Hey guys sorry I waited so long to respond. I truly appreciate your concern for me and your prayers and wisdom. The past week I have got better and a few times I was encouraged by the word of God and I believe by His Spirit. I have done a few things physically to help myself like cutting out caffeine for the most part I was drinking coffee way to much. I also have been taking 5htp,bcomplex, multivitamin and vitamin c on a daily basis and these things have helped a little for my anxiety, but still the spiritual struggles are still their even taking those just mind is more calm. I bought a Bible promise book and a devotional. Also I have been praying a lot and seeking the Lord in the word more. But, i know it is far from over. But, to what you guys commented on. The way i think God thinks and feels about me especially the past year and the last few years ago is that he might love me, but has rejected me because of my sin in the past and i feel as if he is not coming back to me because i began to believe you can lose your salvation the past few years so that is kind of where i struggle with how God views me, but at the same time I am trying to believe that he has forgiven since i confessed my sin. That is my only hope that through Christ all my sins can be forgiven and that is what i am trying to stand on right now. Brothers your testimonies of the oppression from the devil I definitely understand how hard it is and I think that it makes sense that i need to seek God about what is causing all of this oppression and i specifically been praying about that and i am trying to figure what exactly is the issue. But, hey i really appreciate your guys wisdom and i hope i take it and use it.

Hey, guys you know I have had a few days of hope since I first posted this prayer request and I have been doing a little better and been still seeking the Lord and as I been examine myself and knowing how bad my thoughts have been the past few years and how they are now I just know my heart is not right with God or man. Their is not much love in my heart and Ijust have a wicked heart. I am a very selfish person and I know this and I have confessed these inner struggles of my heart with the Lord so many times, but my heart hasn't got any better. I desire the Lord so much I just want to be delivered can you please keep me in prayer for deliverance from my sins.

Brother John,
You need to not keep looking to your self and your sins. Repent of your sins and die to self and then keep looking to God.

The Devil wants you to keep looking at these things so that your eyes are off God. So that you look down instead of up. Do not listen to him. Repent of your sins, then forget about them.

"Who is a God like You, who pardons iniquity And passes over the rebellious act of the remnant of His possession? He does not retain His anger forever, Because He delights in unchanging love. He will again have compassion on us; He will tread our iniquities under foot. Yes, You will cast all their sins Into the depths of the sea." Micah 7:18-19

Blessings Steve

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Steve

There is now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who walk after the Spirit and not after the flesh.

To be carnally minded is death.

Keep these in mind, brother. Any of us would admit that we, on our best days, are really no better than we are on our worst. There is none righteous. We will never arrive. We are, like Paul said, pressing toward the mark of the prize of the high calling of God in Jesus Christ.
So, the fact that you feel as if you should have arrived somehow is condemnation on yourself. It is an expectation of a righteousness that really is not. So, as the Scripture urges you, "walk in the Spirit" and "do not mind the things of the flesh". Do not attend to them, even when they loom large as beams in your own eye. See them, confess them, be honest before and to God, and then keep running toward that mark. You are burdened with many things. Choose the better thing that will not be taken from you. Set aside those besetting, sidetracking things -- however frequently they may present themselves -- and keep running the race with patience. You are not alone. Many witnesses cheer you on, so to speak, hoping for you, convinced of better things for you concerning salvation.

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Tim

Brother, if Jesus be God, and He died for u. That's enough to know that every sin can be pardoned. If God does not want to pardon u, he won't even let u know that u're a sinner. Now if God said in his word that he will forgive those that repent and confess, u had been the greatest blasphemer to think God has not forgiven. And if u're not sure whether u've repent then do this. Wake up in the morning and say:GOD i repent today. And just for today. Yesterday is gone, and i'm not sure of tomorrow, i'm even afraid that i may fall before noon, but lord for now that i'm talking to u, i'm a christian, and in this i rejoice.
People question me when i tell then about my salvation story. I was walking the road one day my mind was troubled as to whether God will accept me, i got angry and told God, God whether u like it or not i'm ur child from today. That was all, i had no feeling, no assurance, but kept doing all a christian should do. And today the testimony of the grace of God, the gifts of the spirit, and a blessed assurance overflows in me. Is not whether God want to accept u or not, is whether u want to accept his mercy and love or not.

Is there something that you think God is telling you to do, or something you have to make right, such as paying a debt back, or an apology, or anything else? Because such things can keep us out of God's presence, even though He is more willing to commune with you than you are with Him. I have struggled with virtually the same problems for quite some time now, and I know the only answer is obedience; do ANYTHING He tells you; I have had to pay back some people I owed money to, and make some very awkward apologies. But every time I do one of these things, I know I am doing God's will. Be encouraged, and don't listen to the enemy's voice that God has abandoned you. He is more loving and patient than you can imagine.

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Nigel Holland

Bible4life,

1. First off - I wanna encourage you by saying that there are many Christians who have struggled with similar issues (including myself), some of whom have shared their journey here on this forum. So there is definitely a way out, and there is hope for you.

2. From your previous two posts in this thread, it is clear that:

(i) Your image of God our Father needs healing. You are not seeing Him as the loving Father that He is.

(ii) You don't know who you are in Christ. You are not rooted in your TRUE identity in Him, nor are you rooted in His love.

If you think that God has rejected you, and that you are currently subjected to His condemnation - how could you possibly feel good, or have the confidence to approach Him?

Likewise - if you feel that you're barely hanging onto God, always on the verge of falling into the abyss of perdition, how could you possibly be happy in your Christian journey?

3. You need to know the truth, and the truth will set you free.

If the joy and peace promised by Jesus remains elusive to you, that's probably a symptom of deeper underlying issues - such as having wrong ideas about God, poor grasp of the gospel, not understanding the purpose of the law, et cetera. Obviously major parts of your theology have not been doing you much good all these years! (for me - I was finally ready to do a massive re-evaluation of my theology after my life collapsed twice)

The good news is that Christ wants to impart the truth to you. Ask Him to open your eyes to the truth, and teach you to renew your mind with the truth.

4. On sin - you will never get anywhere focusing on sin, or trying to overcome it on your own. That's because that is contrary to the method appointed by God - THAT ONE WAY IS JESUS.

Someone once made a very perceptive comment: "Much focus on sin can be veiled idolatry of self. We keep looking to ourself for something that can only come from Christ (forgiveness, righteous standing, life to change) - something that comes dangerously close to, or is, self-worship."

Stop focusing on sin, your weakness and failures - and start focusing on Jesus! Focus on the fact that He loves you perfectly, fully accepts you, and is hugging you!!!

5. There are many good resources out there. However, it is true that the Bible in itself is sufficient. The book of Romans is pretty much the definitive guide on Christian living, but we can miss the message because we are understanding it through our paradigm, not God's. So other resources can assist us in grasping what God is really saying through His Word.

I suggest that you pick up Bill Gillham's "Lifetime Guarantee" - http://amzn.to/1vgOP7G It's a very down-to-earth, practical book on living the Christian life, renewing your mind and enjoying God's love. The author has a background in psychology, and his communication style reflects that - simple and lucid.

I'm not sure if his theology is 100% correct, but the core of the book is definitely correct. Just pray for God's discernment and guidance as He teaches you the truth.

Also - you might want to start affirming God's truths out loud. Our minds have a habit of drifting all over the place... the mind might start dwelling on our feelings, on our failures, on the past, on statements contrary to what God says. Reciting them out loud will help you to focus on God's truth.

The Gillhams have daily devotionals on their website at http://lifetime.org You might want to check out this entry - it offers practical advice on how to renew your mind with the truth: http://www.lifetime.org/2014/09/being-close/

Bible4life, I recommend Breaking Up Your Fallow Ground by Charles Finney. Here is the link:
http://www.lastdaysministries.org/Groups/1000087752/Last_Days_Ministries/Articles/By_Charles_G/Breaking_Up_the/Breaking_Up_the.aspx

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Nigel Holland

I would strongly recommend NOT reading the article linked to by Finney. It is focusing on sin and self, not on Christ and will most likely lead to greater despair and condemnation. Bible4life, you need realize what Christ has already done for you, he's already forgiven all your trespasses and sins! If you haven't accepted Christ then do it! But if you have, then give no place to the devil! He will constantly work to get you to doubt your salvation. Resist the devil and he will flee from you!

Accepting Christ means you no longer rely on your own righteousness or lack thereof, you are justified in God's sight by Jesus!

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Andrew

praying