This is John again, i just wanted to update you about my problem. I have sought the scriptures more and have tried to forsake the world etc. I still read the scriptures with so many doubts and problems and conflicts in my mind with the gospels, it is really making me go crazy why does their have to be small differences in them it would make it so easier if their wasn't. I know satan is doing this to me, i have sought the Lord for deliverance and have kept reading but i still here these voices and it has reached down in my heart at times where i start to really disbelieve. I can never take away what Christ did when he healed me 6 years ago and changed my heart for a time. But the scriptures our true sexual sin can harden your heart severely and even blind you from the truth. I hate being like this, i also recently this week have been fighting with the doubting of Gods existence, it was like i was blinded to see the truth. It really is taking a toll on me, i just want o believe without doubt and be saved for sure having assurance. I am sick of the hardened heart and the disbelieve. I fear that i might have been a bad seed on the rocky soil or the one choked by the thorns i am pretty sure i am. I have never said i wanted nothing to do with Christ or anything, i have never gave up on him, i just have slowly started to disbelieve and grown a hardened heart , is it because the holy spirit is slowly leaving me i don't know but i can do nothing but seek him. It is all i want and hate my life otherwise. I really don't understand how i can seek God and grow harder and pray like a mad man and cry and ask so many people to pray and still grow harder and fall away, maybe i was never saved and satan is doing this to destroy me but God maybe will have mercy and save me before satan completley destroys me and i fall away forever, i don't know but i hope. You know i was reading those 3 scary verses in hebrews in ch. 3 and ch. 6 and ch. 10 and wa just reading in hebrews in general and i truly believe Paul wrote hebrews but he quotes some of the old testament verses in ezekiel 36 about the new heart and mind, and God making a covenat that won't fall and him putting the fear of God in us so that we won't leave. You know what Paul is saying by putting a believer with that scripture, it is saying that you if you truly have been saved can't lose your salvation, i say that because those old testament verses in ezekiel and jeremiah clearly state we won't leave the Lord. But no doctrinal arguments here. Please keep in prayer that the Lord humbles me and convicts and reveals my sinfulness to me and that i truly become born again. I really appreciate the prayers. God bless you john.
| 2010/4/27 2:02||Profile|
| Re: prayer|
I most certianly will be praying for you. I listened to a Sermon by Paris Reidhead about Victory I think called Victory its apart of his So great Salvation series. He explains that we have three common enemies Self, the World, Satan (the prince of this world) We can defeat Self by identify ourselves with the Cross we must believe that on the Day Christ Jesus was nailed to the Cross that WE are on the Back of it nailed on the Cross with him, Our victory over self is a death on the Cross daily. Our victory over the World ie the Pleasures of this world can be found in the tomb of Jesus. A man that is already dead has no concern for worldly things and worldly pleasure they are dead, You just try and sale something to a dead corpse it doesn't appeal the dead man. And Our Victory over Satan is through the Resurrection of Jesus Christ that HE defeat Satan, striped him of his power, and took the sting of Death from him.
If you are identifying with the Cross and being on that Cross, then you can naturally identify with the Christ in the tomb, and You can then graciously identify with the RISEN and Victorious Christ Jesus. I suggest you listen to the Paris Reidhead Sermon on Victory it explains it better than I and in more depth.
Your post also reminds me of the Story of the man that wanted Jesus to cast out the demon in a boy in Mark 9
the Man at the end of it all exclaims "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!" If you wish to overcome this unbelief you will only be able to do it through Christ Jesus. BUT it all starts with a death on the cross.
| 2010/4/27 2:20||Profile|
| Re: prayer|
Why the user name?
| 2010/4/27 4:30||Profile|
| Re: prayer|
Yes, you were saved. You were healed weren't you?
This is all part of the salvation package.
If you were not saved, would "the sin that so easily besets..." really bother you like it does right now? It shows you that God's Spirit is working to purify you and make you like Him.
Read Col. 2:6 and 7.
Really, Col. 2:6,7,8,9,10ESV
Think about how you recieved Christ.
Taking up our cross starts by looking at things the way God sees and says them. This is how are set aside for God's purposes. WE ALL begin to take on the nature of God when we do this.
Keep on reading your Bible, because no matter what your mind and your flesh may be saying to you, when you keep on believing God, there is nothing in the world including the devil that can stop you. Go with God and what He thinks, and ignore your flesh and what it thinks.
There are some sins that take time in the overcoming, but, Jesus will make it possible to happen, just like the first time if you only continue in Him, remain in Him, abide in Him.
Col. 2:6, Jn. 17:17,14:1,15:3,4,5
You just do your part, forget about everything else that says different than what God has already done for you, continue in Him, and He WILL take care of the rest.
In James 1:12 it says that we are blessed when we endure temptation. after that it says "when", not if or if you do not. It means that sometimes it takes time.
You see what manner of man you are because God has pointed this out to you through his word- continue and the change will come.
When your flesh is dead, those thoughts become just echoes from the past.
We all go through what you are going through in some way.
Never give up on God will never give up on you.
The further we grow into Him, the harder it becomes in our own strength. Consider your self dead and the life of Jesus will arise from within you. This is just the beginnings of ressurection power, like when you were saved the first time. He is just teaching us to rely and put more and more confidence in Him, believing He will do what He says He will do.
| 2010/4/27 5:56||Profile|
| Re: |
PRAISE THE LORD AND PASS THE AMMUNITION...
where's my Bible?
| 2010/4/27 6:02|
| Re: prayer|
i will pray for you brother.
From what you have posted it's clearly seen that God is working with you.You are in His nahds at this very moment.Glory be to Him for His unfailing love!!!
| 2010/4/27 8:20||Profile|