JT-01-1791-1807

1791-1807

I, Joseph Thomas was born in North Carolina, Orange County, March 7th, 1791. My parents were natives of Pennsylvania, who, in an early period of their lives, soon after being wedded together, emigrated to the place where I was born. Being among the first settlers who penetrated the uncultivated wilds of that part of the country, soon found that frugality and industry were indispensable to their subsistence, consequently became inured to the common hardships of a laboring life, by which they shortly obtained a comfortable competency. Not many years rolled away, till they found themselves possessed of a considerable share of honest wealth, surrounded with several children--sons and daughters. The Revolutionary war came on which soon spread devastation and death over that section of country. The British, commanded by Lord Cornwallis, plundered and devoured the last remains of my father’s property, excepting his land.

After this war, my parents, by their industry, repaired their wasted fortune and obtained the second time a sufficient living. But alas! the day of prosperity soon passed away and was succeeded by the storms of adversity, affliction and distress. The property they had accumulated, by a change of times, which a course of intemperance, on my father’s part, was spent, scattered and entirely wasted! By this time, they had nine children, seven sons and two daughters, the most of whom were grown men and women, but myself, being the youngest child. The first seven years of my life, I had the guardian care of a dear father and the affectionate attention of a fond mother, in which home I was taught to read, write and cypher. In the year 1798, hard necessity compelled that I should be separated from my parents, and from my once peaceful home! My abode was now appointed me in a strange, inhospitable and cruel family! It was stipulated, that, while there, I should go to school; but my ungenerous host evaded this, and engrossed my time entirely to his own purposes. At this unfriendly place, I dwelt almost two years, and every leisure hour, I employed myself in reading the books my father had given me, among which my favorites were the Economy of Human Life and the New Testament. At this place I was cruelly treated, suffering the extremes of hunger and cold, &c., &c. Here I often bewailed my parents’ misfortunes, and the loss of my former home, and learned by hard necessity, the distressing condition of many helpless children, who are constrained from their parents, to dwell among unfeeling strangers. During this period I thought about dying, and much about eternity, which, with my natural disposition; caused me to be more solemn and melancholy, than boys at that age commonly are. When I was about nine years old one of my brothers (who was a married man) living in Grayson county, Virginia, came and took me away from this cruel and inhospitable place, and I cheerfully went home with him, about 150 miles from the place of my nativity. Being now, more than before, among strangers, I continued to feel melancholy, and as an orphan cast upon the mercy of a friendless world. I had no one to look to for There I soon found myself as an orphan, or like one without father or mother, though in name had both, yet in reality had not the protection nor advice of the one, nor the affectionate caresses of the other, for mountains and rivers intervened between us. Here I had no one to look to for the support of my body, the improvement of my protection, advice, or for sustenance but my brother. He was kind to me and soon engaged me to a school, near his abode, to which I went some months and made a pleasing proficiency in reading, writing, and arithmetic. In December 1801, when I was nearly ten years old, I was taken with the White Swelling in my left knee, and was soon unable to walk, or to stand upon my feet during the space of eighteen months. In this time I felt the most excruciating pain that humanity is capable of supporting. It was long anticipated from day to day, by myself and those who saw me, that my agonies and affliction, would soon terminate in death. Once, while lying helpless on my bed, my brother being absent, my sister-in-law found occasion to leave home. Previous to her going, she carried in some dry fuel and laid it in the chimney place, between the fire and chimney side. In a short time after her departure, the fuel caught fire and conveyed it to the wood of which the chimney which was composed, and were soon kindled into a furious blaze, roaring up the chimney and gathering into the logs on that end of the house. Lying with my face towards the fire, I apprehended the danger, but was utterly unable to move out of the place. My thoughts and feelings on this occasion were inexpressible, for death, to all appearance, was inevitable. I tried, but tried in vain to escape from my bed, and found no alternative but to resign myself to the mercy of God, and to the devouring element. The fire increased until one side of the chimney was burnt through and the end logs of the house considerably kindled. But what was astonishing and pleasing to me by the time I thought the blaze would be kindling in the roof, it descended the chimney and presently subsided. And yet the more was I convinced of the interposition of divine goodness, when in a few hours the fire became entirely extinguished! This I thought was the "Lord’s doings and marvelous in my eyes." From this singular deliverance, (as I esteemed it) I received an impression, that God would preserve me, and not let me die with my present complaint.

While in this affliction, the misdemeanors and sins of my former days came into review, and I felt the compunctions of a guilty conscience. I sincerely regretted my sins and promised a better course of life, if I should be spared. I found comfort in the gospel promises and believed I was prepared to die. In the month of March 1802, after being confined near eighteen months to my bed, in which time one of bones of my left was taken out, with the loss of many small pieces. I was again able to stand on my feet, and to walk by the aid of crutches. Not long after this till I could walk without their assistance! I now viewed myself as a miracle of God’s almighty goodness--as a stranger upon the stage of action, and as one who had just come from the regions of the grave and shadow of death!! Not long after being restored to my feet, till lost sight of the goodness of God, forgot the solemn promises I had made to him, and again began to wander in the forbidden paths of youthful folly and sin. In a few weeks I was taken with a complaint similar to that which I was so severely afflicted with in my leg, in my opposite thigh bone, and was soon unable to walk. In this attack, I was again severely afflicted, and for some months confined to my bed, and it was now thought I never would walk any more. I again renewed my promises and besought the Lord to have mercy on me. In a few months, beyond the most sanguine expectations, I was enabled, the second time, to rise and walk, and was looked upon as a wonder, while I was seen running and playing with my former associates!

Early in the year 1803, I was removed to Montgomery (now Giles) county, Virginia, to take my residence with a brother, who at that time kept Bachelor’s Hall. He was then a frolicsome young man, and the people, old and young about the place, generally were uncivil and wicked. I was, of course, insensibly drawn from the paths of morality and religion, and too often constrained to imitate some of the practices predominant around me. In the latter end of the same year, I was removed to neighbor Andrew Johnston’s, on New River, in the same county, as a boarder to go to school. In this man I found a friend, and the first moral preceptor I had met with. I have since always remembered him with gratitude and affection, for the moral and wholesome instructions which he gave me, during my stay with him. My teacher also became partial and particularly attentive to me. I took the best advantage, and made the wisest improvement from the instructions of these men, that I could. Here I dwelt about one year, in which time I found myself far advanced in arithmetic, considerably so in mathematics, geography, &c. When my time expired here, Mr. Johnston would receive nothing of my boarding, nor the teacher for my tuition. During this term, I had many serious reflections and often refused to play at school, from the solemn impressions, sometimes made on my mind. I had a New Testament which I carried with me, which, in all my leisure hours, I read with great pleasure, and became particularly fond of those places that spake of the blessed Jesus, the Savior of the world, and of the miracles and wonderful works which he wrought among men. My mind was often seriously exercised, and I frequently dreamed of attending the sermons and travels of the Savior, where thousands were congregated. I often imagined, in my sleeping hours, that I was preaching the gospel to hundreds and thousands, in different parts of the world!! In November 1804, I left my benefactor, my teacher and my youthful acquaintances, and went to Grayson County again, and in the neighborhood where I had been so much afflicted. I hired myself to my brother’s father-in-law, the term of one year, for ninety dollars. One third of this time I taught school, and the balance I worked up the farm. Religion was scarcely named by any person about here in those days. Vice and irreligion prevailed. I heard one sermon in this time, which was the first religious meeting I had been at since I left Carolina. The discourse awakened and encouraged me to pray. Lorenzo Dow came through the country about this time, and caused the people to talk something about religion. I read his chain, which had a serious and lasting impression on my mind. I felt condemned before God. Guilt hung heavy on my soul, and I again more frequently resorted to prayer. But I felt no relief from the convictions and anguish of a broken spirit. In October 1805, my engagement being fulfilled with the man I lived with, I received my wages, and went on to Carolina, to see my mother and other relations I had living there. My aged mother rejoiced to see me, after the absence of five years, and that God had preserved me through all the afflictions and necessities that had befallen me. There was a great revival of religion about here at that times. Preaching and prayer meetings were frequent. I attended some of them, and felt pleased to hear the name of God praised, though I could not experimentally join the glad song. After a few weeks I left my mother and other weeping friends, and returned to Grayson county in Virginia again. On my way, my heart was almost drowned with sorrow. I felt that I had no home, and that I was destitute of the salvation of my soul, which I desired above anything on earth. In Grayson I hired with my brother, whom I had formerly lived, the term, of three months. Here my distress of mind increased, and I was soon convinced that my soul was in too much danger of being lost, if I continued long in so wicked a place. I resolved that when my time was out, I would leave this part of the country. In March 1806, I went to Carolina again, the place of my nativity, and commenced living with my brother James and my mother, who lived together. I now went frequently to meeting, and read much in the Scriptures. My former convictions became more pungent and my sins rose more conspicuous to my view. This was in the time of the celebrated revival, when it was no strange thing to hear many, old and young, profess religion, and to see them engage in the unaccountable exercises of shouting, dancing, hallowing, jumping, laughing, &c. &c.

There was a great Union meeting, (by some called Camp meeting) appointed to be held near where I lived, in October 1806. I looked forward to this meeting with pleasing expectations, and strongly hoped that at it I might find the pearl of great price, the salvation of my soul. At this meeting, preachers and people of different denominations met. On the first day of meeting, I went early to the place, where by seeing the numerous tents and wagons already arranged on the ground, and the crowds of people pressing from every direction, my mind was solemnized and penitential tears stole from my eyes. The first sermon was delivered by a traveling man, then immediately from Georgia, who professed to belong to no party, but to the Church of Christ in general. His text and sermon were concerning Naaman, the leper, who was commanded to dip himself seven times in the river Jordan. In his description of Naaman, I thought some person had told him my feelings and my character. I thought the most he said was aimed at, and intended for me. Near the conclusion of his sermon, many had fallen to the earth around me, crying for mercy, and I fell among them. I sent for the preacher to come and pray for me. Many prayers were offered for me, but alas, my heart was too unbelieving to receive the blessing I had so long sought, and without which, I was now sensible I would be miserable and utterly lost. The exercises of my mind during this meeting, were various and sometimes inexpressible. At times I felt some consolation, and almost concluded that I was redeemed front my sins, by the blood of Christ. At other times, my heart would so fill with unbelief, that I would almost conclude there was no mercy nor salvation fur such a wretch as I. As the following occurrence, which took place during this meeting, was so very singular, and made an impression which is not yet eradicated from my mind, I will here relate it. Being tired and sleepy, one night I lay down in a tent, and while I slept, I imagined I saw a very aged and grave man stand at the door of the tent, and heard him call to me; I answered (I thought) and asked him who he was? He said, "I am Isaiah, the Prophet." Upon which he said to me, "rise up and I will give you something which came from heaven." I obeyed. He then showed me a piece of wood, near the size and shape of a small man, and it seemed deeply stained all over with blood, and said, you have a long journey to travel which you must shortly commence, and you must carry this all the way with you. He then held a small loaf of bread in his hand, and said, "you must take this loaf, and when you get weary and faint, eat of it. This loaf will last you about forty-eight years and six months, about which time, for the sake of what you carry, strangers shall kill you." He then handed them to me, and told me to receive them as the gifts of God. I took the wood and stood it by me, and received the bread in my hand. I ate a small portion of it, and immediately I felt it strengthen, cheer and animate me in every part, and I became so happy I could not forbear leaping, praising and thanking God. My agitation awoke me. I felt happy, and thought for a moment, that God had sent a heavenly visitant to feed me upon the bread of life, and had converted my soul while I slept. But my comfort shortly fled, unbelief again beclouded my mind, and I went to the stand where the preachers were, and requested them to pray for me. But I could not feel my soul fully relieved from doubts and sorrow. On the eighth day from the commencement of this meeting, it drew to a close. During this time, the love of God was manifested in the union of his children of different professions, in the conviction of many others who left the ground seeking the Lord. I left the ground solemn and mournful, not fully believing I had yet obtained the forgiveness of my sins. After this meeting, I continued to seek the Savior, by constantly attending meetings, by private prayer, and by an attentive reading of the Scriptures. I was for some time tossed to and fro in my mind, sometimes almost sunk in despair, burdened with grief and sorrow and at other times felt glad that the Lord had showed me so much mercy. For some months the exercises of my mind, were so conflicting and distressing, that my flesh reduced almost to a skeleton; and I could enjoy but little comfort in anything on earth. On the 7th of May, 1807, early in the morning, having spent the night previous, in groans and tears, I arose and sought a private place in a distant wood, where I often had resorted, determining if there was yet mercy with God for me, I would wrestle with him in prayer, till I would find deliverance from the intolerable burden that pressed my sorrowful soul. I found the place I sought, and sometime after sunrise, I found the Lord Jesus. The love of God was shed abroad in my heart--I found the blessing I had so long sought, and for which I had shed so many tears, and uttered so many groans. O! the glory, the transporting joys that filled my soul! Had I the wings of an eagle, and the voice of a trumpet, I, would have declared to the whole world, the wonders God had wrought on my soul. The joys of that day were unutterable and never to be forgotten.

Immediately when I experienced this change, a manifestation of equal plainness was made to my mind, that I should follow Jesus in the ordinance of baptism, by immersion, as a public testimony of my faith in him, and of my hope in the resurrection of the body to eternal life. It was also made plain to me at the same time, that I should have to preach the gospel, and not only to those who are nigh, but also to those afar off. Some days I enjoyed uninterrupted peace and great tranquility of soul. Not long till my mind became exercised on the subject of connecting myself to some religious denomination. To be suited in this matter, I was involved in deep concern and deliberation, as I found it difficult to determine for the best. It was now evidently my duty, when I presented myself as a petitioner to a church for membership, I should also offer myself a candidate for the ministry of the gospel. I had been made acquainted with the principal doctrines, and with the church government of the Presbyterians, the Methodists, the Calvinists and Freewill Baptists. The Presbyterian or the Baptist church would have suited me in point of their government; but their doctrine, to my mind, so evidently apposed the doctrines of the Scriptures, and the whole course of my experience, that I thought it unnecessary to offer myself to either. The most of the important points of the Methodist doctrine, seemed to accord with my faith; but their government appeared to me, to be so evidently contrary to that of the primitive church of Christ, and such as I thought would abridge that liberty which the Lord had just given me, I could not, in conscience, offer myself to them. I conversed with a Freewill Baptist preacher, concerning his doctrine, government, &c. I shortly found some things in the way, and such that prevented my joining in membership with him. I then requested him to baptize me by immersion, but he would not, unless I would join his faith and order. This was a source of grief to my soul, as I already began to discover this difficulty, that I would either have to sacrifice my conscience and my faith, or, as I thought, stand alone and be opposed by the surrounding sects.

About this time I heard of a people who called themselves Christians, and who professed to take the Scriptures for their rule of faith and practice. I was informed where one of their preachers lived. I went to see him, to get information on this subject, which at this time gave me great concern.

He informed me that they, as a people, regarded the Scriptures as the only rule of faith and practice; that they held open and free communion with all Christians; that they owned no name but CHRISTIAN--that there were no Popes, Bishops, nor Presiding Elders among them; and that they were all alike amenable to each other, and had an equal voice in all matters that concerned the church. I rejoiced to hear of such a people, for this seemed to be the plan must favorable to Christian liberty, and the most similar to that church established under the Apostles. I their told him of the exercises of my mind concerning the ministry. He encouraged me, and informed me where I might see a number of those preachers at a meeting, to be held at Raleigh, N. Carolina, about fifty miles distant, to whom he thought I had better present myself as a candidate for the ministry. Shortly after this, I presented myself to the church, of which this man (B. Rainey) was pastor, for membership amongst them. They received me as a member, dad gave me license as an exhorter. I now began to close up my little worldly concerns, and prepare for an itinerant life in the gospel. I exercised in exhortation frequently through the neighborhood, but my efforts were weak and much ridiculed by many who heard me. Many excuses and difficulties I brought forward to exonerate myself from the arduous and important task that imposed on me. But nothing less than a compliance, promised any relief to my troubled mind. My mother, relations, and the most of those who conversed on the subject, rigidly opposed the undertaking. And had I not been strongly convinced, that the spirit of the Lord inspired and moved me to the work, I would not have assumed a calling for which I thought myself so little qualified. I counted the cost--I determined to obey God, rather than be intimidated by man, or overcome by inferior obstacles.

I now surrendered all pretensions to the advantages of this world, and to the gratification of carnal appetites. I bade farewell to ease, to the hopes of honor, to the popularity, and to the friendship of a gain-saying generation, and freely sacrificed them all upon the cross of Christ, resolving to follow the footsteps of Jesus, whom I now took to be my only friend. I considered myself starting on a mission, the most important ever engaged in by man, and on a pursuit which was to occupy my constant and assiduous attention, during the remainder of my days. The 19th day of October 1807, when I was sixteen years and about nine months old, I bade farewell to my mother, my relations, and to a sneering world, and started for the meeting in Raleigh, and thence to people and lands unknown. In going six miles I was upon strange ground! I traveled fourteen miles, and tarried all night with an old Christian preacher, Elder Debruler, who I soon learned was going to the same meeting. Next morning we went on about thirty miles into the neighborhood of Raleigh, and held meeting. Here I was called upon to speak. The cross was great--I spake but little and closed with mortified and discouraged feelings. I soon retired and spent the most of the afternoon in prayer, meditation, and reading.

Friday 22d, we went on to Raleigh, where I was introduced to a family with whom I was received during the meeting. At 12 o’clock preaching commenced. Here were James O’Kelly, and William Guiry, the most eminent and popular of that church in the Southern regions. During this meeting, I opened my mind to J. O’Kelly on the subject of baptism, and desired him to immerse me. But in explaining the nature and use of baptism to me, he made it mean pouring. I believed from his age, experience and abilities of mind, he must be right, and on the Sabbath day of the meeting, I was baptized (as we then called it) in that way, I was received by the preachers, as one licensed to make trial of my ministerial abilities. Here were four candidates, young men, besides myself, presented themselves at this meeting for the ministry. All were received, and each was appointed to travel and labor with an Elder, till the next union meeting, which was to convene in six months.

I was appointed to travel with J. Warren, on James’ river and some of the lower counties of Virginia. Before I left Raleigh I was ridiculed and insulted by a Methodist preacher, whom I took to be a Deist, until I was informed otherwise. By this I found, that not only the non-professor but sectarians, whose policy and craft I did not promote, would oppose and endeavor to hinder my progress in the cause I had espoused. From this meeting I started in company with my intended preceptor and benefactor, and two other preachers; and we traveled together four days. We held several meetings, and I being called on to officiate, either if I refused or complied, I felt confounded and ashamed, and was soon convinced that the preachers were of opinion my inability would disparage and injure the cause I wished to support. I now was upwards of two hundred miles from home, a stranger in a strange part of the world, having no friend to assist, encourage or strengthen me in the glorious cause I had espoused.

Friday, 29th October, I and the man I was to travel with, parted from the other preachers, and fell upon a long chain of appointments which had been previously given out for him. I soon found my companion was an irritable, illiterate man; and so little acquainted with human nature, that he knew not how to make proper allowance for inexperience and youth. Believing I could not perform as an acceptable preacher, he became tired of me, and frequently advised me to give up the task and go home. He often tried to offend and mortify me in private, and in company. One day while speaking, I observed I considered myself as a lamb sent out among wolves, &c. At this a man in the congregation took offence--rose up and commanded me to hush, and with an angry countenance, coming forward, seemed determined, as he said, if I did not hush to pull me down. Some of the people interfered, and the congregation were generally disturbed. The preacher told me, he thought this was an evidence that I was doing harm and ought to quit. But I told him I took this as a trial for my faith, and not as an evidence that I was not called to the ministry.

We traveled on through Mecklinburgh, Lunenburgh, Prince George, Prince Edward, Queen Ann, Henrico, Chesterfield and Amelia counties in Virginia, in which time the trials, temptations and difficulties of my mind, were inexpressible. By this time, I plainly discovered the preacher felt little concern for my interest, or solicitude for my success. Hearing of another Christian preacher by the name of Thomas Reeves, and he being recommended as a more suitable man for me to travel with, I resolved, though he was upwards of an hundred miles from me, I would go and see him. In December I bid adieu to the old preacher, who had been a source of grief to me, and started on by myself through a strange part of country, and in six days I found T. Reeves in Surry county, Va. I introduced myself to him, as one of the weakest laborers in the vineyard of our Lord.

I soon found him of open, free and liberal mind--kind and affectionate in his disposition. He received me to travel with him, and promised to lend me all the aid and support he could afford.

We went on, and for many days held meetings once, sometimes twice every day. My timidity, which had been a great obstacle in the way of my speaking, now began to wear off, and I felt a little more liberty, but was yet so weak and unpopular, that the most of the brethren advised brother Reeves to dismiss and send me home. But he thought I ought to make a longer trial, and frequently exhorted me to application, diligence and perseverance, and if I would be faithful, he had no doubt but that God would make me an instrument of much good.

About Christmas, we were some miles below Norfolk, and went to brother Rice Haggard’s, a Christian preacher. I found him to be of strong intellect, and of profound piety. He exhorted me to be faithful, and the Lord would make me useful. I loved him and received with joy his counsels.

We turned our course and went up the country again--passing through Norfolk, Portsmouth, Suffolk, the Isle of Wight county, Surry and Southampton. Here we came to old brother B. Barrett’s, (a Christian preacher.) Here the work of the Lord revived. Brother Barrett gave me good counsel, and by his affectionate conversation, I was much consoled, strengthened and encouraged.