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Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057

 Should single women remain living at home

(I changed the thread title to better reflect what I was asking about)

I know the Bible speaks about it being better to remain single in order to serve the Lord but I was wondering does this speak to both men and women or more so to men? and If a young christian woman who loves the Lord desires to remain single and not marry do you think she should remain living at home with her parents or once of age move out on her own? Or find other single christian women to live with?

God Bless

Edit: sorry for my somewhat confusing post hope my follow up post better conveys what I was looking to share and learn from other about. God bless

 2011/12/26 14:40Profile

 Re: Should single women remain living at home

Sister I know you are asking a sincere question from your heart. But I groan in my spirit because you are going to get 10,000 different answers with the spirit of religion predominating.

But since I an one of the first to respond let me say you are FREE to do what God lays on your heart except sin. Seek his guidance. If you are led to stay at home, do so. If you are led to share a home with other sisters, do so. If you are led to live alone and finances permit, do so. The key here is do what Jesus says, not what others, which includes me, think you should do.

Just listen to his voice and he will lead you into the best living situation. But just do what Jesus says, not what the SI forum or church fathers say. Focus on Jesus.

Blaine Scogin

 2011/12/26 16:17

Joined: 2006/6/10
Posts: 668
Northern Rockies, BC, Canada

 Re: Should single women remain living at home

Curious to know what the motivation for the original question is?
I ask, only because I think, what happens in another person's own home is none of my business, except if, I'm asked to intervene by the owner of that household. And, if I'm asked to intervene, I will first go to the Lord, and ask Him, "Lord, what will thou have me to do concerning this?"
I say this in humility, and to spare one from being a busy-body who concerns themselves with other people's personal lives to their own destruction, and to bring a snare.
I, Do Not say that this is your case; but, I have found this to be the case of some from my own personal encounters with others.
I do apologize if I have somewhat strayed from the content of the original post.


 2011/12/26 16:54Profile

Joined: 2004/7/7
Posts: 7463

 Re: Should single women remain living at home


Since the WORD does not spell out where a single adult should live, I suggest this is between the single and the parent. Having said this, I would think that if the adult child is living with mom and dad he/she should assume some responsibility for living expenses instead of sponging off of his/her parents. The Scriptures say that if you do not work neither should you eat.

I know some are adamant about this issue but at the moment I find no spiritual principle that would teach us God's will in the matter.

What are you thinking about this, MJ?

Sandra Miller

 2011/12/26 17:03Profile

Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


ginnyrose asked:What are you thinking about this, MJ?

I was wondering what others thoughts where on this. I did not mean to give a wrong impression, I was not looking for advice on this topic for myself.(I am far from single and sadly no longer all that young(Smile)

Anyway my husband and I had gotten into a discussion about young people and marriage and that progressed into living for the Lord. His thoughts where that if I young woman chose not to marry then she should stay under her dads covering because that to him seemed Bibleical. I believe it was probably how things were done in the past. I realize cultural situation where different then now also. My boys whom are older still live with me and my husband(none are married but they do contribute) I have two neices who live with my sister still (not married but contritbute) I was thinking that todays society does seem to "push" young people out of the home rather young and I was wondering at this wisdom? SO I just thought I would ask some here their thougths. I realize in my haste to post before I was really vague sorry about that. I guess this was/is on my mind because we have recieved some criticisms for "allowing" our adult children to live with us and I just wondered what others thought. I realize though that once they persue marriages things will change and they will want to begin families and homes of their own but then I was thinking if God does not have that for them, then what. One of my neices in particular has expressed great desire and love for the Lord in wanting to serve Him and I do not think marriage(unless God showes her differently) will be in her future.

Of course every sitution is different was just more wondering what others were seeing on the topic.

God Bless

 2011/12/26 17:27Profile

Joined: 2011/3/8
Posts: 162


Dear Maryjane

Its an interesting conversation you had with your husband.I agree with Blaine that one ought to seek the Lord what to do as a single woman serving the Lord.

Personally I think it is wise for young single people to remain living with their parents and contributing finacially etc. I do believe that in so doing you are protected and lest likely to give into temptation especially fornicating. There is something about living with your parents that helps to keep one grounded and honaring their authority in one's life.

If a single woman lives alone God is her protector and head of her home, however what happens when she feels lonely or threatened being the weaker vessel. Also the word advocates that a single man will leave his mother and fathers house when he has found his wife to start his own family. Hence my preference would be to remain living with your parents but God had given each believer the freedom to choose where to live whilst serving Him.

love in Christ


 2011/12/26 20:25Profile

 Re: Should single women remain living at home

If she can stay at home, why not!

It all depends on the situation.

But lets say for the sake of argument that she is living with two loving Christian parents. They most likely would prefer to have her stay with them until she does decide to move out, but it would be completely her decision (if she is of a responsible age of course).

However, again, it depends on the situation. It's perfectly normal for a grown woman of 18 who desires to move out of her family's home and live with other girls or live alone.

The same applies for boys too.

But in this day and age, they most likely will end up coming back home because it's getting tougher financially.

 2011/12/26 21:37

Joined: 2007/9/13
Posts: 1752


I pray that our girls will want to stay and live with us until they are married. Our doors will always be open to having them live with us until they marry, if they do at all.

My wife and I will be leading them to stay until they are married. Yet, it is thier choice once they turn 18. Prayfully our love for them will lead them to stay.



 2011/12/26 23:33Profile

Joined: 2011/9/30
Posts: 1211


If Christ is living in your daughter then Christ will lead her.

If Christ is not living in your daughter and she will agree to stay home it may be good for her but only if Christ is living in you.

If Christ is not living in you or your daughter, you will lean upon your own understanding and rules to determine the outcome. Neither of your decisions will be directed by the Spirit.

If Christ is living in both of you, then together, both of you can ask Him what He desires. You need to hear His voice not a letter on a page. We don't live by rules.

"Church history has amply demonstrated that... The written record became absolutized. The prophetic spirit was quenched. The Christian Scripture became a rigid Christian Torah, a rule book for everything Christians must believe and teach. The gospel became a new law. Faith was confounded with orthodoxy, which was really theological legalism. The church ceased to be a charismatic community and became an institution. Instead of the Spirit there were rules. Instead of the priesthood of all believers there was wretched clericalism. Instead of the Spirit and presence of the living Christ there was religious canned goods. Instead of the living gospel there was dead ideology. Instead of freedom there was bondage. Yet, like the Pharisees, we have desperately tried to substitute an incredible devotion to the letter of Holy Scripture for the prophetic Spirit. Instead of having the certainty which the Spirit inspires, we have looked for certainty in endless apologetics and theories of textual inerrancy. (Robert D. Brinsmead, "The Gospel and the Spirit of Biblicism, Part I", The Christian Verdict, Essay 15, 1984. Fallbrook: Verdict Publications. Pg 9).

 2011/12/27 17:11Profile

Joined: 2008/10/25
Posts: 1196
North Central Florida


Martha, Mary and Lazarus lived together. No mention of the parents, that I recall. Or, if they had struck out on their own and bought a place together. I believe one of the reasons nothing has been said about it is that it really doesn't matter. Follow Jesus and He will direct your paths.


 2011/12/27 21:59Profile

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