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Discussion Forum : General Topics : Qualifications of a Pastor and being single, not married

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deltadom
Member



Joined: 2005/1/6
Posts: 2359
Hemel Hempstead

 Qualifications of a Pastor and being single, not married

Titus 1
5 For this reason I left you in Crete, that you should set in order the things that are lacking, and appoint elders in every city as I commanded you— 6 if a man is blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of dissipation or insubordination. 7 For a bishop[b] must be blameless, as a steward of God, not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, 8 but hospitable, a lover of what is good, sober-minded, just, holy, self-controlled, 9 holding fast the faithful word as he has been taught, that he may be able, by sound doctrine, both to exhort and convict those who contradict.

1 Timothy 3New King James Version (NKJV)
Qualifications of Overseers

3 This is a faithful saying: If a man desires the position of a bishop,[a] he desires a good work. 2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; 3 not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money,[b] but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; 4 one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence 5 (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?); 6 not a novice, lest being puffed up with pride he fall into the same condemnation as the devil. 7 Moreover he must have a good testimony among those who are outside, lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.
Qualifications of Deacons

8 Likewise deacons must be reverent, not double-tongued, not given to much wine, not greedy for money, 9 holding the mystery of the faith with a pure conscience. 10 But let these also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons, being found blameless. 11 Likewise, their wives must be reverent, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things. 12 Let deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well. 13 For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a good standing and great boldness in the faith which is in Christ Jesus.

I find it so hard being single as I feel not much use in the church being single. As the qualifications in scripture are to be married to be in any part of leadership.

The problem is that in the church there are very few leaders who even hold to these standards in church.


_________________
Dominic Shiells

 2016/3/17 16:34Profile









 Re: Qualifications of a Pastor and being single, not married

As I recall brother, the Apostle Paul was single. Timothy might have been to. I don't know if this answers your question. But something to ponder.

Brother Blaine

 2016/3/17 17:39
brothagary
Member



Joined: 2011/10/23
Posts: 2556


 Re:

I think the context is not what you think .....

I think Paul is really refuring to those who have been married twice ,devorced once ,,that those are not to be to pastering positions ...., that is the reason why he says the husband of one wife ,,, not that it is mandatory to be married ,before one can be in the office of a paster .........

 2016/3/17 21:00Profile









 Re:

Hi Dominic

I think you need to see a bit the wider picture here.
Try and see also the "Body " of Christ, in a body each member is important.! Also remember that "neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but God who causes the growth" 1 Corinthians 3:7

 2016/3/18 1:38









 Re: Qualifications of a Pastor and being single, not married

Me & another brother/leader of our home fellowship talked about this before. While the seemingly clearest indicators are that he is referring in that passage to not having multiple wives (having multiple wives, at once - ie polygamy) was still not terribly uncommon in that day/culture), there is also some wisdom in selecting a man who has a wife & children & that being the "proving ground" in a sense for his ability to shepherd/lead/minister. Not as a "law", but at least seeing the general principle of it being a proving ground. Even the scripture backing this idea when it speaks of (somewhat paraphrased): if one cannot lead his own family (concerning his children being in order, his ministry to his wife, etc.), then how can rule in the house of God?

While Paul was single, I do think as a general normative principle (born out in several places in the scriptures including Ephesians 5 & elsewhere in addition to the "listed prerequisite qualifiers for leadership scriptures") that you see how a man leads & ministers to some degree by his own household. Humbling for me as a father of soon to be 7 who often sees his own weakness/frailty/shortcomings. These would never be as deeply prodded & evident with no wife & kids. Just wouldn't. But again, not making it a "law", but just some thought from all of the scriptures on leadership, men, family, etc. overall.

Just my thoughts.

 2016/3/18 9:04
havok20x
Member



Joined: 2008/9/14
Posts: 980
Pineville, LA

 Re:

This is where I can rest in the sovereignty of God. I know that God is in control of all things, so as a single man, who desires some day to serve the church as an elder in the future, I very much understand where you are coming from.

The thing is that Paul was not an elder/pastor and neither was Timothy, at least at the time that the epistles were written. They were, from what we can gather from Scriptures, church planters and church growers, and they were mightily used by God. There are many missionaries who do exactly those things and they are also mightily used of God. Within the context of the local church, the same thing can be for single men and women. Although they may not get to be pastors, that is just fine if their mindset is biblical.

The greatest people in the Kingdom are slaves of all, and I am convinced that the greatest people in all of Christianity have never even been heard of. They don't have their names written in the halls of church history, because they did not seek to make their own names famous, but they sought to make the name of Jesus Christ glorious!

You said that you don't feel much use in the church in being single. That is part of the travesty of the church age we are in. We have a tendency to heap up or allow only certain individuals to serve while the rest of us are served. Whether we do this because we don't seem to have a choice or we make it a reality, it truly is our own doing. I thank God that my body does not let my heart and brain do all the work while the rest just enjoys it. I would be dead.

Every part of the body has a role. Every part of the body has a part. And that part is to serve to the rest of the body, regardless of how glorious or useful it seems at the time.

That being said: I sure wish I could do more service and less self-seeking.

 2016/3/18 9:35Profile
Renee_is_His
Member



Joined: 2016/3/9
Posts: 74
Garland, TX

 Re:

The greatest and most important ministry a single man/woman can have is the ministry of prayer. This is the ministry our Lord is currently engaged in-the ministry of intercession (Heb 7:25). Brother, have you considered giving yourself to the Lord in this way? As a single woman, it is a tremendous privilege and honor to serve the Lord this way. I believe Brother Blaine would agree with me.

It is not glamorous by any means. You are hidden away, and you have an audience of One. It is humbling, crucifying, and self-abasing work. You are utterly dependent on the Holy Spirit. You come to learn that in your flesh there is nothing good. But the blessings are immense. You will come to know the Lord more intimately than ever before. It will also prepare you for whatever public ministry the Lord may have for you, if that is His will. Not everyone can be an elder, prophet, or teacher; but every born-again spirit filled saint of God can be an intercessor.

Prayerfully consider your motives of desiring to have a "public" ministry or a position of leadership. Examine your heart before the Lord. He loves you too much to put you into something prematurely. I speak from experience.

Your sister in Christ,
Renee


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Renee

 2016/3/18 9:59Profile
MrBillPro
Member



Joined: 2005/2/24
Posts: 3422
Texas

 Re:

The shepherds of all shepherds Jesus Christ was single, wasn't Jesus a minister?


_________________
Bill

 2016/3/18 10:39Profile









 Re:

Domonic what exactly was on your heart when you posted the OP? What are you trying to tell us brother?

Blaine

 2016/3/18 11:05
deltadom
Member



Joined: 2005/1/6
Posts: 2359
Hemel Hempstead

 Re:

What I find interesting is that people who are married are put into leadership positions but the problem is not that as I love the qualification from the word of God for a pastor and wish it would be implemented worldwide across the church and if God provides me someone suitable in the future let the lords will be done


_________________
Dominic Shiells

 2016/3/18 11:27Profile





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