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 Three Tips for Husbands and Wives by Zac Poonen


I want to say three things about loving one another.

1. Love expresses appreciation: There is a whole book on married love that God has included in the Bible – the Song of Solomon. All married couples should read that book – to each other! It’s amazing to see there how Almighty God expects a husband and wife to talk to each other! And that book is inspired Scripture just as much as the other books in the Bible!

Let me read you a few extracts from this book, so that we can all learn to appreciate each other as husbands and wives. We are all misers when it comes to expressing appreciation. We are quick to criticize, but very slow to appreciate. We look at people and find so many faults in them. That is human nature. And that is how the Accuser, the Devil gets a foothold within us. On the other hand, God gets a foothold within us, when we look at others and find something to appreciate in them. Each of us can examine our own conduct here.

See what the husband says to his wife here in Song of Solomon (from various verses in the Message Bible):

“You're beautiful, my dear love, from head to toe - beautiful beyond compare and absolutely flawless. You’re as lovely as the ravishing visions of my ecstasy. Your voice is soothing and your face is ravishing. Your beauty, within and without, is absolute, my dear friend. You’re a paradise.” “You've captured my heart. You looked at me, and I fell in love. One look my way - and I was hopelessly in love! My heart is raptured. Oh the feelings I get when I see you and the stirrings of desire I have. I'm spoiled for anyone else!”. “There is no one like you on earth, there never has been, and there will never be. You are a woman beyond compare.”

And now listen to what the wife says. This is her response: “And you, my dear lover are so handsome! You are one in a million. There's no one like you! You’re golden – you’re a rugged mountain of a man. Your words are warm and re-assuring. Your words are like kisses and your kisses are all words. Everything about you delights me. You thrill me through and through! I long for you and I want you desperately. Your absence is painful for me. When I see you, I will throw my arms around you and hold you tight. And I won’t let you go. I am yours alone and you’re my only lover and you’re my only man.”

2. Love is quick to forgive. Love is slow to blame but quick to forgive. There will be problems between husband and wife in every marriage. But if you put those problems on the back-burner, they are sure to boil over (That is, if you give those problems a LOW priority – instead of settling them immediately – then those problems will get worse). So be quick to forgive and be quick to ask for forgiveness. Don’t wait until the evening to do that. If you get a thorn in your foot in the morning, you will take it out immediately. You won’t wait until the evening. If you hurt your spouse, you poked him/her with a thorn - take it out immediately - ask for forgiveness immediately, and be quick to forgive.

3. Love is eager to do things together with one’s partner – and not alone: How different the history of man would have been, if when the Devil came to tempt Eve in the garden, she had just said “Let me consult my husband first before I take a decision”. Oh, what a different story it would have been then! Remember that all the problems in the world arose because one woman took a decision on her own, when God had given her a companion whom she could have consulted, before taking that decision. True love does things together. Two are always better than one.


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SI Moderator - Greg Gordon

 2011/11/18 11:47Profile
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 Re: Three Tips for Husbands and Wives by Zac Poonen


Wonderful biblical advice from our brother Zac.


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SI Moderator - Greg Gordon

 2011/11/18 13:58Profile
dietolive
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Joined: 2007/6/29
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 Re: sermonindex

Quote:
"Wonderful biblical advice from our brother Zac."

Yes it is.

Oh God, give us grace to always remember these things, that we may walk with our wives "according to knowledge."

Thanks for sharing Brother,
Doug

 2011/11/18 14:02Profile
ginnyrose
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Joined: 2004/7/7
Posts: 7534
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 Re: Three Tips for Husbands and Wives by Zac Poonen

Beautiful!

Point: #2: Scripture also says one is not to allow the sun to go down on your wrath. The point is do not go to bed upset or angry with your spouse! Confront the offense and deal with it before bedtime! Yes, forgiveness is learned in the home, first between husband and wife and then between the parents and children. Woe to any child who has not learned this in the home.

#3: Yes, it is fun to do things with your spouse. Working together has a way of showing up ones strengths and weaknesses. You learn fast that they complement, like a puzzle. It is cooperation at its best. Both of us learn to sympathize with the other's problems and work to fix what needs fixing.

Thanks for posting this, Greg.


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Sandra Miller

 2011/11/19 11:58Profile





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