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MaryJane
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Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


 IF a person...

If a person is extremely introverted, likes to be by themselves, does not like large groups of people and has a really hard time giving of themselves would this be consider sinful behavior? If so how would you share with a person who has been this way for most of their life and just does not seem to want to do anything about it?

God Bless
mj

 2009/12/15 12:31Profile
sermonindex
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Joined: 2002/12/11
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 Re: IF a person...

It could be sinful in some areas but I would encourage possibly it could be they are gifted for intercession and ministering to the Lord perhaps. I know some people like that that were released into such a ministry because of their God given character type.

I have some introverted qualities that allows me to work on sermonindex.net that in many ways would not have happened if I was a different character type.


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SI Moderator - Greg Gordon

 2009/12/15 12:36Profile
Areadymind
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Joined: 2009/5/15
Posts: 1042
Pacific Ocean

 Re: IF a person...

Jesus very often fled crowds to be alone, spent lots of time in the mornings alone, left the disciples to be alone...it is always an issue of the heart. If the person is alone and not redeeming the time it could be sin, but like Greg said, if it is a function the Lord is moving in, God forbid that it be forbidden. Moses learned to turn and look when he was alone, Paul got revelation from Jesus about the Gospel he was to preach when he was alone. Jonah burst forth the most powerful one sentence sermon after being in the very depths of forced privacy. God graciously humbles himself and works through the foibles of his servants even if it is a personality quark. Had I my choice I would myself live in a cave, but God repeatedly sees fit to take me out of it.

With every person though, discernment and leading of the Spirit is essential. If you feel compelled to talk to this person about it, do it in a spirit of humility and not one of condescension.


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Jeremiah Dusenberry

 2009/12/15 12:47Profile
MaryJane
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Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


 Re:

What if this person is unwilling at times to even extend themselves to family around them, even their own spouse or children?

I appreciate what you have shared but I wonder can this character type be taken to an extreme and even used as an excuse so that this person could remain doing and being in an environment that is comfortable to them? IF they struggle with emotion of any kind and have difficulty sharing them with others even those who would be closest to them? Do you think this is an issue that should be addressed in any way?

Thanks
mj

 2009/12/15 13:04Profile
sojourner7
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Joined: 2007/6/27
Posts: 1573
Omaha, NE

 Re:

GOD will often times put us in situations
where we have to come out of our "comfort zone."
If Jesus is dear and precious to your heart;
wouldn't you want to share this wonderful
News with others ??


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Martin G. Smith

 2009/12/15 14:58Profile









 Re:

HI MaryJane, discernment can be eveything as has already been stated. You say this person is

"unwilling at times to even extend themselves to family around them, even their own spouse or children?"

I have known some wonderful introrverts. When they are engaged, they can still be warm and loving and Christlike. They just do not care to engage or have to pull back after engagements and re-focus. That is one thing. Another is the man(typically the man, but not always) who is "unable," as opposed to unwilling, to engage his wife or children, never mind a wider circle.

Now this man's problem lies in his heart. It can typically(not always) be traced back to the childhood and the way he himself was raised. Its almost like a gererational curse(not overly comfortable with that phrase but it may work here)

The answer, as always, is engagement with God the Father through Christ the Son. Now, for the pesron involved, there must be a desire on some level to want to change, an acknowledgement of this behaviour. If the person refuses to talk about or acknowledge the behaviour(this frequently happens) then , as always, we must pray.

These matters of the heart, go straight to the heart of people. It shapes them, it shapes the children they raise, it shapes the relationship they have with their spouse, it shapes everything around them. Yet, the problem lies in reaching them, for often they have a gruff or stony exterior that frightens most away.

Yet only those with the eyes of the lord can truly see that these people are in many ways chained, and are, at their core, extremly vulnerable and sensitive, which is why they cover it up with the opposite behaviour. The Lord wants and desires to set these people free. Sactification is a process for all of God's children.............Frank

 2009/12/15 14:59
MaryJane
Member



Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


 Re:

Greetings Frank and Sojourner7

You wrote:That is one thing. Another is the man(typically the man, but not always) who is "unable," as opposed to unwilling, to engage his wife or children, never mind a wider circle.
___

This person has said they know that this is an issue in their life, and yet they remain as they are, they do make any attempt to move forward or stop the behavior? IF they pray about this or seek the Lord to change I do not know because they share nothing of their personal walk with Christ. Prayer, Bible reading and study is done completely by themselves.

This does make things difficult for those around them because their are children who really need the guidance and yet none is given.

Thank you for sharing your insights I guess I am wondering how to share with this person who says that they know they are this way, knows that it is an issue(not sure they consider it sin or not) but after years and years there is no change or growth? I do think their is a desire in the heart of this person but as I said it has been years and years almost a lifetime really??

Sojourner7 your wrote:If Jesus is dear and precious to your heart;
wouldn't you want to share this wonderful
News with others ??
___

I thought so, I think that is why this is so hard for me and confusing because I know this person loves the Lord and yet their so closed off, even with their own family at times?
God Bless
mj

 2009/12/15 16:13Profile
Areadymind
Member



Joined: 2009/5/15
Posts: 1042
Pacific Ocean

 Re:

The reason I am not willing to say it is outright sin is because it could be and it could not be...Gray areas must be tread upon lightly. The leading of the Spirit, and Prayer...tons of prayer cannot be replaced in these types of situations. My wife prayed for me for years to be delivered from the gray shadow lands and God honored her prayers, but not a single one of her rebukes during that time did an ounce of good. It was only when she set to praying that I began to come out of my cave. I am identical to the person you are describing. God has re-granted me the times of aloneness but only because those times are now redemptive, whereas before they were selfish.

I do know that the effective fervent prayers of the righteous availeth much.

To often these are the answers that scripture gives us.


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Jeremiah Dusenberry

 2009/12/15 16:34Profile
MaryJane
Member



Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


 Re:

Greetings Areadymind

You said that your not willing to say it is sin because it is a gray area. I understand what you are saying but at the same time when I see the effects on the children who are given rules to follow, who are told to read the Bible but yet have no other involvement from this parent I think it does become sin. Its no longer them just wanting to be alone and away from people, others are directly effected. Just to let you know this person has been prayed for and continues to be. At this time no one is sharing with this person on this issue so they are not being rebuked at all, that is part of the reason I asked the question:-)

I agree though prayer of course is the best answer, I do often worry about the children involved though, one in particular seems to be following in the example that is being set by this person.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

God Bless
mj

 2009/12/15 16:47Profile









 Re: IF a person...

In my early days I was extremely introverted, today I am both Intro and Extro. There are some people that enjoy being alone. They may even enjoy the occasional gathering, but even there they'd keep to themselves. When I was extremely introvert, I'd be in large groups and I was content that everyone was having a good time. Sometimes I'd find a hole to crawl into, I enjoyed hearing the sounds of laughter and talking, but I'd just preferred to be alone. I started to come out of my shell when I started to hang around with a friend who was extremely extrovert. I developed character hanging around him. I learned to be open, vocal and have charisma. Today, though I am more intro lately, but when I am out of the house, I am quite extro.

Now when I was an extreme intro, I had some major issues that I was battling with at the time. When your heavily into pornography and the sexual sins that accompany that one can be an introvert because of that. There is shame attached to these types of sin and being open is one thing that intros don't want to do, so they climb further into themselves and really it's self destruction. It's a constant abuse of self and if your married it can really wreck havoc. My Sister is going through the final states of divorce on account of this very reason. Her husband who is an introvert, brought this into the marriage hoping that marriage would save him. He had a secret life on the computer and paying for services with local women. This went on for the duration of their 10 year marriage until he was caught. She gave him many chances to get things right, but he went right back at it. He said he feels relief now that his secret is in the open, but it cost him his marriage.

So there are some good valid reasons why people are intros, but then there is a lot of people that are intros and are bound in secret sin.

 2009/12/15 17:04





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