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 2011/9/7 9:06

Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


Codek after reading through some of your replies I realize there is little I can say to you right now, you seem determine in your heart and attitude towards GOD so again I will just pray for you. Some of my darkest times in my life, some of my deepest struggles, some of the times I have felt the most alone have been when my focus was on "self" and not on JESUS...

I will be in prayer for you

 2011/9/7 9:08Profile

Joined: 2011/8/5
Posts: 23


Forgive me for anything i have said that may have upset you. I love you with a Christ like love. I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts. I hope that it all works out for you. Remember Jesus loves you. sorry if i did more harm than good.

Luke L.

 2011/9/7 9:12Profile



although it was a reply to your post, you did nothing wrong. I'm sorry for going crazy but that's how desperate I became. I'm just very very very very frustrated to the point i want to die, no joke. I won't commit suicide but you get my drift.

thank you for your prayers. if I'm mad at anyone, it would be God, not any of you who try to help me. God sits there and says absolutely nothing.

 2011/9/7 9:34



Thank you. I don't know how to focus on Jesus. I thought I was doing that and that's why I'm getting so desparate. I have no real christians around me. What I know about God is learned through sermons, online forums, etc. The christians in my life are lukewarm christians who go to church for social reasons. None of them are saved. I don't know why I'm the only one of the people around that realize that something is wrong with the modern church today. I don't even know how i realized it. But ever since i realized it, my journey has been the toughest ever, i'm getting no breaks. I don't know what's going on.

 2011/9/7 9:40



I don't have what it takes to go through whatever this is. pick someone else.

I don't want to go on sermonindex anymore and complain and whine about how you don't say crap and how you never even talk to me.

The people here are decent people, let me leave them alone.

this is stupid.

God, say, do something.

 2011/9/7 9:53

Joined: 2011/2/7
Posts: 47
Central Iowa


I understand I have been where you are at more than once.
I think from your discussion we must live fairly close to each other. I have one question for you coming from what I have read of your postings, Do you hear God's voice speaking to you? For me it is down in my chest or to my spirit so to speak. If you don't then ask Him to speak to you. Remember the Word if you ask Him for bread He will not give you a stone.
You need to hear His voice in this day and age that we live in to be able to endure until the end.
On the matter of "None of them are saved." That is for God to decide. We are to judge but for one thing and that is whether or not someone is going to hell.

Remember also it is much tribulation that we shall enter into the Kingdom.

Please don't give up you are not alone you can contact me offline if need be. I've been walking with Him for over 30 years and have experienced that same things you are going through. I've been down to one cardboard box, I've been locked out of the house by my own family members. I understand the IHOP situation and concur and there are many others just like them.

If you truly want to be follower of Jesus this is going to be that hardest thing you will ever do, don't let anyone tell you the path is easy and the road is wide.

Robert Richtsmeier

 2011/9/7 10:10Profile

Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


codek there was a point in my life where things were very low. I will not bother with all the details because in all truth they don't matter, what does matter is that I can tell you in that moment JESUS met me there. I was lost, completely in darkness and HE came for me. Now perhaps JESUS is stripping you of every thing, every single thing in your life so that all that will remain is you and will you respond? I do not ask you this to make lite of what you are going through. I ask to give you something to think about, if at the end of today all you have left is the shirt on your back, you find yourself sitting on the street with out even a card board box to shelter you, iF you find yourself completely abandoned by all around you and you are cut off, alone and yet you still have HE enough for you? IF at the end of this day all you have is JESUS is that enough for you? How will you respond when there is nothing left but you and HIM?

I will pray that you will be able to focus on JESUS and not so much on self, HE truly is worthy!

God bless

 2011/9/7 10:25Profile

Joined: 2006/5/22
Posts: 2669
Nottingham, England


You said you read the Bible? Ever read this?

Ephesians 6v16, 'above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the firey darts of the wicked one.'

Remeber him? The wicked one, satan?

He is just poisioning your mind against God. And don't think he hasn't done the same to many, if not all who visit this site.

Doesn't Jesus tell us he was a liar from the beginning? Doesn't Jesus also tell us, that he is a thief, and that
he comes to steal, kill and destroy? John 10v10.

And it began in Genesis 3 when the serpent got Eve to doubt God's word with one simple sentence, 'Has God indeed said?' And, as we know, she fell for it.

I hope and pray you don't do the same. How is it we can trust the words of men, but the word of God we seem to question?

If it's an emotional experience you want, it might not happen.

Regardless of feelings, cling to the word. There is hope.


 2011/9/7 10:41Profile

Joined: 2011/8/20
Posts: 1767

 There is a place in his kingdom

To the Codek,

There was a stage in my life when I hit the rock bottom of self esteem and I felt I am not called by him. Then I asked lord to tell me frankly whether I have a place in his kingdom or not. And then he showed me John 14-1
“Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God[a]; believe also in me. 2 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4 You know the way to the place where I am going.”
So if there is no room for me in his kingdom Jesus would have told me straight to my face that there is no place. But there is that is why he dint tell me there is no room. Same is the case with you, there is place in God's Kingdom for you and that is why Jesus has not said no to you yet. After God showed me that verse I got so much encouraged that there is a place for me and I just need to live worthy of it.
Codek, this Christian life is not just for reaching heaven. If only reaching heaven and escaping hell is your goal you will never become like Christ. Instead focus on Christ and ask God to fill with Holy Spirit to reflect Christ's glory on earth. He will do it for sure. He did not do it till now to you because your interest to reach heaven is much higher than Christlikeness. Change your priorities and God will change you.
Calvinism is not a solution at all, it will only turn you away from God or make you wait indefinitely for load to change you.
See when Jesus converted water to Vine he first asked the servants to fill the jars with water and then he did the miracle of turning it to wine. So there is a small human element involved in our holy christian life which cannot be neglected. If you become a Calvanist you will never do that human task and God will never be able to convert an empty Jar to Jar filled with Vine.
Also you need to understand brokenness and that is what God is leading you now into. I can explain you about this if you are willing to know. Please email me at [email protected] if you are interested to know about brokenness which is a wonderful gift that I see God giving you but you have not accepted it now.


 2011/9/7 10:49Profile

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