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Theophila Member
Joined: 2007/1/15 Posts: 365
| Re: Adultrey | | Dear Lord, Please show Lovefirst what to do and give him the courage to do it! We, his brethren, know so little but all of his life is an open book before You.
Please help him get over this rather large huddle. Please don't let the enemy take advantage of this home because of this situation.
Whatever else happens, let him clearly know what to do and how to do it.
Thank you, Father. I ask this in Jesus' name, amen. _________________ Tolu
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2011/5/3 11:52 | Profile |
narrowpath Member
Joined: 2005/1/9 Posts: 1522 Germany NRW
| Re: Adultrey | | Your conscience pricks you that is why you ask the question. Consciousness comes from God, accusation from Satan. What would you do if you had stolen before you came to Christ? Would it be right for you to keep the stolen goods? Of course not. If you sinned against her after you got married, you should confess it to her. Only confessed sins are forgiven. I did tell my wife about my sins I committed before we got married.
Be careful to get counsel in an open forum, you get all sorts of opinions which leads to confusion, it better to speak to a trusted person faces to face.
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2011/5/3 10:57 | Profile |
Lysa Member
Joined: 2008/10/25 Posts: 3699 East TN for now!
| Re: Adultrey | | Quote:
Lysa. However, if that relationship produced a child, your wife should know.
Ginnyrose is absolutely correct, you would have to tell her then. I hope it didn't produce a child.
_________________ Lisa
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2011/5/3 10:18 | Profile |
ginnyrose Member
Joined: 2004/7/7 Posts: 7534 Mississippi
| Re: Adultrey | | I agree with Lysa. However, if that relationship produced a child, your wife should know. Given the times we are in most children will at some time want to meet their biological parents, be they adopted or not. What would your family's reaction be if someone were to call your house and tell your wife that your husband is my daddy? and that, yes, he/she was conceived after you had married her?
Sin creates a storm for those close to you... _________________ Sandra Miller
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2011/5/3 9:50 | Profile |
| Re: Adultrey | | I'd say No as well, because if it was before Christ - than it's under the blood and in the sea of forgetfulness so what right have you to pick it back out from where GOD has forgiven and forgotten it - when it would also just Hurt your wife. It's under the blood, forgiven, forgotten and to throw it at her wouldn't just hurt her but take-back the work of Christ's suffering for you, for that sin. |
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2011/5/3 9:23 | |
Lysa Member
Joined: 2008/10/25 Posts: 3699 East TN for now!
| Re: Adultrey | | Quote:
Lovefirst wrote: If a married man commits adultrey, should he confess this sin to his wife? I commited adultrey long before me and my wife committed ourselfs to Christ.
My vote is no. I know people will disagree with me but my vote is still no. Why do you feel this need to possibly break her heart with this information that is long behind you? I believe that you can seek the Lord for release of this guilt without including your wife,.... unless you are feeling the pull to do it again with another woman and you think that telling her will fix that?
Security plays a HUGE part in a womans marriage, security in life, emotionally security and stability and there many others elements that are there and if you tell her, absolutely everything that meant something to her will have been a farce; nothing she felt secure with will have been true (in her mind and her emotions). Even the most spiritual womans foundation will be shaken to the core to find out her husband was not faithful.
If you tell her, are you willing to put in the work.... FOR MAYBE YEARS to let her know that you are in it for the long haul? I do not know your wife but Im pretty sure that even after all these years telling her will affect the most intimate parts of your marriage.. That spontaneous smile you get from her at different times? Yeah, it wont be there anymore possibly for long awhile. Some men may say, Yes, I can handle it, but a few months in to it become bitter because she just cant forgive and forget and act like nothing ever happened especially in the bedroom.
Its going to take a LOT of work, stuff you never dreamed of and if you are not willing to walk with this out in love (possibly for years) with her; then do not tell her; find your guilt released from the Lord. He can give it to you and you too can move on as if nothing happened and feel no guilt!
Thats just my two cents of experience, take it or leave it. God bless you in your decision, Lisa
_________________ Lisa
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2011/5/3 9:12 | Profile |
Zionshield Member
Joined: 2007/2/13 Posts: 135 Ohio
| Re: Adultrey | | You will need to listen to the Holy Spirit about this. Have you asked the Lord? Are you close enough to hear Him? Only He knows the timing and the way.
If you don't tell her you will have a block between you and her, preventing intimacy. Its important as you may know not to just unleash this on her. You really need to hear from the Lord on this matter.
Also Joe Dallas has a good book, The Game Plan, that has some things that would help you deal with this. _________________ Randy Lambert
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2011/5/2 23:17 | Profile |
Lovefirst Member
Joined: 2011/4/2 Posts: 103 Lake Charles, LA
| Adultrey | | If a married man commits adultrey, should he confess this sin to his wife? I commited adultrey long before me and my wife committed ourselfs to Christ.
I know that this may be a touchy subject for some, I feel it's safe to discuss since noone knows who I am. _________________ Bryan Reed
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2011/5/2 23:04 | Profile |