It has been a week of honesty and confession before God and man here on SI. I have been moved by the honesty and genuineness of many that love and fear God but who have not responded as they should when the voice spoke within them. I am glad that some who have had no place to turn have turned here, though it is sad that for one reason or another there have been few to none outside this site for some to confess to.

So this is my confession since I am moved by the those who love God more than they love themselves and would make of themselves nothing for His sake.

Yesterday attending a function, I was told by a representative for a couple I worked with for eight months, that the husband had died. His name was Paul. Eight years ago When I finished the project for Paul and his wife, I talked at length with him about intelligent design as well as the Designer. This was Paul's field of specialty. To convince those poor pitiful souls that held onto such a fairy tale that they needed to awake to reality. He told me if he had enough time, he would turn me into an atheist also. He smiled the whole time we talked as though he knew a secret and could scarcely keep it to himself. Even in my clumsiness he seemed to move position a little from atheist to agnostic. The wall of the uncaused cause is a wall no man can assault nor scale successfully. Paul gave me a giant book on evolution and I said good night. I would never read it and it sits today in my library amongst the cults.

I was religious in that day yet unsaved. I ruled my life and God had a place, but He was relegated to my convenience. I would pass by Paul's home many a time. Even having come to Christ five years later, I would still occasionally pass by his home, aware that there was a man inside who had stood face to face with me and knew not God. Now I had the answer. Now I had the life, but I never stopped to talk to him about it? I would think of him often. What should I say to him? How do I break the ice after so many years? I had no excuse. I knew his condition. One day. One day.

The day finally came yesterday. Not as I expected. I knew his day would eventually come but I had always pacified myself by thinking that I would find the right opportunity to talk to him. I lied to myself and believed it. I don't believe I would have ever talked to him again. I liked the man. He was okay but there was a little intimidation. Heaven forbid I be made the fool. That is the truth.

Paul loved evolution. Who does not who has bought into the pride of life? His words to me were that God couldn't be known, whoever that God might be. Paul would never have believed that he would be a first hand recipient of Intelligent design. God has made things of such wonder throughout the Universe. The power of the stars, the vastness of the galaxies, the magnitude of earthquakes, the raging waters of the sea, the devastation of drought. All things by His hand, and not by chance. Paul will now reside in eternity in a place of intelligent and specific design. Like the other parts of creation it is awesome in its creativity. It is made perfectly for those for whom it is deserved. For those whose center is themselves, they will have themselves as company throughout eternity. A fitting and ironic sentence. My mind cannot go to its horrific setting no more than it can the other extreme in the magnificence of the Son's Kingdom. O for Paul that God were not who He is. That Christ were just a mere man so that the crime would not be so heinous, but this is not to be. Paul will now come to learn this forever. Christ is more than can be fully grasped for He is fully God. I believe this will be taught but never fully realized and it will be unbearable in it's teaching by a wrathful God who has perfect love for His Son. So Paul will be in a place for eternity that will not afford me a second chance at evangelism. Maybe it is that Paul has reminded me so much of my Dad that it has hit home so hard. Will I bury my Dad this same way? One day?

Brother, we'll be praying for your Dad.
Would you pray for mine as well.

Bless you!!

Sobering testimony. Will pray for both your dads. Please pray for mine as well. May we be ready to hear the Lord directing us to whoever He would send us to. There's much I don't understand, but I know it starts with our ears being open to the Lord with a readiness to obey, as that's the one thing needful (Luke 10:38-42). He alone knows the right timing and the exact words that need to be said/scriptures to use; as well as when it is better to pray and let Him speak through others, through circumstances, etc.

Lyle,

God knows your heart and he knows Paul's as well. Ultimately each individual will have to give account for himself and cannot rightly blame another for his choices. Paul was not ignorant - he just chose to relegate God to the fringes. He made that choice. Sometimes the devil will work to make YOU feel like the guilty one.

God will allow you to experience this grief - Solomon says it it better to go to the house of mourning then the house of feasting....ever consider why this is so? Think about that...I think that is where you are at the moment. We live and learn and in the process make many mistakes and sin, but God is gracious and will enable one to repent and start anew.

God bless you and the other poster whose dad needs the LORD.

ginnyrose

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Sandra Miller