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moreofHim
Member



Joined: 2003/10/15
Posts: 1632


 Re: make-up

Hello :)

I am the one with the daughter -who Mike was refering to. She is now 19. Feel free to email her at [email protected] or visit her blog at www.xanga.com/arielleelise . She is a very special daughter with a heart for the Lord and for the lost (and yes she does wear some makeup :)

This is a subject that you must take to the Lord for yourself. To be sure, it's not a 'salvation' issue- so no worries there. I think it's wonderful that you want to please the Lord in all areas of your life.

In my own life, I do choose to wear some makeup- not alot. My daughter also does the same. I guess you could say we like to 'enhance' our natural beauty :) Please don't feel condemned if you choose to wear some makeup when you feel it is appropriate. But if you feel strongly at some point that the Lord does not want you to wear it- then don't. It's that simple :)

Blessings to you, Chanin


_________________
Chanin

 2008/12/31 12:33Profile
PaulWest
Member



Joined: 2006/6/28
Posts: 3405
Dallas, Texas

 Re:

Hi Laura,

Quote:
When others come to me and ask me what I know on a matter, I tell them what the Lord has shown me.


I understand, this is the natural response. When I was younger in the Lord, I preached vehemently against television, sports, against any and all things that I felt were obstacles in a believer's trek to personal holiness. I, in fact, became the quintessential "obstacle spotter" in our youth group church services and meetings.

Well, I have learnt a few things since then. I have learnt to leave the small stuff to God: tatoos, make-up, music, dancing, T.V., video games, mousse in the hair, jewelry, etc., for these are things that God does microsurgery on as the child grows and progesses to higher levels in His academy. Some of them (in fact, most) fall off completely in time; others are "tweaked" as God tempers the heart. It is not your place nor mine to forbid anyone in God's Name from putting on make-up. When you do this, you deprive the Holy Ghost of His rightful position and impose your own stalwart rules on another. It is much better to point the believer to God, asking, "at 16, why do you feel the need to put on make-up?"

Now, As a grown man, and a loving husband, I can say that I am stunned when my wife puts on a tiny bit of blush, and dresses nice when we go out. I know she does it for me, and my heart skips a beat when I look upon her beauty. Yes, I take much pleasure in the wife of my youth, and we can enjoy each other with clear consciences. Your imposing convictions on mascara would bring instant condemnation into our relationship, if it were the one-size-fits-all instruction as you claim.

Please don't take my challenge the wrong way :)

Brother Paul


_________________
Paul Frederick West

 2008/12/31 14:10Profile
HeartSong
Member



Joined: 2006/9/13
Posts: 3179


 Re:

Brother Paul,

I am not taking your challenge the wrong way - in fact I appreciate being able to talk around this as some of the things that I see causes me great distress and I want to learn how to "warn" without "judging."

Quote:
It is not your place nor mine to forbid anyone in God's Name from putting on make-up.


I did not think I was doing this - can you show me what it is that I said that sounds like this?


Quote:
Your imposing convictions on mascara . . .

I myself still wear mascara. I know that the Lord would rather that I did not, but I have blond eyelashes and I have worn it for so long that I feel ugly without it. It is one of the things that still holds me in bondage. In the meantime, I have found some that does not have all of the chemicals, and I only wear it occasionally.


I am certain that the beauty that your wife possesses has nothing to do with her make up or her clothing, but when you include both in your comments, you tie them together and it sounds as if they do. Is it possible that your reaction is promoting the fact that she wears any make up at all? Or how fancy her clothes are?

The danger is that we are relying on external sources to establish value, which leaves us open to the influence of the enemy. I am sure that the Lord loves the fact that you take delight in each other - but it certainly can't be her make up or her clothing that you love - it is her heart, which shines forth through her eyes, and makes her glow from the inside out. Her external beauty will one day fade, but no one, and nothing, can ever take away the glow that comes from the love of the Lord. It is in Him that all of our value must be established.

 2008/12/31 15:58Profile
moreofHim
Member



Joined: 2003/10/15
Posts: 1632


 Re: preferences

Quote:
When I was younger in the Lord, I preached vehemently against television, sports, against any and all things that I felt were obstacles in a believer's trek to personal holiness


I used to be like this too! I have also learned a few things through time and through humbling trials. I used to be very judgemental about others in some of these areas. That was until the Lord slowly showed me that I was not perfect either and that I had a long way to go in my sanctification. I might not watch sports or tv but I cannot feel any spiritual superiority over those who do. Though I may not watch sports or tv, I can still have alot of heart issues that need to be taken care of and that is no better in the Lord's eyes that my 'thinking' that someone else is not as 'holy' because he/she watches sports or tv.

I know a pastor who I deeply respect who calls these things like styles of music, clothing, make-up, hairstyles, etc.... PREFERENCES. And that's mostly just what they are- preferences. Everyone has their 'preference' when it comes to styles of music, styles of hair, clothing style, make-up/no makeup, liking sports,etc....

These are not 'salvation' issues. Why make a big deal about them when they don't effect someone's salvation. Let each be convicted by the Holy Spirit about these preferences. I would rather major on the majors, not the minors. 'Pick your battles'-so to speak :)

Forbearance is a good thing to grow in! :)

In His love, Chanin


_________________
Chanin

 2008/12/31 16:11Profile
MaryJane
Member



Joined: 2006/7/31
Posts: 3057


 Re:

Greetings Chanin

Not sure I agree fully with what you wrote about clothing, hairstyles, and makeup just being a preference. I think we need to be very careful and examine our hearts daily to know what the Fathers heart is for us in these areas. Especially in the area of clothing, so much of it today is inappropriate and immodest that it makes it very difficult on young men who love the Lord. My three older boys will not even go to the stores in the summertime anymore unless its very earily in the morning. So many women and young girls barely dressed that it becomes a real problem for them. Even with young women who profess to be walking with the Lord and wear some of the revealing clothing and heavy make up will tell you that its just a preferences and that they like dressing that way. They give no regard to their brothers in Christ or the temptation that they are causing. So in some cases the way some one chooses to dress and exhibit them self can become a sin issue for another.

Anyway just my thoughts.

God Bless
MJ

 2008/12/31 17:01Profile
PaulWest
Member



Joined: 2006/6/28
Posts: 3405
Dallas, Texas

 Re:

Hi Laura,

Quote:
I did not think I was doing this - can you show me what it is that I said that sounds like this?



Sorry, I did not mean you were doing this. Forbid was probably a bad word choice. I apologize.

Quote:
I am certain that the beauty that your wife possesses has nothing to do with her make up or her clothing, but when you include both in your comments, you tie them together and it sounds as if they do. Is it possible that your reaction is promoting the fact that she wears any make up at all? Or how fancy her clothes are?


Not at all, sister. The clothes and blush simply accentuate her natural beauty, they enhance. This is a thread about make-up, and cosmetics, which is why I mentioned them. They are contributors to the aesthetical factor in human beings. In my very first post, if you remember, I said that my wife doesn't [i]need[/i] make-up or fancy clothes to look beautiful - and I am well aware that these are products of vanity, they are of the earth. Her true beauty, to me, transcends the mere physical, and this I have come to cherish and adore above all else.

Brother Paul


_________________
Paul Frederick West

 2008/12/31 17:03Profile
White_Stone
Member



Joined: 2008/10/25
Posts: 1196
North Central Florida

 Re:

Dear MaryJane,

Just as I was preparing to reply to Chanin you popped in with [i]my reply[/i].

If my [b][size=x-small][color=CC3300][font=Georgia]preferences [/font][/color][/size][/b] disturb another Saint in their walk, it is no longer just a preference - is it? It has become a stumbling block.

I know in my first reply I started with how I could not reconcile my vanity with the torture of helpless animals. In a way, doesn't the wearing of the popular teenage style of makeup (to look more like a raccoon or a harlot) that causes young men to sin, akin with torturing innocent animals?

If you objectively look at it, wearing makeup is an effort to be something you are not. Perhaps you should examine what you do want to be first.

To avoid causing anyone a problem, in the case of married couples going out for an evening, I am certain they have examined their motives. I am speaking to a 16 year old young woman. I know at 16, no one ever spoke to me about considering what my motives were OR about the consequences of my actions.

You see, at 16, wearing make-up is mor than a 'preference.' It is a statement. Dear rbetty, please consider why you feel you need makeup, or want it. Believe me, it will not change anything except how the boys at school think of you. You really don't want their attention if it is for the wrong reason. You might think you do but nothing is as it seems it will be.

Kindest regards,
white stone

Kindest regards,
white stone

Quote:

MaryJane wrote:
Greetings Chanin

Not sure I agree fully with what you wrote about clothing, hairstyles, and makeup just being a preference. I think we need to be very careful and examine our hearts daily to know what the Fathers heart is for us in these areas. Especially in the area of clothing, so much of it today is inappropriate and immodest that it makes it very difficult on young men who love the Lord. My three older boys will not even go to the stores in the summertime anymore unless its very earily in the morning. So many women and young girls barely dressed that it becomes a real problem for them. Even with young women who profess to be walking with the Lord and wear some of the revealing clothing and heavy make up will tell you that its just a preferences and that they like dressing that way. They give no regard to their brothers in Christ or the temptation that they are causing. So in some cases the way some one chooses to dress and exhibit them self can become a sin issue for another.

Anyway just my thoughts.

God Bless
MJ


_________________
Janice

 2008/12/31 17:43Profile
HeartSong
Member



Joined: 2006/9/13
Posts: 3179


 Re:

Quote:
Not at all, sister. The clothes and blush simply accentuate her natural beauty, they enhance. This is a thread about make-up, and cosmetics, which is why I mentioned them. They are contributors to the aesthetical factor in human beings. In my very first post, if you remember, I said that my wife doesn't need make-up or fancy clothes to look beautiful - and I am well aware that these are products of vanity, they are of the earth. Her true beauty, to me, transcends the mere physical, and this I have come to cherish and adore above all else.


Brother Paul,

You are right of course. Let me try saying it a different way.

When you said:

Quote:
It is much better to point the believer to God, asking, "at 16, why do you feel the need to put on make-up?"


and then immediately follow it with:

Quote:
Now, As a grown man, and a loving husband, I can say that I am stunned when my wife puts on a tiny bit of blush, and dresses nice when we go out.


Do you not think that a 16 year old (or almost any woman) might get the idea that men love it when they wear make up. I know that it is not what you intended to say, and that you clarified it other places, but do you see that they might tend to focus on that one statement?


This is not really my point either - I think I am starting to sound nit-picky (am I?). While we must take care not to be judgmental of others, we must take equal care not to justify away what the Lord may be desirous of having another do - for it is quite possible that we are in error, or that what is acceptable for us, may not be acceptable for another.

 2008/12/31 18:23Profile
PaulWest
Member



Joined: 2006/6/28
Posts: 3405
Dallas, Texas

 Re:

Quote:
Do you not think that a 16 year old (or almost any woman) might get the idea that men love it when they wear make up. I know that it is not what you intended to say, and that you clarified it other places, but do you see that they might tend to focus on that one statement?


Of course! This is a valid point. My objective in this thread is to avoid any kind of legalistic impartation that might be put upon this girl...and anyone else reading these postings. That, basically, it's [i]okay[/i] to look nice, it's okay to wear nice clothes, it's okay to use these things - as long as the motives are pure and the conscience can remain undefiled before God.

That is all that matters - but for some, it is not sufficient. If that were all that was offered as a response, I wouldn't have felt a need to contribute to this topic. I think she deserves to hear it from another side, from the side of grace and sensitivity. Wearing make-up is not an anathema, neither is wearing nice clothes or doing your hair up. It's all about the motive. The precious spikenard poured on the Lord's head raised legalistic vituperations from the observers, but, again, He brought it back to [i]motive[/i], and the woman was gloriously vindicated.

I have learnt to direct people to the same Lord when it comes to issues like this. "Should I wear make-up?" Well, it depends. What are your motives for putting on make-up? "Should I wear this dress?" Well, it depends. What are your motives for wearing this dress? "Shall I pour out this costly fragrance?" Well, it depends. What are your motives? To glorify Christ? To please your husband? Can you do it and yet your heart remain undefiled?
Quote:
This is not really my point either - I think I am starting to sound nit-picky (am I?).


Nah, I don't think so :-)

In fact, you've been really nice and you bring up valid points. I can only hope that my behavior is the same!

Happy New year,

Paul


_________________
Paul Frederick West

 2008/12/31 18:45Profile
HeartSong
Member



Joined: 2006/9/13
Posts: 3179


 Re:

Quote:
In fact, you've been really nice and you bring up valid points. I can only hope that my behavior is the same!


You were a gentleman throughout the whole thing.

Happy New year to you also.

 2008/12/31 20:39Profile





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