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Joined: 2011/1/12
Posts: 1378
Lakeland FL



by murrcolr on 2012/6/21 8:51:15

Deadn Quote: Your post reminds me so much of my deep thoughts before I had died inside.

Please explain what you mean?

I shared some of that in my previous post.
I was a passionate Christian back in the 90's but during the year of 1998 a number of incidents happened in dealing with church people that caused me to become so disillusioned with Christianity that In December of that year I died inside. I consciousely shut myself of to anything dealing with God which including church, bible, media. The reason reason for DEADn (deaden) because I still struggle inside with God.

Thus, the original posters words causes my memories of the past to be brought up and I reflect on them.

I can't say I am as passionate as I used to be because I am not. I am still sorting out where my heart is in relation to God. Many times I feel as if I may be a Deist in heart and hearing some of the voices in Christianity really doesn't help my cause.

Does that help?


 2012/6/21 14:31Profile

Joined: 2007/4/25
Posts: 1565
Scotland, UK


There was a time a just before I left the church that I was angry not just at the christians but at God because of what I saw in church.

I still don't have any other contact with other christians apart from on here.

I would say I am not as passionate either but I would say that I am stronger because all battles I have fought since leaving the church I have had only him to put my trust in and I can say he has never let me down. Things haven't gone all my way but I know he will always lead me me in the right path even when I was shutting him out. I now see the time I spent in the church as positive thing as it was God's will for me at the time to see and experience those things.

You can't just get up on a platform and preach the message, you must live that message, you must be the message and that's what I see he is doing in my life.

Making me into a message...

Thanks for being honest.

Colin Murray

 2012/6/23 18:50Profile

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