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This is a topic that has come up many times on this forum. Consistantly, I think that Ginnyrose has the best take on it. I believe that there should be no rules on what a person should or should not wear, I just believe its a reflection of their walk with the Lord. Also, I do not buy into the theory that a woman does not realize what effect she is having, I believe that is the point of dressing in a certain manner in the first place, to have a certain effect. The way people dress is definately linked to a form of insecurity. If you go to my community in Scotland, where insecurity reigns supreme, you will see the shortest skirts and the lowest tops. Men will have the latest fashions as well there.

There is freedom in Christ, freedom from insecurtiy and freedom from what others think. My own wife is in total bondage to what other women think. If, for instance, she has worn an outfit to work, this same outfit could never be worn to a social function because " what would her co-workers think." Just trying to keep it real :) Frank

PS I think the original poster presents two different issues which have overlapping qualities. There is his lust issue which he must deal with, and then there is the issue of the way women dress. This overlaps because he is tempted and drawn into sin by the seductive way that some women dress.

 2011/5/26 12:58

Joined: 2010/2/3
Posts: 144

 Re: Women's Dress in Church - sensual or pretty?

I think this is one of the hardest areas to gently confront people on. Thanks to feminism (sp?) most women do not want you to tell them how to dress. Also the attitude of our age is that no one can tell you to do anything or that anything is wrong. The generation coming up has a REAL problem with athority (or at least here in America and what I've heard from my friends in Canada) and that will be reflected in their dress.

I also think modesty isn't preached on anymore because many pastors are afraid of losing members. I also don't buy the "women don't know what they're doing." If your a sister talking to another siser and you pry deep enough, they almost ALWAYS know what they are doing.
Working with teen girls I have a hard time getting it across that skinny jeans are just as imodest as a mini-skirt! It is one of the hardest things to get through to them.
I like Paul Washer's wife's saying: If your clothing is a frame for your body, it's sensual and sinful. If it's a frame for your face (where Christ is reflected) it's God-honoring. That's how I determine how to dress. I think it's straight forward without being legalistic.


 2011/5/26 14:14Profile


I hesitate to weigh in on this issue but I can identify with the posters concerns being a male myself. I do believe Appolous broke it down to two issues sexual lust and womens dress in church. The first can be dealt with by the word and prayer. I would recommend to the brother to meditate on verses that speak of a pure thought life. Verses such as Phil.4:8 and Rom.12:1-2 are good places to start. Psalm 119:9,11 speak of a young man living a cleansed life by he word of God. The second issue is a bit more touchy. The scriptures in 1 Tim. 2:9-10 leave room for the Holy Spirit to apply to each.sisters heart. I might add use our God given common sense. I do not believe that legalistic dress codes are the answer. But as I work in government and business I find that the professional women do dress with a bit more modesty.than some do n churches. Companies that establish dress policies are expecting their workers to.focus on work and not sex. When coordinating a seminar on employee conduct I heard the trainer exhorting the young women to dress professessionally. Her words. Sex does not sell in the work place. My point. If companies on the temporal realm establish reasonable dress polices that give rise to professional modesty should not the church be setting a higher standard for spiritual modesty.???

 2011/5/26 14:50

Joined: 2008/6/19
Posts: 1262



The bible teaches that women are to dress modestly and are to be in a behavior that is of a holiness lifestyle. The older women need to teach the younger women and their needs to be admonition from the pulpit at times but not legalistic in laying down rules.

The problem is their will always be women and their will always be those dressing inappropriately until Jesus returns to rule and reign.

The problem that you are having by looking at women needs to be dealt with according to the message of the cross and the power of the Holy Spirit. We need to be dead to sin and alive to God. Walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. The only way to be free from lust is to be dead but at the same time alive to God through the power of the Holy Spirit. If you keep lust alive by stirring it up with thoughts from the flesh you will always have problems. The scripture says that they who are thinking from the flesh and minding the things of the flesh will be walking after the flesh and will not be able to please God. The only way to please God is by walking according to the Spirit.

Here are some scriptures that you need to get in your spirit and memorize them by reading them over and over until you get the revelation. This will be important to you walking in the victory of Christ Jesus. Jesus Christ is our victory.

Romans 6:1-14 (KJV) 1 What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? 2 God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein? 3 Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? 4 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life. 5 For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection: 6 Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin. 7 For he that is dead is freed from sin. 8 Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him: 9 Knowing that Christ being raised from the dead dieth no more; death hath no more dominion over him. 10 For in that he died, he died unto sin once: but in that he liveth, he liveth unto God. 11 Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord. 12 Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof. 13 Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God. 14 For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.

Romans 8:1-14 (KJV) 1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. 2 For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death. 3 For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh: 4 That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. 5 For they that are after the flesh do mind the things of the flesh; but they that are after the Spirit the things of the Spirit. 6 For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. 7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be. 8 So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God. 9 But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his. 10 And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11 But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you. 12 Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh. 13 For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live. 14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.

Notice verse 13 that we through the Spirit are to mortify (kill) the deeds of the body (wrong desires from our flesh) so that we can live in the Spirit of God. We are to hate those lustful desires because it is sin against God. God wants you to overcome them through the power of the Holy Spirit that Christ Jesus has given us by His sacrifice on the cross. The ones who are born of God overcome through their faith in God..

I’m telling you brother the only way to be free is to be dead to your selfish desires and alive unto God and be filled with the Holy Spirit and walk continually in the Holy Spirit.

Pray through and be filled with the Holy Spirit and live above the sins of the flesh by recognizing yourself as an ambassador of Christ and refuse to live like an ordinary man.

Galatians 2:20 (KJV) I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

Blessings to you!

 2011/5/26 15:00Profile

Joined: 2011/4/7
Posts: 255


I believe that there should be no rules on what a person should or should not wear...

This idea is widespread, but in the church, you might be surprised at how much it simplifies and straightens things out so that all is done "decently and in order." So many hold that a standard of dress is binding and legalistic, but it's simply a matter of principle that only becomes legalistic WHEN YOUR HEART WANTS SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

I mean, if someone is satisfied that this is modest, this is discreet, this will not cause any brother to stumble, why call it "bondage" when it's simply a godly effort to walk uprightly and blamelessly before God and man? If your heart's there saying, "Yes, this is what I want," then it's yes, an outward effect of your walk with the Lord. But again, no one's making you do it, it's your choice. HOWEVER, this is how things ought to be, I'm not claiming this is how things always are.

I found an article related to this that likens standards to battlements. Very edifying; do read it if you have time...

Like it or not, every church has a standard of dress, whether spoken or unspoken; it's just a matter of how high or low your standard is. I read one book in which the author said if you have a problem with lust, it won't go away just because the ladies are covered from head to toe--all you're doing is making the imagination work overtime. His conclusion? Something like, "Therefore, you might as well not cover up so much, so they won't have to imagine so much...Remember, you're under grace and you needn't be under condemnation either!" What in the world? That's an awful twisting of God's word, using extreme cases to prove a point. Through the principles found in the Bible, I believe there is light for anyone to follow in this matter.

 2011/5/26 18:06Profile

Joined: 2010/11/11
Posts: 12


Hello all

As the original poster asking this questions i would like to thank you for your thoughts.

Yes i battle two issues, lust and the modesty question. Yes i am dealing with lust. I am always open to admonishment in regards to battling sin however i was focused on the clothing issue in this thread.

An example is on our last church social a woman who is a member and heavily involved in the church stepped out of her vehicle with a very low cut dress that i was shocked to see. So i spent the rest of the evening avoiding her as well as another woman as i did not wish to tempt myself.

Actually my first reaction was to bolt and leave but i realized that is not very mature especially since it was God's will that i socialize and use this opportunity to get aquainted with people i have not yet met.

I just remember thinking... has lust changed me to the degree that i cannot handle "normal" womens dress in church? Or is this clothing out of line and i should be shocked to see it?

Anyways i will operate under the belief that these women do dress immodest from time to time and it is my responsibility to continue to die to self and say yes to God so that this will not affect me as much.

Ideally i would like a safe place (the church) to not have to worry about me eyes seeing what i consider sexy attire however if i struggle with sin on a daily basis it is reasonable to believe these women do as well. So i will learn to practice forbearance, as i would wish this from them if they realized what i struggled with.

Thanks for listening.

 2011/5/26 20:40Profile

Joined: 2008/10/30
Posts: 2091

 Re: The Sin of Bathsheba

At the request of Ginnyrose in her post,I did a search and found this article written by a brother in Christ to women.The article was on a website owned by a mother of nine.

If some think he's gone overboard then just throw him a life jacket.

 2011/5/26 21:35Profile

Joined: 2010/6/8
Posts: 191


A woman or a man needs to dress how they feel or are led until the holy spirit changes there heart on that subject or any subject for that matter

 2011/5/26 22:43Profile

Joined: 2010/2/3
Posts: 144


At the request of Ginnyrose in her post,I did a search and found this article written by a brother in Christ to women.The article was on a website owned by a mother of nine. If some think he's gone overboard then just throw him a life jacket.

Wow savannah, that article was amazing! I've never read such an in depth article about different types of clothing. Much there to think about and chew on. Thank you for posting!


 2011/5/26 22:55Profile

Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


by savannah on 2011/5/26 15:35:34

At the request of Ginnyrose in her post,I did a search and found this article written by a brother in Christ to women.The article was on a website owned by a mother of nine.

If some think he's gone overboard then just throw him a life jacket.


This is an interesting read. It does go over in detail all the articles of clothing that's for sure. Not sure what to think about all that was shared as another said much to think on. I have always felt more should be taught on modesty but am thinking maybe this goes to far the other direction....praying about it though.

Thanks for sharing
God bless

 2011/5/26 23:00Profile

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