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Discussion Forum : General Topics : Marrying The Same Person Twice?

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BenWilliams
Member



Joined: 2006/12/11
Posts: 351
El Paso, Texas

 Marrying The Same Person Twice?

Ok guys, I am curious what ya'll think about this.


In our culture here in America, divorce is becoming more and more common place. And then also people getting re-married to another person similarly common.

It is completely obvious by the scripture that if you are divorced, and you marry another person, that you are committing adultery if your first spouse is still alive.

What I want to bring up, is the issue of people who get divorced, and then later re-marry each other. This practice seems widely accepted, even by churches, as though it is somehow good and holy for it to take place.

[b]Now, the question I am asking about this issue is this, How is marrying the same person a second time any different than going and marrying another person? Does anyone considered this to be adultery?[/b]

Now I have considered the fact that say the two people never marry anyone else, they just got a divorce, and then they later re-marry. I am not certain there is any problem with this situation. But what still seems to be embraced just as much, are situations where a couple divorces, one or both of them re-marry, divorce again, and then are re-married to each other.

[b]Although in the first question, it may or may not be adultery, I believe it is most certainly adultery in the second example. Anyone's thoughts on this topic?[/b]


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Benjamin Williams

 2007/3/16 13:27Profile
PreachParsly
Member



Joined: 2005/1/14
Posts: 2164
Arkansas

 Re: Marrying The Same Person Twice?

Quote:
But what still seems to be embraced just as much, are situations where a couple divorces, one or both of them re-marry, divorce again, and then are re-married to each other.



The Bible tells us what it is if someone divorces, remarries, and goes back to the first.

Deu 24:1 ¶ When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give [it] in her hand, and send her out of his house.


Deu 24:2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's [wife].


Deu 24:3 And [if] the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth [it] in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her [to be] his wife;


Deu 24:4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; [b]for that [is] abomination before the LORD: [/b]and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee [for] an inheritance.


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Josh Parsley

 2007/3/16 13:41Profile









 Re: Marrying The Same Person Twice?

Quote:
It is completely obvious by the scripture that if you are divorced, and you marry another person, that you are committing adultery if your first spouse is still alive.



This is not entirely true... go back and read scripture again. There are specific circumstances under which remarriage is ok according to scripture. (1 Cor. 7:15 & Matt 19:9)

Quote:
Now, the question I am asking about this issue is this, How is marrying the same person a second time any different than going and marrying another person? Does anyone considered this to be adultery?



In order for there to be adultry in the eyes of God, then God must not recognize the divorce as vaild. In other words, God is holding the couple to their original vows and not accepting their divorce as legitimate. Therefore, if they get a (worldly) divorce (other than when it is allowed in scripture) God still continues to consider them bound together. Their divorce means nothing to Him.

So, if they remarry... God never considered them divorced in the first place.

Simple as that.

Now, if they divorce, remarry someone else, divorce again, and then remarry the original spouse... that gets a bit sticky. But we can "what if" all day long. I would suggest that if this does not directly effect you... dont worry about it.

Krispy

 2007/3/16 14:03
blinx
Member



Joined: 2006/10/10
Posts: 57
Oeiras, Portugal

 Re:

To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

I Cor. 7:10,11

We can see by this verse that divorced wifes are encouraged by the Lord to re-marry their husband, or stay single.


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João Tiago

 2007/3/16 15:15Profile
lastblast
Member



Joined: 2004/10/16
Posts: 528
Michigan

 Re: Marrying The Same Person Twice?

Quote:
Now, the question I am asking about this issue is this, How is marrying the same person a second time any different than going and marrying another person? Does anyone considered this to be adultery?



Hi Ben,

There is a world of difference in the scenerios. In the first, one is simply acknowledging their sin in divorcing their covenant spouse---the "remarriage" is the FULL act of repentance publically. They are simply coming back to the relationship that God has ordained and joined as "ONE". It is NEVER adultery to come back to the One God joins you with. It IS however, adultery to join with one God has NOT joined together. In the case of remarriage (while your covenant spouse lives), it IS adultery because one is STILL joined to their covenant spouse..........and will be considered "ONE" to God until one of them dies.

If one is in a relationship Jesus called "adultery", ie: remarriage to another person, it would NOT be adultery to forsake that relationship and return to one's covenant spouse. Again, they are simply repenting from their sin (divorce and remarriage adultery) and returning to their covenant spouse----the one God joined them to. There is absolutely no biblical evidence that a remarriage is binding in the sight of God when that remarriage was termed "adultery" by Him.


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Cindy

 2007/3/16 15:33Profile
PreachParsly
Member



Joined: 2005/1/14
Posts: 2164
Arkansas

 Re:

My only contention would be that when Jesus met the woman at the well, he plainly said that she had more than on husband. I would say if Jesus recongnized that they were husbands, rather than boyfriends, God may very well agree.

Not that what she did was good, no not at all, but none the less Jesus called them husbands.

This topic has been covered very well over the years so I will leave it at what has been said.


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Josh Parsley

 2007/3/16 15:46Profile
HomeFree89
Member



Joined: 2007/1/21
Posts: 797
Indiana

 Re:

Quote:

PreachParsly wrote:
My only contention would be that when Jesus met the woman at the well, he plainly said that she had more than on husband. I would say if Jesus recongnized that they were husbands, rather than boyfriends, God may very well agree.

Not that what she did was good, no not at all, but none the less Jesus called them husbands.

This topic has been covered very well over the years so I will leave it at what has been said.




Did the have the term, "boyfriend" back then?

The Bible forbids remarriage. The world uses the term remarriage, but if it's called adultery in the Bible then it can't be a second marriage.

Jordan


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Jordan

 2007/3/16 17:59Profile
Ekklesia1
Member



Joined: 2006/12/10
Posts: 14


 Re:

Quote:

blinx wrote:
To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

I Cor. 7:10,11

We can see by this verse that divorced wifes are encouraged by the Lord to re-marry their husband, or stay single.


Notice that your passage is not in any disagreement with Deuteronomy 24:1-4, that PreachParsly presented in an earlier post.
Paul tells this woman to remain [b]unmarried[/b] or reconcile knowing full well that if she does [b]remarry[/b] against his command that it is abominiation, according to the law, before the Lord for her to ever go back to her former husband.

Paul telling her to remain [b]unmarried[/b] is conclusive proof that she could indeed marry another in that it would be a [b]"marriage"[/b], even if it is not the right thing to do, otherwise Paul would simply have told her 'do not fornicate" as he had shown example of in verses 7:1-2 there.
If re-marriage weren't possible, then Pauls words to her there are pretty much meaningless.

Paul never tells a single person to divorce and reconcile anywhere because Paul knows that once remarried we are forbidden by God to return to that former spouse. Once remarried it is [b]abomination[/b] to Him to ever reunite that former marriage.

Deuteronomy 24:!-4 is often mistaken as a 'permission' to divorce. It isn't.
It is Moses' (thus Gods) attempt to curb a practice already being carried out in Israel, the casting away of a wife for no justifible cause.

In an attempt to slow this down, Moses lays out requirements for the man that he must give it to her in writing, and he must put it into her own hand, and he must then send her out of his house.
In doing this Moses has made it so that a man would not act in a moment of rashness, but had to purpose in his heart to put this woman away. By the time he sat down and wrote out the bill of divorce he might have enough time to cool down and think about what he was doing.

It apparently didnt work because the practice only grew worse and the Jews even twisted this 'sufferance" to put away a wife for no just reason into a 'commandment' by Moses to put her away for these things so that finally they werent supposedly guilty of anything since it was Moses who 'commanded' this divorce.

Moses also wanted them to understand something. If they put away their wives, if they found some uncleaness in her and felt she was so worthy of being cast out over it, that once she remarried, once she was another mans wife, then she was never under any circumstances to return to him as it would be abomination unto the Lord Himself.

Something quite peculiar that we see in this, is that under all normal circumstances a woman would be free to marry any eligible man if her husband were to die.
But in this situation where the this first husband had put her away finding her to be detestible, even if her new husband died this former man was one of the only men in Israel who was forbidden to ever have her again.
In this case it was 'not lawful' for him to ever have her again.

That says quite a bit about how God sees this practice of divorce, especially for no real reason at all.

There isnt a single NT passage that ever shows that this part of Deut has changed where the woman cannot return to her former husband once remarried.
Pauls saying 'remain [b]unmarried[/b] or reconcile' goes hand in hand with it entirely.




:)

 2007/3/16 18:26Profile









 Re:

Not that it is the same, but I am wondering...

I will be getting married May 5th, here in Korea and then 'again' in Canada, July 7th.

First, is there any thoughts on this?

Second, I said that I do not want to 'lay' together or have any type of 'honeymoon' until the second wedding. Any thoughts?

Sorry, Ben if it is not exactly what you are asking, but it was the first thing that I thought of when I was reading this thread...

God Bless those that stay married through thick and thin,
Brian

 2007/3/16 19:57
Ekklesia1
Member



Joined: 2006/12/10
Posts: 14


 Re:

Quote:

BrianMira wrote:
Not that it is the same, but I am wondering...

I will be getting married May 5th, here in Korea and then 'again' in Canada, July 7th.

First, is there any thoughts on this?

Second, I said that I do not want to 'lay' together or have any type of 'honeymoon' until the second wedding. Any thoughts?

Sorry, Ben if it is not exactly what you are asking, but it was the first thing that I thought of when I was reading this thread...

God Bless those that stay married through thick and thin,
Brian


Same woman?
What's the point?

Different woman?
Polygamy is not God's will for marriage.

Other than that, if it is the same woman, have at it. I dont see any scripture forbidding your renewing your vows or registering your marriage in two different countries.

Only if you divorced her, then she remarried and then became single again somehow, would you be committing abomination by taking her again as your wife.

 2007/3/16 20:35Profile





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