In this sermon, the preacher emphasizes the importance of doing the small and simple things in life. He encourages men to prioritize the hidden acts of service over seeking fame and recognition. The preacher then shifts his focus to the topic of disciplining children, controversially suggesting that parents should never discipline their children but rather train them. He highlights the need for time and patience in raising children and warns against neglecting this responsibility. The sermon concludes with a reminder for men to prioritize their roles as husbands and fathers, taking care of themselves in order to pour out more to their families and communities.

Let's open up our Bibles to Genesis chapter one. I'm going to try to cover several different things here, so we're going to move kind of fast and jump around a bit. But there are several things that I want to put forth. First of all, from what I understand about many of you here, that that. Many of you are quite serious about raising your families. And you take that seriously. And that's why I've preached what I've preached. I could go to some places and preach. And what I'd be primarily preaching on is, look, you need to look at the Scriptures. You need to be you need to look at the principles of Scripture, the wisdom of Scripture. You need to be conforming your marriage, your wife, your life, yourself, everything to what is written. You need to have devotionals. You need to maybe be teaching your children, maybe catechizing. You need to turn away from the world. There's a lot of things you need to cut out of your life. But I know there are many families here that are already doing that. And so what I wanted to do is come from another angle. You see, the Christian life is a very narrow road. But here's the great problem. There's not just a ditch on one side, there's a ditch on both sides. And so you can be a family that falls into the ditch over to the left, my left, in which you're worldly. You're worldly, you're not taking any of this seriously as a man, you're not leading your home, you're not seeking to conform your life to the principles of Scripture, you're not being discerning, you're not being judged, judging in a proper way. You're just you're just being lazy, apathetic and worldly in your home and your life and with your children. And that's falling into a ditch. But then there's the men and the women who are very serious about every aspect of their stewardship of family, and they're seeking to do everything the way they ought to. And that is to be applauded, to be applauded. I want to be more like that. And yet there's a ditch for us, too, isn't there that we can lose the spirit of the thing? We can lose the main idea, which is a revelation of God through the gospel of Jesus Christ. Conrad Murrell said this one time, he's an old Sovereign Grace preacher, he's he's probably forgotten more about God than I'll ever know. And he said this walking in falsehood is is broad. You can walk a thousand miles this way and a thousand miles that way and still be in falsehood. But walking in truth is like walking on the edge of a razor blade and you can fall off on either side. Isn't that true? Isn't that true? And it's so hard when you're teaching a group of people, because there's some people in which they need to hear, look, you need to look at some of these principles of scripture and you conform your life to it. Look, you need to be very careful what your children are watching, what your family's wearing. You need to you need to take care of this. This is slothful and wrong. And there's some people like that. And then you preach in the congregation, but there's other people who, man, they're very serious about that. But in all their striving against sin and to be holy, maybe they've forgotten their first love. Need to go back to understanding this is about the gospel. So that's what I'm trying to do. All right. In Genesis chapter one, I want to teach one more thing on marriage before I jump over into family. And again, this is I'm trying to reduce down about 28 sermons. So, you know, be merciful to me. Genesis chapter one, and I want you to look at verse twenty six, then God said, let us make man in our own image according to our likeness and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the ground. And God created man in his own image and the image of God. He created him male and female. He created them. Now, one of the purposes that I brought up about marriage is to be conformed to the image of Christ. But the other, along with this, that parallels it is that we come together in a marriage in order to do what? In order to extend, to advance God's kingdom or God's rule upon the earth. This was given to Adam at the very beginning. He was to go out. He was to he was to advance. He was to labor. He was to do everything, seeking to bring all things in subjection to the will of God. That is our purpose today. Now, I have heard a lot of people in the last 10 years talk about this a great deal. But one of the things that bothers me is they always seem to take a political, social, political, economic slant with regard to this, that we need to change society through politics. We need to change society through this and that and every sort of thing. Well, every aspect of life, Christianity touches and all things are important. But when we talk about advancing the kingdom today, we are talking primarily about advancing the kingdom spiritually through the preaching of the gospel and the advance, the growth, the edification of the church, that the gospel be preached everywhere in the world. Now, you and your husband or you and your wife come together, should come together from the very beginning. And if not at the beginning, as soon as you hear this kind of truth, you need to start doing it. You come together to be conformed to the image of Christ. That knowing that without my spouse, I would never be what God wants me to be, but he's going to use my spouse to conform me to his image now, where both spouses are believers and both spouses have made this commitment, then they turn themselves to to what the purpose of our marriage is not just self-satisfaction. It's not just self-fulfillment. It's not having just a great life and then retiring quietly to a wonderful place where we can just play golf or walk around and kick pebbles on a beach. But our purpose in this marriage is to come together, that united we might serve the Lord, that we might be a part of advancing his kingdom, his kingdom. Now, borrowing a statement from from William Carey, one of our things that we say at heart cry all the time is this. Everyone is called to be a part of the Great Commission, everyone, and that's not just the Great Commission in some foreign land, but the spreading of the gospel everywhere, starting with our local churches, every one of us as a married, as a couple, as a family, we should either do one or the other. We should either go down in the well, as William Carey said, or we should hold the rope for those who go down. All of us should be involved as husband and wife, as our children, once they're converted, we should all be involved in a local church, in a local church. OK, this is extremely important. My question is not, do you attend the local church? My question is, how are you participating in the edification and advance of that local church? Because attendance really means nothing to me or God. How are you involved in advancing the gospel through your local church as a married as a married couple and as as a family? And then the idea of going down into the well, what did William Carey mean? Well, when he was going to go to India, he said, gentlemen, I will go down into the well. Into that mine, he said, actually. Which is India, mine of souls. But if I go down, gentlemen, you must hold the rope for me. And that's what I want you to see. Your purpose is not just to have a clean family. But it's to have a clean family, a sanctified family, that you might be a useful instrument of God in doing what? Advancing the kingdom, starting with your local church and spreading out from that committed to a body of Christ, submitted to a group of men, elders that are seeking God's heart and seeking to work together to advance God's kingdom. This is where you're going to find your purpose. This is what it's about. It's about doing that. Now, let's just stop. We can stop right here, couldn't we? And all I have to do is hand out a piece of paper and say, OK, truth, number one, you should be practically involved in advancing the kingdom as a married couple. Now, write me a paragraph and explain to me how you're doing that in your local church. Explain to me how you're doing that in your family, explain to me how God is using you in some way, either to go down into the mine or the well or to hold the rope for those who go down. In other words, show me the scars on your hands, because if you're hanging from the rope or you're holding the person hanging from the rope, you're going to have calluses and scars on your hands. Where are your scars? Where are your calluses? You see, John Piper, it was right when he said when he looked at the Sermon on the Mount, he looked at the idea of prayer and he said prayer is a walkie talkie for those involved in warfare. It's not about, Lord, bless me, bless me, help me, help me, bless me, bless me. It's Lord, strengthen me, enable me, give me what I need to advance your kingdom. And that's what family is about. You know, we all know the illustration that if the river flows into the pond and the pond, the water doesn't flow out of the pond, it just becomes stagnant. That's the way it is in an individual's life. If you're not ministering, you will become stagnant. I don't care if you're studying the Bible 24 hours a day. If you're not pouring out as much as that's being poured into you, then it's just not going to work. If you're a member of this local church. No, the pastor isn't asking you to say this. If you're a member of this local church attendance, really, it's not like a mark. You're not going to get like a Sunday school star for attending. How are you ministering in this body according to your gifts? Which may mean like who knows what it may mean, but don't despise it. It could mean something as spectacular as teaching or it could mean service service. You know, I love my pastor and I'm and the other men that are being trained to be elders. I just I'm amazed. But you know what most amazed me is when I stand back in the corner and I watch people who are serving, serving, serving, always there to serve, always there to do whatever needs to be done. And I just look at that and I go, behold, the kingdom of God. The power of the Holy Spirit, I don't say that much when I see people preach, but when I see people serving unnoticed, I go the magnificence of God's power. And so I want you to see that you must you must you must become involved. In this, that his name be great among the nations from the rising to the setting of the sun that I was during the break, you know, I was back there fellowshipping with a lot of Chinese believers and we got to talking about some servants that I know of who have died serving Christ or someone else. I told a story of who suffered terribly in Indonesia and is now working in a place, a little little woman, two little women who are working in a place in Indonesia among the Muslims. And the reason they're there by their self is because there's no man brave enough to go. You know, I'm just talking about won't it be glorious the day we get to heaven and and we get to hear these stories. And then I said, but, you know, I don't want to be ashamed on that day. I want to have some stories of my own. What did it cost me? What did I do? And I've seen some of the most what I would consider biblically successful people, biblically successful families, biblically successful couples that they cared about their inward life as a family and as individuals. But it was a means of an expression to be able to do something for the body of Christ and through the body of Christ. Now, having said that, I want us to run over really quick. Just go to Matthew and I want to show you something that I feel is very important. Let's go to Matthew, chapter six, in verse nine of chapter six. Pray then in this way, our father who is in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts as we have also forgiven our debtors and do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil for yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen. Now, if you want a picture. I think we have here maybe the clearest picture, especially in verses nine and ten of the heart of our Lord. This this is the picture of his heart. Now, I want you to think about something in many prayer meetings, I mean, I really don't like going to a lot of prayer meetings in America because it seems to be all about verse 11, about verse 11. Have a prayer meeting that lasts a half an hour, and most of it is a town meeting talking about different people's ailments or bad knees or backs or something. Now, those types of things are important, but I want you to see something, the passion and the cry of the heart of Jesus Christ was hallowed be thy name. And what does that mean that God's name holiness doesn't primarily mean sinlessness. It means separation. It means uniqueness. It means in a category all to its own that God's name would be esteemed above every other name, that it would be in a totally and completely different category, that it would not be profane or common, but unique, that everyone would hold it that way in an esteem. The greatest esteem above all other things, and that's what he's desire. That was the passion of his heart, that God's name be held as holy and that his kingdom come, that his will be done, that the rule and reign of Christ would advance and overcome and subdue everything that was contrary to it. That was the beat of his heart. That was the passion of his praying that took first place in everything. And the whole thing about daily bread was just give me enough bread so I can participate in the first thing I asked for. Do you see that it's not just give me bread so I can eat, that's not it. It's give me bread so that I can work, live, labor, breathe, pray that your name be hallowed, that your kingdom come and that your will be done. I see so many people who are saying, but, you know, I pray and my needs aren't met. It's like God never answers a prayer. I can look back over the last few years. I can't mention I can't find one thing that specifically I asked for that God actually answered. And I go, well, something's wrong because, see, we think it's just give me this, but it's not it's give me this so that I can do the other. That's the reason for it. It's not for comfort. It's not even for the sake of me. As a matter of fact, when I deal with people who are all caught up in the prosperity movement, I say you're so wrong, you're so wrong. It's blasphemous. I know this is where you need to look at it. This verse nine and 10 will heal you if you'll just look at it. Your attitude will completely change. It's something like this, Lord, if through prospering me economically. And giving me physical health, if by doing that your name will be hollowed in a greater way and your kingdom will come in a greater way and your will will be done in a more profound way through me and the world, then let me prosper and let me be healed. But Lord. If through my calamity and my poverty and my suffering and my turmoil, your name will be hollowed in a greater way, your kingdom will come in a greater way, your will will be done in a more profound manner than Lord, even let me die. Suffering in a prison, starving to death because it's not about food, it's not about wealth, it's not about comfort, I only want your kingdom to come. Now, that's a type of attitude that will lead to prayers being answered. That's what it's about. Now, I also use this as a corrective in the life of men, those who are very lazy and apathetic and those who are very serious about ministry. Now, let me show you, let's take the lazy and apathetic guy first. You know who you are. Let's take you first. You're over there and you're looking at Ephesians five, you're telling your wife you need to submit. Now, wives, that command is there and it's real. Now, it has to be understood properly, but it's there and it's real. It's there. OK, so now it doesn't say whether your husband deserves it or not. But here's what I want you to see, man. Most men in America, most little boys in America and what I'm talking about, I'm talking about a category of men that is like forty five on down when I say little boys. Really, my wife says if a man eating lion gets loose in America, it'll starve to death because there's no men to eat. But we got you don't believe me. Go to the mall. Now you have to wear a blindfold through most of it, but go to the mall and go to the video game shop. Yeah, go there. I did just stand there, look around. Thirty five year old guys in there can't wait till the next video game comes out right now, I want you to think about some things. You're over there and you've learned that your wife ought to submit to you and she looks over there and what does she see? A thirty five year old who still likes running around with his friends. A thirty five year old who still likes running around with his friends who can't wait to get a little extra money so he can buy bigger wheels for his truck. Who has toys, who wants his free time, he's a boy and you are, sir, you're a boy. The thing about, you know, boys toys and men's toys, the only difference is the price. And she looks over there and she goes, I'm called to submit to that, to this guy who works, gets a little extra money, goes out, plays with his friends, wants to have bigger toys and different things, and he's just he's just a boy. So I'm just submit to that now change the scenario. But. That woman looks across and sees a man. And she can look in his eyes, she can hear in his speech, she can see in the way that he lives, that he he breathes his heart beats this Lord, thy name. Be holy, thy kingdom come, thy will be done. And she looks over and sees that. And she goes, if she's converted, she goes, yeah, I submit to a man like that. That won't be that hard now again, I'm not saying you only submit conditionally, but my whole point is this, you shouldn't make it more difficult than it is. Men, we should be men, that doesn't mean we can lift a certain deadlift, a certain amount of weight, that doesn't mean we have a certain kind of physique or that we talk like John Wayne doesn't mean that we fight MMA. It means this, that our heart beats with the same the same passion that our Lord had. His desire was this. That his father's name be hallowed, that his kingdom come and his will be done, and we are called to lay aside childish things, a lot of times the guys in office, you know, the younger guys, they'll go out there, you won't go do lunch, Brother Paul. I said, no. Why? Because my wife is prettier than you are. They said, what do you mean? I said, look, if I work through lunch, I get home quicker. So, no, I don't want to run around with you ugly guys. I want to get home. I want to get home, men, real men, men, they don't have a lot of free time, guys, just recognize it, OK, if you're a man, you go to bed tired, that's your job and you don't have a lot of free time. So the free time you have, you want to spend with your family, you want to pour it into them. Do you understand me? It's what it means to be a man, to put away childish things. It doesn't mean, you know, and here's let me let me share with you something. If I'm if I'm doing what I ought to be doing, if I'm if I'm working hard for my family and if I'm if I'm trying to raise my children in the fear of the Lord and I'm having family devotions and I'm trying to be faithful and I'm working hard and I'm going to bed tired. My wife sees that. And so I don't have to sit there every Saturday and go, can I go hunting? Can I go hunting? Can I go hunting? Because I'm sitting there, I'm working, I'm doing this and every once in a while, my wife will go to me. Here's your bow. Go out and kill something. Have a good time because she knows he's worked hard. She wants to bless. She wants to help. She's she's she's proud, she's glad. Go run around, do whatever you guys do. I come back half frozen. She goes, well, it's just how guys have fun, I guess you see. It is it is living life, so I have to tell men who are apathetic and lazy and have never grown up, look, you're wasting your life. Your heart should beat with one thing. I only desire that his kingdom come. That's it, but now let me go on and use this corrective on another side. I know men who are passionate about this, they're passionate about this, especially I deal with a lot of preachers in Europe and Eurasia and things they've been taught in a way that I believe is wrong and they believe this, that this passage means you give yourself 100 percent to the ministry. It's all about the ministry, the ministry, the ministry. And so day and night they're working in the ministry. They're neglecting their wife. They're neglecting their children. And all they're saying, any time there's a demand from their family or a need from their family, they're like, I'm all about thy kingdom come. Thy will be done. I don't have time for this. And their so-called following of this passion leads to bitterness in the heart of their wife and their children. And they want nothing to do with the kingdom. Let me tell you something that's not right. I hear men say, you know, for the sake of the kingdom, I hear this in so many places, for the sake of the kingdom, you don't have to sacrifice our family. That's a lie. And not only is it a lie, you are lying about God. You know what you're saying? You're saying God's not perfect. That's what you're saying. You say, how am I saying that? In Romans chapter 12, one and two, one of the characteristics of the will of God is what the will of God is perfect. And what does that mean? You do not have to disobey one aspect of the will of God in order to fulfill another aspect of the will of God. So to say I have to neglect the duties and commands of Scripture with regard to my family in order to carry out the duties and commands of Scripture with regard to ministry, you are saying God's will is not perfect. It's contradictory. And that's a lie. That's a lie. And let me share with you something, when I was a single missionary, OK, when I was a single missionary, there were certain passages of Scripture and commands of Scripture that did not touch me. It was though they were dead to me. I'm a single missionary, I have no wife, I have no children, so the commands regarding wife and children, they're dead to me. They have not. So if I want to go, yeah, go out there 18 hours a day, preach the gospel, get martyred, have a good time, go for it so I could go for it. But guess what happened? With the same passion, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done now in God's providence, I've taken a wife. So what does that mean? These commands, they still demand for me, but the time is different now. Why? Because new commands have been brought into my life, commands concerning a wife. And so time has to be wisely allocated to ministry to be obedient here and time has to be wisely allocated here to take care of the commands concerning a wife. But then it's Chato and I and we're running around the northern mountains of Peru. Taking Bibles and doing all sorts of things, and we're free. Why? We have no children. Then we were told by doctors that we couldn't have children. So, OK, that's our life, we're free to do these types of things, to serve the Lord together, to go up and down mountains, to do all kinds of things. And then all of a sudden she's pregnant. And we have a child and then another and another miraculous, we're not supposed to have any. But what happens? Now there's a change with the same passion, time must be taken from this area and wisely allocated to this area because new commands have have come into our life. Do you see that? And so what I want you to see, man, is, you know, the song trust and obey, for there's no other way. You just can't get much wiser or more profound than that. Your job is not to set some goal of ministry. Or to set some some any type of goal like that, your job, your goal should be to simply obey what is written, to obey the commands that apply to you in God's providence. So I like to look at it in this way, concentric circles of concern. First of all, I have commands with regard to my own life. As a man and I can sum those up in this cultivate my relationship with God. And that's primarily through the word and through prayer, cultivate my relationship with God, that is something that must be done. Do you understand that everything else falls apart? There's no possibility for anything else with regard to these commands here. There's no possibility unless I am doing this, as one preacher said, if I don't read the Bible one morning, I know it. If I don't read the Bible two mornings, my wife knows it. If I don't read the Bible for three mornings, everybody knows it. It's the word of God and prayer, the word of God and prayer saturate our minds to cultivate the mind of Christ in the word of God, reading the full counsel from Genesis to Revelation over and over again as many times as you can, saturating your life so that you can people can say of you what they said of Bunyan. If you if you cut him, he would bleed the Bible. So that's the first thing, because I'm no good to anyone unless I'm growing in conformity to Christ. And then the second circle. Would be what, well, what am I bone of bone and flesh of flesh with? It's a wife. That's your second concentric circle, that's your second thing. And this is where oftentimes I think it was it may have been Lou Priolo or whatever, and I was so convicted when I read this, I think it was him and which he took was with godly men who really were godly men. And he said that he makes a line like this and then puts a line down the center, he puts wife here and children here and he gives them the number 10 and he says, divide up the number 10 between your wife and your children. And he found that even among the most godly men, the general rule was. Three to the wife and seven to the children. It's because many of us have married good women, strong women, we know they're converted, we're worried about our children, we're concerned about our children and we invest so much time in our children, which is good. But we don't invest enough time in our wives and in this area, many times I have failed. Because she's just strong, you just expect, OK, she's always going to be there, she's just always going to. Yeah, but that's not right. Our greatest concern should be about the advancement of the kingdom of heaven and our wives, then out from that my children. My children, because if a man doesn't manage his own household well, he can forget about anything in the church, the Puritans would refer to the family actually as a seminary. Because they would say it prepares you for church ministry, why? Well, in the context of church, there's a bride in the context of your family, there's a bride in the context of the church, there's immature children in your family, there's immature children. And if you can't manage your own bride and immature children, how can you manage the bride of Christ and immature children of God that sometimes are found there? You see that so my next circle of concern in doing the will of God is my children. I mean, we do have first Timothy, right? Chapter three requirement of an elder must manage his own household well. And so how do I advance this kingdom? Through cultivating Christ in my own life, through seeking that my wife be conformed to the image of Christ. And this is oftentimes where even godly men most fail because they just happen to be married to many times strong women who. But I failed many times in this area, but I have to teach it because it's true. And then then our families, our families, our children. And yes, it is, it does mean you should have consistent devotions with your family, real ones, not something you just slap together. Now, a lot of my friends, they spend most of their years with their children, catechizing them, and catechisms are very, very good. They've been used by Baptists for for centuries. They're very good. And I've in a roundabout way used that sometimes, but I'm kind of a freakish perfectionist. And so every bit of material that I would always find about how to do children or help me with children, I find flaws in all of it. So I was just miserable. This was when Ian was just a little boy, my oldest, and I was like, you know, I just got this nobody. Maybe I ought to write my own material or this or that. And then one day it dawned on me there's really only one perfect material. It's called the Bible. So what we've done since he was five and now he's 14 and all the other children along with it is we go through books of the Bible. Ian reads like we go through books of the Bible. And but always also in each devotion, it's it's spending time also in the book of Proverbs and in every case in the book of the Bible and in Proverbs, it's a line by line. Ian's the oldest, Ian read verse one. He reads verse one. What does it mean? We talk about it, I do a commentary on it, questions, whatever. OK, Evan, read verse two. He reads verse two. We do the same thing. OK, Rowan, read verse three. She reads verse three. We do it. And we've just worked our way through Proverbs now about I think we're on our fourth or fifth time. But then many books of the New Testament. All the Gospels, the epistles and. It's just the Bible, the Bible, the Bible, saturate their lives in the Bible, you see that. OK, but then it's not just that. Because when we get over to Deuteronomy, chapter six, we see something that I think it was Lou Priolo again brings out very, very wonderfully, it's teaching them in the midst. And what does that mean? If I'm out with my sons putting up a deer stand or we're splitting firewood, there may be all kinds of things that will come up that are opportunities to talk about the Lord, the beauty of nature, the work that we're doing. Man, Dad, I'm sweating. Well, our great, great, great, great grandfather should have never fell. Dad, this is hard work and it just seemed we did all this and now it amounted to nothing. Yeah, that's called toil. Our dad, look, we really accomplished a lot today. Yeah. Who gave us the grace to do it? It's it's not that you one of the things that we've done horribly, we've done this in medical science, we've done this in science, we've done this in business, education and family and everything. And in spirituality compartmentalized everything. OK, we had our little devotion time. OK, let's put Jesus back in the closet and I'll just go on with life, you see. And that's not the way it is. It's in everything, in everything. And that doesn't mean everything's a lecture. It just means that if the father. Is is there's a song that I used to sing from Keith Green that I would sing to my children when they were little, and it goes like this, oh, my son, I am weak and I'm trembling for the Lord. I am always remembering, oh, what a strong shepherd holds you in his arms. He'll break you and make you his own. And they need to have a father and a mother. They can say, oh, my son or my daughter, I am weak and I'm trembling for the Lord, I am always remembering. That there's just no part of life where he's not we love to kayak, we have a really beautiful river that we kayak on and and the Lord's not absent from that. It's in everything. That there should be a sense of the Lord and you can't make that happen, guys, you can't fake it, you can't just turn on a faucet and say, OK, I heard that sermon, I'm going to do it. That only comes from your personal life, cultivating a mind of Christ, cultivating the Lord. The thoughts of the Lord, a mindset and incline towards the Lord, you see that. And so it's the family and then in that also there is the church. The church, the local church, there is a sense in which the Internet is something like the Gutenberg press, I mean, it has enabled so much information, good information, a lot of times not just bad, but good information, good teaching to get out and even close countries and everything. But there's another sense in which the Internet has been very, very bad. People almost ignore the local church. Look, you can't do that. Remember an old preacher one time walked up to this lady, walked up to him and said, Pastor, I wanted they had a choir or whatever. Pastor, I want to sing in the choir. And he goes, were you a member of this church? And she said, no, I'm a member of the Great Invisible Church. He said, then you go sing in the Great Invisible Choir. The whole point is that they're that God's people, a local body of believers. To whom you're accountable. And to elders who can speak into your life and counsel you, a place where you can even lovingly be disciplined for the salvation of your soul. And then as a collective body thinking about not so much independently, everyone just doing their own thing in world missions, but collectively as a body thinking about how can we have the greatest impact as a body here in Cincinnati on the world, not just on our community, but also upon the world. And that's how these circles work themselves out. Dropping that pebble. What is that? You're dropping that pedal that you're holding. That is when a man spends time alone with God in the word and then it reaches out to his wife, to his children, to his church and to the world. And nobody's bitter now. Because you haven't jumped over your family or jumped over your pastors in church to get to some other thing. Do you see that? Now, minutes, it's very simple, isn't it? It's a lot more simple. It's not really a mystery of what we need to be doing. Give me a man who does the small things, the simple hidden things. I'll take him over the greatest superstar you ever met. Now, I want us to go quickly with just the time that we have. I want us to go over to see we've got so much. Well, let's just go to to Second Timothy, chapter three. I want to talk about children for a moment. Now, I'm going to entitle this portion of our sermon, get ready, why you should never discipline your children. OK, I made some of you ready to kill me, shoot those poison darts out with your eyes. Children are like for the first time in their life, the Lord is speaking, let's be quiet. I could also I preach a similar sermon, why why the church should never practice church discipline. OK, but this is why should parents never discipline their children? OK, why some parents, let me put it that way, should never discipline their children. I want us to go to verse 15. He's talking about the scriptures and he says, and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith, which is in Christ Jesus. All scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training and righteousness, so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work. Now, there is nothing hardly that makes me madder, angrier than this. A father who's invested no time in his daughter. And then when she even though I'm not I don't agree with this, I'm just going to say it because it's what happens in a lot of cases, he's invested no time in his daughter. Then when she's 16, she goes out on a date with somebody he doesn't even know. And to show his manhood and fatherhood, he cleans a gun in the front room when the boy comes in. He ought to be beat with that gun. That's that's not manly, that's not anything, it's just stupid. Yes, I know your children are going to go home and say, Dad, I thought we couldn't use the word stupid. It's wrong. He's invested no time in this girl and now he wants to make a show. He wants to like a Neanderthal beat his chest or something, but he's invested no time in this girl. And that's why some parents should some so-called Christian parents should never discipline their children in any way because they haven't done the work that must precede discipline. And it's why some churches should never practice church discipline, because they think church discipline is just simply you discipline them because they've done something and won't repent. But the church hasn't invested all the other work they're required to do as a church. I see parents today, you know, because of because of a lack of teaching and a lack of discipline and everything else, they don't they don't teach their children. They don't discipline their children in the name of love. And then they come to hate their children. I can tell I've seen them at Walden screaming at their children. They hate them. Can't be with him, can't do anything. They're prisoners to those children. And here's some things that even though, you know, it's like. We need 10 hours of preaching, but let's just look at this really quick. Look at verse 16, well, first 15. Look, I believe in the sovereign grace of God, it's taught throughout all the scriptures, and I know my children's only hope ultimately is God. And yet I know that as a father, I am that God uses means for the conversion of people, and I know that God has commanded me to be obedient. And I know the best thing that I can do for my children is just copious amounts of scripture. The scriptures, the scriptures, the scriptures, and listen, there are parents here who could stand up right now and give testimony to this that have had children and their children are already out of the home. You're sitting there and you're teaching your children for years. The scriptures faithfully, consistently, and you're thinking this is having no impact whatsoever on those children. And one day, surprise, surprise, surprise. You see that the scriptures really didn't return void, that God did amazing things through that scripture. You see, everything that we do is an act of faith. Obedience is primarily an act of faith. You're believing that what God says is true and you're believing it to such a degree you're going to do it. Preaching is an act of faith. Paul says it's the most foolish, pitiful thing that's out there. And yet by faith, we do it because God has said that through preaching, people will be saved and the church will be edified. And so we preach meeting with children several times a week, teaching them the scriptures. And sometimes you think they're not learning anything. You do it by faith. You just keep going, you keep believing and God will use the scriptures. And so this is something that is so important, it is the scripture, the scripture, the scripture proclaimed and proclaimed and proclaimed, not just preaching in the church, preaching in the home. Preaching in the home. But father's also asking God to help you communicate the truth so it's not turned into just some. Drab lecture and you do not have to be exceptionally gifted, this is what I have found that if a man is passionate about something, he will be able to communicate it if he's passionate about something. I mean, I've talked to men and you think, man, is this guy ever even read a book and then all of a sudden you hit the thing he's passionate about, whether it's fishing or hunting or cars or something up until then, you wondered, you know, is this guy even is he registering, you know, at all? And then all of a sudden you hit that thing he's passionate about. Well, he's an expert. He can tell you everything there is to tell you about fifty seven Chevys. He can get everything you need to know about the proper way to shoot a bow because he's passionate about it. You say, well, I can't really, you know, I can't teach my family. I don't have. No, your problem is a lack of passion for Jesus Christ, because if you really passionate about him. When you first met your wife, man, you could tell everybody anything because you were passionate about that. Do you see that? So don't be coming off with any excuse. And I always tell men this. They'll say, well, I just don't understand. And after, you know, say, well, first of all, if you don't understand anything about the scriptures, the question is, are you even converted? Then secondly, if you are converted, let me ask you a question, if your factory came to you, your factory foreman came to you and says, look, here's a here's a manual about this big and I know you don't understand anything in it, but if you learn this manual in the next month. We'll double your salary here, you'll learn that manual, you'll stay up all night, you'll your wife be pumping coffee to you, you just be and she'll be right there with you, honey, learn, you can do it, you can do it, you can do this. What about the Bible? Because your whole family depends on that and for eternity, for eternity, and why is I mean, let me share with you something, I've got a whole lecture on this, but let me share it with you. Your husband will fail you many times. And if I could pinpoint one thing about husbands, is that. Maybe. Apathy, lack of. Sincerity or profound passion about something. Laziness, boyishness. Are all things men are inclined to because of the way they're raised primarily by their mothers. Let me share with you something, one of the thing about women. It's bitterness. And they get to the point where they never give the husband a chance that everything he tries to do, even when he tries, it's basically you're going to fail. Well, I knew you'd fail. I knew you'd start reading the Bible and wouldn't, you know, if you heard him preach, I knew you'd try it again. You'd fail again. Boy, aren't you a wonderful blessing? You know what I was listening to Joel Osteen last year, I was I listened to a whole sermon somewhere that they had a TV and he came on, I listened to him and I was so convicted. But you didn't expect that, did you? You know, I was convicted about. About everything, because of the context, about everything he said was wrong, almost everything he said was wrong. It's like hitting a home run, but you're at a hockey game. That's basically the way it was. But here's what I was convicted about. He was encouraging people about all the wrong things, but he was encouraging people. And I thought, how little we teach that in the more serious circles, the sovereign grace circles and the reformed circles about just encouraging people saying, look, in Christ, you can. I'm praying for you and I believe that God's going to do something and I have great hope for you. And to see your husband and he failed, he got his Bible and he ended up reading five minutes, you see him close it and he's kind of just frustrated. Instead of going, yeah, well, I didn't think that last long or you broke my heart again. Walking over and say, I really appreciate. I appreciate. The attempt. And I'm proud of you and I just want. You want to sit down and read together is I'm proud of you. It's the same way with your we just don't encourage one another. We just don't we just don't enough. Do you see that? I encourage kid comes and says, dad or mom, I'm sorry. You're not sorry. You've done this a hundred times today. You hypocrite, you stinking hypocrite. What did your master say? Seventy times seven. What if you went to him? How many times some of you are like me, you've walked with him for 10, 15, 20, 30 years. How many countless times have you committed the same error, same sin and gone to him joyfully expecting forgiveness? When did you once hear him say, we talk about you'll be back here in five minutes. We need to be careful, so careful we need to be encouraging, because let me ask you a question. Let's just let's throw theology out the window and let's just be pragmatic for a moment in all your discouragement and criticism. Did any of it work? Did any of it make your marriage better? Did any of it make your children better? Did any of your anger, your retaliation, your frustration, your impatience, everything else, did it ever one time fix anything? No. So let's just throw theology out the door and be pragmatic, like most of evangelicalism. And even then we see the scriptures right, don't we? It never works. But what worked the times that something actually worked, what happened? You acted like Jesus instead of acting like you. Oh, it's been rare. But when you did it, it had a profound effect. Oh, especially just men, you take for granted so much and so sloppy and lazy a lot of times and so nonchalant about things that mean so much to your wife. And you and I ought to be ashamed. And wives, you need to be careful about bitterness because it'll crawl up on your face and stay there and everyone can read at the moment they see you. Now you understand why I preach in a lot of places once teaching the scriptures. Now, let's look at this. It says in verse 16. All scriptures inspired by God and profitable for teaching, reproof, correction and training and righteousness. Why do we think this only has to do with preaching? Well, come to think of it, I don't think we even think it has anything to do with preaching because I don't see many people doing this either in preaching. But if you would look at this with regard to your children, someone gets mad at their children and they're angry at their children or someone, even their child does something wrong and they discipline them. The first question they need to ask themselves, am I teaching my children? You know, I look back on my life and I've talked to a lot of young men, a lot of old men and realized that the only time I received any moral instruction was not really a moral instruction, but it occurred the moment I had done something wrong. And I would hear something like, you stupid, why did you do that? You know, that's wrong. You have no right to discipline if you are not going to teach. You have what you want. You have this right to just expect stuff from your children, but you've not invested anything in your children. You don't invest anything, don't expect anything. Are you expecting someone else to do it? Like a schoolteacher or just mom, because she homeschools a lot of times, I love it. I'll go into a place, a men's conference, I go, how many men are homeschooled dads? Her I'm homeschooled and I go, OK, keep your hand up now. How many of you are homeschooled dads or how many of you are just married to homeschool moms? You see the hand go down, they're not homeschooling, they're just married to homes, to women who do all the homeschooling. That's not a homeschooled dad, you see that. Amen. OK, so make sure you're all there. You see, you have to teach your children. Now, here's the thing about authority. Why should we do that, dad? Because I said so. That's not true. Say it all you want, beat your chest if you want, but that's not true. If I, as a preacher, got up and told you something in the congregation said, why do I have to do that? If I said because I say so, would that carry much weight with you? I hope it wouldn't. I'd hope you'd say show it to me in the text. You see, authority in my home doesn't originate with me. I have authority in my home. I am to be the head of my home, but my authority is in is derived. It's not inherent and it's only authority to the degree that it lines up with a greater authority. So in the way of preaching, in some ways, preaching is not like this. You are looking at me and me telling you what to do. Preaching is me standing like this going. Did you hear what he just told us? Do you see the difference? It's one of the reasons why sometimes I have gotten down on my knees and asked for forgiveness from one of my children. Why? Because I disobeyed a command. So they need to know dad is not imposing his authority. Dad is speaking an authority to which he must submit. God, God is the authority in this home. Dad is communicating that authority to us and dad, just like us, no difference. Dad must also submit to that authority. And when dad blows it, dad asks forgiveness, just like we do. Do you see that? And so how can they know if you don't teach them? And so, fathers, listen to me, I beg you. This is not about a higher salary. This is not about keeping your job. This is about eternity. Your job is to know the scriptures. I don't understand him. I don't care. Do whatever you have to do to know the scriptures. Because your life depends on it, your wife's life depends on it, your children's life depends on it. Know the scriptures or don't get married, know them. And the Lord knows how many good sermons are out there, how many decent study bibles that keep you at least in the midst of the center of Christian orthodoxy, how many commentaries, how many things, how many helps there are getting to a biblical church pastors, the light when people come up and say, I don't know what this text means. Can you tell me? Only have a chair with you because he's probably going to preach for 10 hours. They love this. They're just waiting for someone to ask them, like the girl waiting for someone to ask her for a dance or something. There's no excuse. You say it's hard. Yes, it's hard. You know, one of the greatest things I learned and this is what really gets people. And yes, I know I'm running a rabbit, but listen to me. You need to hear this. Many people think that the people who really read and study the Bible do so because it's easy for them because they're gifted. Many people think that the people who pray, they pray simply because it's easy for them. They're gifted to do that. That's a lie. It's a lie. Most people I know, I've asked them that study the word and are great teachers of the word, it's hard for them, just like it is for the rest of us. They have to get up in the morning early and their flesh doesn't want to, but they know it's absolutely necessary. They know it's absolutely necessary to pray. And another thing, you get a guy who's in a biker gang. Who didn't even learn hardly how to read in high school, he's in a biker gang. I mean, he is bad to the bone. He's got a messed up family. He can barely read. He gets saved one afternoon and the next morning he calls his family down to the table and he tries to read a chapter in Matthew six and he can barely get through it that even the children would laugh at his inability to read. I want to tell you something. The fact that he did that will have such a tremendous impact on his family, whether he can read it or explain it. They know something's happened to dad. Do you see that? So you must teach them the scriptures. What does God demand of us? What are the principles? What are the commands? Why? What is the wisdom behind it? Yes, a child can ask the question why and it'd be rebellious, but it's not necessarily rebellious. It's good to know why. Proverbs is full of do this and this is the reason why. And so you must teach your children the scriptures and then what you must reprove your children. What does that word mean? It's just like a prosecuting attorney. You know, you're wrong, but a prosecuting attorney, you know, when you hear somebody say, I feel convicted of my sin, that's not biblical language. It's not I feel convicted. It's all about feeling. Now, here's what the idea is. You have a man on the stand who's been accused of a crime. The prosecuting attorney, it doesn't matter what he feels like, does it? That man who's sitting there in the chair, the prosecuting attorney walks in and he just doesn't say you're guilty, does he? He says you're guilty. Here's the first piece of evidence, second piece of evidence, third piece of evidence, fourth piece of evidence until everybody in that room doesn't matter what they feel. They all know he's guilty. He's guilty. That's what the word means here. It's like when my mother was dying of cancer. Our doctor knew she's a very stubborn woman. He walked in there loaded for loaded for bear. I'm not kidding. He walked in there with a stack of papers. Miss Washer, if you don't do this, you're going to die. And here's the reason. One, two, three. One hundred and thirty eight hundred thirty nine. Until she just sat there and went, well, you know, OK. And that's the same way we use the scripture, you tell your children, you tell your child you're wrong. You use the scriptures to show them they're wrong, and primarily it's the example of Jesus. Because he is the standard of all righteousness, but it's using the scriptures to show them when they're wrong. And then after that, you see, it says for reproof and then for correction. You tell your child you're wrong. Well, that's not good enough. After you tell them they're wrong and they've been brought to some sort of repentance, you tell them correction. Correction isn't telling them you're wrong again. Correction is telling them, OK, reproof, you did it wrong. Correction. This is how you do it. Reproof, you do not hit your brother in the mouth with a John Deere tractor toy. And this is what the scripture says, correction, blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. Do you say you use the scriptures? It's not just telling your child you're wrong. You show them that they're wrong with the scriptures and then you show them what they're supposed to do, how they were supposed to handle it. And then there's training. Training long before ever there's discipline, there's training. Now, what does it mean training? Let me give you an example. Sometimes guys will ask me like shooting a long bow, like a traditional just a stick, you know, bow and arrow. They go, man, I've started doing this. This is really hard. Could I come over and you show me how to shoot a bow? And I say, yes. But before I do, I want you to read this book. Becoming the Arrow by Byron Ferguson. Read this book. They read the book, everything they need to know about how to shoot a long bow. He's one of the best. It's in that book. But when they come to my house, they still can't shoot a long bow. They've been taught, but they haven't been trained. There's a big difference. So I say, OK, grab your bow. They grab their bow and I look at their feet. I go, look at your feet. Don't you remember what he said about the feet, get the feet this way, your weight distribution, how is it? Oh, OK, so that's what yeah, that's what he meant. Now, your feet's right now. Let me see you grab your bow, you're grabbing your bow too tight. Remember, if you grab it too tight, you're going to torque it. Let it hang in your hand just enough to hold it up. OK, let me see you pull back. Now, remember your arrow, your elbow, everything. Why do you got one eye closed? You don't shoot a gun or a bow with one eye closed. You have both eyes open. And you see and then they do it and they do it again and they do it again and they do it again and I'm correcting and I'm correcting and I'm correcting and I'm applauding and I'm teaching and I'm moving their hand. Now, let me give an example from my oldest son, Ian. He hates this example, but it's a really good one. We were in this this house and had woods and everything, we just moved there. It's woods. He's all excited. His little brother's all excited. They're out there, you know, hunting grizzly bears and stuff. And so they're just all wild with excitement. So I'm sitting there on the couch and I'm preparing for a message. I got my Bible there and everything. And all of a sudden, Ian runs in the door like some wild Banshee, slams it, runs to his room. And I keep studying, runs out of his room, runs out the door, slams the door again. So I'm mad. OK, so my Bible get up, go over the door. But while I'm walking across there, I realized something, this text training. Now, was there rebellion in that boy's eyes? Did that boy come in there and say, Dad said, don't slam the door, but I'm going to slam it. Now, that's not what happened. There wasn't rebellion. What was it? It was a wild six year old hunting grizzlies. That's what was going on. But one that needs to be trained just because he's young and just because he's full of excitement, that doesn't mean that behavior is thrown out the window. He needs to know how to control that excitement. So I go out there and instead of getting mad like, what are you doing? I don't you know, you live in a barn or something. You go out and go, Ian, come here. Yeah, you slam the door. Oh, I'm sorry. OK, don't slam the door. You don't want to slam the door. Other people are doing other things in the house and you need to think about it. OK, I sit down five minutes later. Ian runs in, slams the door. Now, again, it wasn't I hate my dad and I'm slamming doors, but it was he gets halfway across. Ian, what did you do? I don't know. You slammed the door. Oh, OK, but see, that's not good enough. What you got to do now is take time, put the Bible up, come over here to the door. OK, open the door, open it, close the door without making a sound. OK, now I want you to open the door, go out, close the door, open the door. Come in, close the door four times. OK, it's like this goes out. It's fine. Go back. This really happened. So I go back and I sit there and I got my Bible and. I don't know how many minutes passed and all of a sudden the door opens up, Ian flies in. Wham. But the moment he went, wham, he goes, oh, it's like he's been hit, you know, abducted by an alien or something. He just is. And I go, what? You are. I said, all right, go back to the door back before. Now he can be running at 100 miles an hour with an actual grizzly bear behind him. But when he comes to that door, all of a sudden he goes in slow motion. All right, now here's the whole point. He wasn't rebelling. He needed to be trained. And men, this takes time. Guess what? You don't want to give time, don't have children. I could say not only why some men shouldn't discipline their children, why some men shouldn't have children and even take it farther, why some men shouldn't get married. Really, really. It takes time. And time is a great killer with regard to discipline. It's just like you're in Wal-Mart. This happened with Ian, too. It's in Wal-Mart. And somehow, I don't know, even when they're like four, they figure out we're in a public place and there's cameras. I'm safe. And so it's OK, the baskets pretty much full. He's not being obedient. It's pick him up, leave the basket, the groceries, everything, go out to the car or even go all the way home if necessary, take care of this matter and then come back and shop again. Yeah, it takes a long time. So it's it's training. Now, let me share something with you. You start this when they're little. By the time they're six years old, if you have not been working at this enduringly and longly, you will have trouble on your hands. Child's character is formed by the time it's six or seven years old. That's why in Europe now they want the public schools, they want the children there by the age of three, because they know if they get them there by the age of six, it's too late in our in our church. And I'm just saying this, I'm not an elder there, so I can I guess I can talk good about my church without being proud. But I mean, it's we don't and I'm not saying it's wrong to have Sunday school, but we just don't have Sunday school, the children sit in that congregation and when they're little, they sit there in that congregation and they learn how to sit, because if they don't learn how to sit, then you take them home and you train them how to sit. You get a little bench and you sit them on it and you teach them how to be still and you teach them how to do these things. And you teach that child that when you say come, they come and they don't even ask a question. You see, there's so much to be taught here and we don't have time. But the whole thing is, is that you cannot convert your children. And you should not be trying to bully your children into some mold, but I want to tell you something, if you will teach and you will reprove and you will correct and you will train and you discipline consistently and biblically. Then you won't have children, at least you'll have a family that is managed well and under control. It's pitiful, I go to some places, I go to churches and I see 40 year old men. They're like this, the child's disobeying like crazy, but they know I've only got one option, I've got to do, I've got to get out of here, because if I try to correct this child, if I try to say, give me my watch back or be quiet, they will go crazy and create a scandal. And so you've got parents who are literally subjugated under these little terrorists. It's pathetic. Sick. Are begging a child, please come, please come, please reduce to nothing. Men. And I'm not talking about bullying or beating or anything like that, what I'm talking about is discipline so that that child knows when it's four years old, be quiet and that's it, that's it. Do not get up, get up, all those are possibilities, but it takes time. If one thing now there's some bigger guys in here, you can probably whip me, but I can tell you this, both of us will be leaving in an ambulance. OK, I want to tell you something. Don't ever talk to me about quality time because I'm just liable to rear back and hit you. Quality, I don't spend much time with my children, just quality time baloney. I don't believe it. I don't believe it because I know in my own relationship with the Lord, it's not like every time I bow my knee to pray or have my devotional time that it's like in the year that King Uzziah died, you know, the Lord comes down into my room. But out of a copious amount of time with the Lord, there are these quality times that appear these special times. It's the same way with children. It's not you can orchestrate quality time, it's through a copious amount of time with your children that some quality times happen. And guys, you're just going to have to do this. Wives, you're going to have to do this and you're going to have. Listen, you've got to get for the sake of your children. You've got to do this. You can't allow just rebellion and disobedience and you can't start on this when they're 14. You start this from the very beginning. But you don't just bully them either. What you're doing is you're also winning their heart. Give you my give me your heart, my son, spending time with them, loving them, serving them when you blow it, asking for forgiveness. It's working with them. It's creating a life and a relationship with them so that your greatest concern is that they're going to do things just because they want to honor and please their dad. And it's not really from the heart. That'll be your greatest concern. Please, you must do this. It's just an investment of time. It's an investment of time. There's so much I would like to say to close, but let me say a few other things. Over the last twenty five, thirty years of homeschooling, it's been serious. And it's going to sound a little comical, maybe it'll sound a little harsh, but I'm just going to be true about it. I want you to remember this. I was raised in public school. You say, well, I figured I was raised in public school. Where you you knew if you went to the bathroom, you were going to get in a fight. Someone's going to bushwhack you in that bathroom. You got tough. You got to where there was a toughness about you, and I don't mean that necessarily in a bad way. Fathers, listen to me over the last couple of decades, and I've heard I've heard girls talk about this homeschool girls calling the homeschool boys jelly beans. There's nothing about them. They've been raised by their moms. There's not a toughness there. Oh, they may read, you know, books about great adventures. But there's little strength to them. There's no scars on them. Now, I'm totally against public school. I'll tell you that right now. But let me tell you something, men, if you're going to homeschool your children, you better get involved and you better find a way to not just have those boys learn, you know, read hentai stories or something or read about great adventures or look in some catalog and, you know, find something the coonskin cap or something. You need to do something with those boys. Now, if you don't live on a 40 acre farm in Kansas. You're going to have to figure out ways. I do things with my boys to make them tough. I lift weights with them, I do it and I make them hurt. They split wood, they do whatever they have to do. Because there's got to be some toughness to them, there's got to be some calluses on their hands, it's got to be put in and if they're not going to be getting in fights in public school, then they're putting on gloves with dad and fight a lot better than those high school boys. There's got to be some toughness there. You've got to do something. We can't just raise boys who know how to do calligraphy. We need to instill toughness also in these boys. Another thing, dads, know this, your daughter needs you just as much as your son, if not more. She needs you. She needs you and she needs you to do stuff with her. Another thing, I was teaching down in Louisiana a long time ago and I saw homeschool family come in. I always say that I am one. So I guess birds of a feather recognize one another. They walked in, but I could really see, I mean, it was the dad first, the mom, the oldest son, the youngest son, the oldest daughter, the youngest daughter. I mean, they were perfect, man, like 30 of them walk in. And and I am I'm all for big families, just sometimes we got to laugh at ourselves. And I was preaching about the time Ian was four years old and we hooked into this snapping turtle. I mean, the thing looked like the Loch Ness Monster. It was big and he's he can't get it up. He's four years old. He's slipping around in the mud and everything. And he said, Daddy, get him, get him. So I waited out there and I get about up to my waist. I'm thinking, you know, I'm not a 20 year old anymore. This thing's going to sling its head around and nail me. So I tried to grab it, couldn't grab it, came back out, got a log or we're pulling this thing up. I'm telling this story in this church about me and my oldest son wrestling this Godzilla of a snapping turtle. And when I got done, the oldest boy of that big family. I saw him walk toward me, but then I got a little spook because he walked toward me and he made sure that his back was to his dad a bit. I thought, oh, I need to be careful here, which he's going to tell me something. And all of a sudden, just tears started coming down his face. He goes, Mr. Washer, let me ask you a question. I said, yeah, he goes, did you really do that? I said, yeah, I really did it with with Ian. I said, yeah, I really did that with Ian. And it was just you and him alone. You did that. I said, yeah. And he just goes like this. I never did anything like that with my dad. I've never been alone one time with my dad. And I thought, you know. I can tell I've been really sanctified because I didn't whip that guy that day, but I want to tell you something, it's like, OK, you've got this huge family and you've got all this stuff, but are you doing things right? Are you doing things right? Another thing I want you to know, all these a lot, there's a lot of good homeschool teachers out there and everything, but I also I'm a little bit fed up with the idea of these guys that, you know, they have these huge families, they do all these wonderful things, but they're teaching all these homeschool conferences. They're pulling down some really big bucks and they can do a lot of these things with their family. But most of us, most of you, you're sitting out there, you're working day and night to put food on the table, trying to meet some standard that they're able to meet because they're making a whole lot more money than you are. And being being a true Christian is not about being a homeschool family on a 40 acre farm because most of us can't afford three acres. And what you've got to do is you've got to look at where you live and say, how can I pour as much of my life as possible and much of the gospel as possible into my wife and my children and then realize, like everything on this side of the planet, there's some holes in homeschooling, there's some holes in all this subculture that's being created and we need to just be careful that we just need to be biblical. I know, you know, it sounds like bad some of the things I've said the last two days, but I want you to know something. We just need to get back to the scriptures and we need to realize that the only solution is God and the gospel. And we need to honestly look at our children and say, am I spending time with them? Am I doing things? Dads, you really got to look at something. I know it's hard to work and I know what it's like to be tired. But that's just what we do. We're men, we go to bed tired, you get done with that work, you haven't finished your work. There's a family now, you take care of them, you do things with them. Another thing. And again, I'm just throwing things out. It doesn't matter how godly my wife is. It doesn't matter how joyful she is or isn't. I'm the one that's going to set the mood of the family when I walk through that door. It's the way, you know, men always talk about, you know, I'm the head of the family. You need to realize being the head of the family brings some horrific responsibilities that my wife, her personality is not going to set the mood for our home. I am. If I come in from the office beat, dead, tired, depressed, whatever, it's going to be like darkness entered into that home. And I can say it because I've done it right. I've done it wrong. You talk about being the head of the family. You are the head of the family and the way you are in that family. Is going to determine how that family is. I heard one man say this and I hardly agree with him, he said, in all the years of studying homeschoolers and family, he says, I've only found one common denominator. Joy, joy. That the houses were filled with joy. Isn't it amazing the fruit of the spirit is righteousness, holiness, separation. That's not what it says, is it? The fruit of the spirit is love. Joy, you think Paul got that wrong? Wouldn't we have put something else there? He didn't get it wrong, word of God's inspired love, joy, joy. Joy. Which means you ought to have family devotions and sometimes you ought to grab your wife in the kitchen, do a jig all the way out into the living room with all the kids laughing their head off. I'm not kidding, guys. It's life. It's life. Lastly, I'm going to sound like those ladies who are talking about healthy food. And eat right and take care of yourself so that you can work harder so you have more energy and more strength to pour into the will of God. A lot of people can't do what they need to do because they're so unhealthy. They don't eat right and take care of themselves. It's like the cartoon where a guy's sitting there on the doctor's examination table and the doctor says, you need to exercise. The guy goes, I don't have time to exercise. And the doctor says, do you have time to die? Say, well, the Apostle Paul didn't exercise. Nobody swam in an ocean and walked about 24 miles a day. You must, in order to put in the amount of time that you need to put in, you must take care of yourself so that you can pour out more of yourself to God, to your wife, to your children, to your church, to the world. Let's pray. Father, thank you. And Lord, this. This mess of stuff, Lord, this variation of things that I've said, all disconnected, I pray, Lord, that you would take it and use it in the hearts of people. That we would be men of grace, women of grace, that our children would be raised in both the fear and the joy of the Lord, that we would be servants, Lord, in the manifestation of your church, Lord, that we'd stand before you on that day and hear, well done, my good and faithful servant, enter into the joy of your master. Help us, Lord, in Jesus name, Amen.