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 having trouble with internet pornography?

I don't understand why there is so little direct addressing of the issue of internet porn in the church. As pastors you know that the church is loaded with it as are the pastors. Everyday Pastors and parishioners alike are losing their ministries, the marriages and their reputations to this but still no one will discuss it in the pulpit in any meaningful way.

I had issues with internet porn and finally found that there are ways to put a wall around myself as well as add accountability support which has kept me clean from it. A large number of ministers (estimated at 40% of ministers who access th einternet) and estimated half of the men in the congregations are using it yet little is said. This is an 800 pound gorilla in the room.

There are many ways of approaching this issue...is anyone interested? Blessings- Ned

 2010/11/17 13:07
Areadymind
Member



Joined: 2009/5/15
Posts: 1042
Pacific Ocean

 Re: having trouble with internet pornography?

Accountability helps but the greatest help is the fruit of the Spirit which is self-control.


_________________
Jeremiah Dusenberry

 2010/11/17 13:21Profile
Shamefaced
Member



Joined: 2009/12/28
Posts: 34


 Re:

I've been interested in this topic for awhile; why are Christian men tempted to view pornography? It seems to simplistic to say "they are consumed by lust and their depraved nature". Though there may be some truth to the aforementioned statement, has it been considered that the temptation to view pornography may spring from a lack of intimacy in their marriage? Since emotional and sexual intimacy is often on par with one another in the male psyche, lack of intimacy (more than just sexual) may result in seeking percieved intimacy from pornography. Loss of intimacy can result from many different causes: illness of a spouse, marital problems, behavioral problems of a spouse, ect... This is not an excuse to view pornography by any means but rather an opportunity to assess some of the root causes of this issue.

 2010/11/17 13:34Profile
Renoncer
Member



Joined: 2010/6/26
Posts: 482


 Re:

The root of this sin is the same as all other sins: the sinful nature. Man's depravity because of the fall of Adam causes innumerable sins, including sexual immorality.

So, how do we deal with sexual immorality? The same way we deal with all other sins: Die to self, live in Christ. Die to lust and sexual immorality, live in Christ and self-control.

By the Spirit, put this sin to death, as you do all other sins. The Word of God is the sword of the Spirit. Thus, whatever temptation, sin, attack, or challenge you must overcome, hold on to God's Word regarding this issue. Know what God says about it; hold on to it by faith.

Faith in Christ is your victory. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of Christ. Abide in Him. Pray until you have victory. If you feel weak, call someone to pray with you. Let us carry each other's burdens, helping one another. This is not about being "accountable" to someone else; this is about helping one another in the fight.

 2010/11/17 14:05Profile
PQ
Member



Joined: 2009/12/6
Posts: 101
Europe

 Re: having trouble with internet pornography?

Keith Daniel talked about the 'second look'... the enemy may tempt with the first look but the 'second look' is entirely up to us.
He went on to say, you cannot take the 'second look' if you are soaking yourself in the Word of GOD.

Paul said in 1 Corinthians 6:3 - Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this life!

How do one expect to judge angels if the angels are seeing them viewing unclean images.

"You are as holy as you want to be, any minister that tell you otherwise is a liar."


PQ*


_________________
PQ

 2010/11/17 14:10Profile
twayneb
Member



Joined: 2009/4/5
Posts: 2002
Joplin, Missouri

 Re:

Quote:
The root of this sin is the same as all other sins: the sinful nature. Man's depravity because of the fall of Adam causes innumerable sins, including sexual immorality.



Renouncer: What you say is true. There would be no problem with sin if it were not for sin. :-) And there is great power in realizing that we are dead with Christ indeed unto sin. This realization that it is through God's grace that we have the power over sin and can reckon ourselves dead indeed to sin is key, I think, to victory.

I do want to throw another element into this discussion though. Often there are issues behind the issue. I have rarely encountered a Christian man who is struggling with pornography that does not have much deeper issues that they need God's healing and deliverance from. In other words, porn is rarely the problem, but is usually a symptom of the problem. I would say that most men I have encountered who are having problems in this area have had great damage to their souls from rejection. Most who have problems in their marriages with true intimacy (not at all limited to sexual intimacy) have these issues in their lives. These are things that they need God to step in and heal, and often they have never allowed even God to come that close to them. I am not talking psychology here, but rather wounds of the emotions and mind that God must heal. It has been my experience that when this stronghold is brought down, the symptom of addiction to pornography falls as well.

Although we are born again in the Spirit, we are all living in the flesh (that is in a physical body with mind, will, and emotions that are not redeemed yet). We are transformed in our soul (mind, will, emotions) by the renewing of the mind through the word and etc., but that is a process that will never be completed until Christ returns. We will still battle with temptations of the mind and flesh. So it is important that we have close relationships with other men of God who we can be accountable to and strengthened in the Lord. But for the addictive behavior it is much prayer and discernment that is needed to determine what strongholds need to come down to see a man delivered from this thing.


_________________
Travis

 2010/11/17 14:37Profile









 Did you know that porn use is the fastest growing cause of divorce?

I Love the discussion regarding the motivation regarding porn use. It us clearly sin but is clearly one that is pillaging the church and the ministry. It is so under wraps that most users think they are the only pervert in the room rather than the other way around. When I have addressed my church I am stunned by the number of men who have come out saying that they did not know that this is a common issue (one out of every two men in the pew!) They will all acknowledge this as sin and then wonder what they can do.

There are great tools including excellent filters with acocuntability programs but no one will talk about it. If the issue is framed as porn "addiction" then again many will not come forth since they don't see it as an "addiction". But it must be talked about and in a big way...if you want a sepaker then let me know but let's get this on the plate.

 2010/11/17 15:41
ginnyrose
Member



Joined: 2004/7/7
Posts: 7471
Mississippi

 Re: Did you know that porn use is the fastest growing cause of divorce?

Believe it or not, this a growing problem with females. This problem is no longer confined to males.

Seems to me the devil knows his time is getting shorter and he is getting desperate and no longer is as subtle in his deception as he once was. It is flagrant, bold, public and unashamed.

This should tell us something..but then the younger generation is not aware of these subtle changes because they have not seen life from a perspective of many years.

ginnyrose


_________________
Sandra Miller

 2010/11/17 16:16Profile
Shamefaced
Member



Joined: 2009/12/28
Posts: 34


 Re:

Twayneb,
I concur with your post :) As I said, it's too easy to write it off by saying "You need to stop your sinful behavior!". Obviously. Instead let's strike at the root and not minimize the emotional needs that many Christians have.

 2010/11/17 16:26Profile









 tools to stop internet porn use

I have found that filtering (without an over ride password) and accuntability reporting (someone can see where I surf) is a great solution, "a way of escape".

Filtering alone is like the the Law-it becomes the power of sin, something to be gotten around...but combine it with somoneone able to see you surfing history then the darkness must flee...and it does. Even though we know that the Lord is watching everything, somehow the thought that someone with "skin on" is watching makes the difference. If you knew your wife was watching you then it would be unlikely that you would go to the porn sites, or your pastor or best friend.....

 2010/11/17 18:13





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