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Joined: 2006/2/2
Posts: 5


I was wondering what you guys think about courtship as a means to build a relationship to one day get married. I was also wondering if you have any testimonies of this, what does it mean to you and why did you choose to do it and how do you judge what level to stop emotionally at.

 2006/2/2 22:41Profile

Joined: 2005/10/21
Posts: 133
Wellington, Ohio

 Re: Courtship

Right now i am in a courtship with a beautiful girl.

I do not believe in dating for a number of reasons. From a simply practical standpoint, I have never heard of a testimony of a dating experience turn out to be worthwhile. In other words, it seems that people usually end up more hurt and with more emotional wounds in the end than they started with and not having overall been edified by the experience.

Secondly, I do not think it is in the spirit of Christianity to go around from person to person pursuing a partner that God may or may not have in His will for you. Paul advised that you seek not a wife. He said this was his own wisdom, and not a command, but it is very sound wisdom. For one, our heart needs to be set on God, and the only reason we should ever get married is with the express purpose of glorifying God and seeking Him together with the other person. Therefore, we should be patient and wait for Him to give us direction in that area, rather than running from person to person seeking it ourselves. We should take all of our comfort in Him, and be content with His love, and wait.

I also believe that every relationship should have the express purpose in mind of getting married in the end. I do strongly believe this, for going around and giving yourself over to people emotionally is no different than going around and giving yourself over to people physically. Relationships, both physical and emotional, should proceed with caution and many things need to wait for marriage.

So for those reasons I certainly do not think we should just be dating for 'fun', and I think that we should not pursue the "date and see" method because you can be very hurt and you will be distracted away from God. For all of these reasons, I believe we should be very firm and confident in God's will for the relationship before we even enter into it.

I prayed for 9 months before pursuing a relationship with the one i am with now. She was praying about it too. It is a blessing to be confident in God's will.

Joe E

 2006/2/2 23:12Profile

Joined: 2003/7/31
Posts: 2763
Phoenix, Arizona USA

 Re: Courtship

Here is one of the most incredible testimonies of a godly courtship that you will ever find, simply beautiful. Please read this carefully.

[url=]A Courtship Testimony[/url]

In Christ,


Ron Halverson

 2006/2/2 23:34Profile

Joined: 2005/2/24
Posts: 2732


I think this is the core concept.

It is a blessing to be confident in God's will.

Christian courtship and marriage testimonies will offer a variety of virtuous and sound methodologies and approaches. Some demonstrate respect for parental participation and even pastoral oversight, while others point out the importance of prayerful patience and time. (And certainly there are many worldy codes of conduct that are simply unnacceptable in Christian relationships.)

Yet, I don't think we can ever elevate a methodology in this matter above simple obedience to the Lord. So why we read people's awesome testimonies, and learn from some of their wise choices, I think we should foremost note the purity of their hearts towards the Lord in this matter.

Now having said all that, I certainly wouldn't want to suggest that people shouldn't share the wisdom of their successes, (and failures) in this thread!

Just some thoughts,


Mike Compton

 2006/2/3 3:03Profile

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