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bible4life
Member



Joined: 2009/1/21
Posts: 1559
Locport, Illinois

 need prayer i have much anguish right now in my heart

Everything for me right now is going wrong. Over the past few days i have struggled with panic attacks, have had a hard time thinking, also the struggle with the demonic attacks to my heart being hardened more and more it seems. Yesterday i became fearful that the Lord might have given me up for good. Then i prayed that if their was still hope that he would strengthen me and he did, but i woke up again earlier and read hebrews chapter ten and read some of the commentary on it by Matthew Henry and a few others and it really has just brought more fear on me. The thing is i look and it is pretty clear that Christ's sacrifice atones for all sins. But for the past 5 years i have tried coming back to the Lord with all my heart, many days praying much of the day especially this year and reading the word more than i ever have, but all that has seemed to happen is me fall further and further away and my heart seems to get harder and harder even though i dont want it to. Everytime i try to trust in Christ it seems something is keeping me from doing it. I am very scared right now. I wish the Lord would be merciful to me, but i feel that it is not going to be happening with me.


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John Beechy

 2012/8/21 14:23Profile
ccchhhrrriiisss
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Joined: 2003/11/23
Posts: 4501


 Re: need prayer i have much anguish right now in my heart

I am praying for you, brother. Rest in the knowledge that God will never leave you nor forsake you. He is with you right now.

You can't be "good enough" for God. Our righteousness is as filthy rags. And, of course, God loves us so much that he died for us while we were yet sinners. He is always longing to hold you in His arms.

Quote:
Romans 8:31-39

31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? 32 He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things? 33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth. 34 Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.

37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. 38For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, 39Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.


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Christopher

 2012/8/21 14:54Profile
bible4life
Member



Joined: 2009/1/21
Posts: 1559
Locport, Illinois

 Re:

the promises seem so good, but it is like i am just seeing myself fall more and more over the years. I am worst than i was a couple years ago. I mean i did have a year or year and a half where things seemed to get better and i had hope again, but i have fallen so hard this time around and my biggest struggle is not even the health problems or necessarily the demonic attacks, but more with my thought life and it is seems my heart becoming more sinful and wicked, it seems like no matter how much i cry out that i continue to get worse. I miss the days where God was working in my life. The whole thing whether you can lose salvation or not and true and false conversion has really confused me. I don't know if i was really saved before or not or whether i lost my salvation, it really is tormenting me now again and along with it i am struggling with demonic attacks.


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John Beechy

 2012/8/21 16:08Profile
Lee500
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Joined: 2012/7/25
Posts: 131


 Re: need prayer i have much anguish right now in my heart

I will be praying that you will overcome anxiety. I have noticed from myself experiencing anxiety, that it came from the accumulation of the negative thoughts in my head. There's so much currently going on in my life at this present time that I've been anxious, nervous, and feeling like I am ill. Just continue to pray, and fellowship with God and I promise you that those dreadful feelings will cease.

God Bless you,

 2012/8/21 18:44Profile
mama27
Member



Joined: 2010/11/20
Posts: 1382


 Re:

John, I have prayed much for you since I came on SI 2 years ago...I don't recall if you ever made contact with Jim Logan, but I think you could benefit from more "professional" Christian counseling than some of us are able to offer here...I don't minimize your anxiety and sufferings in any way...I just think you could benefit by someone who deals with these things and could be better equipped to help you. I will continue to pray for you....

 2012/8/21 20:11Profile
psalm1
Member



Joined: 2007/1/30
Posts: 1230


 Re: need prayer i have much anguish right now in my heart

One thing is for sure,you have been robbed of your joy.

I think the enemy in these last days is working overtime.

The joy of the lord is my strength.So what does the enemy do?He isolates and then goes for the kill.

Once he takes your joy,and faith you are putty in his hand.

So don't put up with it.Learn how to stand in faith.Cultivate your quite time.

Don't go by feeling.Tell yourself your are going to do it,and follow through.

As you make moves toward God the enemy will for a fact also move toward you.It is his job.Rebuke him and make him go.Rise up and do it.I promise you he will leave you.(If you are not in some sin or rebellion).

I wish all believers would seek the baptism of the Holy Spirit.It is the power of the walk.

 2012/8/21 21:45Profile
psalm1
Member



Joined: 2007/1/30
Posts: 1230


 Re: need prayer i have much anguish right now in my heart

BTW,
I have been under almost the same attack!

You got to look at the walk with God differently.It seems horrible to you right now.You are in what is called the "dark hour of the soul".

Watch what happens as you activate faith.You will begin to come out of that pit.

I have been in it a few times,and have learned that seasons come to every believer.

Begin to look at the attacks as awesome,and the deliverance from them as awesomer.

Our walk is an adventure.Enjoy the ride! :) :)

Have as your testimony the awesome power that God brought you out of such a dark hour.

If i saw you in person I could show you how to stand in faith.
When you learn how,the whole ball game changes.You will never be the same.

 2012/8/21 21:55Profile
ADisciple
Member



Joined: 2007/2/3
Posts: 835
Alberta, Canada

 Re: need prayer i have much anguish right now in my heart

"but i woke up again earlier and read hebrews chapter ten and read some of the commentary on it by Matthew Henry and a few others and it really has just brought more fear on me."

Brother, I encourage you to leave that passage in Heb. 10 alone just now. Quit tormenting yourself with it. Rather, read passages that will bolster your confidence.

Keep yourself in the love of God. Walk in love. Show love. Find an opportunity to show love to someone, and do it.

That will assure your conscience, the apostle John says.

"My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
And HEREBY we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure (persuade) our hearts (our conscience) before Him..."

Your heart (your conscience) in a state of weakness will be trying to condemn you.

But John is saying that love will persuade the conscience so that it is no longer able to do that.

For, John says, "God is greater than our heart (our conscience) and knoweth all things."

In other words, our conscience doesn't know all things. It can be in a state weakness, of darkness. But God is greater than our conscience and knows all things; He knows that we are His, that He loves us with an everlasting love, and that we love Him. Though our love be but a weak love, He receives it. He knows what Christ has done on Calvary to "put away sin by the sacrifice of Himself." He knows He is going to see you through, brother. He has no intention of saying Good-bye to you.

"Five bleeding wounds He bears,
Received on Calvary:
They pour effectual prayers,
They strongly plead for me;
Forgive him, O forgive, they cry,
Nor let that ransomed sinner die."




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Allan Halton

 2012/8/21 23:10Profile
bible4life
Member



Joined: 2009/1/21
Posts: 1559
Locport, Illinois

 Re:

thanks guys i did contact Jim Logan a few months ago and he did recommend a place in indianapolis, but i never went. I feel bad at times that i am not trusting God at times. It is hard for me even to ask for prayers sometimes because i feel as if i begin to trust people instead of God. That is why i struggle with taking meds or vitamins because i struggle with my faith when i do so.


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John Beechy

 2012/8/22 0:42Profile
learn
Member



Joined: 2008/7/24
Posts: 613


 Re:

[by psalm1
If i saw you in person I could show you how to stand in faith.
When you learn how,the whole ball game changes.You will never be the same.]

Psalm1,
why don't you start a thread in this forum on how to do so. Surely it will help people like bible4life and others. Will you prayerfully consider this. Thks


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geraldine

 2012/8/22 1:09Profile





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