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 Women need to find thier place, men too!

The real problem with abortion lies with feminist movement, the idea that her body is her own and she can do what she likes with it.

This is wrong, When a Man and a Woman sexually marry they have in thier minds the concept that this person belongs to me. This does not come from them, it was given to them by God. Thats why when one of them cheats, the other is jealous.

In the animal kindom it's not so, a male will mate with several females(depending on type of animal) and the next year mate with entirely new set of females.

This reasoning has only been given to mankind.

The woman needs to find her place again, she really is lost. Now if any woman who is a believer gets mad at this statement than you are very much in the world.

The woman is lost in society, some find thier way by forsaking the feminist movement, many do not. Thats why homosexuality is rampant, yes you guessed it, its because the woman is not in sync with her role, she is out of place. She wants to be the head or equal to her husband, this is not Gods design.

Believe it or not but men turn to men because the role to submit is found. Though twisted and perverted yet in every male male relationship one of the men are playing out the submissive role that a woman ought to play. This is so natural to hetersexual marriages, that when it is not found divorce is at the door.

As soon as a man mentions that a woman needs to submit, the first thing that comes into a womans mind is that she thinks submission is talking about being under the hammer, being pounded to a pulp. The word submit is being misapplied, because Paul uses the word in connection to our submission to God. Is God going to treat us wrongly? certainly not. But men need to be retrained into dealing with his wife. Men are to be the priest of his household, that is he serves his wife, providing his wife honours him thru submission. Once this is recognized and fought for, such marriages tho rare in North America are relished and enjoyed. Such women are full of grace and inner beauty, she runs her household with integrity and uprightness.

It is natural for a woman to rebel as a newlywed, she must find her place (women hate hearing that), but let me add this, men need to find their place too. He can't just run off with the boys whenever he feels like it. And if either one of them goes to the bar room with the boys or with the girls, I question thier relationship. If you want to drink, have a house party. Too many advances from men at the bar (if your something to look at of course :-P

What does this have to do with abortion?

Much in every way. The woman and her idea that she owns her body is out of place, abortions run rampant because of her. She can cheat on her husband, get custody of children and still run around. Men are left in the dust in the court room, even when it comes to abortion.

They can fight for the sancitity of marriage of being one man and one woman all they want, but the marriage is useless if the roles are not being played out the way God design it to be, and if that be true, than it doesn't matter if men marry men, no one is following Gods rules anyway. It doesn't matter if your a Christian husband and wife, the same problems have crept into the Christian marriage.

I know of a Christian couple today who are seperated because the man is not willing to fulfill his role. She is home tending to the kids, and to top it all off, she still loves him. She is submissive, but he has issues that are bothering him from his past and he takes it out on her. So he goes out a whoring after other women, and she still receives him back. People around her tell her that she has every right to divorce him, but she believes in God, that the LORD will work this mess out. She is nothing to look at, but she has a heart of gold. This man needs to find his place before he loses it and then regrets it.

 2006/1/26 15:14
brentw
Member



Joined: 2005/12/14
Posts: 440
Ohio

 Re: Women need to find thier place, men too!

A bar?? You got to be backslidden to enjoy a bar scene anyway. What I have read she has no right to divorce her husband unless hes committed adultrey. She lost all her rights if & when she went to the cross! As a pastor when I counsel others the first question I ask is about a couples devotional life. Are you in prayer everyday seeking the face of God? Are you in the Word everyday? And if the answers are NO which they normally are if they have troubles... that IS THEIR PROBLEM!! They have no relationship with God. I have never found someone HOT for Christ and their marriage in trouble. Theres been more books written about marriage in the last 40 years than in history. I know I'm being straight forward but we dance to much in church anymore.


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Brent

 2006/1/26 15:45Profile
lovejt
Member



Joined: 2005/11/5
Posts: 122


 Re:

brent, thats what i always felt too and i'm single. So, when i 'date' or get to know someone, first thing i'm wondering about is how is this person's devotional life.... What would you consider as a 2nd and 3rd question in this scenario? I believe singles can apply this in their relationships to avoid potential problems.

thanks,
-j


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james thorpe

 2006/1/27 1:09Profile
brentw
Member



Joined: 2005/12/14
Posts: 440
Ohio

 Re:

lovejt,

If they're in the Word and prayer daily really seeking God theres really no other questions, because if they're doing this then my 3rd question would be: are you witnessing?? But again if their seeking God then they should have a natuaral desire to win the lost. Just listen what they want to talk about the most and that will tell you volumes!! If Jesus is their life then you will hear it. Just look for the FIRE!! Fire is self-evident.


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Brent

 2006/1/27 11:45Profile
lovejt
Member



Joined: 2005/11/5
Posts: 122


 Re:

Thanks Brent! Any extra advice can only help. :) I love what you said below.

>I have never found someone HOT for Christ and their marriage in trouble.

Amen!
-j


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james thorpe

 2006/1/27 16:13Profile
Graftedbranc
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Joined: 2005/11/8
Posts: 619


 Re:

I think Loveslave has some very good points. Also the others.

The difficulty with marriage is both come into it expecting the other one to make them happy. And when they soon discover that their spouse is not the Angel of God but the Cross of Christ, then trouble begins.

Two fallen self centered people will not find the bliss they expected. The wife does not submit and the husband does not love His wife as Christ loved the Church.

The reason marriages fail today is on two accounts. In the old days morality was still a big factor and there was an element of shame in failed marriages. And this kept many miserable couples together despite their unhappyness.

Today this restraint is all but gone. And so as soon as the marriage ceases to be the bed of bliss they go their way. But whether we take the moral way or the modern way, the problem is still not solved.

But the anwer is in taking the Cross. That is allowing God to use your spouse no matter what they are like to be an instrument of death to your self life. And by learing to turn to the Lord and apply the Cross then we live in resurrection Life and the Love of Christ becomes the reality in our marriage.

Over time two people who love Christ and take the cross and cease to view the other as their means of satisfaction become united not only in spirit but become one souled. There is a reality and beauty of Christ between them which others see and admire.

The successful marriage is one that flows from the Spirit of Christ. And this comes only through the experience and application of the Cross.

Graftedbranch

 2006/1/29 16:38Profile
Graftedbranc
Member



Joined: 2005/11/8
Posts: 619


 Re:

I would also add that as long as a man demands submission and says, "I would love her if she would only submit" He will never get what he wants. If she is strong willed, she will reject him and rebel. If she is weak willed she may become outwardly submissive but inwardly she is miserable (and probably secretly plotting his demise). Either way he does not have what he wants.

But if he finds his satifaction in Christ alone then He can love his wife no matter if she is stong willed or weak sumissive or rebellious.

And on the same score as long as a woman says, "I would submit if he only loved me like he should" she will never find satisfaction.

We must accept the spouse Our Lord has given us and take the cross to our Self. Then we can experience Christ as our satisfaction and we will find over time that we are spontaniously loveing and she is spontaniously submitting out of Life and not out of compulsion.

The husband will cease demanding and the wife will stop manipulating to make him the way she thinks he should be. There will be the Reality of Christ and the sweet aroma of His resurrection life in their marriage.

I knew one brother who had attended a certian bible school and he was always having trouble with his wife not submitting. And he said, "I don't understand her. When we first married we went through the Bible snd studied all the verses which show a woman's role."

But I asked him. "when did you do a study of the husbands role in loving his wife? He said, "no, we didn't do that.

The commands to the wife are not written to him for the husband to use to gain her submission. They are written to her. And the Scritpures pertaining to the husband are written to him.

There is not a verse in the Bible which says, "Husbands, make your wives submit" or 'wives, have your husband love you as Christ loved the Church"

Graftedbranch



 2006/1/29 16:58Profile
abbiegrrl
Member



Joined: 2005/12/28
Posts: 24
In a desert...Central Indiana at the moment

 Re:

"Believe it or not but men turn to men because the role to submit is found."

I disagree with that statement, and I wonder if the writer is speaking from experience or hearsay? I can tell you from having spoken with formerly gay individuals, that THAT is NOT the reason. SORRY.
I am reluctant to even address this thread, b/c I don't want to fan the flames of contempt. So, I will attempt to be as gentle as I can, under the circumstances. Please forgive me if I am not successful.
I hear too many times of well-meaning "christian" counsel that tells women that they are absolutely under no circumstances, except adultery, of course, to leave their home/husband. They tell me that there is NO reason that the Lord is going to accept, for her to leave. Why, then did the apostle even address the SEPERATION from the husband, for a time?
I wonder how many of these ppl have ever lived in a situation where the woman was being abused? Where the children are being abused and the woman is afraid to even attempt to speak to anyone in the church for fear they will be told that they are just not "LOVING" their man enough? I have a friend, now, who is in a similar situation to what I have described. Her church friends are telling her that she needs to just submit more. THEY do not seem to hear her when she tells them she is being abused. Many times it is possible to hide the marks, btw.
I realize that there are always those who will look for ANY reason to run. That's not what I'm talking about. I personally stayed in a marriage with a man who was a sociopath, abusive, and very nearly convinced me that *I* was the insane one. I stayed through the illnesses from the stress, I stayed through the periods of my hair falling out from being under attack nonstop. I barely made it out alive.
Was I wrong to refuse to submit MORE????
Perhaps I was. I am not nor was I then, a superhuman, OR a supersaint. I have done the best I knew how, to do what I read in the Word. I stayed there a lot longer than many would have. BUT God is not going to comdemn me for saving my life. I have no problem with being a martyr, but women are NOT called to die for their husbands.

 2006/1/31 0:32Profile
Graftedbranc
Member



Joined: 2005/11/8
Posts: 619


 Re:

Quote:
That's not what I'm talking about. I personally stayed in a marriage with a man who was a sociopath, abusive, and very nearly convinced me that *I* was the insane one. I stayed through the illnesses from the stress, I stayed through the periods of my hair falling out from being under attack nonstop. I barely made it out alive.



Sister, I believe you are correct. There is provision made in the New Testament for extenuating circomstance. Even among believers who separate "but let them remain unmarried or be reconciled to their spouse"..

But provision is also made conserning those who believe and are married to unbelievers. "Let them depart for the believer is not bound in such circomstances". And a husband who habitually mentally and physically abuses his wife and children shows little evidince of being a genuine believer.

What is needed in all such circomstances is a close walk with the Lord, and being sensitive to His leading together with much prayer and fellowship with those who know Christ. Not the legalists who are ready to impose their legalism. But there is a time when one should remove herself from such abusive circomstances. The Lord knows our frame that we are dust.

Those men who make it their practice to speak often of men's dominance and right to control and rule over their wives are rarely Living Christ. And even though their wives may be outwardly submissive to them, inwardly there is little affection. They serve their husbands out of fear and servitude believeing this is what they "are supposed to do" because that is what their "church" tells them. These men are living their strong moralistic opinions and know nothing of the Cross and the life of Christ.

Graftedbranch

 2006/1/31 8:41Profile
rookie
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Joined: 2003/6/3
Posts: 4803


 Re: Women need to find thier place, men too!

Loveslave wrote:

Quote:
Men are to be the priest of his household, that is he serves his wife, providing his wife honours him thru submission. Once this is recognized and fought for, such marriages tho rare in North America are relished and enjoyed.




According to the 2000 Census, just 26% of all families can be labeled as a nuclear family. And based on that starting point, how many men, in those nuclear families, practice according to the Scriptures their priestly duties? So you are correct, it is truly a rare thing indeed.

In Christ
Jeff


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Jeff Marshalek

 2006/1/31 9:47Profile





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