In this sermon, the preacher discusses the topic of spiritual suicide and how it can lead to physical suicide. He uses the story of Saul from the book of 1 Samuel as an example. Saul was a handsome and gifted man who was anointed to be king of Israel. However, he squandered this opportunity and took steps towards spiritual suicide. The preacher outlines ten steps that Saul took, starting with unrepentant sin.

...message that I believe is going to save our lives. As I looked over this message, and I think in my entire ministry I've only preached this message twice, Preacher. Only twice. And I felt a deep impression yesterday, and last night, and this morning it was heavy. And I'm going to ask you to turn with me to 1 Samuel chapter 31, verses 3 and 4. But we will be looking at other portions of Scripture in 1 Samuel. I want you to listen to the title of this message. How to Commit Spiritual Suicide. How to Commit Spiritual Suicide. Or, if you want to take it further, how you can end up committing physical suicide. Because I've noticed this, people who commit spiritual suicide, in many cases, their lives are shortened, or they end up taking their own life through devastating acts of rebellion. And here we have the life of a man called Saul, who had so much going for him. And this is right at the end of his life. It says in verse number 3 of chapter 31 of 1 Samuel, The battle went sore against Saul, and the archers hid him, and he was sore wounded, or badly wounded, of the archers. Then said Saul unto his armor-bearer, Draw thy sword, and thrust me through therewith, lest these uncircumcised come, and thrust me through, and abuse me, or torture me. But his armor-bearer would not, for he was sore afraid. Therefore Saul took a sword, and fell upon it. He took his own life. I want us to bow together in prayer this morning, and I want us to ask God to show us. If we're taking any of these steps, you might be at step 1, you might be at step 2, you might even be at step 4. You know what the sad commentary is? Anywhere along these steps, most people don't know where they're at, unless God shows them. Would you and I be open, if there's any level of ground we've given to the enemy, that we'd be able to deal with? I certainly would hate, somewhere along the line, to hear a report that somebody's bailed out completely in Christianity. And all you had to do is take one step, friend, and it's just like this. That's all you had to take. You give the devil this much, and that's all it takes, and you're gone. So this is a very serious, I hope it's preventative medicine, amen? That nobody here will be out of the will of God. And let's pray together. Lord, without You we can do nothing, and we commit this time to You. We pray that Thy Spirit would anoint and open our eyes to any unrealized ground. May, Lord, it be a deep spirit of conviction. But, Lord, also the gift of repentance. May we see people saved from spiritual suicide. In Jesus' name we pray, with thanksgiving, amen. You know, one of the most tragic things, I guess, you and I could see in life, is to read in the paper that someone we knew took their life. Somebody who tragically ended their life at an early age. You often hear of teenagers who have gotten depressed and disillusioned by life, listening or getting involved in the occult or rock music, putting a hose in their car, cranking up the car, writing suicide letters, and suddenly ending their life at an early age. We've seen these tragedies, and they bring great distress and grief to our souls. And life certainly has enough pressures to want to send us under, amen? The vices of life, the stress of life, the situations of life. Life is a gift from God, and when Jesus saved us, He said, I've come that you might have life, and you might have life more abundantly. But He said, the thief has come to steal and to kill and to destroy. And if I know anything about the devil today, the devil would love to take each of us individually. And everything that God's done in our life, I totally negate as we make unmerited and unwarranted steps towards spiritual suicide. And I guess if you've been in Christianity long enough, and many of you have been in there longer than me, but I have seen on occasions people at one time were flaming candles or lights in the kingdom of God, suddenly because of sin or other things I'll mention, their spiritual life was snuffed out. And now, when you talk to them about Jesus, you talk about being on fire for God, their hearts become cold and calloused. They become very cynical and skeptical about Christianity, and they suddenly have found themselves on the heap of rejections in the kingdom of God. I trust that won't be so this morning. As I look at the life of Saul, Saul was a handsome man. He was taller than anybody in his kingdom. Now, he may have been right around 6'8 or 6'9, but he was a large, tall, handsome man, very gifted, and he was anointed to be king of Israel. And the Bible says that God gave him a new heart, gave him an anointing, gave him an opportunity to have an influence over a whole nation. Now, wouldn't that be a wonderful opportunity? Because of God's calling and God's anointing, you have the ability to influence thousands and millions of people. Wouldn't that be a great opportunity? But that man squandered that great opportunity. And if I had another title for this message, you want it to be, I did it my way. I did it my way. There are ten steps that Saul took this morning, and that we can take to commit spiritual suicide. Number one, he was guilty of unrepentant sin. He was guilty of unrepentant sin. And there are two levels he committed unrepentant sin. Number one, he worshipped his own way. You see, one day Samuel went off, and Samuel said, I'll be back in seven days. And the people were afraid, following this fellow far off. And under the pressure of peer pressure, he usurped the priestly rover office, and he brought sacrifices before God when God had not anointed him to do that. And he worshipped his own way. You know, folks, there are people in this building today, possibly, that have decided to worship God their own way. You know, there's only one way to worship God. Can somebody tell me the right way to worship God? Spirit. So you had to be full of Spirit, and in what? Truth. You had to be obeying the truth. If you're here for any other reason, then in the Spirit of God to worship Him, and in your heart to obey His truth, you are worshipping God your own way. How do people worship? By saying, by coming to church, I worship. By reading my Bible, I worship. By giving money, I worship. And see, Saul took upon himself to do things his own way and worship. But he took upon himself to work for God his own way. See, in chapter 15, the Word of God came to Saul, and he said, I want you to kill the Amalekites. I don't want you to spare things. I want you to kill the king, I want you to kill the animals, and this is my commandment. And what did Saul did? Saul went out and he spared Agagath the king and the best of the rams and the fatlings and the sheep, and he killed them. He had partial obedience. He did more than most people did, but he didn't carry it out to the fullest. And so when the man of God came by and said, How are you doing, Saul? Do you know what Saul said? Blessed be thou, the Lord. I have performed the commandments of God. I'm doing the will of God. And old Samuel said, What's the bleeding of these sheep and the loathing of these rams? Why have you saved this crowd? Didn't God tell you not to do that? And you know what Saul said? The people made me do it. You know, whenever somebody is confronted with unrepentant sin, the first thing they're going to do is try to blame somebody else for their disobedience. He said, The people made me do it. He said, I've obeyed the voice of the Lord. He said, I've given a sacrifice to God. Look here, I'll even use these sheep. I've saved these sheep for sacrifice to God. He saved what God said was ugly and should have destroyed as what He offered to God. You know when people commit sin, they offer an unyielded life and say, God, I'm going to do it exactly the way I want to and don't you tell me how far I can go. Why did he do this? He had a defective concept of God. He thought God was impressed with his works. He had a defective commitment. He had defective character. Do you know of people who have made up their minds they couldn't go so far? Folks, can I tell you this? Anything less than total sacrifice is sin. Amen? Oh, you can pray a beautiful prayer in church. Oh, you can give 20% of your money. But unless God knows He has all of you, can do with you what He wants to, not what you choose to do, you have unrepentant sin and you're working for God on your own terms. Number two, he had unshackled pride. Unshackled pride. God resists the proud, gives grace to those who are humble. And see, when he usurped the priestly office, he said, I'm going to do something because I've got to do it. And he did exactly what he wanted to do without God's approval. What else did he do in this unshackled pride in chapter 14? He set up a useless curse. He said, anybody that eats honey or any food is going to be killed. And guess who's the first one that came along and ate the honey? His son, Jonathan. You know, somebody that's full of pride will say they do things, and then when it comes down to it, they won't carry it out. And then when he got caught sinning, he said, oh, I'll repent, but honor me now before the people. You know, he says, I'll get right with God, but don't let it get out that I did it. You know what people like to do? They want to get right with God in private, but they won't pay the price to confess public sin when it needs to be confessed and say, I've been a stinker. Why don't people want to come and let people know they failed? Because their pride won't let them. They want people to think they're spiritual when God knows they don't, and they do too. That's what's keeping some of you here in this building from getting right with God because you know the way you feel. You know the way you act is wrong, but you won't come right and you won't go to the prayer room because by going to the prayer room, you're going to admit you have a need and everybody thinks everything's just right and you're in a mess. I was in Florida when my wife first got sick of her illness. She had left to go home to her mom and I was getting ready to leave that ministry. We had lost everything we had. I was living on $150 a week at that time and our hospital bills were mounting up and when people saw me in church, how are you doing brother? Oh, wonderful. Praise the Lord. Everything's just fine. Hallelujah. I was a good actor. And I was hurting and I was having demonic attacks on my life. I had things flying through my mind. Brother Pastor had not ever passed through my mind even when I was in sin. I felt the grip of Satan grabbing me. I felt like there was a wet blanket over my spirit. I felt I didn't want to go to church. When I went to church and taught Sunday school, I didn't want to be there because I felt like just running from the whole mess. I was so upset. And they were having a prayer meeting with 40 men in this double wide trailer and I went out there to pray. And when they went out to pray, God said, If you want to get free, you've got to admit where you're at. Unrobe hypocrite. Confess your faults one to another. Pray for one another that you may be healed. And I walked in front of that crowd and I said, Fellas, I'll admit to you, I'm scared to death. I'm depressed. I'm worried. I don't know what I'm going to do. I felt like my life was shattering apart and I said, If I don't have somebody pray for me, I feel like I'm going to lose my mind and dropped in the heat and started sobbing. See, I came clean of how I really was going on on the inside. You know what those 40 men did? All 40 got around me and started crying over me and praying over me and just prayed that God would bless me. And by the time they got to praying for me, their depression left me. And when I left that building, I had enough money to pay my bills in my pocket. What happened? I came clean of where I was at. See, some of you in here have had some awful struggles, but you're too proud to admit it. And pride goeth before a fall. Number three, he had unhindered demonic activity. Unhindered demonic activity. Notice in chapter 16, verse 14 of 1 Samuel. But the Spirit of the Lord departed from Saul, and an evil spirit from the Lord troubled him. And Saul's servant said unto him, Behold, an evil spirit from the Lord troubleth thee. And notice what else it says in chapter 18, verse 10. But it came to pass on the morrow that the evil spirit from God came upon Saul, and he prophesied in the midst of the house. And David played his hand at other times, and there was a javelin in Saul's hand. And Saul cast the javelin and said, I will smite David even to the wall with it. And David avoided his presence twice. Chapter 19, verse 9, And the evil spirit from the Lord was upon Saul, and he sat in the house, and his javelin was in his hand, and David played, and he threw the javelin again. Do you know what happened to Saul? Because he gave ground because of sin. Now folks, listen to me. If you have unrepented sin, and unchecked pride, and some of these other layers of ground, Satan has a right to send a demon and trouble you. How did it manifest in Saul's life? He began to lash out at people. He began to get very jealous of David and critical of David. And listen, he got so full of the devil that he acted out what was in his heart, what was there. He threw the javelin and tried to kill him. Now that some of you here wouldn't go that far, you'd get locked up in jail, but I guarantee you've had such ugly thoughts toward people for so long that you can't control them. And a lot of times those are demons that have got on the ground of unrepented sin and they drive people to feel certain ways. I know people can't control lust, can't control their desires, can't control their eating habits, can't control their thought life, can't control their fears, can't control their anger. Do you know people that pop off like a cork? When they get angry, it's like an explosion in a mattress factory. I know of two preachers right now. You know what their problem is? They get on a goth course and lose their salvation almost. They snap goth clubs in hand, sling them across the thing. I mean, can you imagine a preacher acting that way? I can. Do you know people that get under deep depression and can't come out? Do you know people that are so strong-willed that when somebody tries to check them from doing anything wrong, they're like this, don't you tell me what to do. I've seen people get so mad in the house of God preaching when the Word of God is preached, I've seen them walk out the door snorting like a bullfrog thinking they're right. Let me tell you something, folks. When demons get a hold of you, they don't quit until they've got you down. They'll drive you to absolute insanity if you let them. Playing with Ouija boards, water witching, all this stuff opens the door to the demons and this guy had unhindered demonic activity. Number four, he faced unhealthy rejection. Unhealthy rejection. You see, in chapter 16, to cause Saul's sin against God, the Lord said to Samuel, how long will you mourn for Saul seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? Fill thine horn and go and I will send thee to Jesse and for I have provided me a king among the people. You know what happened? Saul began to sense God rejecting him for being king. And on the other hand, when he did that unhealthy move of saying nobody touches honey and his son ate it, the people would not let Saul kill his son and he felt rejection from people. Do you know where people all of a sudden begin to commit suicide spiritually? It's when they feel rejected by people and by God. Now, God never rejects you as His child. I'll tell you what He'll do. He'll remove His power and presence off your life to let you know He's upset with you. Amen? Listen, the minute you and I sin, God will cut us loose from the dock of grace to teach us that if you want your own way, I'll give you a fill of it. And I know people in my life have felt rejected by God, rejected by family, rejected by fears. They feel like they're a failure. They feel like they're not accepted. They feel like they're not wanted. They feel like they're not appreciated. And you know what happens? When you begin to feel rejected, you'll start getting angry at God and angry at people. I know of a fellow, when he grew up, he wasn't that nice looking of a fellow and he went to date this girl. You know what this girl said to him? She said, You're a hick. Nothing but a hick. Stupid hick. And you know, that fellow from that day had a wounded spirit and throughout all his life, the devil built a fortress in that man's life. In the army, people put him down. In church, people put him down. His wife put him down. She's a dominating boss. Listen, wives should never be dominating bossy if they're women of God. Amen? Amen? Do you know what this fellow's problem was? He was so rejected that the only way he could find love was in the arms of a man. That's how far the devil attacked him. He had unchecked bitterness. That's the fifth level of ground. Unchecked bitterness. What? Oh, David went out there and took that slingshot and knocked Goliath down. Boy, the people had a fit over David. They said, Saul slain his thousands but David has slain his ten thousand. And the Bible says, Saul eyed David with envy and jealousy from that day on. He got bitter because David did a little bit better than him. Everywhere I turned, Saul was talking out of... You know, around David, he talked nice and then before David turned his back, he was trying to kill him with that javelin. He took it out on others. You know what? He was really mad at God because he didn't get his way. He couldn't beat the big shot. Unresolved relationships. Is there anybody in this world you're angry at and bitter? Is there anybody you talk ugly about? Tell you folks, bitterness is the nastiest, ugliest. It's like green denim that pours out of a person's soul. You don't have to say you're bitter. People can look in your eyes and sense your spirit. You're angry at somebody. You're upset at somebody. God just brought a verse of Scripture to my heart. You need not turn here, but I want to read it to you. This does not just usually say what's happened to a lot of people in the house of God. A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city and their contentions are like bars of a castle. David tried to love Saul and Saul said, I'm not going to let you love me because I'm mad because you made me look bad by knocking the giant down. And that evil spirit energized that bitterness. Every chance he got, he'd get a javelin. And I've seen people come to church and say, Oh, how I love Jesus. How I love the Lord. Bless the revival. But boy, they walk out the door and all the way home and say, boy, I'll let you know right now. And when they come in, they growl at the dog and kick at their kids. Have you seen people like that? Always angry. Always frustrated. Always antagonistic toward the things of God and people. I've seen bitterness eat the core. Listen to this story, folks. This will kill you. Listen to this story. One Monday afternoon on my answering machine, when I left the house, I left my answering machine on and one of my deacons called up and you could tell by the sound of his voice he was shaken up. He said, Brother Charlie? He said, Come over to the Zemp's house. They found Randy hanging in his bathroom and we think he committed suicide. I walked in that home, folks, and I've never heard such wailing, such crying. This young man was hanging up by the neck in his bathroom, hung. His daddy was on the road, a trucker, got ahold of him. I was the one who had to tell his daddy. I've never heard a man scream, Randy, why? Randy, why? Randy, why? The mother was crying and folks, the whole time there was something in that house that was evil. The guy didn't commit suicide. It was an accident on death because of a perverted sexual act. They found out later. The police told me. When the facts came out, during that whole scenario, the mother, because, you know, when you're in trouble and when you're under pressure, the real you comes out. When I got around her, bitterness years back, 20 years, 30 years of bitterness began to flow out of her mouth like green poison. Preacher, there's something wrong with the church. I can't worship when I go down there. Everybody rejected my son. Everybody back in that church hurt my son. Her eyes were venomous. When the daddy came in, I saw the mother being the dominant one. The daddy was almost acting like a woman and she took control and said, he's at fault too. He didn't love him. And all her life, she put down the daddy, built herself up, and the son took on what the mother was. Feminine, soft, bitter. When the truth came out, you know what the mother said? The mother would not admit he had an accidental death. She said, somebody murdered him. At the funeral, there was such a demonic power energizing this woman that she didn't even cry. She said, everything's fine. I love the Lord. And the daddy was crying like a baby, acting like the woman. Every time somebody came to her, she said, that preacher didn't minister to me. I was over at their house day and night for a week. And the only reason she got bitter at me, I would not agree with her bitterness. I said, yes, Ruth, there are things wrong with the church, but it's not nearly as bad as you think. Nobody loves me. And just all that bitterness spewing out. I've never been in such an atmosphere. They left our church. I told them. People started going over and trying to minister to them. And they said, the preacher didn't just love me. The Dickens are bad. And they started sowing discord amongst where it all began. Somewhere in her early life, she got angry and carried that in the house of God and every church she'd been in she wrecked. And it culminated when her son was involved in a perversion and in the middle of it. Can you imagine folks in the middle of a perversion going out and meeting Jesus that way? Unchecked bitterness. Number six, unfulfilled goals. He wanted to be a king and when he didn't get his way, he got injured. He valued his kingdom and his reputation more than God's. Do you know of people that when tragedy comes and their goals aren't met, they get mad at God and blame God for them not coming about? You know people like that upset because they did something that didn't work out and they blame God? Number seven, uncontrolled fear and worry. Chapter 18 verse 12. And Saul was afraid of David because the Lord was with him and departed from Saul. Chapter 18 verse 29. And Saul was yet more afraid of David and Saul became David's enemy continually. Chapter 28 verse 5. And when Saul saw the host of the Philistines, he was afraid and his heart greatly trembled. You know what happened? That fellow got so far from God that he started being worried and fearful about things that God could have handled in the past. Do you know what happens when you see somebody that God's on their life and you get around and you feel funny? The times I haven't been right and they're related to God and I've got around people right with God. Folks, I didn't want to be around them too long. You know why? Because I thought they could see through me. And most of them could. I was in the presence of a man of God in his 60's. I had lunch with him. I really wanted to ask him about, you know, spiritual awakening and all that. And I had a great need in my life. I was having a great struggle in my life and I was afraid to really... I wanted to tell him I was afraid of what he'd think of me. And that was pride. But God had mercy on me and inspired my pride. He knew I wanted to be right with him. And in the middle of this conversation, he starts telling this story about this young man that had this struggle and he thought it was demons and it wasn't. And he said, I prayed that God would give him the gift of repentance and when it got along, God gave him the ability to thoroughly repent and he's never had the problem. And in the car, he prayed for me in such a way that I sensed that he knew I was having a struggle. And all the way back, about an hour and a half, have you ever been so in a conviction that it made you mad? You know, God's rung your bell awful bad and you know what? I said, I'm never going to take that fellow out to lunch again. He makes me feel too uncomfortable. That's what people do in revival meetings. When God stings them, they stay away from the meetings. So I felt the same way. So if you bailed out this week, you need to repent for missing God. You missed a whole lot of blessings by judging this preacher and his style and his method and not seeing his heart. I got back to my study and the Spirit of God fell on me and I began to weep uncontrollably and for half an hour, I wept before God and God gave me the gift of repentance where I turned from that sin and I had freedom for months and months and months and months and months and months and months because I got to the presence of somebody that had no sense to tell me the truth even though I didn't want to hear it. Preacher, why did you tell us that story? Because, listen, Saul gave place to this fear of David because David, the Lord, was with him. And what happened when the enemy came, he started fearing the enemy. See, you can fear your friends and your enemies. See, you're locked up. When you fear your friends, you're in trouble. When you fear your enemies, you're in trouble. And you're locked up and you feel all alone and by yourself and nobody can help you. There are several people here. You act like everything's fine, but you're really afraid of what's going to happen because you see yourself slipping and you can't get out of it and the devil's got a lock on you because you know if you can't clean, it's going to cost you every bit of pride you've got in your life and you don't want to go that far. He had an unrestrained curiosity. You know what happened? He eventually went so far down that he went to a witch and asked to bring up the spirit of Saul. Now, it wasn't Saul. It was a demon that massacred Saul and that's Saul's voice, I believe. You know, you can go so far as to start going to the New Age movement. You'll go back to the pub. You'll go back to your old friends. You'll go back to your old habits. You'll go back to watching TV. You'll go back to smoking cigarettes. You'll go back to drinking booze. You'll go back to listening to rock music. You'll go back to listening to country music. You'll go back to your old buddies down on the corner. You know why? Because if God doesn't do it, you've got to find some substitute to get you help. I can usually tell you when people are going down, they quit. If they come to church all of a sudden, and having pretty good excuses they think to miss. There are some of you here saying, I don't know you well enough to know. Some of you here, you wouldn't miss a Sunday school service. You would not miss Sunday evening. You wouldn't miss a chance to witness. You wouldn't miss a chance to give. But now, friend, you're just like this. And you are making excuses for being a backslacker. You say, well, the people that minister to me, nobody loves me, and all this slop. It's really our responsibility to walk with God, folk. And you got involved in the ministry in the occult. Before you knew it, that fellow is in a mess. Number nine, he was unrealistic about eternity. He was unrealistic about eternity. You know what happened? He didn't realize that when he started this whole scenario of sin, of unrepentant sin, of pride, of bitterness, of fear, that one day he would be wounded and he didn't know if those people would kill him. They may have had mercy on him. He wasn't morally wounded. But because of fear of the enemy and because of his failure, he took a javelin and committed suicide. He would have to answer to God for taking his life. You know, everyone was here. Now, listen. Haven't heard a thing all week. Listen to this. Everybody here is going to die. Some sooner than others. You're going to take your last breath in, and when you meet Almighty God, every excuse, every bit of bitterness, every bit of selfishness, God will expose that and we've got to give an answer for it. I won't have an answer for you. You're not going to keep me from serving God. A long time ago, this preacher made up his mind that back biters, God robbers, hypocrites, liars in the church house would not keep me from enjoying Jesus Christ. I had a friend of mine. His name was Billy Baker. He got glasses about this thick. He kind of looks albino when he teaches. He can't see so well. He reads the Bible like this, but he's full of Jesus. He's one of my heroes, deacon in a church. I said, if Billy Baker came into church one Sunday morning with earrings, lipstick on, and a dress on saying, I've become a transvestite, I'm going to serve Jesus anyway. You know what the problem has been with some of you? You've been looking at people and people brought you down to the other level because you've got your eyes on people rather than Jesus. If you look at people, can I tell you what's going to happen if you look at me long enough? You're going to see my failures, my problems, my inadequacies, and my sins. And I'll do the same thing to how I look at you. The problem is we're not to look at one another, we're to look at Jesus. And so, the devil's going to show you all my faults. He'll show you all your preacher's faults. And you've already seen a bunch of mine. What's the big deal? You won't have to answer for me, but I guarantee you, friend, you'll have to answer for you. I was flying in the other day. You know what I thought? I said, God, I hope this airplane makes it to this meeting because I don't want to meet you right now. Well, you want to meet Jesus in the spiritual condition you're in right now, friend. Bitterness in your heart, pride, things you look on TV, your rebellion, your gossip. You want to meet God with those in your heart? Listen, you're not promised tomorrow. The last point is this. He faced an unexpected tragedy. He got the news, said three of your sons have been killed. He said, defeat is on us. He fully expected after seeing that witch, he'd go out there in that battle and win it. You know what happens when you have unexpected tragedies? There are a lot of people who get mad at God. Loss of a kid, loss of a husband, loss of a job, loss of a spiritual position. You know what you do? You punish God by not serving Him the way He wants you to. It takes a spiritual person to face unexpected tragedies and go on. There are a lot of you here using preachers for your excuse not to serve God. Isn't that an awful, awful, awful excuse to stand before God and say that preacher failed me back there and that's why I'm upset and that's why I've held out on God. Or all of a sudden somebody in my family, my parents faced a divorce and they divorced this child and I'm mad at God because he let that happen and you've been living with that all your life or had a divorce or went through a tragedy losing your job or somebody in the church disappointed you or somebody in the church stabbed you in the back. That's what happened to David. He said, I could handle anything with this. It was somebody who was my closest friend in church and before I knew it they stabbed me in the back and hurt me. And now you're punishing God for what the devil did. I know of a man that when he got to be in his fifties he got terrible type of arthritis that nearly it took it his knees began to gnaw up and he began to walk like this and he's a very healthy man. And we saw him suddenly could just go like this and his countenance depression hit him and one day my mother said Bully took a shotgun and blew his brains out and killed himself. You know why he couldn't handle the fact his physical health left him? I wonder if some of you haven't given ground because something happened in your past you're blaming God for and you're holding out in your heart because you don't want to give God the pleasure of using you because you're mad at him. See, Old Saul took ten steps and each step leads to a greater diminishing of spiritual power. Oh, you may never spiritually physically take your life but if you take your life spiritually you might as well be dead because you're no use to God and you're a lot of use to the devil. Preacher, why do you preach on this? Because I think there are several people here that are on that road and just about ready. You may be mine. See, I know of a fellow in my church that got saved out of being a motor biker a dope addict and got saved and his wife supposedly got saved. Now listen to me. You listen to me. For a year his wife walked with God supposedly. I don't believe she really got saved. One day he called her work and they said she left with a man and it was a man of another race. She left him and wrote him notes and said, I don't want to ever see you again. He got so mad at her. He was a big fellow. Tattoos all over his arms. Big, huge fellow went in there. He was so mad at her he lost his temper and took the screen door off. Grabbed her by the neck and shook her. The devil out of her. That's not right. And she had him arrested. Now he repented and asked for forgiveness. I got a businessman in my church to help him out and get a good attorney. We picked up the bill because we didn't think jail would do him any good. And for two years let me tell you she up and down the streets of Hagerstown went out and borrowed and they called her the queen because she slept with so many men. Do you know what that man did for two years? He said, for better or for worse for richer or poorer I want her back. He walked in my office one day, preacher, and said, preacher, if my wife with her boyfriend walked in church today they could sit on the same row with me and I can worship because I've forgiven her in my heart even though she hasn't asked for forgiveness. That fellow had such a testimony, son. He shook hell up all over that city. One more people and Jesus just walking into places. But one day you know what happened? He got mad at God. Why? Because he said, I've gone two years and if I don't get her back now I'm going to get her back my way. In fact, he began to find every little thing that I didn't do for him got critical. Oh no, he didn't tell us about the time we gave him $500 to fly out to California and get her in the middle of the night to go to his house and pray and cry with him. And every time he wanted access to me he could call me at home and I'd leave my family and go see him. He never said that. But once you get angry at God for him you'll see everybody else is false. And then he began to criticize me, the deacons. He made a mistake. Somebody hurt his feelings. And he told me in my office two months before he bailed out and when he said it he said, I've made up my mind how I'm going to backslide. I'm going to find every excuse in the church that's wrong and use those for my reason for leaving. His life story had been sent to you at the Unshackled Radio Program at Moody and they were about ready to put it together and send it up to 690 stations around the world. And one week before he was supposed to come out he left the church and bought him a $12,000 Harley Davidson motorcycle. And by the way, he called him to buy his Harley before he got saved by Elzebub. Got on that Harley grew a beard out got a cigar in his mouth and went down on Jonathan Street where all the dopers were and ran up to his wife one night and said, get on baby you got me back. And he gave in to her and he got her back his way. And you can't find him in church today. I went to see him many, many times and I said, Gary, why don't you come back to DC because you and all the hypocrites down there, you didn't love me when you should have and God didn't give me back my wife. He did it his way. God eventually took him off my heart not to even pray for that man. I don't know what happened to him in the kingdom. People go back to see him and all he did was feed green venom fussing about the church. Friend, some of you here are just about ready to walk over God's deadline. God's taught heavy duty here today. Have you already committed spiritual suicide? The good reason is God's blood cleanses you from all sin but you've got to humble yourself in the prayer room that meet you far away from God. Self-will and pride walk my way. And God saved you, became a man who humbled himself for you and me, died on a cross for you and that day you came to Jesus. Do you remember the day you came to Jesus? He forgave you and the joy you used to have and now you're so vindictive and critical and upset with God that you're sitting here wishing you could get out. You used to shout about preaching like this and now, you know why? Because you're about going down two more steps today. If you walk out after this one, it's not going to be on my hands what happens to you. I'm clean. And you can talk about this southern enthusiasm preacher that's getting all everybody, folks, there have been some folks here that have been set free but you've missed it. And that's a good indication of where you're at. This kind of preaching doesn't touch you. Friend, what is? Oh, but you're right with God. Saul thought he was right with God. I did it my way. There's only two ways. My way or God's way. Which way are you on? Unrepentant sin. Unhealthy rejection. Uncontrollable fear. Unrestrained demonic activity. Has the devil fought this message in your heart and you feel a strain in your soul? Are there deep wounds of fear and problems? There are several people here. You've got things you cannot control. Something comes on you and you can't control it. It's a demon of hell that's got on some ground in your life. Until you repent of it, you can't do anything with it. Do you have children you can't control? Do you have loved ones you can't contend with? Are you bitter at anybody in this world? Anybody. If you have any, any anger or bitterness, you've given place to the devil. But the good news is this. God sets the capsules free. He would have never allowed me to preach this message if He did not have hope for all of us. Preacher, have you ever been on this road many times? But thank God, His grace kept me from going any further. Do you know during the time my wife was sick in Florida, do you know what I was actually thinking about doing, Preacher? Taking some pills, getting myself an insurance policy and ending it all and saying, I can't take it anymore. In fact, even after I repented of that, I went to two people that were experts in spiritual warfare and they had to resist the devil and I had to get those demons off my life. I'd given them so much ground. And I was a preacher. What is God saying today? The good news is this. You can be set free if you can meet God. God gave Saul a number of chances to repent, but he didn't because he did it his way. Let's bow together in prayer as our pianist comes. We'll be singing this morning the time. We haven't gone overboard with time. Plenty of time to meet God. Father, take the message. Save that life that's on the road to destruction. May your spirit do its office work. May people forsake their pride and humble themselves under the mighty hand of God so they can be lifted up in due time. Who would say that a preacher without a doubt, God has spoken to me? There's some level I'm involved in one or two, maybe three, maybe somewhere along the line these things are tracking out in my life and I didn't see them as roads to spiritual suicide. Would you pray for me today that I could slip to the prayer room as we sing and settle some things. I've gotten away from God. See, Saul said he performed the commandment of God. See, some of you say, oh, I'm doing all I can do, but you know you haven't and you're blaming others for not and that's sin, partial obedience. It's disobedience. Preacher, pray for me. God's speaking to my heart today. Thank you. You're proud to keep even from raising your hand. Preacher, pray for me. Thank you. Preacher, pray for me. Lord, the needs are here and we pray for those especially who raised their hands. Now, God, I've obeyed you. I believe you've given a clear warning, but also a clear way of getting out. In this invitation, those who even now are just resisting you, break through the resistance and give them a desire to come back to you just like you did that day with that preacher. Give them a desire. Give them the gift of repentance, Lord. There's too much at stake here for the devil to have right anymore. Oh, God, have mercy. In Jesus' name. Amen. I want you to stand at your feet.