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TMK
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Joined: 2012/2/8
Posts: 5588
NC, USA

 Pastor resignation- looking for input

A pastor at a church I used to attend announced his resignation today. My sister still attends this church. I attended this church for about 9 years. We moved to another state. When I attended the current pastor who resigned was youth pastor and his 2 girls were very young.

A little side background- I noticed for the past year or so this pastor and his wife posting things on Facebook that I would call rather liberal theology, s well as some people who attend that church. It seemed a little strange because when I was there the church was pretty solid.

Anyways, today I was able to watch the service on line because I was told there was going to be an announcement so I was curious. I still know a lot of people in that church.

Essentially, the pastor said that he approached denominational leadership a couple of months ago and told them he could no longer agree with the doctrinal statement essentially stating that marriage is between a man and a woman, homosexuality is a sin, etc. He was told he could resign or be terminated, his choice.

He also said during his announcement that his 14 year old daughter is part of the LGBTQ spectrum. I guess this was common knowledge; I found out later that she does not want to identify with either sex. She is extremely intelligent science/math wise but does have some emotional issues. I gather she hangs with an unfortunate group of older kids(because she skipped a grade) who possibly consider themselves “woke” and endorse these alternative lifestyles. In my opinion a 14 year old knows nothing.

Now, I do have respect for this pastor for having the integrity to announce his resignation as he could not in good conscious endorse denominational positions.

But I am disappointed that instead of upholding plain biblical teaching on this issue, he chose to find other voices who try to make excuses for plain scripture or try to say the plain scriptures have been mistranslated or misinterpreted.

It also explains why I have seen his and his wife’s questionable social media posts I have seen over the past year.

So my question is what is a Christian parent to do if their early teens child comes and says they are homosexual or transgender or whatever? Is there a way to love your child without affirming their choice? I know in theory it can be done but in practice I don’t know how it would work. By the grace of God I did not have to deal with this regarding my own kids. In this case the daughter insisted on being called by a variant of her name that sounds neither male or female - “Li”.

It bothers me that this pastor and his wife immediately jumped to affirm her “choice” as biblical (They both should know better) rather than figuring out a different way to deal with it. But I don’t really know what the correct way looks like.


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Todd

 2020/8/2 17:25Profile
Jeremy221
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Joined: 2009/11/7
Posts: 1479


 Re: Pastor resignation- looking for input

Meet the daughters need without condoning her sin.
Show her truth by telling her the truth and repenting of any wickedness in your own life.
Seek the Lord for wisdom and grace to endure. Seek the Lord daily with tears.
Be prepared to suffer for the truth whether it’s the reproof of the world or of the child who may eventual cut you off completely.

Study 1 John and 1st and 2nd Peter until it’s embedded into your soul and God has transformed your seeing. Do you love your child as Christ loves the Church? That pastor certainly doesn’t.

 2020/8/3 2:35Profile
TMK
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Joined: 2012/2/8
Posts: 5588
NC, USA

 Re:

That is what’s so hard to understand. He is conforming to the child and the world which is exactly opposite of what we are told to do.


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Todd

 2020/8/3 8:55Profile
docs
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Joined: 2006/9/16
Posts: 2193


 Re:

That's a baffling set of events you are describing. I've often pondered why the current apostate church in many ways seems to have risen out of the true church - they went out from among us to show that they were not part of us. That type of thing. Not in all circumstances and examples, but in many. Is it possible that in some strange and hidden way that these people and pastors were never really saved in the first place but had just chosen a good profession of sorts? I don't know the answer or pretend to. These things baffle me also.

Blessings good bro.


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David Winter

 2020/8/3 10:24Profile
MrBillPro
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Joined: 2005/2/24
Posts: 3305
Texas

 Re: Todd

I always carry this scripture with me, because it says a lot about what will be happening in the later days.

2nd Timothy 3

3 But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.
6 They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, 7 always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth.

Todd, I wished I could elaborate more on your post, but I don't think I could possibly render any better thoughts than God did.


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Bill

 2020/8/3 11:19Profile
TMK
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Joined: 2012/2/8
Posts: 5588
NC, USA

 Re:

That scripture certainly applies Bill s well as the “tickling ears” passage.


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Todd

 2020/8/3 11:53Profile
Lysa
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Joined: 2008/10/25
Posts: 3417
This world is not my home anymore.

 Re: Pastor resignation- looking for input


Brother TMK,

The hour is fast approaching "for the word of God is living and effective and sharper than any double-edged sword, penetrating as far as the separation of soul and spirit, joints and marrow. It is able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart." (Heb 4:12)

Do you remember that man (pastor?) that was on here years ago that said this one verse in the Bible "proved" God approved of homosexuality? He had a son who tried to kill his self over his sexuality and he even wrote a book about it and had quite the following. He eventually left SI because he couldn't convert anyone on here.

Each one of us MUST 'receive the LOVE of the TRUTH... that we [and others] might be saved." (2 Thess 2:10-11ish)

We can love our child so much that we do not receive the love of the truth.
We can love our spouses so much that we do not receive the love of the truth.
We can love our own sin so much that we do not receive the love of the truth.
We can love our own life so much that we do not receive the love of the truth.

Pray for your former pastor to return to 'receiving the love of the truth.'

God bless you,
Lisa


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Lisa

 2020/8/5 21:16Profile
ccchhhrrriiisss
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Joined: 2003/11/23
Posts: 4526


 Re: Pastor resignation- looking for input

Interesting topic, TMK. I'll remember this entire family and church in prayer.

There is a church going through something somewhat similar (albeit an opposite situation) just a few miles from where I live. I've never visited that congregation, but I had heard of the church in the past.

The pastor of that church had three children: Two daughters and a son. The church was growing and the pastor was apparently well-known (I searched for his name on SermonIndex and there were five articles about him).

His oldest daughter went to a Christian college. She even appeared as a contestant on the game show "Jeopardy." However, she eventually got caught up into sin. She first announced that she was "gay" and later "transgender."

This girl eventually moved out and ties were cut with her family. She ended up "marrying" another extremely liberal LBGTQxyz activist woman. The other daughter became a writer. The son remained in the home (or near the home).

Apparently, the son confessed to his father (in private) that he had struggled with some sort of sinful attraction to minors. The family kept it quiet. Sometime later, the son began volunteering at the church (as well as with a local sports league).

That son had never been accused of any impropriety, moral failure or crime. According to various news outlets, it was a private admission of a struggle that he revealed to his father for prayer and counseling. They thought that this would have been the end of it.

Somehow, the transgender child of the pastor learned about this situation. She used it as ammunition to try and destroy her father's career.

This woman wrote and published a letter -- sending it to the church's board, the school district (where he worked) and the local police department.

She and her "wife" (an assistant professor of English at the University of California, Berkeley) also created a website to shame her family and church. Her goal? She said that her father needed to resign from the church.

She participated in numerous internet message boards and via social media. In all of these things, their words came across as vindictive against their father.

As the situation became known, the pastor took a leave of absence from the church. The board agreed with this decision. Later on, he went public with the situation to the church, admitted that his not revealing his son's confession to the church was unwise and rejoined the church at the pastor.

This angered and agitated the embittered daughter. She grew increasingly vocal with her attempts to embarrass and destroy her own father (and family). Oddly enough, her radical "wife" would try to appeal to "spirituality" while admitting that she's an atheist.

Last week, the pastor announced that he was resigning from the church (despite many parishioners who wanted him to remain). From the point of view of many people, it seemed like the oldest daughter had a personal vendetta against her father and family for not accepting her lifestyle.

In fact, the eldest daughter and her "wife" actually celebrated their "victory." Given the close-knit LGBTQxyz community that they are involved with, their followers and friends gleefully gloated over her father's resignation.

While reading through comments on Twitter and elsewhere, I noticed that if anyone who tried to correct them, they would be met by the LGBTQxyz echo chamber of mockery and vilification. They could be condescending and hateful about Christians. However, anyone who used similar arguments about homosexuality would be labeled a bigot by those same hateful individuals.

It seems like the price that must be paid in this day and age -- if you stand for truth -- can be enormous. Perhaps the pastor that you mentioned was unwilling to endure criticism or love God even more than his own child.

This entire debacle (with both ministers) reminds me of the song CONSIDER THE COST by Steve Camp:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUN1-iBJPes

Quote:

To obey is better than sacrifice
And the hearken than the fat of rams
For what will a man give for his own life
Houses or money or land?
There's a way that seems right to you
But in the end it leads only to death
But come unto Him all ye weary
Come and find your rest

Consider the cost of building a tower
It's a narrow way that you must come
For to do the will of the Father
Is to follow the Son
To love Him more than father or mother!
You will love Him more than even your own flesh!
To give all that you are, for all that He is
This is the gospel according to Jesus

Many will say "Lord, Lord" on that day
Look what we've done in Your name
"Oh, we've prophesied and performed many miracles
And Lord, even the demons obeyed"
Then He will will declare unto them
The most terrifying words of truth
He'll say "Depart from me ye workers of iniquity --
For I have never known you!"

Consider the cost of building a tower
It's a narrow way that you must come
For to do the will of the Father
Is to follow the Son
Will you love Him more than father or mother?
Will you love Him more than even your own flesh?
To give all that you are, for all that He is
This is the gospel according to Jesus

Oh, foolish man, how you built on the sand
Trusting in your goodness to save
For when the rains fall and the flood breaks the wall
You will be swept away
But blessed is he who builds on the Rock
Who takes Jesus as Lord to save
For when the rain falls, he will endure it all
Standing firm in His grace

Consider the cost of building a tower
It's a narrow way that you must come
For to do the will of the Father
Is to follow the Son
Will you love Him more than father or mother?
Will you love Him more than even your own flesh?
To give all that you are, for all that He is
This is the gospel according to Jesus

To give all that you are, for all that He is
This is the gospel according to Jesus



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUN1-iBJPes

Sometimes, the most difficult thing to do is the easiest -- to simply tell the truth. We must tell the truth -- THE Truth -- in face of all opposition. Even if it means losing the love of family members, friends or people that we don't want to lose, we must stand for Christ.


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Christopher

 2020/8/5 23:14Profile
TMK
Member



Joined: 2012/2/8
Posts: 5588
NC, USA

 Re:

Lysa and Chris-

I certainly agree with both of your comments. I was reading Ps. 91 yesterday and I guess that applies to situations like this as well as situations involving physical danger, which is how it generally is applied.

Lysa- I don’t remember that gentleman you reference at all. It may have been before my time here but I’ve been here a while.

I’ve never heard that song before by Steve Camp- the lyrics are amazing.

Chris- your post highlights a theme that I have been thinking about, namely to what extent should a parent(in the case you mention also a pastor) bear the blame for the way their children turn out? One of the qualifications for elders is to “manage his household well.” Does that mean the pastor in your example should be disqualified? (As an aside, he never should have allowed his son to work with youth in the church given his admission- that was a gross error in judgment in my opinion).

We all have heard a pastors kids who go astray- it’s almost a cliche. Certainly the devil has a hand in this.

But the parents cannot always be blamed- or can they?

And I struggle with the practical side of things- how do you deal with the daughter in the situation. I described? She’s only 14.


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Todd

 2020/8/6 7:38Profile
JFW
Member



Joined: 2011/10/21
Posts: 1436
Dothan, Alabama

 Re: it’s a spirit

Homosexuality is an unclean and perverse spirit that is readily discernible, even in a photo...

The pastor/father has total authority over it - the blood of Christ provides sufficiency. Perhaps he (dad) was unaware or was otherwise occupied...
That inhabitation by this unholy spirit took time to take root in this young lady, no matter how welcoming she might’ve been. Often this type enters in disguised as a comforting spirit in a time disparity, confirming the “right” to self-pity and the subsequent identity with it.
These spirits have no authority yet they deceive so as to garner a persons authority (autonomy) thru tricking them into yielding themselves to its promise of deliverance from perceived oppression or restrictions, due to rejection (usually by a father).
Fathers have an enormous responsibility before God to first themselves be wholly yielded to His direction and then to set not only an example but a context for their household. Everywhere the father/dad fails in this yielding unto the Lord, being stubborn or shortsighted, will be revealed as first hypocritical in himself and his service unto the Lord but also reflected in his children and all those whom abide under his covering.
I’ve seen this in my own household, wife and children....
But ALL PRAISE be unto God thru Christ Jesus for HE is faithful and has gone before and made escape thru repentance by the cross of Christ.
These deceiving spirits are subject and have no choice but to submit to the authority of Jesus, they flee instantly and can easily be bound.
James says, first submit yourself to the Lord then secondly to resist the devil and he WILL FLEE from you.

(My understanding) is that first receive the conviction and then respond with deep repentance allowing the Holy Spirit sway to do His work.
Then armor up, pray and fast, interceding before God continuously till this unclean spirit is broken, bound and cast out. No need to even address the daughter directly, she is an unwitting accomplice, rather go before the Lord of hosts and allow HIS authority to find seat of establishment in our heart and then His glory will shine forth dispelling the spirit of perversion.
So to be clear, don’t “react” to the presence of an unclean spirit by engaging with religion... rather “respond” to the Father in humble supplication. Jesus, Paul, Stephen, James, Peter all followed this narrow way, it’s right there for everyone to read/see 🙌🏽


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Fletcher

 2020/8/6 9:27Profile





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