gone on for about 45 minutes just a continual uh confession of sin without any repetition and it just went on and on and i began to unburden my soul and to and to clear out my heart of all this garbage and you know after about 45 minutes the strangest thing happened i was sitting there with a broken broken grieving mourning heart when all of a sudden i confessed one final sin and you know what happened brother i want to tell you the sun began to break through in my soul the jordan parted the cloud cover lifted and here i was for the first time in a long time enjoying the sense of the smile and presence of god i want to tell you joy flooded my heart man i ran back to the motel room and apologized to my wife which is a sure sign i had met god in revival and asked her to forgive me for yelling at her and and then i told my wife i made the greatest discovery i've ever made i said honey i found out you can afford to be honest with god you know if you want to develop a relationship with somebody the key is honesty and if you want to develop a relationship with god the key is transparent judgment day honesty you ever talk to somebody and all the talking to them you sense that they're not being up front and not being genuine and not being real you know how you feel when you talk to somebody like that how do you think god feels when he talks to us when we're putting on that front that mask of pretense you know i found a text to support my experience later on down the road 2 corinthians chapter 3 verse 17 says now the lord is that spirit and where the spirit of the lord is there he is there's there's liberty there's freedom there's there's tremendous uh latitude and liberty in christ and then it says but we all with an open face the marginal rendering says but we all with an unveiled face beholding is in the mirror the glory of the lord we're changed into the same image from glory to glory even as by the spirit of god i thought lord no wonder i've had this deadbeat prayer life because i've had this veil this covering between me and you i read it in uh psalm 66 18 if i look if i look favorably upon sin the lord will not hear me if i regard iniquity in my heart the lord will not hear me i felt like god wasn't listening you know why because he wasn't you know why because isaiah 59 your sins have separated between you and your god and i thought lord no wonder no wonder i've struggled in the place of prayer because i've had this sin that's broken my fellowship with you well i want to tell you friend god will never let you down god will never let you down but he'll never let you off without telling the truth honesty is not the best policy when it comes to prayer it's the only policy that gets the ear of god and i want to say that the gospel is not good advice for good people the gospel is not good advice for good people it's good news for bad people and i want to tell you that sinners are the only people that qualify for salvation when they own up and admit their sin against god and i want to tell you that christians don't get revived until they start confessing their sins roy hessian said revival is when the best people in the church start acting like sinners and confessing their sins we're kind of prone to confess the other man's sins are we not you know the crowd that's not here where are all those people at listen friend revival doesn't start with the people that are farthest from god it starts with those that are nearest to god and i want to tell you it starts with the crowd that's that's willing to take the witness stand against their own hearts you see if some of you stood up here tonight and told us what you've really done your friends would be shocked your parents would be shocked your family would be shocked your pastors would be shocked if you stood and told us what you've really done but i got great news for you jesus is the great unshockable one and you got nothing to tell him that's going to shake him up you got nothing to tell jesus friend that's going to surprise him because he's already anticipated you to be the kind of person that you are he's already anticipated that we would do the things we would do say the things we would say and think the thoughts we would think he's already anticipated us to be that way in advance and he's dealt with it on the cross to the father's satisfaction and sees how he's already anticipated us to be that kind of person i want to tell you that he bore it on the cross and that shock is over now and you got nothing to tell him that's going to shock him i remember when i was out on the street in yakima and for the first time i began to get honest with god about who i was and what i'd had done and what i felt i'll tell you friend i felt so small and then what a relief it came to me when i finally discovered god knew in advance i was going to be that way and do all that stuff and i want to tell you when i was out there in a brokenness of heart so broken before god i can imagine the father was up in heaven smiling and i can imagine he was up there saying come on son come on now it's taking me about 10 years to get you honest but the blood's got you covered son come on bring it all out bring it all out get it under the blood i want to tell you that confession is not so much for god as it is for us because god already knows the whole truth and he's just waiting for us to own up listen friend it is surely sufficient for me it is surely sufficient for me if the blood of christ is sufficient for god if the high god of heaven is satisfied with what his son has done then can't you be satisfied as well and i want to tell you it's a wonder it's a wonder this is not a message of bondage and guilt brother this is a message of liberation and freedom when we learn the power of the blood to set us free now god never convicts you of your sin to condemn you as a christian never because there's no condemnation to them that are in christ jesus who walk after the spirit and not after the flesh i used to think that god's best gifts were on the top shelf where you'd have to strive a harder and climb higher and only the a few of the spiritual elite could ever get up there but you know what i found out the best gifts are not on the top shelf where you got to struggle and strive you get to man the best gifts on the bottom shelf where we got to bend our old proud stiff necks to get down at them why because god resisted the proud stiff arms the proud but gives grace to the humble who are the humble the most unworthy the most unlikely the most undeserving do you understand that when god can find a sinner saved or saved or unsaved sinner that's willing to humble themselves under the mighty hand of god that the grace ambulance comes like a like an ambulance to the scene of an accident because when we humble ourselves he pours out grace upon us now honesty is not the best policy it's the only policy that will cut it in your prayer life don't ask god to fill you until you first of all admit you're empty don't ask god oh for a thousand tongues to sing until you first confess you've not been using the one you've got don't tell god you're going to be doing better next round until you go ahead and tell god lord i i didn't do too good on the last round now let me see if i can illustrate this for you let's say we have a cup here full of liquid and let's say that pastor helm i've been thinking of a text you know for for pastor pastor joe and i came up with it woe unto you lawyers uh it's a marvelous text but let's just say that uh just a joke just a joke but anyhow let's say i've got this cup here full of water and uh pastor helm comes up here and gives me a mighty shove for that comment that i just made and comes up here and really just shakes my arm like that now you know what's going to come flying out of the cup if he shakes my arm with the cup well whatever's in it if it's full of sprite and he shakes it sprite would come out if it's full of hydrochloric acid and he shakes my arm acid would come out if it's full of water and he shakes my arm water would come out and brother i want to tell you when you get shook whatever you're full of is going to come out hey when you got shook today on your job when you get shook in your church when you get shook at home yeah that happens sometimes when you get shook what comes out brother if you're full of jesus he spills out but buddy if you're full of the flesh and full of yourself it comes out does it not you know why god lets you and i get shook so much it's because god wants us to know what we're full of and you're not never going to get full of god until you get emptied of this other and the way you get emptied of this other is by going to a fountain filled with blood drawn from emmanuel's veins and telling god the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth and i want to tell you tonight it's okay to tell god the truth you can afford to be honest with god in fact that's the only way you're going to build a relationship with him is by honesty we were in a afterglow meeting one night in the church we had a lot of people older people come and uh i'm changing my mind about what that means older people but uh we had a lot of older people this is back in the old days and we had a couple of testimonies in this afterglow meeting and then then this red-haired fellow young man he said i i want to say something i said go ahead and he said i'm a sunday school teacher in the church but i'm not fit to be a sunday school teacher he said the truth is i'm not even doing what i'm telling my 10 year old students they ought to be doing he said i'm a hypocrite i'm not even doing it myself and he broke down in tears and then he said i don't know anything about leading my family in the things of god and he broke down in tears sobbing and weeping and the people begin to be uncomfortable they never heard a reality uh testimony before it was most about what happened 50 years ago but here this guy was telling that he was a flop and uh man they started looking down at the floor and looking at their feet and they were uncomfortable and i thought man i don't know what's going on here either and then he said um i'm not a witness where i work he said i'm probably a detriment to the cause of christ and he started weeping now this guy would confess a sin and weep and i'm talking about weep and sob and confess a sin and weep and man after about four or five minutes i thought what in the world's going on and and uh but then i began to say wait a minute wait a minute i've been down this road and if he keeps this up he's going to get that cup of sin emptied out and once he gets that cup of sin emptied out brother jordan's going to part and the clouds are going to come down so i'm smiling on the inside but trying to look serious on the outside and after about seven or eight minutes he finally confessed one final sin and you could tell you could tell he had gotten through because all of a sudden that guy his whole countenance changed and man he's quick weeping and he started smiling and he said well i just want to thank god for forgiving me of all these sins and he started weeping and praising god and you know it's so rare in our meetings that anybody gets anything real we just let him go and man he was praising god and weeping and thanking god and weeping and i thought to myself man this is good this old boy's got through and after he finally finished you know what i said i said folks what this brother did here tonight he didn't have to do that in front of us but i'm glad he did it because he showed us how every day we need to get emptied we need to get cleansed we need to get forgiven and we need to get filled and he showed us he showed us how that honesty and really openness and honesty is the prelude to brokenness which leads to oneness with god and i want to tell you friend the bible says casting all your care on him for he cares for you you realize that calvary won't cover what you need to uncover in a fellowship sense i'm not for morbid introspection i am for holy ghost inspection and calvary won't cover what you need to uncover and i want to tell you if you want to have meaningful fellowship with god just get honest with god just get it under the blood you might be a long ways from god but you're only one step away from calvary if you're willing to come by the way of the cross casting all your care on him for he cares for you if you're worried tonight you can tell him sister told me last night she had a had a problem with anxiety well millions of people do it's common to man if you're worried you can tell him if you're discouraged you can tell him if you're cold you can tell him if you've lost your burden for people you can tell him if you're hurting you can tell him if you're bitter you can tell him if you're confused you can tell him i'm telling you friend we have a savior that can be touched with the feelings of our infirmities he's been tempted in all points like as we are yet without sin and he can identify with us and he knows how weak we are and all he's waiting for is us to quit trying to pretend to be something that we're not and just to get honest and real and open in the presence of god and i'm telling you i'm telling you the grace ambulance comes and the blood of jesus cleanses us from all unrighteousness you know when we say we're wrong god says you're right the moment you say lord i'm wrong i confess i agree that that was sin then god says you're right you can't be any more right and i want to tell you the blood puts you back in fellowship with god and i'm telling you there's a wonder working power in the blood of calvary i want to deny friend are you enjoying god or enduring god have you been enjoying your bible study or has that become laborious are you enjoying your prayer life or is that going to be a burden and a duty rather listen we ought to get to the place where it's not a have to it's a get to you don't have to pray you get to pray you don't have to live a holy life you get to live a holy life you don't have to witness you get to witness it's not a have to it's a get to and i want to tell you friend we need to get on the freedom side of calvary on the far side of the cross brother where there's resurrection life and i'm telling you i believe this is the way to get through to god he said behold i stand at the door and knock and if any man hear my voice and open the door i'll come into him i'll have intimate fellowship with him he'll have intimate fellowship with me brother that's the meaning of the prayer life and isn't it a blessed thing we can be on speaking terms with the son of god isn't that something that brother he's condescended he's taken the sinner's place he's paid our debt and he's paved the way to where we can have perennial fellowship with him i want you tonight not to leave out of here beat down and bogged down and condemned in your heart friend i want you to leave out of here tonight with your cup emptied of whatever's in it that's unlike jesus just get all that out just tell him the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth get that old veil down man quit regarding that iniquity in your heart don't let that sin separate between you and god and come by the fountain filled with blood and brother you can come up on the other side enjoying the very presence and fellowship with god himself and that's the will of god i stand at the door knock if any man hear my voice and open the door i'll come into him i'll fellowship with him and he with me brethren we are privileged people to be able to have fellowship with a holy god because of his holy son and the price he paid to put us in good standing with him it's surely sufficient for me and it's surely sufficient for you good news for bad people father thank you tonight that the gospel is good news and god i pray for some that may be struggling in their prayer life and father i pray tonight would be a night of revival in the prayer life