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Discussion Forum : Miracles that follow the plow :  Ain't going "Back Again"

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Joined: 2003/6/11
Posts: 9192
Santa Clara, CA

  Ain't going "Back Again"

A dear brother who has been with us here for awhile and in some sharing this morning we were talking about our own personal testimonies.

Perhaps a good time to reflect once again where we have come from and out of, maybe just to regain some perspective, maybe the sense of awe and gratitude might be born anew.

Personally believe that testimonies can be just as powerful to those outside than often what we say, as it gives a glimpse into what has happened, not so much what we 'think' about things...

With his permission we copied this from another section...

Dear brothers and sisters,

this is heavy on my heart i pray for those who read it, so please read the following story, it's about private sin and repentance, and of what happened unto me last year, i want to share it with you brothers and sister, God's Spirit made me write it, so please open your heart to The Lord Jesus Christ...

it's called "Back Again"


it's getting late, and i'm bored .. i know i can spend time with God, but somehow, i don't want to... i don't want to, i want to have some time for myself....

i go outside, and walk around and go to the place, which i know to well, i know what this place has done to me in the past, but yet i decide to go, can i have some time on my own...

when i'm almost there, i can see the door, wide open ... and with a big welcome i make my entrance, and everywhere attractive temptations are coming to me, and yet i know so well i'm walking straight in to hell, but hé, "i'm here only for a little while", it can't be too bad, at least i have some fun ... and while i walk around i give in to temptations, because i want to have fun....

and it's so overwelming, it overflows me and clings unto me, i can't get rid of it, and for me it becomes hard to move around, i hear laughing and mocking voices, first i didn't listen to it, but now i hear those voices so clear....

my soul begins to cry out, i'm getting afraid, when i look at all the temptations, i see horrible, disguisting, filthy faces, it frightens me, i begane to cry out and scream, but their laughing and mocking is louder than i can cry out...

i want to get out, but no where an exit, "no can't be" where can i go, and everywhere the filthy horrible and disguisting faces of temptation, it clings unto me and they cling so tightly i can't get rid of it.... i cry out and scream for help, but where is it, where can i go, to whom can i go ...pain all over my body, and it's becoming worse, i feel like dying, can't breathe in this filthy place, gasping for breath i'm trying to find my way out, to get away from this place...

the all of a sudden, a whisper in my ear, a Voice, so gently, and it speaks unto me, and when i listen, i hear Him call out my name with love...when i look up, i see the exit, but someone is standing in front of it, He is blocking the exit...

when i run upto Him, and planning to break my way out, i hear Him call my name, He is calling out my name...and when i'm almost there, i stumble and fall on my face...i fall on my face for Him, and i just don't dare to look up, because of all the filthy, disguisting mess that clings unto me...and He just stands there with a Light that shines so bright i've to cover my eyes...

and He is calling out my name again, and He says: "Come, come with Me outside, i want to give you something" ...... i reply to Him by saying "but how, i'm so filthy, i just can't go outside, i want to, but i can't because of this filth"...but then again He says "come with Me, i want to show you something, show you what is real, but you have to trust Me"...

tears begane to roll down my cheeks, and when i look up, i see His Hand stretching out to me holding it very close, i look at His Hand, and see that it has been pierced, and He says "this Hand has been pierced for you, trust Me and I'll show you, what the Real life is"...i reply to Him and say "look at my filth, i'm unclean, how in the world can You give that to me"...He looks at me and says these words "do you want to trust Me?"


and when i'm fighting in my head, i see His Arm, still stretching out for mine, the nailed pierced Hand...and then in a whispering, of shame i say "yes, i want to trust You...". And now He takes me by the hand and makes me stand, now i'm looking at Him, looking straight in His eyes, Eyes full of love, and He takes me outside...and what happened now, i shall never forget...

the moment i stepped out of that door, He said "look at yourself", i looked at myself and, "wow..."i couldn't believe my eyes, and than on that moment He said "look up that Hill, what do you see?"...i replied "a Cross", He said "take a closer look"... and there it was al my filthy sin, lust and will, was hanging on that Cross"...than He continued "you saw My Hand, pierced, it's been pierced to wash you clean of all these filthy sin and fleshy lust, so what do you see when you look at yourself"

i looked at myself again, and i didn't recognised myself anymore, i'm looking different, i'm feeling different...Jesus looked at me and said "you are Mine, the old things are past away, that's on The Cross, behold everything has become new"..."I've forgiven your sins and pardoned your rebelion, you may live a life which I give to you, just keep trusting me and keep listening to My Voice only"

i felt at His feet, i cried, i cried like i've never cried before, tears full of joy, for what Lord Jesus had done unto me. When i looked back, i saw the place, the hell, full of filth, which ruined my life so much, and realised, Jesus saved me to set me free...not by my power or strength, or my own deeds, but His Mercy... i cried, and could only thank my Lord Jesus Christ, who saved me to set me free, and am going to obey Him...

Lord, i never want to go back again!


in Him


feel free to PM me

servant of The Most High


Edit: Couldn't figure out how to move the whole post over including all his information, but here is the original: [url=]Ain't going "Back Again"[/url]

Mike Balog

 2005/4/30 9:44Profile

Joined: 2005/2/21
Posts: 417
Edmonton Alberta Cda.

 Re: Ain't going "Back Again"

This is so true with most of us. We continue to return to the familiar, and He is there to rescue us.


 2005/4/30 9:57Profile

Joined: 2004/7/9
Posts: 315
The Netherlands


The God of Israel is still among us. Jesus Christ hasn't changed.

"For the LORD will ransom Jacob
and redeem them from the hand of those stronger than they.

They will come and shout for joy on the heights of Zion;
they will rejoice in the bounty of the LORD—
the grain, the new wine and the oil,
the young of the flocks and herds.
They will be like a well-watered garden,
and they will sorrow no more." (Jeremiah 31:11-12)


"Do not be afraid of the king of Babylon, whom you are now fearing; do not be afraid of him,' declares the LORD, 'for I am with you to save you and deliver you from his hand." (Jeremiah 42:11)

This is our God...our Redeemer, Deliverer. These verses have always been a great encouragement to me in my struggle with sin. They've also been a warning, for Jeremiah 42:11 continues...just read that for yourselves. I now only want to praise God for this brother and praise Him for who He is.

Cleansed by the blood of the Lamb,


 2005/4/30 10:50Profile

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