No - we are called to be servants not subservient.
I suffered years of abuse all my teenage life by a deacon in my family church.
As a result I had no confidence, no self esteem and felt I was always on the outside looking in on life.
I desperately wanted to be liked and appreciated.
Due to this fear of being disliked I would and could never say 'no' - no matter how much it put me out ot trouble it caused.
I was in such bondage as to what people thought of me and was the ultimate doormat of all doormats!
What started to strengthen me was in 1995 having to make a stand against strange manifestations and teachings that crept into a little church that my husband and I were on the ministry team of, and eventually due to extreme pressure had to leave.
My life was then filled with a sense of worth and being needed by being asked to work voluntarily at the local Police station.
I gained so much respect for my quality of work that in no time I was in charge of recruiting and training staff, training police, and had such responsibility and trust among all departments.
I would never turn a job down and nothing was too much trouble.
For five years I was promised a full time paid job - which I did eventually win. On going full time I had to cut my hours down - as i was doing too many! I also ended up with a new sarg who hated me and was determined to get rid of me.
I suffered him and his abuse for a year and he lost me my dream job, which he had told me on our first meeting that he would do!
I then found out that a WPC on my team had been undermining me, by coming to me with problems she was having with this sarg, but then repeating back to him my sympathies for her.
When this led to me losing my job, she then realised she would have to take on my work as well as her own and cried, begging me to continue working voluntarily again to help her out as she wouldn't cope without me.
This was too much for me, the police I worked with were devastated at losing me, but told me that if I continued my work there after all the bullying I had suffered, they would lose all respect for me - as I would be showing no respect for myself!!
This was a lightbulb moment, I never saw it that way before! We teach people how to treat us by what we allow!
You have no idea how liberating it was for me to talk to that WPC and say 'no way!'to her. When she started in tears I then told her that she had never supported me when I needed it and it was all her fault that I was leaving, so in no way would I help her now, she had to take the consequences of her actions.
It was such a release and so empowering for me, I'd done it, I'd stood up for myself and I've not looked back!
The following week the police area superintendent who is a Christian, called in and asked where I was, he was then asked by the Police I worked with 'do you seriously expect her to be here after the way she has been treated!'
He relied 'No, I would have been surprised if she was here
but I've been praying for her and was so concerned for her.
Now I've had strength from God to deal with Goliaths in my life - to right the wrongs and to stand up and be free of what people think of me if I say 'no'
Even taking part in these discussions and sharing my opinions with you all is a miracle in my life. I was once the quiet one who kept everything locked away inside - so afraid of people would think of me! but now people around me have grown closer to me and there is such respect for me, and now if I do say 'no' to anything, there's no problem.