| Ongoing feelings of radical change when born again...|
I was wondering about this, this morning.
When a person is born again and experiences the radical life changing power of Jesus Christ, how long do the "feelings" last for? What is "normal"?
For example when I was born again (16 yrs ago), It was on a scripture union camp and on the last night I was in a small room with a small group of others and we were being prayed for. I had known that I was interested in 'knowing God' and was blown away by the lives of real Christian and had started to know the Lord but I had not had made a full complete decision about giving up my whole life for following Jesus.
I spent a long time in prayer, wrestling with the Lord and myself...knowing what was asked of me and struggling to give up everything...after a time fo fervent prayer, I was able to picture a door and Someone knocking on that door and as the door opened suddenly, as I completely and fully gave up my heart to Jesus I felt the warmth of the Holy Spirit fall on me. It came from head to toe and then I was completely full of peace. The quiet stillness of the Lord came upon me.
My life was never the same since then. I was completely filled with passion for the Lord. All I wanted to do was read the Bible. Reading the Bible was like reading words of life to me. I felt this incredible love towards other people, that was just so overwhelming. I would get up early each morning, before school (i was 14 yrs old then) and read my Word, I couldn't get enough of it. I used to go off during school lunch breaks and pray with the Lord. All I wanted to do was be with the Lord in quiet time.
This was 16 yrs ago. I was not able to get plugged into a church back then and slowly over time I got distracted by the world. I always knew God and knew that I needed to be living fully for Him, but I started living for myself.
It was when I was 20 yrs old that I could not longer stand not being "right" again with the Lord and living away from the Lord, so I committed my life back again to living fully for Him, repenting of the backslidden life I had lived. This was 11 years ago now.
**My question is:
I always remember the Holy Spirit coming upon me when I gave my heart to Jesus and the radical change that happened and all the feelings of being so passionate for Jesus. BUT I just don't seem to be able to get back there again. Is it possible to ever feel like you did again when you first came to know the Lord? What is normal?
I know people say that you can't rely on feelings, but this was more than that, it was passion for Christ, the complete desire to be in His Word or in prayer to Him.
At the moment I am praying to the Lord fervently to ask Him whether I need to be filled anew with the Spirit...
Sometimes during my prayer time I wonder whether I am genuine or not. Then I stop my praying and check myself and get back on track with real proper prayer, not just going through the motions of asking for this and that & forgetting Who I am really praying to. But I catch myself doing this alot, slipping into a fake prayer.
What does normal look like? Should I try and pray to the Lord to take me back to those feelings of radical change or is this not normal to feel that way for the rest of your Christian walk?
I know that the Lord is with me, as I know His still, quiet presence. I feel it from time to time during the day and also when I read the Word, but I don't have the chunky time to spend with the Lord, I have a family and there are constantly distractions of life - teaching my daughter, cooking, etc...
I don't want it to be fake. I don't want hype. I know the real thing, I felt it 16 yrs ago...I just would love to hear if anyone knows what normal feels and looks like & whether I am just being unrealistic about my expectations.
Thank you all for your gracious love.
| 2011/6/14 14:28||Profile|
| Re: Ongoing feelings of radical change when born again...|
Quote: ""Is it possible to ever feel like you did again when you first came to know the Lord? What is normal?""
Is it possible to go back to the comfort and saftey of the womb. At conception for nine months we are secure and safe. At birth we start screaming. I don't want to go back there again. When I was a child I spoke as a child, when I became a man I speak as a man. We "feel" wonderful when we are first saved, then comes maturity and obedience, which we learn by the things we suffer, just like Jesus did. We don't want to get out of our comfort zone. But our Father won't let us stay there, He loves us to much. Paul said, "who will set me free from this body of death", he says, Praise God, Jesus Christ will.
Your mind is being renewed to the mind of Christ by the Holy Spirit and our Father wants us to be son's. Think about how confused we were and are even now, growing up and maturing, the same things come in Christ. Praise God, He will never leave us and will complete His work in us to the end. "All things happen to those that are in Christ for our upbuilding and Christ mindedness" and we are to give thanks in all things that happen to us, who are called according to His purpose and will for His children.
It does not feel good sometimes, but we are never to lose the knowing that we are new creatures in Christ, birthed of the Father, (born again) and He will complete the work He has begun in us. Praise God.
You are feeling growing pains. What a blessing, to know we are in Christ and He is in us and we are now son's of God being conformed to image of the Christ in us, "behold all things are become new".
In Christ: Phillip
| 2011/6/14 16:00||Profile|
| Re: Ongoing feelings of radical change when born again...|
**My question is: I always remember the Holy Spirit coming upon me when I gave my heart to Jesus and the radical change that happened and all the feelings of being so passionate for Jesus. BUT I just don't seem to be able to get back there again. Is it possible to ever feel like you did again when you first came to know the Lord? What is normal?
You got one answer that may have seemed somewhat of a "no". And I agree, no human can ever go back into the womb.
However, the love, the joy, the holiness, the cleanness of salvation . . . I believe God's mercies are new every morning and even more than his mercies, his freshness and the joy of walking with him and serving him and preparing for eternity with him . . . in a word YES! You can know the beauty of the "honeymoon". But, I picked this word carefully. Only one in a hundred married couples stay in love as much as the day they were married, and it is the same with Christians. Yes, there are ups and downs, but some married couples do stay in that beautiful place and some Christians do as well.
Both cases are the same. Where are your heart and your thoughts and what are you living for? If you love God, live for him, and center your life around him, you can and will know that joy! May you have grace to enter in.
| 2011/6/14 19:48||Profile|
| Re: |
Yes thank you both,
What concerns me is that I know at that time when I gave my life to the Lord that everything in my life was about Him. I know that this is difficult to maintain as we all live in the world & have alot of distractions. So the overwhelming feelings dissipate over time, but the focus of all my efforts in the world need to be about Christ.
I just wondered whether all my sinful behaviour in living away from the Lord would permanently affect what happened initially? Of course I have repented from all that stuff and live completely for Christ now BUT I just wondered whether I need to press again fervently into prayer to get back to that. I just wondered whether i am not spending enough time in prayer or fervently enough...as when I was converted it was only after being in fervent, hard core, pleading prayer with the Lord before I got saved and the Holy Spirit fell on me.
Having such a full on conversion is a double edged sword in way. Are all other Christian's conversions like this? Or are some unable to even say the date they got saved?
Thanks for answering all the questions.
| 2011/6/15 2:33||Profile|