| Pray that I wed in Humble thanksgiving and repentance.|
It is not well until we offer it unto God that he makes it sanctified and well in his sight. and presence. I greet you all in the name of Jesus who lives yesterday today and tomorrow.
Today I come before this house asking that the mighty love of God descents upon my family. I am just married and am now seeking to be consecrated, my wife and family before God. I have spent the past week in denial and at best seeking if I could hear God's point of view in all that has been proposed to be done by me or anyone about the Marriage lately.
The last posting I made before this house was a prayer request for my land of origin, Zimbabwe. Before that I had put before you a case that requested that you pray for a sinnful relationship that I sought before God. It was not all to get married in the manner that follows our culture. I asked that I know from someone amongst you what I should do to be saved thus in the Christian manner. Today I come before you not seeking to be told how a man can be born again but seeking Godly wisdom in ways that can make my white wedding to my wife a Godly event.
I have been in denial that this has to come to pass, yet today I am seeking God's consent to what I have to bear, I am praying that it be well with me as it was with those who go before me. As a Christian that is. I pray for obedient peace for my wife and I pray for the same to my in-laws from me inspite of all that has come to pass. As I fast today i pray that the cause I am doing this for moves a number of you to assist me in prayer. :-)
| 2005/10/1 10:53||Profile|
Santa Clara, CA
| Re: Pray that I wed in Humble thanksgiving and repentance.|
Went back and retraced your former posts. It seems a bit unclear as to what you refer to as 'denial' now, but my prayers are with you nonetheless.
but seeking Godly wisdom in ways that can make my white wedding to my wife a Godly event.
He will see to that dear brother, put your trust in Him alone, forgetting the past and moving forward. May the Lord bless your marriage brother, causing it to give glory to Himself.
| 2005/10/1 13:00||Profile|
| Re: Praying.|
Congratulations on your marriage.
We have a small language/interpretation problem here, so you may want to explain this in a different way possibly.
If you have already been married, then you are already "wed".
Whatever the case, we certainly love and serve a Faithful Lord God, who understands your situation entirely and I will pray with you that all things go as He sees best, for all concerned.
We pray for His Will and for our own growth and to be a good witness to our families.
I pray you are given the strength and patience to be that good witness, to represent Christ and His Love to your wife and in-laws.
Lord give you strength and His Love and Wisdom and meet every need within your prayer request.
| 2005/10/2 12:22|
In our culture, due to the mix-up that happened by the coming in of the Westerners during the colonial era from Britain, it so happened that the marriage issue got a bit complicated. For a person to get married first the man pays the bride price for his wife to be to his in-laws. After this comes the stage of consecration to God of the marriage, this is our essence of the White wedding. So as it is he picture is not complete till this second atge is fullfilled. I paid the Bride Price and was happy to have done that, then there came along the issue about the White Wedding which is in these places taken to be favoured by God to just paying the Bride price. The prayers I seek from you are the prayers that, I get wed in the Western sense. A debate can ensue here on these grounds yet I am past that stage I am praying for the Providence for me to do this and have a good relationship with my in-laws.
Thanks for that question, this clears the vagueness I hope. As a matter of fact this confusion that you got did arouse an argument between the two families that we have brought together thus. This latter fact has prompted me to post the prayer request. I hope you all pray for me.
| 2005/10/6 2:38||Profile|
Yes, I have prayed from the first and will continue all the more.
It sounds so complicated and I wish I had an answer or some understanding, but GOD knows Everything, and he knows just exactly what the need is there and what can be done.
Somehow you two must be able to be joined in Peace and these two families give you some peace.
My heart goes out to you and I know "HIS" Heart is much-much bigger than mine.
Please keep us posted with any new News.
We are in the Palm of His Hand.
| 2005/10/6 5:03|
The prayers I seek from you are the prayers that, I get wed in the Western sense. A debate can ensue here on these grounds yet I am past that stage I am praying for the Providence for me to do this and have a good relationship with my in-laws.
I have many friends in your part of the world and have visited a few times too. The [url=http://azaz.essortment.com/africanmarriag_rntr.htm]'lobola'[/url] bride price is a difficult concept for westerners to understand. Please tell me if my understanding of the Zimbabwean version is mistaken.The bride price is paid by the husband-to-be, usually with the help of his family.
The bride price is set by the oldest brother of the bride's mother, but paid to the bride's father.
The bride price can be paid in installments but until the final installment is made the 'bride' (and any children) technically still belongs to the bride's father who may 'reclaim' them if the final payment is not made.It may surprise western Christians that there is much wisdom in this system and that it has some Biblical concepts in it. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; (Eph. 5:25, KJVS) In one sense Calvary was the 'lobola' (bride price).
I remember taking with a Zimababwean who had only just discovered that Western Christians did not have a lobola system. He asked an interesting question 'How does your wife know you love her if you have not paid a lobola for her?' The answer might be... I lay down my life for her each day... but it is a legitimate question just the same. The scriptures do not give a specifically 'Christian' marriage system. It often surprises Western Christians to discover that the idea of 'being in love' is not a biblical concept. 'Love' in the Bible, in this sense, is not something that 'happens to you' but a choice that you make. This is actually why the old English wedding ceremony does not ask 'do you love her?' but 'will you love her?' Romantic love was the invention of the Rennaisance and was usually an excuse for marital unfaithfulness; how can 'love' :-( be wrong?
I have two true stories from my African brothers which may serve to open Western eyes to non-Western concepts.The first was a schoolmaster who wanted to buy a radio. He had to save for it because it was more than he had. It took him two years to save sufficient for the radio and by that time the radio was no longer for sale. He told me this story himself and ended with the words "...the radio was no longer available so I took a wife".
The second came from my questioning a brother about the way in which 'lobola' works. I know that the lobola can often be a high price and that the bridegroom is usually helped by his family. Knowing that many families are poor I asked "if my sons wanted to marry how would I help them to get the money for the lobola?" He looked me straight in the eye, clearly surprised by my naivety, and said "the father has to have some daughters!"
I am telling these stories, not to mock my African brothers but to demonstrate to my Western brethren that our Western mind-set can often be a real barrier to communication; we need to remember that the Church of Christ is not Western, nor Eastern, nor African but is from heaven. In our discussions of these threads we surely need to keep in mind the whole church and not just our local experience of it. :-)
With regard to your formal Western style marriage, use it an an opportunity to give yourself and your wife to God in prayer that God will make your union fruitful and a source of glory to Christ and, as they sometimes say in emails, enjoy! The Lord bless and guide you in all your desire to walk in His paths.
Clicking on [url=http://azaz.essortment.com/africanmarriag_rntr.htm]'lobola'[/url] may help Western mind-set Christians to understand particularly why our brother asks for 'good relations with his in-laws'.
| 2005/10/6 5:17||Profile|
RonB, He said this custom came through Britian. What does that mean ?
And what on earth does all of this mean ?
""[u]The 'lobola' bride price is a difficult concept for westerners to understand.
It may surprise western Christians[/u] that there is much wisdom in this system and [u]that it has some Biblical concepts in it.
It often surprises Western Christians to discover that the idea of 'being in love' is not a biblical concept. 'Love' in the Bible, in this sense, is not something that 'happens to you' but a choice that you make.[/u]
I am telling these stories, not to mock my African brothers [u]but to demonstrate to my Western brethren that our 'Western mind-set' can often be a real barrier to communication;[i]
we need to remember that the Church of Christ is not Western, nor Eastern, nor African but is from heaven.[/i]
In our discussions of these threads we surely need to keep in mind the whole church and not just our local experience of it.
....Western mind-set Christians....""[/u]
Do you really for one second feel this prayer request thread merited patronizing part of The Body and for what motive ?
Who's dividing the "Church Universal" with statements like these ?
And to use someone's desperate prayer request for pompous condescending to fellow Christians occupying the same globe, to dispel 'our' ignorance .... how naive do you do think we are to believe that to be the motive behind all of this, when the slurs are so out in the open ?
How do you "unite" by "dividing" ?
It may surprise you, but Western (purposely leaving off the slur of "mind-set") Christians know the basic principles of a Dowry (that we 'know' was in our Bible) and also how to use Google.
Dear God, and they call some of us arrogant. Using desperate prayer requests now. Incredible.
Should I even ask, where have you been for all the other prayer requests on these pages ?
| 2005/10/6 7:26|
I am here because God wants me to be here. I will not ask Him for help to make any other sense out of all this. And I will not pray that he helps me settle a score that I know is not so. So Amen to all those who have prayed on my behalf and may the Lord bless them abundantly.
I never exactly had a fight in mind, if anything my mind is weary and I came here simply to get some Godly company and rest. If philologos' post did offend anyone, or mine at that, it is unfortunate but he did explain it in a manner that I thought would surely remove the confusion that is apparent in the post I responded to. We are devided by nature of what the Lord provided us with for our livelihoods, the Nations, the timezones, everything that makes some of us boast to be in America or loath to be in Africa. Yet yes Christ united us didn't he (Mat 28: 19) . I say kindly pray for me if you are given to it if it arouses demons in you may the Lord be for us.(Rom 8: 31)
In Jesus' name. So be it
| 2005/10/6 10:57||Profile|
I too thought Ron's post was very insightfull and appropriate to this thread. I will be praying that God blesses your marriage.
| 2005/10/6 11:01||Profile|
My apology to you brother Ropafadzo,
You did nothing to incite what has happened here.
Forgive me if I in any way gave you that impression.
God will bless you because you've come often here for prayer.
Again, with my apologies to you.
| 2005/10/6 11:04|