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Joined: 2011/8/3
Posts: 86

 Re: Overcome!

Brothertom, with all do respect, this is a very delicate situation. I do not know of all the details, but can definitely sense the weightiness of the issue. Ecclesiastes 3 shows us there is a time for everything. A time to weep and a time to love.

Yesterday at my place of employment, someone professed Christ. Hours later, a man came through in an airplane bragging about how many women he has slept with outside of his wife. I kid you not he said "If she started today, she wouldn't be able to catch me if she kept on until the day she died." My heart broke at this and I immediately left the room. Some marriages are in shambles and need to be dealt with carefully. In love, brother.

 2012/7/18 17:16Profile

Joined: 2012/7/12
Posts: 185
Southeast USA

 I don't pity you

I can relate to you, though.

Hope to talk to you soon.

I'm sending you an email.

Good night,



 2012/7/18 17:23Profile


Mat 5:32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

"For better or for worse - in sickness and in health - till death do us part"

Sister, you only know in part what I'm getting at.

I married a man that was a Bible College graduate. A Solomon. A man that could gather a crowd in no time because of his wisdom and Biblical fluency. A man that could pop up with an analogy out of thin air to explain ANY Bible passage or any solution to anyone's problems and yet the analogy would always be 100% Biblical. He was the Apologist of all Apologists. A Teacher of Teachers. He convinced me while I was still in Bible College that we should be married and because of his great spiritual wisdom and extrodinary knowledge of the Bible, I believd him. I was only 3 yrs old in The LORD.

I came home from a Bible class on Romans after we were married and he was in my cloths. He ran and hid in taking a shower, hoping I didn't see it.
I waited until just before bedtime to gently ask him, "Do you want to talk about it?" He said it was something that had a grip on him since he was 9. I understood because of his horrendous childhood and he said he'd be alright and I believed him because he had so much wisdom.

A few yrs past and next it was catching him with pot. Then DWI. And again, gently trying to talk him out of these things and thinking I had by his own admission.

[correction] 13 yrs later, he left our bed and stayed in his own den. At that point, I knew he wanted me dead, but I stayed with him.
Each year got worse until finally, I was disabled and couldn't get out of the house and was at his mercy to provide. I was his prisoner and he would do subtle things that I knew were to cause me to die.
I was a member of this forum at that time and one night, Satan came on me so strongly to take all of the pills in the house. It was the strongest urging I'd ever felt in my life. It was Satan and there isn't a doubt about it. SO convincing - But GOD stopped it in sort order. The fear of GOD is Good, The Word says - and I wouldn't be here if it weren't so.
My husband was doing everything on earth to get rid of me but I had no way to fulfill his desire to either die or leave. I had no income and he wanted everyone to believe he was a Christian, so he wouldn't leave me or make his attempts to have me die so obvious that the police or anyone else would find out, so that he could keep up his Christian image in front of everyone else.

Finally, after 30 yrs of loving him despite it all but still finding life unbearable, my Church and Christian friends by GOD's Providence, opened the doors of Heaven for me to escape and it thrilled my husband that now, he'd have the house to himself to 'come out of the closet' and do anything under the sun that he wanted, without conscience whatsoever of seeing me, the only form of conscience left in that house, from his perspective. By that time, there wasn't a sin that he was participating in and some that I can't post.

IF GOD had wanted me to stay - I would have. I had literally dozens of righteous Saints praying for me and GOD knew I wouldn't leave unless it was confirmed by them ALL. My Pastor and everyone that's known me for years.

I'm saying this because, no matter what you've done - your husband isn't right to make you feel that your marriage was a "mistake". Marriage is a Commitment - as those vows say above. I was there to help my husband for his Salvation's sake - even if it killed me. That's LOVE and THAT's Marriage -- and That's What Your Husband Should have done with you.

You can call your man "holy" all that you choose to - but holy is as holy does to their spouse - for better or for Worse!

I love you more than I can say Sister and no matter what sins you commited while married - they could never in a million years compare to the sins I saw my husband commit and yet I was commited to stay with him until 'he' wanted me to leave for his own freedom to go his own way.

GOD Help you!

I may not be posting anymore after this embarrassing post but don't you dare kill yourself.

Oh, and about our "childhoods" - I was tossed from home to home - a total of 8 homes and never in my life have I been in a home where I was wanted or loved - quite the contrary.

I know Satan's voice very well - especially from a single digit age, where the thought hit me that I didn't want to live very long ... but I had a heart for others' suffering all of my life and 'that' was what kept me alive and knowing that picture of Jesus on the wall since I was 3 was of a Real GOD that loved me. Don't know how I knew that - there were no Christians in my life until I was 23. I'll be 60 next March.

Shalom to you, with His Love, Sister.

I just wanted to add: that I haven't and won't divorse him, though I know I'll never see him again - because divorse would give Satan the rights over him, for him to give up completely and possibly cause worse to happen to him or cause him to marry someone else and put her through the same. If he wants a divorse, he'll have to get one himself and he knows that. He knows he's loved and we pray that's enough to bring Him to Christ one day.

Just wish you were given the same chance.

 2012/7/18 18:05

Joined: 2005/1/9
Posts: 1124
Germany NRW


Dear Sister 4gvn,

We prayed for you today in our house group thousand of miles away in the UK. I am sure here on this forum are some wise sisters who care about you and contacted you already. It is unwise for a man to contact her in private.

Would the rest of us brethren please leave this dear Sister alone and not try to publically analyse her problem. I am sure you have good intentions but it can be like acid to wounds. Let us just pray for her that God will send the help she needs. An internet forum is not fit to publically counsel people in such a vulnerable and potentially dangerous situation.

Could the moderators please intervene?

 2012/7/18 18:18Profile


Dear Brother NarrowPath, I pray I haven't offended you with my last post. Nor anyone else. I've spoken to our Sister a while back, but have no way to contact her anymore to tell her what I felt to say.

I have always felt that, when our Brethren were in the arenas with the lions, and heard of the stories of how one would place themselves over another, so that the lion would get them instead - that the lion could also represent the enemy and we need to be willing to lay down ourselves for anyone that's in his sights.

If the Moderators lock this thread - I can only ask that they first delete my post, for reasons I can't say.
Thank you and again, my apologies if I've offended.

 2012/7/18 18:50

Joined: 2008/7/24
Posts: 613


Dear Jesus-is-God,
There is nothing to be ashamed of by your post. It took great courage for you to write what you've written. May your husband repent and turn back to you.


 2012/7/18 19:24Profile

Joined: 2008/7/24
Posts: 613


Dear Michelle,
Trust in God. He is your saviour. Pls do not let Jesus die in vain for you. He took your place on the cross.

I am going to pray for you shortly.


 2012/7/18 19:25Profile

Joined: 2012/6/29
Posts: 52


@Jesus is God,

Thank you
I apologize .

your very brave.

i am speechless

 2012/7/18 19:35Profile


Thank you, learn, for praying for him!!

 2012/7/18 19:40


Sister 4gvn - when my husband first met me, he called me "Little Much Afraid" after the book, Hinds Feet on High Places.

Sis, "all things work together for the Good ... for vs 29"
and I wish I could just tell your husband that with the nightmare of life, it made me press in more and more into Him and got stronger and stronger - but I had a choice - to either blame my husband, if I wanted to fall and I knew I had that choice - but Jesus - Oh Jesus, is so Good.
He loves us Sis! We can depend and draw on Him without Limits.

I'll continue to pray you're well ~ in His Love :)
The JOY of The LORD 'is' our Strength!!!

 2012/7/18 19:45

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