Please pray for me, I am starting to get lazy and I feel I may have sinned against God by idolizing preachers loving what they are saying and "trying what they are saying" rather than experience what they are talking about and this has definitely shaken my faith. I read the Word but most of the time it feels its out of duty and not to truly seek God as I many times have proclaimed, I feel like I am working for my salvation again rather than resting in the beautiful Salvation Christ has laid a foundation for. I desire to repent but don't feel I hate what I do but this emptiness and lack of intimacy with God I most definitely hate, I have encountered the Holy God but have only seen a very small glimpse. Please prayer for my salvation that I may repent under God's terms and not my own that I truly foresake sin and cling to the cross. My heart is grieved and I'll admit I feel much less than a conquerer or even a dung heap. I have doubted my salvation for a long time because I am an intellectual person and fear its all intellect and not real. But mostly I feel beat up and weak, lots of stress in life right now and it seems to be taking a tole. I remember when I was 15 I would worship and not care who was watching and then pride rose up in me and now I don't think I have ever had the same intimate worship since. But Oh do I desire it I wish to be like Jeremiah with a fire in my bones to speak the Word but I feel cold, I know the truth but I don't think its a reality to me. I want what many Christians say they have and that is a deep relationship with the Lord. Well as I said please pray for me, I suppose my explaination should be enough to understand why. Thank You again Brothers and Sisters.God Bless,Matthew
I will pray for you
Dear Matthew,I think I know that which you speak of for it sounds like that which has happened to me on several occasions. Each time that it has happened, it has turned out that the enemy has tricked me into looking away from Jesus and unto myself. The solution each time was to simply turn my eyes back upon Jesus and repent of my unbelief. Here is a video of a song that I would always play when I felt as if I was falling away. [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nA2VpysAvgk]Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus - Selah[/url]. DO NOT WATCH the video - it is horrible to be looking at pictures of Jesus with your eyes when we need to be looking at Him with our heart. I will be praying for you.
I WILL BE PRAYING FOR YOU. ALL OF US HAVE TIMES LIKE THIS. I HAVE BEEN SAVED 33 YEARS AND CAN ATTEST THAT WE GO THROUGH SEASONS. I WANT TO SUGGEST YOU READ OR LISTEN TO GEORGE WARNOCK'S MESSAGES. THEY ARE REALLY MINISTERING TO ME AT THIS TIME, ESPECIALLY THE 5 PART SERIES FROM BEAUTY TO ASHES. TAKE HEART, THE FACT THAT YOU STILL CARE IS A INDICATION GOD IS WORKING IN YOUR HEART. WHAT HEARTSONG SAID, WHEN YOU LOOK AT YOU, YOU CAN'T LOOK AT THE LORD OF GLORY. FORGET YOU AND GAZE ON HIS GLORIOUS FACE.
here is the link where you can read George Warnock's books for free:http://georgewarnock.com/[url=http://georgewarnock.com/]George Warnock[/url]
Thank you all for the prayer, the night I posted this I went to my church and prayed and wept and proclaimed the Word over my life. My heart felt broken and prior to my prayers were for staying and being humble and teachable and I think in a round abour way that is exactly what God did. The Holy Spirit said if you want what the preachers you listen to a Reality then ask for them and plant those seeds in your heart and let them grow. So I asked God to plant and place in my heart the Scriptures needed for seeing the fruit of theses preachers. I ended up reading 1st John and praying and then going home. I felt despair and peace all at the same time. I ended up writing on my hand "Become Nothing, Make Christ Everything" and that is what I have been focusing on since. Thank you for your prayers they were very much appreciated.God Bless,Matthew
It's amusing that you should mention Jeremiah.i will stand with you in this, however it's asked that you consider that i had gone through this time and again, on again off again, until the Lord pointed out a scripture to me, which i pray whenever communion with him seem lacksy-daze-ICK-ill. Though the changes from lethargy and indolence are often drastic, and at times seem to have nothing to do with the laziness and lack-lustre communication with him, they do.Pray this and trust in his graciousness to pull you through:Jer. 10:24CIAO!
Now that is just awesome God is Good, I read that verse just yesterday and prayed it in agreement. Thanks so much for the prayers and I will continue to seek God's face in this matter.God Bless,Matthew