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Joined: 2005/1/6
Posts: 1849
Hemel Hempstead

 Dancing at weddings

John 2
1 And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: 2 And both Jesus was called , and his disciples, to the marriage. 3 And when they wanted wine, the mother of Jesus saith unto him, They have no wine. 4 Jesus saith unto her, Woman, what have I to do with thee? mine hour is not yet come . 5 His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it. 6 And there were set there six waterpots of stone, after the manner of the purifying of the Jews, containing two or three firkins apiece. 7 Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water. And they filled them up to the brim. 8 And he saith unto them, Draw out now, and bear unto the governor of the feast. And they bare it. 9 When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine, and knew not whence it was : (but the servants which drew the water knew ;) the governor of the feast called the bridegroom, 10 And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk , then that which is worse: but thou hast kept the good wine until now.

I find it so hard to dance at weddings as I am a good dancer. I struggle with the secular songs and find the music hard. I dont know what to do.

Dominic Shiells

 2012/3/31 20:16Profile

 Re: Dancing at weddings

I liked your post, Brother Dom. Who's getting married?
I've been to Christian and Jewish weddings where they danced like the Jewish folks do at weddings and I've been to the Italian style weddings of my family members also.
I like Italian weddings. They seem to be a lot like Jewish weddings.
I tell ya what - you can dance, but only if you get a video of it and post it here. How's that? :)
I think weddings are supposed to be a big and beautiful celebration. Just pick a song that doesn't have lyrics in it that offend you.
We make exceptions for weddings 'round here.
JMO :) Or maybe I should say, JMCO?

GOD Bless you!!

 2012/3/31 22:12

Joined: 2009/8/31
Posts: 416
Ohio USA

 Re: Dancing at weddings

Not a good thing to dance. I remember the many temptations that would come to me and I would cry to God for help. It dawned on me one day: Why put myself in a position of touching a woman who was not my wife and listening to sensual music? Can I really expect God to help me when I put myself in that situation? Many of the great preachers of the past cried out against the dance. Also, Paul said if something is doubtful, it is sin and needs to be avoided.


 2012/3/31 23:35Profile

Joined: 2005/6/18
Posts: 1481


hi, why not have instumental music if you are a good dancer?fox trot and waltz or quick step or other dances are not at all sensuous and difficult to do well so you conscentrate on the dancing. music is only 7 notes with sharps and flats and without words it can be wonderful . belly rubbing is not dancing or anything else vulgar is acceptable. if God says you can ,you can... and if He tells you no than it is is simple and much ado about nothing for me.jimp

 2012/4/1 0:46Profile

Joined: 2011/7/29
Posts: 683
northern USA

 Re: Dancing at weddings

QUOTE: I find it so hard to dance at weddings as I am a good dancer. I struggle with the secular songs and find the music hard. I dont know what to do."

Is it going to be a live band? Cuz if so, then you can often
request a song. If it is a rock band, maybe you could have a list of clean, danceable oldies in mind to run by them. I can't recall if Elvis did a wedding song or not but he did some slower stuff at times. Love Me Tender would be too slow even for a waltz, however. There are many other oldies that are ok.

 2012/4/8 5:54Profile

Joined: 2011/1/12
Posts: 1378
Lakeland FL



Your post concerns me because your thoughts. You must have a great struggle with lust? Do you lust every time you see a woman? Or is it only when you touch a woman?

When you say putting yourself in position to touch a woman(who is not your wife) and listening to sensual music- what exactly does this mean? It sounds to me as if you A. have some deep issues to work through in which you are weak. B. fundamentalism has put a deep mental fear in you to say that these things are flat wrong.

I am not a great dancer but if I dance with someone who knows how to dance I can do it. If my wife and I are dancing and we bump into another couple and I touch the lady I am not lusting after her. It is an OOPS moment and both couple give each other space and we may joke with each other. I have danced the polka with my girl cousins before and torn up the floor while bumping into others at time.

Males are gripped more by lust than females are but we endanger ourselves by being so focused on this concept that at every turn we have the 'lust' demon in our eyes. This creates a fundamentalism in us. Soon we began calling aspects of women evil because how they affect our own emotions and then we put them (women) in a cage. Look at the Muslim community.

how often does a person condemn themselves because they suddenly had a lustful thought? How many times do men condemn themselves and throw in the towel over it? Well, if the focus is that great than the man really has internal issues much like a child molester has some serious issues. There are exceptions to this but looking on the whole if we are very weak in this area then just avoid these areas but don't put yourself in a position where 'lust' demons are controlling you and then a fundamentalist spirits pounces on you. I thought we are free in Jesus?

Great preachers cried out against the dance? Is this because they preached fundamentalism? Did they take some circumstances and lump it all together to say dancing is ungodly? I know preachers will use scripture to promote that dancing is ungodly but it can be used to say the opposite as well. All in the point of view.

This topic pushes my buttons because, in my view, puts religious fundamentalism in neon lights and brings out things we should FEAR and bring forth LAWS and kicks out freedom because of do's and don'ts.

JB- the post is not a total direct aim at your. It is only in regard to your words but then it goes out to others who are of similiar mind.


 2012/4/8 10:56Profile

Joined: 2009/2/20
Posts: 494
Celina, Texas

 Re: Dancing at weddings

Our lives are one great communion are they not? In all things do we look for the glory that is Gods. I cannot say I fully understand the opening post in what is being communicated but it does in fact allow that which is supposed to be a union ordained to be examined a little more closely by the light in which we live.

What a beautiful picture is the wedding representing our union to Christ. Yes it has been made so many things that are not reflective of this relationship but it is still by example a wonderful picture of the blessed union. The dance between a husband and his wife, two laying down their lives to serve each other so that they may better serve Him for whom they are truly united in a marriage covenant of eternity. Is this dance not a brilliant witness of such a beautiful reality. Does it get more romantic? Yes, both dances, the spiritual and the physical.

In like vein, isn't a funeral about the best get together the saints could attend? Granted we will attend many a funeral that is a lie and deception. I can't think of anything more tragic than attending a celebration of life for the one who has rejected Christ. On the other hand, what a grand joy and testimony of the saint that pointed to Christ in life and in death. Yet should the joyous funeral, that is the going away party of the Saint, be spoiled by the majority of those that are no more than a great deception? I hope not. All is a testimony to the life of our precious Lord and Savior both in life and death.

 2012/4/8 12:06Profile

Joined: 2011/1/12
Posts: 1378
Lakeland FL


I am curious to know if dancing zumba would be considered an ungodly act by those who adhere to fundamental doctrine?
Yesterday, I saw a flash mob on video at Trinoma mall in Quezon City which is the northeast section of Manila. They did zumba starting off with 2 girls and it grew and grew. I wondered what christians would consider this dance of the flesh and ungodly.


 2012/4/10 16:08Profile


I think the appropriate thing to ask is do YOU find it fleshly and ungodly?

If you are walking with Christ and in the Word daily then the Holy Spirit will lead you. If you see nothing wrong with it, then dont worry about. If you do, or you have a doubt, dont partake.

The problem comes in when we ask other believers about something that may be benign. The immature Christians will either be all for something worldly, or they may be the polar opposite and see a devil in everything.

I dont know what Zumba is, but lets say to your eyes you see nothing wrong with it. It doesnt cause you to lust or entertain impure thoughts. Wonderful. Enjoy. But along comes a Christian who may struggle with lust at a much deeper level than you, and their mind goes there no matter what. They tell you their opinion... and then you never can look at Zumba the same again. They have soiled it for you.

The Bible says: Titus 1:15 "To the pure all things are pure, but to those who are defiled and unbelieving nothing is pure; but even their mind and conscience are defiled."

So when you saw this... where did your mind and spirit go? Ask this of yourself. Ask God to speak to you about it. He will, and if you're honest with yourself about the prompting of the Holy Spirit... you will know.


 2012/4/11 6:52

Joined: 2005/5/2
Posts: 3777


Ask God to speak to you about it. He will, and if you're honest with yourself about the prompting of the Holy Spirit... you will know.

Wonderful advice, Krispy! Regarding the many questionable influences always before us, it is assuring to have the Spirit guide us each step of the way. Of course God is concerned not only about our own purity – but also about our participation in the lives of others: “Consider the interest of others...” I'd say: Taking the time to think about others in a situation like the wedding dance - and seeking to minister into their lives may even help liberate us from impure preoccupations (or fear, or whatever self-focus).

A wedding is an invitation to celebrate a new relationship. It’s unfortunate that so many young couples (and their parents) feel the need to do what everybody else does, not just the dance, but a lot of other trappings. Well… we can’t change that, but we can be countercultural in our way of honouring the young couple and upholding the institution of marriage itself. Also the guests can be blessed by our presence and our engagement with them – perhaps some wee chats. In this respect, there is no end of possibilities – even during a dance event. As far as dancing – well, after a big meal – surely the chicken dance can benefit your health. And when older people get up and dance with the younger ones – well – imagine what that says to the kids who are normally quite ostracized from them. Having fun with others, rejoicing with them in their joy, may actually be quite pure I would say. Would you?



 2012/4/11 8:40Profile

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