SermonIndex Audio Sermons
SermonIndex - Promoting Revival to this Generation
Give To SermonIndex
Discussion Forum : General Topics : I'm single. Any word of advice?

Print Thread (PDF)

Goto page ( 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 Next Page )
PosterThread
blinx
Member



Joined: 2006/10/10
Posts: 57
Oeiras, Portugal

 I'm single. Any word of advice?

I'm single.
I believe God has a wife for me and I'm waiting for her.
But I sometimes find it hard to concentrate on God when I'm thinking too much about 'her', you know?

Any advice on that?


_________________
João Tiago

 2007/2/16 9:26Profile
Provost
Member



Joined: 2006/12/28
Posts: 117


 Re: I'm single. Any word of advice?

I'm single too...just seek Him..love Him...learn about Him and He'll build you up

 2007/2/16 9:31Profile
iansmith
Member



Joined: 2006/3/22
Posts: 963
Wheaton, IL

 Re: I'm single. Any word of advice?

I don't know if Valentines day was a big deal in Portugal, but it is here. It was a painful reminder but I remember that God has something better planned for me.

One of the lessons I've learned is that I [i]could[/i] run off with some girl that I met somewhere, but that God has someone especially picked for me. If I choose for myself than I may as well be going against the will of God.

One thing I truly believe, and I'll quote my Pastor on this, 'Besides accepting Christ, there is no decision of greater importance in your life than who you choose to marry -and unfortunately most Christians don't understand this.'

God can make a beautiful thing out of a marriage that was against His will -just like he still worked through the line of David even after David's sin. But can you imagine what the line of David would have been like if David hadn't compromised?

There's a Korean proverb that says, 'Every shoe has a pair.' Koreans believe firmly that marriage is the most important sign that someone has stepped forward into adulthood. In ancient Korea you would change your haircut when you got married, and anyone unmarried was still considered a child -even if he was in his fifties.

Sorry for the tangent -but what I hoped to say with this illustration is that God has a match for you, there's another shoe to your pair. But it's not just any shoe, it's the shoe that God intends you to be with.

If God has a major plan for your life and has made you into a running shoe, and you end up marrying a high-heal, don't you imagine that would slow down your progress for God and send you spinning around in circles.

Now currently I've been praying for a wife, and I've also been praying about missions. I never used to think they had anything to do with eachother, but recently I've been meeting more missionary couples and I realize that they both have the same vision for reaching the lost, they're both willing to make the sacrifices to do it.

When I look at the girls that I've had crushes on in my church, I realize (and I don't mean this in a mean way) that they do not have those concerns. So I have had to change the lenses with which I am looking at sisters.

The fact of the matter is that God has someone for you, and when He brings her into your life you're going to know, or he's going to let you know. Until then, don't stress out, just focus on pleasing God and becoming a more fragrant blessing to others.


_________________
Ian Smith

 2007/2/16 10:42Profile
BenWilliams
Member



Joined: 2006/12/11
Posts: 351
El Paso, Texas

 Re: I'm single. Any word of advice?

I will tell you my experience, maybe it will help.

I was just out of a bad relationship, and as all young people do, I swore off ever getting married. (This by the way is at the age of 18.)

However, what I did do, that I haven't met many people that did this, is I went to God, and said: "If I am ever to get married, then my wife must meet these requirements." Then I listed about ten or twelve requirements, that I was not gonna back down on.

Now some people may say that that is me trying to control things, and not relying on the Lord to bring "the perfect woman" to me. That is a bunch of baloney.

The requirements I gave God were all Godly requirements. With the exception that I told Him I wanted a girl who would play some video games. (so maybe that one was my choice) : )

Anyways, I then proceeded to focus all my time and energy serving the Lord, and ignoring women entirely. Within about 4 months, one of my close friends (which happened to be a girl) suddenly became an interest for me.

So I sat her down, and we talked for about 5 hours a day, for a week. And she met every requirement that I had given God. We then decided to get married. But we figured it would be best to date for a bit, let all the family catch up on where we were at.

About 10 months later we got married. (that took too long) Never get engaged for more than a week. and don't date for more than about 15 minutes.

It was really a God thing, now do I believe that she was the only option out there that I could have married? No, but it became apparently obvious to me that she was the one God wanted me to marry.

Now, I'm not saying that you should go out and make a list, but if that helps to ward off girls that aren't Godly, by all means do so.


_________________
Benjamin Williams

 2007/2/16 10:52Profile
iansmith
Member



Joined: 2006/3/22
Posts: 963
Wheaton, IL

 Re:

My Pastor always says, 'make a list of 10 things, and if you find someone with five or seven of them, they're probably the one.'

Sometimes our lists are unreasonable, selfishly motivated or unrealistic. We have to remember that we're a person too -I certainly hope that if the girl that is looking for me doesn't have a list that says 'no chest hair,' or 'perfect teeth.' I'm finished!

Or even if she has a list, 'must be musically talented to lead praise,' or 'must be highly regarded in church.' Well if those are her requirements than I'm not going to fit them ~_~ Not that these are things I wouldn't desire in myself also. I'll just focus on being sold out for Jesus!


_________________
Ian Smith

 2007/2/16 10:57Profile









 Re: I'm single. Any word of advice?

Ben: Your testimony is amazing. Maybe I can get my boyfriend to post his side of our story, because it's much like what you've said... and it's such a God thing that neither of us can hardly breathe. It's amazing.

Anyway...

It's probably going to sound silly, because I'm sure you have already figured this out, but patience is key. It's also going to sound silly coming from an 18 year old girl, but this is what I can tell you:

Patience is absolutely the most important thing in such a situation. Being that I'm 18 and still in high school for a few more months, I'm surrounded by young people that go back and forth between different boyfriends and different girlfriends every other week. I've always stayed away from that, knowing that this would be striving. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Rather than conforming to the patterns of the world, patience is key. Do it God's way and He'll bless you.

A while back God started working in my life and said that I had to get to the point where I was happy with being single my whole life. He never said it was going to be that way, but I had to live as though it was. Through many tears and much broken-heartedness, I came to terms with the idea that maybe I was meant to be single. Many times it's important for the sake of ministry to remain single-minded, and always it's important to trust in God that He will provide for you as you have need.

But God just recently rewarded my patience.

Brother Ian said that his pastor says to make a list of ten things. I think that's a good idea. Make a list of things you won't compromise on. Have any kids? Put that down: "Must love my children like they were their own." Have any favorite hobbies? Go ahead and put those down, too.

See, God really did reward my patience. I never made a list myself, but a friend of mine did. God had him make a list of things a while back.. things that he would never ever compromise on. Be sensitive to God while making this list, and be realistic. I wouldn't advise getting so specific as to put things like, "brown hair, green eyes, and however many feet tall" because those things are trivial in the scope of things. But my friend made this list... and he never compromised on it. He held on to that list and trusted in God to fulfill it... and He did. I just happened to be the one that fit the things on his list.

God has His timing, and He holds our lives in the palm of His hand. Trust in that...

These are the three verses that gave me patience. I prayed these as a prayer many times, and God continually increased both faith and patience, and then fulfilled the promise in these verses by giving me someone that, although I don't deserve him, I know that God wants me to be with. He has blessed us both because we have sought HIM first.

Romans 12:2--And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Matthew 6:33
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Hebrews 11:6
But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.

 2007/2/16 11:28









 Re:

Also remember, that some are called to be single! And it is no more or less fun than having a partner.

 2007/2/16 11:49









 Re: I'm single. Any word of advice?

I'm still waiting for some of the older saints here on SI to give advice... :-D

Resources:
[url=http://www.amazon.com/Singled-Out-Nancy-Leigh-DeMoss/dp/0966712404/sr=8-1/qid=1171644569/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/104-3014696-7883910?ie=UTF8&s=books]Singled Out For Him by Nancy Leigh DeMoss[/url]-I [b]highly recommend[/b] this book for both guys and girls (singles of course :-)).

[url=http://www.amazon.com/Quest-Love-Stories-Passion-Purity/dp/0800758218/ref=pd_bxgy_b_text_b/104-3014696-7883910]Quest for Love by Elisabeth Elliot[/url]

[url=https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/mydownloads/visit.php?lid=13918/]Dating Sermon by Paul Washer[/url]-This is a really good message; I highly recommend it.

"You will never realize that Christ is all you need until He's all you have. And when He's all you have, you will come to understand that He is really all you need!" Taken from [i]Singled Out For Him[/i].

"The fact is, if we're not content with what we have, we will never be content with what we think we want...The man or woman who does not learn contentment as a single is highly unlikely to be content once married...The deepest needs and longings of our hearts cannot be filled by any human being but only by God Himself...The key to joyous living is to embrace the will of God and to receive with gratitude whatever gift [speaking of singlehood or marriage] He has given us." Taken from [i]Singled Out For Him[/i].

 2007/2/16 12:04
BenWilliams
Member



Joined: 2006/12/11
Posts: 351
El Paso, Texas

 Re:

That is way cool Amy, it appears that the Lord has truly blessed you both.

Amazingly enough, the things on my list were not even personal preferences, they were things like:

They must be willing to go hungry, for the spreading of the gospel, even to the point of starvation, and ultimately death.

These requirements I never wrote down, but I probably should have, I'm just not good at writing stuff down.


_________________
Benjamin Williams

 2007/2/16 12:42Profile
vico
Member



Joined: 2005/5/25
Posts: 258


 Re:

[ edit ]

 2007/2/16 12:42Profile





©2002-2024 SermonIndex.net
Promoting Revival to this Generation.
Privacy Policy