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Jdl
Member



Joined: 2009/9/21
Posts: 66


 need guidance about something

Hi everyone...I was the one who had posted the recent thread about doubt...I am in need of some advice about something...
I have hopelessly fallen for a good, godly girl, but I can't do anything about it because of my spiritual state amidst all my doubts (I don't think I'm a believer)...I have a yearning desire to be a good, godly husband, and to raise a godly family...I'm just scared that these doubts I have will never go away, and thus I can never partake in a relationship because of them...has anybody had a similar type of experience? My heart aches over this, I don't know how to approach the situation


_________________
James

 2009/9/24 9:36Profile
sojourner7
Member



Joined: 2007/6/27
Posts: 1573
Omaha, NE

 Re: need guidance about something

The first and most important and necessary
relationship is your relationship with GOD!
HE must come first in your heart and life.
When you have established a friendship and
walk with GOD; everything else will fall into
place. Why not trust HIM and see??


_________________
Martin G. Smith

 2009/9/24 11:48Profile
Jdl
Member



Joined: 2009/9/21
Posts: 66


 Re:

There is something I am confused about as far as a relationship with God...the bible says our hearts are at enmity with God...in fact, as I have examined my own heart, I have come to painfully realize that there are aspects of the God of the bible that I hate...He wants us to love Him...so my question is, do I willfully love Him and obey Him while disreagrding the hatred in my heart (a hatred that I am ashamed of), or do I plead with Him to give me a new heart that will love Him...in other words, does God give us a choice to follow Him and love Him, or does He place in our hearts a desire to love Him and follow Him...If it was my choice, I would like to follow Him and love Him, but I fear it would be fake, given the hatred that I harbor...any ideas?


_________________
James

 2009/9/24 12:05Profile
Leo_Grace
Member



Joined: 2009/6/14
Posts: 703


 Re:

Quote:

Jdl wrote:
There is something I am confused about as far as a relationship with God...the bible says our hearts are at enmity with God...in fact, as I have examined my own heart, [b]I have come to painfully realize that there are aspects of the God of the bible that I hate[/b]...He wants us to love Him...so my question is, do I willfully love Him and obey Him while disreagrding the hatred in my heart (a hatred that I am ashamed of), or do I plead with Him to give me a new heart that will love Him...in other words, does God give us a choice to follow Him and love Him, or does He place in our hearts a desire to love Him and follow Him...If it was my choice, I would like to follow Him and love Him, but I fear it would be fake, given the hatred that I harbor...any ideas?



Jdl, please explain to us the basis of your hatred towards God.

 2009/9/24 12:20Profile
Jdl
Member



Joined: 2009/9/21
Posts: 66


 Re:

Hi Leo...I think maybe perhaps this is wut is causing my doubts about His existence, ya know? I don't want to hate Him, that's for sure, and I hate that I hate Him...I guess it stems from the whole idea of hell and it being eternal torment...I guess I don't agree with it...I fear that I haven't been brought under enough conviction of my sin to realize that I am deserving of going there...I mean, I know it theologically , but I can't seem to get it into my bloodstream...I guess also I wish God should save everyone...I hate that I have a big family and there's a chance that me or any of them may be damned...for a while I was trying to rid myself of these thoughts but to no avail...I mean, I want to get on with my life as one who loves God and relies on Him, but how can I ever do that with these awful thoughts and doubts to go with them?


_________________
James

 2009/9/24 12:38Profile
sojourner7
Member



Joined: 2007/6/27
Posts: 1573
Omaha, NE

 Re:

GOD is not man; and HE does not lie. You
can rely upon His Word and His wisdom.
Spend more time with the truth of the
scriptures and less time with your doubts
and fears.


_________________
Martin G. Smith

 2009/9/24 13:01Profile
Leo_Grace
Member



Joined: 2009/6/14
Posts: 703


 Re:

Quote:

Jdl wrote:
Hi Leo...I think maybe perhaps this is wut is causing my doubts about His existence, ya know? I don't want to hate Him, that's for sure, and I hate that I hate Him...I guess it stems from the whole idea of hell and it being eternal torment...I guess I don't agree with it...I fear that I haven't been brought under enough conviction of my sin to realize that I am deserving of going there...I mean, I know it theologically , but I can't seem to get it into my bloodstream...I guess also I wish God should save everyone...I hate that I have a big family and there's a chance that me or any of them may be damned...for a while I was trying to rid myself of these thoughts but to no avail...I mean, I want to get on with my life as one who loves God and relies on Him, but how can I ever do that with these awful thoughts and doubts to go with them?



Jdl, you said that you want to love God, and that you don't want to hate him. What have you done to accomplish this? Have you sat down and earnestly read the Bible to get to know God? God is love. He is also just and holy. You have to read the Bible to understand these things.

 2009/9/24 13:43Profile
Theophila
Member



Joined: 2007/1/15
Posts: 364


 Re: need guidance about something

Hi Brother,
Have you considered that the devil may be the one whispering these awful thoughts to your mind, passing them off as your own?
There's a reason he's called the accuser of the brethren. He also accuses God before humanity and then turns around and harrasses them about it!

It appears you desire to love God and serve Him; we can safely believe that is He is pleased with that. Sir, the blessed Holy Spirit of God NEVER harasses us; He brings us conviction NEVER HARASSMENT. He is our Shepherd. Shepherds lead sheep, they do not drive them.

These thoughts seem to bombard you without your consent, leaving you doubtful and fearful of your standing before God.

- When and how did you come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ?
- When was the first time you 'had' these thoughts?

What to do?
1] I would ferret out Scriptures which speak of my righteousness [right standing with God] and justification and think/meditate on them, asking the Author to help me understand them. Here are a few to help you get started.
- Romans 5:1-2
- II Corinthians 5: 17
- Galatians 3:13-14
- Galatians 5:1

2] I would pray the same prayer the Apostle Paul prayed for his converts so they would become firmly established in Christ.
- Ephesians 1:16 - 19
- Ephesians 3:16 - 19
- Phillipians 1: 9 - 11
- Colossians 1: 9 - 14
I personalize them. e.g. In Eph. 1, i say something like, dear Father, thank you for calling me your own, for saving me. I ask that you give me the spirit of wisdom and revelation so i can know you better. i pray that the eyes of my heart and mind be enlightened so i may know the reason why you've called me and what i'm to do about it....etc.

If you would consistently do this for the next 30 days, you will notice a difference in your thoughts. They will quiet down. Why? Because you took the sword of the Spirit, calmed your own soul [Ps 19:7-9] and squashed the enemy's arguments against your [II Corinthians 10:3-5]

How do I know this will work? Because I have experienced victory through His Word. God's word is true. Halleluyah!

Look at this way, some day soon, you'll helping some other pilgrim along the way...that's a cool vision to look forward to.

Please keep me posted.

IT IS WELL with you.



_________________
Tolu

 2009/9/24 15:20Profile
MaryJane
Member



Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


 Re:

Greetings Jdl

May I say that from your post you write as if you have no control over your choices or behavior. This is a lie from the enemy because you not only have control over these choices apart from Christ you are responsible for these choices. Did you read what I shared with you on your other thread about having no excuses? Each of us has family or friends who have by choice decided to live their lives for self and reject Jesus.I have several brothers and sisters and only one of them is saved. Although I love my family I know that if they should die rejecting Christ, then by their own actions they have brought the punishment of hell and eternal separation from God upon themselves. It is not Gods will that any should parish that is why He sent His only son to suffer and die for our sins.It is not Gods fault that men choose to reject the gift of salvation that Christs suffering and death offers to them.
I thought I would share with you a portion of an article here about "Not Harding our hearts."
__________________
Harden Not Your Heart

Since it is a COMMAND to not “harden our hearts” to Him, or to His Life and Truth, it must be possible to “obey” or “disobey” His Command to “harden not our hearts.” Father can’t command us to do something that we have no control over. That’s obvious, to even the least intelligent adult or the youngest child. If He has Commanded something, it can be obeyed or disobeyed. Paul the apostle said, “Therefore king Agrippa, I was not DISOBEDIENT to the vision from Heaven.” We have choices—whenever Father Commands us to do, or not do, something. We are “without excuse” for that very reason. We are created in His Image. This means, amongst a number of other glorious things, that we are given the Grace (the Provision and Possibility and Ability, by His enabling) to CHOOSE whether to obey or disobey—love or hate—to soften or to harden.

____

Will keep you in my prayers.
God Bless
mj

 2009/9/24 15:26Profile
Jdl
Member



Joined: 2009/9/21
Posts: 66


 Re:

Hi Mary and Theophila...I thought I had come to a saving relationship with Jesus about two years ago...I lived a reformed life, but i fear it was only external and no change of the heart...now I have found myself in a state of doubting and unbelief...

Mary, I guess part of me gets confused about what our responsibility is and what God's part is...I fear that it isn't up to us when we can be saved, because God is the one who does the saving...that's why I feel like I can't force myself to love God until He gives me a new heart that loves Him, otherwise it would be fake, and He wouldn't accept it...Reformed doctrine tells me I can't conjure up faith and love on my own, that only God does that for us, since our hearts are depraved and wicked...so I had been asking Him to give me a new one to love and serve Him...I guess these thoughts of hatred began surfacing within the past couple months...I'm just so confused...
I don't want to reject Christ, but sometimes I hear from certain people that I am not allowed to go to Him unless I have felt the burden of my sin enough...or unless I have seen myself as a monster of a wicked person...I guess like I said, I need to be convicted more before I can approach Him...altho now with all these doubts I feel like I'm back to square one


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James

 2009/9/24 16:27Profile





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